manifestation is instant because time doesn’t exist
the true explanation of the common term thrown around in the loa community
if you find yourself saying “but how does time not exist?” or “why don’t i have my desires?” then this post is for you
i believe almost everyone here has been confused by the common term “time does not exist”, or “manifestation is instant”. if it was instant, why didn’t i have my desires already?
time does not exist because there is no past or future. it is what you are aligning yourself with that you are experiencing.
let me go further in depth: when you are “remembering” the past, you are visualizing a moment that you associate in the past, and label it a “memory”. it is scientifically proven each time we remember something further from the present, we never remember it entirely accurate. we may add or miss details that may or may not have ever happened.
when you think about the future, you are visualizing something that has not happened yet. let’s say you have a concert tomorrow. you feel excited, you envision yourself walking or taking the bus/train to your designated area. you imagine how the music will sound, or maybe potential interactions you will have with your friends or the people around you. most importantly, you are happy in this moment, one that has not happened.
the key thing that happens with both remembering the past and envisioning the future, is that it stems from imagination. you are imagining a moment and deciding that this is what happened, or what will happen. and what is the #1 thing talked about in law of assumption? how our imagination dictates our life.
by now, i’m sure you’ve gotten my point. if not, I’ll simplify it: time does not exist, because we merely visualize a moment and label it a memory of the past, or an expectation of the future. we deem this to be true, and it is reflected into our 3D. this means that the only thing that truly exists, is now. it is the present.
so we know only the present is real, then how do we tie this back to how manifestation is instant?
if the only moment happening is the present, the moment we say “i have my desire”, it is done. we do not visualize this happening in a day, or a week, but now, because that is the only moment in time that we truly live in.
we don’t focus in what “time” has passed, because again, it does not exist. there is no delay. instead, it is an identity shift that we go through; it is the shift from aligning your inner man from being someone who identifies with the old story, into your dream self. the manifestation itself does not take time to materialize. the only reason you are still in the old story, is because you are further identifying your 3D with a moment you visualize and assign with a past memory.
your undesired past does not exist if you don’t want it to. a future filled with anxiety and fear does not exist if you don’t want it either. it always starts with the mind, and what you are imagining yourself in.
so yes, manifestation is instant. you already have everything you want!!
theodore spencer is known for many things. well, depending on who you ask at least. some would say the mayor’s delinquent son, all snark and trouble with nothing good to show for it.
others might be a little nicer, simply referring to him as number five: the hotheaded captain of your university’s hockey team. an insanely talented defenseman whose led them through several winning seasons, and never finishes a game without battering something—or more likely someone—in his path.
what never occurred to you, though, was that beneath the cockiness, the iron fists, and the layers of gear he wears like impenetrable armor, there was actually something of substance at his core. a heart.
because if you hadn’t been so eager to get out of training early that afternoon, you might have never discovered that it’s teddy who’s responsible for all of the beautifully crafted, anonymous handwritten letters being tucked into the sliver of space between your car window.
dividers by @cursed-carmine
𑣲a/n lmk if you’d like to be tagged! can’t wait for yall to readdd 🤭 we finna get into some thangs. ciao for now! <3
pairing ⁀➷ bully! cameron cade x plus-size! black reader.
synopsis ⁀➷ cameron has teased you for years on end, but suddenly wants your help with schoolwork. you oblige, but soon find out his hatred for you is not as it seems.
song of chapter ⁀➷ ‘wish you well’ by brent faiyaz (unreleased)
word count + warnings ⁀➷ 3.9k || 18+, nsfw content, no minors! bully!cam, nerd reader, jealous! cam, teasing, nitpicking, mentions of masturbation, one-sided crush, soft fem domme reader, body appreciation, slapping (cameron likes it🤭), jerking off.
‘darling, i don’t wish you well. when you ain’t with me, i want you crying.’
ᥫ᭡
bully! cameron, who seemed to despise your entire existence.
you couldn’t quite figure it out, but each shoulder check, mocking laugh and condescending comment, let you know he for sure hated your guts. you only shared one class with the highly esteemed quarterback, but ran into him on a constant basis in the college hallways.
it was like cameron’s unpaid job was to put you down. pointing out any little mistake you might make—from tripping on your on two feet to dropping your books on the school's floor, cameron is there to let you know how pathetic you really were.
can’t see where you’re going? you’d think with glasses that fucking thick, you’d be able to see miles away.
you ignored him each time, continuing on with homework assignments for your next class without a word. this thing between you two had gone on since your days of high school—you couldn’t understand it. you would’ve thought after years of teasing, he’d grow tired and find someone else to pick with, but cameron’s attention remained lasered on you.
it’s your bully cameron who asks for a request from you. you’re face deep in a cell biology book when he approaches you in the reserved study room. you often found yourself in the library long after school hours, catching up on school work and spending spare time here instead of parties or social functions. you only had one best friend and didn’t do well in large gatherings. school, family, and home were your main priorities.
when cameron sits across from you at the table, you immediately note the expression on his face. he looks serious. more serious than you’ve ever seen him before. he usually held this demeanor during practice or before a big game. while part of you is annoyed, the other half is intrigued. what did he want?
cameron is the one to ask if you could tutor him throughout the week. he’d heard from classmates about the essays and homework you contributed to. you were a fucking genius and able to help almost everyone get their grades up to at least a ‘c’ average. he desperately needed to get his grades together, or he would risk being kicked off the schools football team.
you’re unsure. this was the same guy who made fun of your glasses at any chance, picked on your height and joked about your smarts. he now wanted your help?
“absolutely not.” you’re firm on your stance.
that is until—
“i’ll pay you good. whatever price you want.”
a day turned into weeks and your sessions with cameron continued. the two of you worked on a multitude of subjects. anything cameron needed help with, you were willing to provide. he made sure to pay on time before each session, and you made sure to help him receive the best grades possible. you couldn’t quite put your finger on cameron cade. he was interesting, but he remained quiet—a complete difference from the way he behaved when his friends were around. he worked, listened to what you asked of him and went back to home as usual.
at least that’s what you believed.
unbeknownst to you, cameron cade didn’t always go directly home after every study session.
it didn’t start like this initially.
cameron truly found you annoying.
your perfect hair, starched clothing and positive energy pissed him off. why were you so chipper at 9 in the goddamn morning? why did you know the answer to every question the professor asked? why did seeing your face make him so fucking angry?
he couldn’t understand it.
the one thing cameron was able to manage was his actions towards you. berating and calling out everything you did to was easier than sitting with his true feelings.
the feelings that hit cameron late at night when it was only him and his thoughts in the comfort of his bedroom. not a sound or soul around—just the whir of a nearby fan blowing throughout the room and the ache of his dick trapped behind boxer briefs.
those same thoughts made his vision blur as he imagined your frame underneath the stockings and pleated skirts you wore. he’d think of how you’d look on top of him. would you take your time and ride him slow—or be just as desperate as he’d been and ride him as wildly as you could?
it was the same thoughts that made cameron growl into the air as he came hotly—sticky white substance dripping over his chest and hand, before he washed up to imagine it all over again. maybe a different fantasy this time—one of you, and he crammed in the back seat of his car. he wouldn’t mind, cameron would find a way to make space for you.
cameron’s maladaptive daydream is interrupted as there’s a sound right outside his bedroom window. cameron lived at home with his parents as it was easier to attend school and save money at the same time. he remained in his childhood bedroom and often gazed out the window to look down on the neighbors and their current shenanigans, but it’s during this that he notices a familiar face and shape.
it’s you…
it’s you and cameron’s next door neighbor.
his neighbor lived at home with his parents, just like cameron. he also played football for the school’s rival team, so cameron has no clue as to why you’re meeting with him. he’s obviously an enemy, but you’re downstairs being best friends with him.
cameron watches as the young man hugs you goodbye and proceeds to walk to your car. you smile stupidly in his face before starting your car to drive off into the night, leaving cameron as confused as ever.
“what the fuck?”
cameron lets the time pass. he writes the interaction with you and his neighbor off as a tutoring session, believing that you wouldn’t be in any kind of relationship with someone like him. it helped put his mind at ease for just a bit.
that is, until he encounters the two of you once again.
you both were exiting a local restaurant just as cameron was crossing the street. it’s late at night and cameron is supposed to be walking the family dog, but finds himself eavesdropping on the conversation you two hold. back pressed to the brick wall of a nearby building, cameron listens carefully as you bust into genuine laughter at his neighbor’s joke.
“no, but seriously, y/n, you’re fucking amazing and i really appreciate you.”
“oh, it’s nothing,” he hears you giggle and you never giggled while you were with him. the sound of your beautiful laugh makes his chest tighten. he wished he’d been the reason for your joy. “i can’t wait to see you again. have a good night, babe.”
babe?
the pet name enrages cameron. he holds enough irritation to knock down this entire brick wall, race over, snatch you up and knock that loser the fuck out.
but cameron does nothing.
you weren’t his. he had no rights to you, no rights to behave this way towards you.
days later, cameron’s phone vibrates in his pants pocket.
it’s a text message from you.
hey, i’m sorry to cancel on you, but i won’t be able to make it today. maybe we can meetup sometime next week?
cameron’s eyes lowered as he read over the message once again. he took a deep inhale and clicked on the power button to his phone.
you and he met in the city’s library for tutoring lessons every wednesday and friday without fail. for weeks, cameron spritzed cologne over his neck and wrists, applied oil to his short hair and made sure to keep a tube of mint scented chapstick in his bookbag for…educational purposes. he absolutely looked forward to sessions with you. whether they be one-sided with only your voice speaking throughout the library or silent altogether—wednesday’s and friday’s were his favorite days of the week.
yet, you cancelled.
cameron couldn’t understand it.
are you sure? we can probably meet sometime later tonight, i really don’t to fail this upcoming exam.
cameron paces his room as he awaits a response from you, hoping his excuse doesn’t sound too desperate.
you won’t fail. we can meet up next week.
you wouldn’t budge, and cameron can’t come up with another reason.
“fuck,” he huffs, tossing his phone onto the bed. cameron takes only a second to collect his thoughts before racing to change out of his current outfit and into looser attire.
he needed to blow off some steam.
a two-hour workout session helped to clear cameron’s mind just a little, but not nearly enough. a few bench presses, a jog on the treadmill and a boxing session with a punching bag—yet he kept thinking of you and the message you’d sent earlier. part of him wanted to let you know how he felt—to tell you the resentment he held towards you was misplaced and that he didn’t know how to regulate emotions regarding you. the other half wished you could read his mind and know exactly what he wanted.
cameron passes the school’s library as he leaves the gym. had it been any other day, cameron would’ve went home as usual, but the cancellation of today’s session was getting to him. he couldn’t fucking think straight. he stopped inside and decided to take a seat at the table you and he usually sat in. cameron sorted through his bookbag and fetched textbooks for tomorrows exam, eyes darting over the words as he tried to comprehend the reading material.
you would’ve helped him to understand it.
your calm voice reading over the text before asking what did he think about it. you would’ve cracked open a notebook and wrote down important information with your black ball point pen. you would’ve taken your time and used real-world situations to compare with the homework, helping him learn everything he can before a big test.
you’re all cameron can think about.
so much so that he swears he can hear you.
it’s the same laugh he’d heard for the first time the other day, and cameron is positive he’s completely lost his mind until he sees you and his neighbor emerge from a study room. cameron hides behind the large textbook to avoid his cover being blown. he listens closely and peers from behind the spine of the book as you hug and peck the cheek of his neighbor.
cameron can only sit for so long—waiting until his neighbor has left the library to follow behind as you slip into the basement area of the building.
you don’t hear or see him—cameron makes sure to keep quiet as he tiptoes behind you, searching for words to perfectly convey his thoughts.
“what the fuck are you doing, y/n?”
there’s aggravation in his tone, and the sound of his tenor causes you to flinch—not jump, but simply raise your shoulders in surprise. you turn on the toes of your leather loafers, eyes widened in surprise at cameron cade’s presence.
“are you following me?”
cameron ignores your question. “answer me, y/n.”
“i’m minding my business, cameron, that’s what i’m doing. now answer my question, are you following me?”
cameron pushes past you to walk further into the dusty basement, brushing towards a nearby book case before he speaks. “why are you dragging this nigga all over town? smiling in his fucking face, hugging him and shit.”
“because i can, cameron. why does any of this matter to you? why are you watching my every fucking move.”
“you and that stupid motherfucker are flaunting around town, i can’t help but to see it.”
he expects you to make a run for it—for you to angrily march up the stairs and never talk to him again, but you instead hold a conversation with pinched brows on your gorgeous face. he can’t help the way his stomach whirls when he’s able to see you fully. the basement of this dusty library is dimly lit, just a flicking light bulb that sways back and forth in the corner of the room, but it helps cameron to see you.
you looked beautiful as usual, but a bit more laid back tonight. boho braids flowing around your shoulders—free from the tight bun you often wore, a small hue of blush upon your round cheeks and no glasses on your pretty face.
you weren’t wearing your glasses.
he only takes a second. brief and steady as he glances over you. “where are your glasses?”
“huh?” you squint and it’s not because you weren’t wearing said glasses. usual black frames are not on your face because you were looking for a change in appearance, at least for tonight.
“you heard me. where are your glasses, y/n?”
you’re surprised cameron picked up on it, but cameron forgot absolutely nothing when it came to you. he’s like a wolf hunting prey. he can’t miss the curls strewn through your hair, the neat pressing of your outfit or the heady scent of the perfume you’re wearing.
“and you’re wearing fucking perfume…you-you put that on for him, didn’t you?”
“who?”
“who? you tell me, y/n, who is the nigga to you?”
you’d never seen him like this. so hostile and on edge over you, but it’s at this moment that reality sets and you remember who you’re dealing with. you don’t owe him anything. not an explanation or even an excuse. you push forward and wiggle out of cameron’s intimidating stance.
“it doesn’t matter. it doesn’t matter what i do, or who i do it with, cameron. you aren’t my boyfriend, so it’s none of your business, and i think it’s best that you leave.”
you walk towards the entrance and hold the heavy door open, waiting for cameron cade to exit onto the other side of it, but he just stands in place. icy eyes peer back at you and they’re unforgiving. the only thing that diverts cameron’s attention is the sound of a notification of your phone as it pings from your book bag.
shit.
it’s a short race between you and cameron as you both rush over to grab the device. you should’ve knew better. a 6-foot behemoth was easily going to overpower you. the most athletic thing you conquered was a brisk walk up a flight of stairs to enter your favorite coffee shop.
“give me my phone, cameron!” he holds a hand outward to block the catty hits you give in attempt to get your phone back.
cameron forgets his place.
the idea of someone else having access to you made him go crazy. cameron could almost handle the thought of him not being with you, but someone else getting the pleasure of being near you was enough to drive him through a wall.
“i don’t recall this being any of your fucking business, cameron. why does it matter what i’m doing?!”
“because you’re fucking hugging and kissing him after canceling a tutoring lesson with me.”
“i was helping him study cameron—there! does that make you feel any fucking better?”
“fuck no! you’re getting fucking dressed up for him, but bailing out on me, i’m fucking pissed.” you can sense the genuine anger surging through cameron as he speaks. his usually light irises darken as they pierce into you.
“i’m sorry, cameron.”
but it’s not enough.
“nah, i need to talk to that motherfucka, i need to know something.”
“you’re going to talk to him for what, cameron? i’m confused as to how this is any of your concern. you hate me, so why are you so worried?”
you and cameron begin to tussle. he’s attempting to push past you, searching all throughout your book bag for the vibrating cell phone. you’re holding him by the arm to stay in place, but cameron’s strong—tall, big—any of the words you could think of, so you have little to no fight at this moment, being easily brushed to the side as he moves about.
it’s a last-minute effort, but the heavy smack you send to his left cheek stops him in his tracks. the inside of your palm rings, while a stinging red mark forms on the side of cameron’s face. you’re about to say something—an apology of sorts when cameron forces you to pause. he releases the tiniest surprised moan—low and trapped in the back of his throat, as you watch his dick twitch behind the confines of his shorts.
cameron is silent. pleading eyes wandering over you as he tries to understand why do you turn him on like this? your book bag and the contents inside fall to the ground once cameron drops it.
“you like that? y-you like me smacking you around?” you’re taken aback by his reaction.
cameron remains quiet, but his dick answers whatever questions you have. you can practically feel the heat radiating from it, as he grows harder, continuing to flinch around underneath his clothes.
“answer me, cameron.”
it’s like chewing glass, and cameron can’t swallow the broken pieces down fast enough to speak. he’d kept these feelings locked away for years. years of longing, aching and needing to be near you vanished into thin air from a harsh slap you’d given him. cameron can’t believe the magic you hold.
“answer me, cam,” you’re on the tips of your leather shoes, lush lips skimming across his neck as you speak. you await an answer, but only draw out another shaky moan from him. “tell me, cameron and i can help you feel better. i gotta hear you say it.”
he gulps sharply, forcing his eyelids closed as he tries to regulate. “f—fuck, fuck, yes, yes.”
you began to soften up some. smugness to your voice when you question him, finding delight in the sorrowful position you have him in.
“can i see it, cameron?”
“w-what?” he stutters. “you—you want to see me?”
cameron’s been convinced you were disgusted with his entire presence, hearing your words makes his dick stiffen more. cameron can’t think clearly, but he knows he wants this, knows he wants you to want it as well.
“let me see you, baby.”
you’ve switched—and so quickly at that. cameron’s not sure if you’ve always been like this, but starting as a timid nerd and turning into a sweet voiced domme, shakes him to his core. cameron’s willing, though. he’s happy you were into it like he was.
so cameron obeys.
untying the string to his shorts, cameron starts to fumble with the clothing items until they fall to the ends of his ankles. and the expression on your face cannot be contained—a mix of surprise and satisfaction. you expected a handsome boy like him to have a nice dick—well groomed and beautiful in color, but his length? cameron was a fairly decent size. you would rather not give him too much credit, but his umber tinted dick truly took your breath away.
“you’re big, cameron.”
“yeah?” he’s breathless as he responds.
nodding your head as you continue. “yes and you’re so pretty, you look so good, baby.”
cameron could die happily with the way you’re talking to him, his dick bobs in appreciation from the complimentary words you utter.
“show me what you can do.”
and cameron’s on it immediately, willing to do whatever he can to please you. his large hard drags over his hard dick in a fast motion, jerking along the tightened shaft without regard or concern. his eyes flick back and forth—from you and down to his piece in hand, while you watch.
“you’re rough.”
you giggle a bit as you cross over the room, taking a few steps to get closer to him, as cameron continues to jerk his dick raggedly. he’s too excited—too anxious to reach his nut, that he can hardly contain himself.
“what’s the rush? we got all the time in the world.”
cameron’s looking to you for relief, awaiting whatever you can give him to get off completely. you step beside him and attempt to reach his height from the short distance you stand, clothed breasts brushing the outside of his strong arms as you linger.
the pad of your soft thumb traces over the end of his chiseled jaw, slowly finding your way to
his bottom lip as you grin softly. “open your mouth, cam.”
you only have to ask once because cameron trusts you. he doesn’t know why, but a major part of him knows you’d get him there without a hassle. cameron’s tongue wraps around your thumb without hesitation, moaning in satisfaction at the faint smell of perfume along your skin. his eyes fall closed in satisfaction of the contact.
“drool on that dick, baby, i want you to get it wet for me.”
you pull your hand away from his lips and cameron follows the instructions, opening his mouth wide enough that an elongated string of spit hits the base of his dick without pause. it’s fucking sexy when he does it, hand holding onto a nearby bookshelf as you watch intensely. you try not to moan and only enjoy the show, but it’s almost impossible with a star football player falling apart the simple commands you give.
“do you want me to touch it, cam? want me to make you feel good?”
and it’s more than anything he’s ever wanted in his life. cameron’s skull could rattle with how fast his head shakes. you only give him a little, gentle fingertips twisting at the head of his dick while he shivers in response.
“yes—yeah, please, y/n, please.”
then you think. “but, do you deserve it? have you been good, cameron?”
cameron knows the truth—he’d been acting a fucking fool as of late, but he was here now and he was willing to try, willing to try and be good just for you.
“i can—i can be better, y/n. i can be calmer, nicer—fuck, just touch me please.”
“promise me cameron. promise you’ll be good from here on out. promise you’ll listen to me.”
he nods furiously, “yes, yes, i’ll be good, i’ll be good and i’ll do whatever you want.”
with the lubrication of his spit, you’re easily able to tug on cameron’s big dick, opposite hand finding purchase around his wide neck. you choke him softly, just enough that it takes his breath way and makes him moan at the same time.
“lift your shirt up, i wanna see you, baby, i gotta see you.”
with hardly any focus, cameron scrambles to unzip his jacket and raise his plain t-shirt like you commanded him to. your soft hand grazes the rippled skin of his abs in admiration. his skin is damp from a previous workout and the anxiety of being in your hold and you can smell it on him. the scent of his natural sweaty aroma combined with a woodsy cologne makes your pussy clench around nothing.
you wanted him.
you didn’t mind the idea of cameron bending you over this bookcase and fucking you like nobody’s business, but you knew better—knew you couldn’t give it to him that easily. cameron would have to earn it. you jerking him off was an act of kindness after canceling the tutoring session. anything from this point forward would require some serious effort.
disclaimer: this is based off of my personal experience and what worked for me!
1. stop “trying”
- i was constantly preventing myself from getting the results i wanted because i was trying, instead of just being. law of assumption is all about being, assuming, and deciding. one thing that clicked for me was that my constant listening to subliminals, checking the mirror constantly, finding something new to fix, was just holding me back
- i was able to finally stop “trying” and instead just “be” when i just told myself there was nothing to fix, because i was already going to manifest my desired appearance, it was inevitable. this allowed me to stop the constant checking in the mirror, obsession with subliminals and affirmations, and beauty rituals. it was already done, so theres no reason to try.
2. i acted like the version of me who already had my desired appearance
- i took a second to reflect and think about what the future version of me who already had the appearance that i wanted would do. for example, my current self was counting calories. but in my head, i knew the “ideal” version of me would never do that, she would simply just eat healthy without needing to track it constantly. so thats exactly what i started to do. i imagined this future version of myself would drink coffees and yogurt bowls in the morning. so thats what i started doing.
- another example would be, my current version was mainly wearing baggy shirts and jeans everyday. but when i reflected, i realized that the version of myself that i wanted to be, would never wear that. i knew she would wear more fashionable and feminine pieces. so thats exactly what i started to do.
- did i feel insecure at times, or as if i wasnt “ready” to do these actions yet? sure. but i persisted, and although at times i felt uncomfortable, deep down i knew i was on the right path, like i was actively becoming who i wanted to be. that feeling was very satisfying
3. i persisted
- i didnt try hard, affirm more, or listen to more subliminals. i just persisted in my belief that the appearance i wanted, was already mine. i was already beautiful. it wasnt about convincing myself or forcing myself to “feel” beautiful, but just knowing i already was, and any thought that contradicted that, i just let it pass by. i didnt engage with it at all.
y'all have GOT to stop with the ai fics. put ChatGPT+ down, put Grok down, put microsoft CoPilot down and whatever the hell else!! AI is a learning software, meaning when you plug your writing & creative content (yo lil headcanons and fic ideas) in there, it is STORING IT and then circulating it out to other people who are asking it "give me a fanfic idea." !! It is also REGURGITATING other people's ideas back to YOU.
if it really gets that serious just take a hiatus 😭but baby i'm begging you to get off that stuff PLEASE
summary: the one where cameron shows you how you deserve to be treated.
word count: ~9k (oops?)
pairing: dom!cameron cade x black!sub!reader
warnings: 18+!!! kind of a slow burn, subdrop, d/s dynamics, subspace, angst, smut, weed smoking, friends to lovers, hints to reader being plus size, dacryphilia, degradation, aftercare, vulgarity, smacking/impact play, oral sex (both receiving)
a/n: i was going through subdrop while writing this and just needed some comfort so enjoy!
—————
An abyss.
That’s what this felt like.
A chasm so deep that when you looked up, you could see stars in the sky in the middle of the day.
You were suspended in thick matter, like glue. This made it hard to get out.
“Aftercare isn’t real”
The words repeat in your head like a mantra.
But it is real. There’s just something about guys wanting to play the dominant role and forgetting how vital aftercare is at the end of a scene.
The sex was good, but the dopamine crash wasn’t worth it.
You trust a guy enough to play but once they feel they’ve scored, the entire dominant act ends. They get their fix and suddenly they’re a different person. Cold and short before they leave you there to clean yourself up.
No reassurance. No soothing.
Just… nothing.
The names they used to degrade you feel like scarlet letters on your chest, everlasting brandings that others can see.
Your phone rang for the 7th time in the past hour but you can’t move your arm just an inch over to grab it, lift it and hit the green button, let alone have an entire conversation.
Your screen goes black once again and it feels like a weight off your already exhausted shoulders. Except it lights up again and it feels like an elephant sitting on your chest.
You lie on your side and stare at the wall ahead, not even taking the fraction of a second to see it was your best friend calling.
Cameron Cade, the famous football player who also dabbles in the BDSM scene. You two met at a club, both of you just getting a feel for the scene and finding comfort in each other as newbies.
But Cameron was a natural at this. He earned his stripes and many desired to get him as theirs but they never got past a few play sessions with him.
Cameron has had many good times with subs. You hear whispers in the clubs about just how good he is but you? You can only hope to find a Dom as good as him.
“Bunny! I know you see me calling you what the hell is go-,”
Cameron’s voice startled you but you were so stuck that you couldn’t even flinch, the only thing your body could do to acknowledge the shock is make your stomach flip, making you nauseous.
“Bun?” You see his figure step into your room but you can’t move.
When he crouched down on the other side of the bed to face you, his eyes met yours. You can’t process the emotions in his, but he certainly can in yours.
“Please don’t tell me-,”
“It’s happening again,” you confirm without him explicitly saying it.
“Bun, I told you. These guys out here aren’t-”
“Real” you finish for him again, “They aren’t real Doms.”
This has happened more than Cameron would like to acknowledge. He takes his role seriously and it pisses him off that people claim this title just to hurt people in the end.
“How long have you been like this?”
“Don’t know.” your throat is dry, causing your voice to crack. Time isn’t a thing to you right now.
“Bunny-“
“Don’t call me that right now,” suddenly your voice is hard as stone.
Bunny.
Cameron always called you that, even when you two were nothing but a pair of rookies under the red lights of the club sipping cranberry juice through cocktail straws.
It kind of just stuck and it became your sub persona. You figured using the name he coined for you would make you feel closer to him, even when the gold chains that dangled in your face weren’t his.
“C’mon, we’re going for a drive.” It wasn’t a question, it was a declaration to let you know you didn’t have an option.
Your eyes met his, he noticed just how hollow yours were, it made his stomach ache.
He’s tired of people fucking around with his Bunny. He’d watch for your enemies and those who hurt you, to let them know they contend with him.
“Help me?” Your voice is shot and tired. You didn’t have to ask, you knew Cameron would pull the mountain of blankets back and help you up.
You’re lifted with ease (he always took pride in how much he could bench) and carried to the bathroom where he sits you on the counter. He grabs your mouth wash off the counter, filling up the little cup and holding it to your lips.
The gesture is so sweet and you’re not sure if he’s aware of just how much you crave this from him all the time.
When you’re done swishing, your back bends to spit it down the drain. Next, he hands you your tooth brush, bristles dressed in toothpaste. While you brush your teeth, he wets a cotton pad with a cleansing toner to carefully swipe across your face.
Then it’s your bonnet he takes off with care, moisturizing your scalp and hair to give it some life before covering it with a shower cap.
When you’re done he turns the shower on for you, steam immediately filling the room.
“Take all the time you need, I’ll be right out here then we can get going, yeah?”
He pulls you in for a tight embrace, his cologne flooding your nose. It’s a scent of comfort, a smell that relaxes your nervous system because wherever this smell is, it means Cameron is near.
You take your time in the shower. Letting the hot water disintegrate your fears and worries. When you emerge from the bathroom, Cameron is sitting on the edge of your bed with your comfort clothes laid out.
Baggy sweatpants, an oversized burgundy hoodie with his number on it and some fuzzy socks.
He gives you your privacy to go sit in the living room, continuing to wait.
Before you know it, you’re in his passenger seat, cruising the back roads of town until he pulls into a field. Cameron digs in the glove compartment for the blunts he rolled just before he came over.
He pushes his seat back, reclining slightly to get comfortable and you follow suit.
It doesn’t take long for the car to fill up with smoke. Tinashe playing in the background as you exhale.
“Do you want to talk about it?” He does a quick French inhale before passing the blunt back to you.
You don’t answer right away, inhaling the smoke into your lungs, holding it there until you can’t anymore.
“He said aftercare isn’t real” another inhale as you sink into your seat passing it back to Cameron, muttering a small “I’m done” to signal that you’ve reached a spot where you’re comfortably high.
“What a fucking cuck,” Cameron spits. He can’t count how many times on both his hands and feet the number of fake doms he’s had to call out for shit like this.
Pushing subs to their limits just to leave them to their own devices when the scene is over. It makes him sick. He’s stood up for subs who were strangers, subs he’s played with in the past, new or seasoned- he didn’t play that shit.
The scene is a safe space for so many, a getaway from the real world and it fills him with rage to know people are infiltrating something he respects down to his marrow. Weaseling their way in just to get a quick fuck from people who are entrusting their play partner with their mind, body and soul.
He’s furious to know it’s happening to his Bunny.
It’s been years since you two have met, growing alongside each other. Talking, learning and bonding.
Your bond reaches a level so deep that many think he is yours and you’re his.
If only.
“Can I be truthful?” You glance over at him, that sinking feeling coming back to your stomach.
“You can always be 110 with me, you know that.” His hand rests on your thigh, he’s trying to be helpful but the act sends goosebumps across your body.
“Promise me that no matter what I say… no matter what I tell you, that you’re gonna stick around.”
He chuckles, eyes low and brows scrunching together. His smile is so goofy when he’s high, it usually calms you down but this was serious.
“Girl, what? You can’t get rid of me that ea-“
“Cameron, promise me. Please.”
The atmosphere changes. Suddenly it seems as if you’re sitting in dead silence, like the r&b isn’t bleeding from the speakers.
“I..? Yeah. Yeah I promise.” He stuttered but he wasn’t lying. Cameron says it all the time, you can’t get rid of him.
But that’s the problem.
That sentiment is exactly why you’re here.
You see the blunt is still lit between his fingers. You snatch it from his grasp and take one more big inhale to give yourself the courage, trying to coax your anxiety to calm down for once.
His forehead is scrunched in a frown, slowly taking the blunt back from you, taking one more hit himself.
“Talk to me.” Worry lying beneath his tone.
You open your mouth many times to speak but nothing comes out. The two sides of your mind playing tug of war. The words want to come out, they need to come out but there is a tight lasso reeling them back in.
“It’s okay,” he encourages.
“I… Isaidyourname.” The words come out too fast and jumbled together for Cameron’s high state to comprehend.
“What?” His eyes scan your face, trying to make sense of it all.
“During my last scene I…,” The cotton mouth makes this so much harder, “I said your name.”
Cameron stared at you, giving many blinks until a lightbulb went off in his head.
“Is that why the fucker didn’t perform aftercare?”
“I’m not sure why he didn’t, I just… he just didn’t.”
Cam is quick to put the blunt out, cracking the window just a tad to clear the smoke, figuratively and literally. You bit your lip so hard you started to taste the metallic crimson on your tongue.
“Stop doing that,” Cameron reached over to gently pull your lip from between your teeth, “You hurt yourself when you do that.”
See? This is exactly why you cried his name that night.
He is a natural and makes it so easy for you to slip.
“Do you want to talk about why you said my name or do you want to leave it at that?”
His voice was so soft and his eyes didn’t shy away from yours.
“Ever since the day I met you, Cam.” You shake your head and look out your window as the tears start to flow, hiccuping due to your lungs needing air, “I have tried to replicate that feeling over and over again. I tried to make it tangible but…”
“No one can make you feel the way I do,” His index finger and thumb grip your chin to gently turn your face back to him, "C'mon Bunny, don’t cry.”
“It’s embarrassing!” Your tears stuck to your eyelashes, making it difficult to see, “God, you’re my best friend and-,”
“I make you feel safe.”
You two had a habit of finishing each other’s sentences. How cliche, but that’s just how you two were from the beginning.
“So fucking safe,” you started to snivel and Cam’s heart broke with every drop of a tear, “Every mutter of your name from other subs at the parties… it fills me with so much envy and rage and I feel so selfish for wishing it was me. I’ve always wanted it to be me.”
Cameron doesn’t speak, he’s always like a sponge in moments like this. Soaking in your words to understand instead of responding just to speak.
“This isn’t the subdrop speaking, I mean, it is but this has been building overtime and after saying your name I just couldn’t hold it in anymore and I can’t lose you-“
“You’re never gonna lose me,”
He couldn’t tell if your eyes were red from smoking beyond your limits or from crying but he didn’t like it.
“You’re always going to be my Bunny.”
It was in that moment you really looked and relaxed in his warm gaze. Just his tone alone lets you know that he had skin in this game.
My Bunny… he said my Bunny.
Claiming you for himself.
“I think you knew deep down that you always had me wrapped around your finger,” The pad of his thumb swipes a tear away, “I was at your every beck and call. I just never wanted to assume your feelings. So I stood by and I took care of you in ways that you allowed me to, not wanting to overstep.”
Cameron’s own eyes watered at the way your face was contorted in pain. Your eyes were so puffy and he loathed to see you this way.
“Had I spoken up sooner you wouldn’t be feeling like this,”
“This isn’t on you, Cam. Not even close! I fell in bed with those men but they’re the ones to blame! They’re the ones… who are preying on people like me to get a quick nut and not following through with their role. Don’t you blame yourself.”
“But I watched as you dropped. I could have stopped it,”
“I could have stopped it,” you correct him, “But you know me, glutton for punishment I guess.”
“Well not anymore.” He reached over to hold your hand, kissing your knuckles.
“I’m gonna open the sunroof so we can sit here, relax and just look at the stars. Then we’re gonna take you home, run you a bubble bath, turn on some Bob’s Burgers and just… be in each other’s company.”
You started to feel the elephant lift off your chest, a weight you’d been carrying for quite some time.
The two of you recline your seats while the sun roof opens, revealing the twinkling orbs in the midnight sky.
“The stars remind me of your freckles,” you whisper, turning to look at him. He is such a beautiful man, eyes captivating and his smile always felt like home, “They’re like little kisses from angels before you were sent down here.”
He blushed. He’s fucking blushing.
“You flatter me”
“Cameron Cade you have always been beautiful to me. Before I knew you as the football star or the well respected Dom in the city’s BDSM scene,”
He chuckles lightly at your words, trying to not blush even harder.
“You were always just… Cameron, to me. Cam, the bright eyed and bushy tailed newbie like me. From the moment I looked in your eyes under those red club lights, I knew… I knew you were meant to be in my life.”
“Would you believe me if I said I felt the same way?” His eyes flickering from your eyes to your lips and back to your eyes again, “I thank God everyday that I met you.”
Your eyes stung once more, blinking away the tears that threatened to spill, a wide grin growing on your face, “Now who is flattering who?”
As the night progressed, Cameron kept his word. He ran you home, prepared a bubble bath, ordered your favorite take out and had Bob’s burgers ready when you were done.
Days went by and Cameron didn’t press the subject of you saying his name. Despite you mentioning how you wanted him in ways that otherwise were forbidden, he didn’t overstep and continued to take care of you in ways that you needed.
However, on your end, you were burning to talk about it. The topic was burning on your tongue and in moments where he was close, you just wanted to pull him in and have his lips on yours.
Each day that he left to fulfill his football star obligations, he would come back to make sure you were well and taken care of.
Today, he returned and his cologne was profound, in a good way of course. It usually lingers and you’re fine but today you just needed him near, it’s different.
“We can talk about it if you want,” his head turns to you while he hangs his jacket the hook he designated as his.
“What do you m-,”
“You’re gnawing away at your lip again,” he comes to sit close to you, his thumb meeting the skin just below your bottom lip to ease it from the vicious grip of your teeth.
“What are we doing?” The golden question finally being asked.
“What do you want to do?” He retorts
“No, I asked you first!” A playful push to his chest has that glinting smile appearing on his face before he settles.
He clenches his jaw as he ponders over his thoughts, trying to figure out the best way he wants to say this.
“I want more. But if you want to erase everything we talked about the other night that works too. My main priority is meeting your needs in the way you see fit.”
“You have to make your needs a priority too,”
“My needs and wants are your needs and wants” He said it as if it was plain as day, “You need to be taken care of? I need to be the one to do it. You need to talk about something to get it off your chest? I want to be the one you unload it all on. You need a hug? I want to be the one to wrap you in a warm embrace,”
His eyes didn’t leave yours for even a second, it’s sort of intimidating. But you suppose that’s what makes him so magnetic.
“Or-,” he shrugged, “if you just want a friend, I’ll be there. I just need to know.”
You know what you wanted. You’d been keeping it locked up for years, so why is it so hard to just say it? Why did it feel so exposing?
“Don’t get shy on me now.” He flashes that dizzying smile.
“I don’t want anyone else to experience you.”
Flat out. Just like that. It was blunt and there was no other way around it.
“I don’t like who I am when I’m envious of other people muttering your name. I don’t like who I am when I expose myself to men who can’t even hold a light to you. I’ve loved having you as my best friend but I just need more and that may make me selfish but I-,”
The smell of Cameron is closer than you’ve ever experienced and it’s only because his lips are on yours now. His hand is on your jaw to pull you closer and the rapid pace of his breathing is a sign of just how bad he’s been wanting to do this.
How bad he’s been needing this.
“Cam-“ you needed to catch your breath but you needed more of him so that took precedence. You were grabbing fistfuls of his shirt, your tongue dancing with his, he tastes so good it’s inebriating.
“Please” he sounded so pretty when he whimpered, “Just come here, Bunny. Just.. please”
He pulled you forward to sit in his lap and his hands are grabbing at your waist. All Cameron ever wanted was to have you like this and be able to kiss on you.
He wove his hands in your hair to lightly pull at your roots, exposing your neck so he could get a lay of the land before his attack.
His teeth nip at the skin of your neck and you can’t help the moan that escapes.
“There goes my Bunny”
Your eyes rolled at the drop in his voice, the dominant side of him was taking control and he could tell just by the way you were melting into him that you were ready to submit.
“Cam-“ a pathetic plea when his hands grip your ass in an attempt to get you even closer.
“Yes, Baby?” He pulls your face away, and he is in awe at how fucking sexy you look. Lips glistening, eyelids heavy with a slack jaw.
He’s unaware of just how ravishing he looks right now. Lips red and swollen, nostrils flared as he tried to calm himself down and you can see the fire in his eyes.
He can see an eye of a storm in the sky of your mind, your eyes brimming with tears as the hurricane winds blow you each and every way.
“I need you.” your chin trembles and your hands squeeze his wrists.
“Not right now, baby”
His rejection guts you and he can see you panicking.
“No, no. Breathe with me. Relax.” His voice is stern but the touch of his thumbs on your cheeks is tender.
“I just mean we need more time to build this. My job is to deliver but it’s also my job to be thorough. I may know you but I need to know you, Bunny.”
Cameron brings your face forward, kissing your forehead to subdue you.
“You trust me, right?” His forehead presses to yours and can feel the motion of you nodding with fervor.
“I trust you. More than you will ever know”
“Then trust that I know what I’m doing,” his hands rub circles on your back to ground you.
“Okay,” your eyes squeeze tight, wanting to let him guide you.
Of course the impatient side of you was hard to control during this time. However, you know going slow is the best option for longevity.
But time seemed to drag.
Weeks.
Cameron meant it when he said he was thorough.
He wanted to know everything that made you cringe and everything that made you tick.
What made you swoon and what made you sick.
Of course in turn, you learned a lot about him and while time seemed to move excruciatingly slow, it was a time filled with knowledge and growth.
And patience.
Boy, did this teach you patience. Each time you were boiling over, Cameron decreased the heat to make you simmer down.
It was a push and pull. He’d pull you closer, making you think it was time just to push you away and keep you waiting with anticipation.
You loved it though. You were the type of sub to like the chase.
To be honest, Cameron wasn’t even doing anything inherently sexual. It was his natural dominance that had your core twisting, that had you yearning.
Like opening the car door for you, grabbing something off the top shelf, massaging your calves during movie nights.
And he was a damn good cook.
Your mind got hazy every time he’d ask you to taste test something he made. The way his hand cradled your chin when he spoon fed you the sauces he created had you ready to pounce on him.
It really was the little things that made you crave Cameron more and more everyday.
Like the late night dances in your living room where you were in nothing but your panties and one of his shirts while he just sported a pair of sweats that hung low on his hips.
And like the days he’d pick out a perfume for you that coincided with the energy your outfit was giving that day.
The foundation was coming along quite nicely, but the restless brat within you just wanted to be underneath him at his mercy.
The make out sessions continue though. Just sitting in his lap, trying to imprint the taste of him on your tongue.
“Cam, I think I’m ready.”
You couldn’t hide it anymore. This was the ultimate symbol of devotion and you have been ripping at the seams to give yourself to him.
With his forehead pressed to yours, he gives a deep chuckle that goes straight to your pussy.
“You think?” His grip on your hips gets tighter as he moves you over his hardening dick. Your eyelids get heavy, thrill filling your body.
“If you have some idea that you can handle this you better be sure. I don’t do ‘I think’,”
His right hand is quick to grab your neck, fixing your gaze so he’s looking into your eyes.
“So try again. You think you’re ready for me?”
“N-no. I know. I know I’m ready”
“Mmmm, you don’t seem too sure, baby. I don’t believe you.” He goes to remove you from his lap but your thighs tighten around his, planting you in place.
“Please. I’ll show you. Please let me show you,”
You were all about acts of service.
“You gon’ put on a show for me?”
“Yes, I wanna make you proud,” your hips buck against the hump that his dick created in his sweatpants, relishing in the stimulation.
“Shade of pink?” He breaks character to check on you, making sure you’re actually good. Using shades of pink as your safe word system.
“Bubblegum.”
Bubblegum being great! keep going!
Fuchsia being slow down / need a minute.
Magenta being full stop.
“Good girl,” His lips cover yours in a kiss that sends you in a tizzy, “Show me why you’re my Bunny.”
You’re quick to slip out of his lap and kneel on the plush carpet in front of him, your hands on his knee caps.
“You’re so fucking pretty, you know that?” A heavy breath falls from him and the worship has you leaning against his thigh to hide your eyes.
“No, noooo” he sings, picking your head up, “You don’t get to hide from me anymore. Understand?”
“Yes” A quick nod from you doesn’t satisfy him.
“Yes, what?”
“Yes, Sir.” The whine in your voice lets Cameron know you’re teetering the edge of subspace.
“You’re so good for me, baby” he leans back and your mouth salivates at just how fine this man is. Like he was etched from marble and put up in the most prestige museums.
“Now tell me what you want. Don’t hold back.”
A groan rumbles in your chest, thinking about how vulgar your desires are when it comes to him. You’ve never said any of this shit out loud.
“I want you to fuck my throat.”
He chuckles and your cheeks heat up, feeling embarrassed.
“I know that’s not it. I know just how much of a slut you want to be for me. I know you’ve got more in you than that.”
“I want to feel fear set in when my lungs need air but your dick is stuffing my mouth. I want my tears to mix with my spit while you slap it on my face. I know you care about me, but is it too much to ask for you to act like you don’t?”
“Fuck.” His breath shudders at the concept of ruining you. He’s always wanted to make love to you but there is something that started to awaken within him the more you talked about how bad you needed him to fuck you within an inch of your life.
His fingers fall beneath the band on his sweatpants to pull them down and finally release his hardened length.
Watching the way your eyes crossed sent shivers down his spine. Sure he’s been fawned over by other playmates but this was different.
This is where he wants to be. It’s where he always wanted to be.
He felt loved here and desired in a way that makes his heart skip a beat instead of making it feel like a there’s a black hole in his chest.
“Oh you’re hungry, aren’t you?”
“Yes, Sir.”
“You gonna make me proud and show me?,”
You didn’t answer and it was the only time Cameron would accept silence as an answer. Your hand immediately wraps around his leaking dick, squeezing just to see what reaction it would cause.
“You wanna play games?” Cameron bucked his hips, trying to keep his eyes straight but his head lolled slightly to the side.
“Just doing what you would call… learning what makes you tick.”
You leaned forward to lick the bead of precum that threatened to go to waste.
A moan of relief is shared upon you two.
You finally get to taste him and he finally gets to bask in that sensation.
You cover his dick with your mouth, the part of you that aims to please is feeding off of his heavy breathing.
“Oh God, Bunny!” His voice trembles while he looks down at you, swallowing as much of him as you could. He can feel how bad you’ve been wanting this with the way you’re getting sloppy. You’re savoring this as if you’ll never get to experience it again.
You’re making up for lost time and you’re doing everything you can to show him you’re worthy.
“Fuck.” you pull your mouth off him, leaning against his inner thigh while you stroke him with your hands. The sound is erotic, your hand quickly twisting and stroking your spit down his dick.
Your eyes meet his and he smirks when he sees the tears.
“You treat me so fucking good,” he wipes away a tear, “But I need more, baby. Do you think you could give me more?,”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Then move your hands.” He demanded, voice deep and leaving no room for negotiation, “Either in your lap or behind your back but you don’t get to touch me anymore.”
You whine quietly. Losing the ability to touch him for even a fraction of a second was like taking away your ability to breathe. You sadly place them in your lap and wait for further instruction.
“If you do good I just might give you what you want.”
“Please,” you huff, “Please, Sir. I’ll be good, let me prove it.”
Cameron chuckles while sitting up. His hands grab the sides of your face before licking your pouting lips and kissing you with pure ferocity.
“Shade?”
“Bubblegum.”
“Good,” he inhales sharply, “Because play time is over.”
You could practically see the switch in his eyes.
He’s here.
So is she.
“Now open your fucking mouth and show me why you’re my. fucking. Bunny.”
His fingers grip your roots tight, bringing your mouth back down on his dick. His body vibrates with a groan that comes from deep within. His hips buck up and his eyes meet yours.
He can’t get over how beautiful you look like this, eyes burning with desire for him and you just couldn’t get enough.
“You’ve always wanted to be my little slut, haven’t you, baby?”
His pace picks up when you hum an answer around his length. Your saliva painting his dick and he can’t tear his eyes away from you.
You’re addicted to him. He feels so full and heavy in your mouth, the sounds he’s making are so pretty. His jaw hangs and sweat beads on his forehead. The lack of air in your lungs was quite exhilarating actually.
All your body knew was Cameron.
Cameron is all you see. The way his stomach tightened each time you gagged on him. The way he bit his lip to try and ground himself so he doesn’t bust too quick.
Cameron is all you hear. The way he moans your name is so tantalizing. His breath hitches when your tongue swipes against his balls each time you go down.
Cameron is all you smell. The scent of his cologne is mixing with his sweat and it smells so delicious. Like an aphrodisiac, a pheromone that was sending you into heat.
Cameron is all you taste. His precum was just a tad salty and it was satiating the appetite you had for him. The flavor of his enthusiasm was filling your stomach.
Cameron is all you feel. His fingers massaging your scalp as a way to ease you. His dick filled your mouth and it was all you ever wanted. To feel him like this. To feel his body twitch for you, fighting all the alarm bells within him that say to slow down or he’ll cum just like this.
Cameron is all encompassing. Like the universe spreading far and wide. He became all you knew and more.
He yanks your head off, a large gasp coming from you as you catch your breath. Shortly after, your cries fill the room. You’re fully under for him now.
“Pleeaaaaase!,” a sob wracks your body and in the blink of an eye you’re straddling his lap and he’s rocking you.
He’s soothing you, speaking sweet nothings while his hand slips past the waistband of your shorts.
He hisses once he feels just how wet you are.
So fucking messy.
“You like being good for me? You finally got what you’ve been aching for, huh?” He’s teasing in the midst of your tears and his taunting laughter sends shivers down your spine but makes your pussy clench around his fingers.
“Yes, Sir. I love it. I’ll always be your good Bunny!”
He used one hand to grip your cheeks, to keep your face forward while he finger fucks you right in his lap. Your hands hold his shoulders tight so you don’t topple over.
“Tell me you’re mine,” his eyes roll at the pulsing of your core
“I’m yours, Sir,”
“Say it again.”
“I’m yours!”
He knew he was pulling you to the edge already.
“Say it again. Slower this time. I want to hear every fucking syllable.”
“Sir, please! I’m… I’m gonna-“
“You’re not gonna do shit unless you do what I say, Bunny. C’mon don’t be a bad girl now,”
Your noses were touching and you didn’t dare to look away from him.
“I’m.. I’m fucking yours!,” your chest was heaving, “All of me… is yours. My mind..”
Your head tried to loll to the side but Cameron wasn’t having it.
“Focus on me.” He muttered.
“My mind… my body and my soul. I am yours,” you started to grind against his fingers to help you over the edge.
“And you?,” your eyes half lidded and drool decorates your bottom lip, “You, Sir… are mine just the same.”
“Fuck,” his fingers moved faster, dipping in and out of you to rub your slick clit, giving it some attention too, “Show me.”
His lips are on yours again. The clashing of your teeth, the strings of spit and lip biting was too much in the best way possible. All of it was taking you there. Filling your bodies with a drunkenness that not even the finest liquor can bring forth.
“Mark me. Show me I’m yours. Cum for me, baby. Cmon, I know you can do it. I know just how bad you need it. Just show me. Please, baby? I need it. I need you to show m-“
He was going on a tangent. It was fulfilling to know he burns for you in the same way.
“Hhhhhhnnnn- fuuuuck!!,” you do your best to keep your gaze on him as you cum on his fingers but your eyes crossed and your body curled into him. Every nerve ending was firing off and Cameron could feel it.
“That’s my girl,”
You were trembling in his grasp while his hand ran up and down your back.
“Just breathe. You did fucking good for me. Just like I knew you would,”
“I’ll always be good for you, Sir.” your eyes were glazed over and you kept scooting closer as if you and him weren’t already chest to chest.
“Before we go on, what shade are you, baby? I need to make sure you’re good.”
“I…,” you hesitated.
“Be honest.” He implored, eyes not leaving yours so you don’t even think about lying.
“Fuchsia, but I just need some water.” A small poke of your bottom lip sends him into action.
“Go to the bedroom and I’ll be right there, okay?”
“Wanna stay with youuuuu,” you latched onto him and it filled his stomach with butterflies.
“C’mon, Bun. I won’t be long. I’ll be there before you know it”
A heart fluttering peck is placed upon your lips and he taps your ass so you get going.
The journey to your room took 30 seconds but waiting for him felt like an eternity. When he appears he has your insulated water bottle, filled with ice and your favorite flavor packet.
“Drink for me,” he kneels in front of you, hold the straw to your mouth and didn’t pull away until you told him you were good and he sets it on the nightstand.
“Bubblegum,” you nodded, reassuring that you’re ready to continue.
His calloused fingers rub up and down your thighs, just needing to feel you.
“Relax,” he instructs, “Let me take care of you.”
Cameron removes your top to expose your breasts and his mouth instantly waters. He kisses all over your chest causing your head to fall back. A sigh of relief is sent into the air.
You were self conscious about the size of your breasts and the pudge of your stomach but Cameron allowed no territory to go without attention.
Then you felt his lips wrap around your nipples. Flicking his tongue, tugging with his teeth, hollowing his cheeks to suck on the hardening buds as he switched back and forth.
“Have I told you how fucking gorgeous you are?” He whimpered, like he can’t believe he is in this position.
He’s not sure how the idiots before could fumble you but he is ever so thankful that they did.
Or else he wouldn’t be here in this moment.
He urges you to lie back so he can remove your night shorts and you swear you hear him gasp at the sight of your swollen lips, glistening with the cum he coaxed out of you on the couch.
“Fucking hell, Bunny,” his arms wrap around your thighs pulling you closer to the edge of the bed to kiss and nip at the inside of your legs.
“Feed it to me,” his voice low and stern, “I’m starving for you, Bunny. Feed me that pretty pussy, baby.”
You pull your pillows to rest them under your shoulders and head to give you a good view of him.
Your hand trembles while you reach to hold the back of his head and lift your hips up to rub your slick lips against his. He licks it off slowly, groaning at the taste of you.
He never thought he’d be here, tasting you, touching you, pleasing you.
But fuck, was he grateful.
“More,” he pleads. Who are you to deny him?
His mouth is open when you bring your hips up for him to kiss and lick. You relax your legs and his mouth is following close behind.
“That feels so fucking good,” you stare up at the ceiling, too nervous to look at him because if you look, you’ll come undone and lose it.
He was so tentative, like he was making out with your pussy. He suckled on your clit and you felt his fingers push into you once again.
“Yes!,” your back arches when you feel his fingers curl, “Fuck, baby. Right there, yes!”
You spread your legs wider and kept one hand on the back of his head while the other moved to pull and tug at your hardened nipple.
You’d never had head this good. Either guys were too selfish and never offered or they just didn’t know what the fuck they were doing, forcing you to fake an orgasm so they’d just stop.
But this? This felt too fucking good to rush.
His tongue swirled around your lips before diving into your leaking pussy, slurping on your arousal to quench his thirst.
“You taste so fucking good, Bunny. What the fuck.”
He was in awe.
“It’s all for you, Sir. All for you.”
It was almost shameful with how close you were but you couldn’t hold it anymore. It’s been years of rubbing your own clit and fucking yourself to the thought of him. You put off your orgasm for as long as you could but he knew you were almost there.
So he fingered you harder and sucked your clit just right.
“Oh God!!,” your hips rise off the bed and you push his head closer to your core to ride it out. A blistering heat wave takes over your body, you’re seeing stars and just calling for him over and over like a broken record
“God dammit,” he pulled back after licking you up all you had to give, just to see you shake in overstimulation. Smiling at the way you were breathing so hard.
“C’mere,” you mewl breathlessly. Pulling him up onto the bed, your hands framing his face to pull him in for a kiss, you both hum at the taste of you on each other’s lips.
“I’m ready,” you whimper, legs still spread wide beneath him, “I’m ready for you, Sir. I’m ready to give myself to you. Make me yours.”
He sits back on his heels to pull his shirt off, his sweats and boxers long gone and his dick seemed even harder now than before.
“You ready for me to show you how a real man takes care of his girl?” His slaps his dick against your clit making your body jolt at the contact.
“Are you ready for me to show you..,” he huffs, shaking his head with a smirk, “Just how good I can ruin you?”
“I’m ready, Sir. Please, I can take it. I can take it, I ca- Ooooooh FUCK!-“
Cameron filled you to the hilt, cutting you off and taking your breath away. His girth was delicious and his length hit spots you didn’t know could be hit.
“Are you gonna be able to take it like the slut you always wanted to be for me?” His arms frame your face and you grab onto his forearms, “I wanna ruin you so bad, Bunny. I wanna hurt you the way you need me to and make it all better. Can I do that? Will you let me do that?”
“Yes!,” you buck your hips up but he pins them down, “Please! I can take it. Let me show you. I can show you!”
“Yeah?,” he kisses your lips delicately before a sinister look makes itself a home in his eyes, “Bite the pillow if you need it. I won’t be holding back.”
Cameron was a man of his word. His grip on your hips was tight as he rolled his hips into you, building a strong pace.
His gold chains dangle in your face like you’ve dreamt of for so long, swinging back and forth like a hypnotizing pendulum.
You felt him in your stomach and he was vicious. Your wetness was spattering all over his pelvis and he couldn’t tear his eyes away.
“Where am I? Tell me, baby. Tell me where you feel me,”
“You’re soooo deeeeep!” His strokes were tear jerking and pushed every moan out. You tried to cover your mouth but he took your hand away and pinned it next to your head.
“On second thought-“ he snapped his hips, “Let me hear you.”
With his other hand, he smacks you and you call out for him. Craving more. Your body was on fire, all the sensations had you in a frenzy.
You were addicted to mixing pain and pleasure. You were his and Cameron always delivered.
“I’m gonna fucking cum already-“
“Not until I say so,” he retorts, “Just relax and take this dick, Bunny. It’s all yours now. Savor it.”
“Fuck!” You weren’t sure if you could, he was stirring you up inside and the noises of your skin slapping and wetness filled the room.
Cameron was a vocal man too. He was whimpering your name, trying to keep his composure but he was failing. He needed to let you know how good you made him feel.
Cameron was having a hard time, trying to keep his shit together. You were so fucking messy and wrapped around him like a glove. Nothing he ever imagined compared to the reality of this. Nothing compared to how fucking good you feel in real time.
“God damn, Bunny. This pussy is so good to me. She’s swallowing me right up.” He says through clenched teeth.
Your toes were curling so hard you felt they’d cramp up.
“I can’t hold it, Sir. Please, can I cum?”
“No.” He smacked you once more and your pussy pulsed around him even harder. The way he rolled his hips had him feeling every ridge within you and it was driving him insane.
You cried for him. You fucking loved being able to cry for him. You were trying to tell your body not to cum yet but his strokes were too good. With each drag of his dick against your walls you were brought closer to your climax.
His lips ghosted over yours and his stare into your eyes was serious.
“I will fuck you up if you cum without my permission, Bunny. You don’t wanna disobey me do you?”
“But I caaaaaan’t. It’s right…,” you hiccup when he hits that special spot that’s buried deep within you and you almost went against his wishes right then, “It’s right… there… and I can’t!”
“Awwwww,” he cooed, brushing a tear off your cheek, “That’s too fucking bad, isn’t it?”
His hand presses against your pelvis and you try you run away from his hands and his dick but he wasn’t having it.
“Don’t you fucking run from me.” he pulls you back and it feels like he’s even deeper, like you could feel him in your chest.
“Baby- please!,” your legs were shaking around him and your pussy just kept clenching and it was driving him up the fucking wall.
“You’re such a pretty slut when you beg. You wanna cum? Go ahead. Make me proud, Bunny. Don’t let me down.”
“Fuuuu- oh God, oh God- C..CAMERON!”
You came so loudly that he could feel your cries reverberate inside his own body. He was slapping your clit to draw out your orgasm until you clenched your legs tight.
“Oh my fucking God,”
Cameron leans back on his heels again and pulls you into his lap once again, continuing his strokes.
“You’re done when I say we’re done. I know that pussy wants more, I can feel her. I can hear her- do you hear her, Bunny?”
Cameron’s hand clamps on your mouth to quiet your whimpers so you could hear just how gushy your pussy was for him.
“I’ve got your fucking cum dripping down my balls, Bunny. You should be proud of the slut you’ve become for me.” The sounds that your bodies made between your legs has you ready to hide your face from how obscene it is.
“I know you've been wanting it, baby. To go fucking brain dead for my dick. Look at you. You look so fucking pathetic. Just look at you going dumb for the way I dig in that pussy. You like being my pathetic little slut, huh?
“No, I love it!” Your nails are digging and scraping down his chest, Cameron was getting overwhelmed. Your skin was hot against his and you were clenching so fucking tight that he was struggling to hold back his own impending climax.
“I fucking love it, Sir. I fucking love it. It’s your pussy, baby. You’re fucking me so good.”
His own head fell back, eyes closing shut tightly as you began to take over all of his senses this time.
Cameron could see all of you. The way your breast bounce with every thrust, the way your eyes fill with tears each time you look at him or he hits that sweet spot deep in your core. He can see your true self. Elated with the fact you’re trusting him enough to be vulnerable like this.
Cameron could hear you. The way you mumbled incoherent phrases as subspace took over your mind, letting your body just float in the pool of pleasure you were suspended in.
Cameron could smell you. He smells your gourmand perfume and your sweat smells so sweet. Your shampoo was his favorite aroma, because it wrapped him in a warm blanket of peace. Having you this close brought him comfort that this is where he’s supposed to be.
Cameron could taste you, your pussy juice still on his tongue and lips and when he kisses you, he can taste your mint mouthwash. You need to please is palpable and it tastes like victory.
Cameron could feel you all over him. You were creating a sticky mess between his legs and he wouldn’t have it any other way. He bites his lip at the feeling of your nipples rubbing against his chest and your pulse pounding for him beneath the hand he had on your throat.
You surrounded him like air. You were always there and he would always need you so he could breathe, to survive this world. You were his everything and he wouldn’t give this up for anything nor anyone.
It filled Cameron with pride to know that he's the one to make you fall apart. He was in seventh heaven knowing he gets to put the pieces back together when you two are done.
“You wanna cum again, don’t you? You wanna paint my dick some more?”
His hand squeezed the sides of your throat, making you dizzy but the harder it was to breathe right now, the closer your orgasm became.
“Yesyesyesyesyes!” You chanted, seeing his blissed out expression from behind your heavy eyelids.
“Bunny, baby… I’m gonna cum,”
“Fill me up… please? I deserve it. I’ve earned it. Please!”
Cam squeezes tighter and yet you still crave more. Despite his tight grip on the sides of your neck, your body melts into him.
This was the epitome of submission to him. He could deprive you of something as vital as air and you’d still meld into his grip because you trust him so deeply.
You know he wouldn’t hurt you.
But if it’s like this? The pain is welcome and it’s the catalyst for your surrender to him.
“Oh my fucking-,” he drops you flat on the mattress and his fingers weave between yours as he drives his hips hard and deeper into you.
The finish line in sight for the both of you.
He’s moving so fast that he slipped out and your gasp was big enough to suck the air out of the room.
“Give it back!,” you were full on sobbing now, “Please. Sir, give it back. Give it back, give it-“
“I’m right here, baby.” He reassures, slipping back inside and your body jerks, “Just breathe, Bunny. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”
Your nails are digging into the back of his hands the closer you get.
“Yes, yes, yes-,” you look up into his eyes and you chin trembles, “Oh God, I fucking love you.”
“Oh, I love you so much more, baby.”
Sure it’s been said before. But this time it was different.
Before, it was said as friends who hoped the other could read between the lines.
Now it’s said as two people who are growing alongside each other in a contrasting way this time. Two people who no longer have to hope for the other to pick up the hints because it’s blatant.
Just as he finished saying that, he’s spilling inside of you and it takes you over the edge, pulling him down for a kiss to hush your sobs.
“Fuck!,” his body felt like jelly as he tried to keep himself up from crushing you.
His eyes are shut tight but they open just as quick as he hears little sniffles.
“Hey. You’re okay. I got you, Bun. Just breathe with me, okay?”
His hands frame your face once more and you latch onto his wrists, to ground yourself.
“You did so fucking good, you know that? You made me so fucking proud”
“P-promise?,”
Cameron could tell it wasn’t just the subspace taking over and asking for reassurance. It was the sub that had been denied aftercare time after time. It was Y/N who feared that she’d never be good enough for anyone.
Most important of all, it was his Bunny that longed for him in silence for years because he was too much of a wimp to make the move.
“I promise. I’m here and I’m not leaving,”
Cameron gave you acetaminophen to get ahead of any post coital soreness that’ll be sure to show up in the morning and made you finish your entire bottle of ice water.
After he cleaned you up, he made sure that you peed while he turned the shower on, grabbing the towels and washcloths as the water heats up.
He turned on your favorite r&b music to relax your mind while you two showered together. He had to make sure you’re coming down safely. Letting you know that you don’t have to fear being abandoned again.
Cameron made sure to reinforce the fact that the degrading things he says during sex are purely sexual and he’d never think that of you outside of play.
He held you in his embrace under the hot stream and sang to you, giving you little kisses on your cheeks and shoulders.
“I know I’ve said it a million times but you really are beautiful.”
You tried to hide the smile that was growing but it can’t be contained. Not when he’s here, like this, so close.
After he dried you off and helped lotion you up, it was your turn to take care of him. Massaging lotion onto his back and peppering kisses on his neck and singing to him now, even if you didn’t sound as good as he did.
“How are you holding up?” The two of you lie in bed, legs tangled and finding solace in each other’s arms.
“I’m free from the cell I’ve quietly sat in for years waiting for you to find me,” your eyes look from his lips to his eyes and they’re so gentle now. So soft and kind.
“I’m sorry I didn’t find you sooner.” the back of his index finger brushes your cheek and he loves to see the smile growing on your face.
“Don’t be. I had the key the entire time.”
“It seems we both did,” he moves to kiss you once again and he smiles bashfully as if this is the first time he’s kissing you. As if he didn’t just fuck you six ways from Sunday, “I’ll never get tired of being able to do that.”
“I won’t either,” your fingers gently touch your lips like, rejoicing in this all being real.
It’s mind boggling that you’re here now.
But it’s freeing.
You are free from the abyss.
From the void that swallowed you whole every time you were done with someone who wasn’t genuine.
This feeling in your chest, it’s tranquil. Like feeling the grass beneath your feet as you prance around without bounds.
You were his and he was finally yours.
It felt good to not just be Bunny to him.
Because now?
Now you were exclusive.
He can sleep at night knowing that you’re more than just Bunny.
Because you’re his Bunny.
And that will never change.
——————
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