The Angel - Part 7
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6
It's currently 12:55pm and I know that at exactly 1:00pm Erik will pull the car off the highway, let go of my hand, turn off the car, open his door, run over to my side, open my door, lean in, unfasten my seatbelt, hold out his hand, help me stand up, rearrange his grip on my hand, walk us in ten circles around his car before helping me back into the car, and continuing on with the long drive ahead of us.
He's been doing this since 9am - to make sure his angel gets fresh air and so that her legs won't become stiff.
At exactly, 1:10pm Erik will reach behind me in the backseat (thankfully keeping his eyes on the road) and will hand me a small plastic container that holds my snack of the hour. Erik's angel is to never get hungry, he says as he places the container on my lap each time and will then replace the water bottle in my assigned cup holder. It doesn't matter if I've only taken a sip, drunk half of it, or didn't even touch it. I will get a new water bottle each hour.
I sincerely hope that he has some sort of trash can in his backseat or else we're gonna have water everywhere.
The clock on the dash just struck 1:00pm and Erik begins to go through his little routine. As he is reaching down to unfasten my seatbelt I ask, "When do you think we'll arrive at our destination, Erik?" And then I quickly add as to not give him any doubt that I want to get this day over with, "It's so nice to spend all this time with you!"
Erik holds out his hand and I quickly grasp it as he helps me stand up out of the car. "It is so nice to spend all this time with you, my Angel!" He says with a smile upon his lips as he shuts my door. "Erik must make sure his angel gets fresh air," He continues as he regains his hold on my right hand and starts leading me counterclockwise around his car, "and he cannot have her legs becoming stiff either."
I let a knowing smile grow across my lips. I so knew you were going to say that.
"To answer your question, I did the math and plotted our path last evening before picking you up and so I can say without a doubt that we will arrive at our destination at exactly 6:35pm." I had turned my head to look up at him as he finished his statement, he had his chin held high and met my eyes with a pride filled gleam in his, just waiting for me to praise him for his great work.
"You're simply wonderful, Erik." I murmured as we completed lap number three around his car and I let my gaze stray to all the cars speeding down the highway. And I thought Erik drove fast. Just as I'm about to take another step, I find that my walking buddy has decided to stop mid-step. He has one foot firmly on the asphalt and only his left heel rests on the black paved rocks in front of him. My eyes dart from his feet to his face and I see that his eyes are closed tightly and his jaw is locked. Is he...has he stopped breathing?
"Erik?" I whisper as my fingers squeeze his. Did I say something wrong?
I hear my masked companion release his breath slowly through his nose and with his mask covering 95% of his nasal cavity, the sound it makes reminds me of a young child breathing into a microphone at a school play. As his chest decompresses from holding his breath, I notice that his jaw has become slack, but his eyes still remain closed, but no longer are his eyelids tightly pressed against each other. His hand stays limp in mine.
I try to gain his attention again. Am I gonna have to call Nadir? How would I even explain this? "I'm serious Nadir, he's just frozen on the side of the road."
Again I squeeze his hand, and then take it a step further - literally. I move and place myself right in front of him and with my free hand, reach up and place it lightly on his right shoulder.
His eyes burst open and he gasps for a breath. I think I broke whatever spell he was under. "You okay?" I ask with a small tilt of my head to the side.
"I...I-I," Erik takes another deep breath, finally rights himself on the asphalt so he's standing flat on both of his feet, and manages a small nod. "E-Erik..is..okay..." He breaths out and then he begins to turn his head in all directions as if he's doing a surveillance and taking in our surroundings for the first time. I hear him clear his throat, "What lap were we on again? Forgive your Erik, Angel, for he seems to have forgotten."
Are we just going to ignore the fact that you just stood frozen like a statue for five minutes? I guess so.
I remove my hand from his shoulder and let it fall to my side. "There is nothing to forgive, Erik." I say as I move to my place beside him between the car. "We just started lap four. So counting that one, we have seven more to go."
He nods and straightens up to his full height. "Of course, Angel. It was so silly for me to forget that." He slightly tugs on my hand and takes off walking and I am helpless to follow him - I have no doubt that there would be nothing stronger in this world than Erik's hand hold. It's not tight in the slightest, but firm and unyielding. "Let's continue."
Once we have completed our laps and Erik has me safety tucked back into his car, he reaches back and places my snack of the hour in my lap. "Forgive me again," He says, "I would normally wait ten minutes before feeding you, but it appears that I have made us fall behind schedule." He completes his sentence as he exchanges a completely full, unopened water bottle for a duplicate.
I take a glance at the clock, 1:11pm. Oh yeah, we're way behind schedule.
"It's completely fine, Erik." I say as he puts the keys into the ignition and the beast of a car comes to life. "Thank you for my snack." I lift the lid to find it's a sectional container with apple slices neatly cut into bite sized pieces in one area and caramel sauce in the other. I would bet ten bucks that the sauce is homemade by him. "Nothing but the best for my Angel," I can hear the statement already in my mind and it causes me to smile.
"Of course, Angel." Erik murmurs, temporarily distracted as he quickly merges back into the quick paced traffic. "Nothing but the best for my Angel."
The statement causes me to giggle and I'm rewarded with a white flash of teeth as Erik grins. He risks a glance in my direction and his smile widens - if that's even possible - "Your laugh is music to me, Angel. I simply cannot wait for you to grace me with your voice again."
"My voice?" I ask as I pop a piece of caramel dipped apple into my mouth. "I talk all the time to you, Erik," I finish in my head.
Erik nods, eyes still on the road, but I can tell they're slightly unfocused. Please pay enough attention to at least not run off the road. "I cannot escape from your voice, Angel. The song you sung the other day when you came down from Heaven to be with me. To be my Angel...." Erik drifts off and sighs softly as if he's able to go off into dreamland. Not now, Erik! Not while you're driving!
I move my hand down to my water bottle, hoping some movement, some noise will bring him back to me and thankfully it does. "Erik hears his Angel's song all the time in his head. So beautiful. So glorious." He says as he adjusts his grip on the steering wheel, "H-He hopes....I-I hope...I hope that you'll sing for me again?"
One day, I'm going to ask about the whole referring to himself in third person thing, but today is not that day.
"Yeah, sure." I say before I pop another piece of apple into my mouth and chew slowly. Now how do I break this to him gently......? I'm not the best singer. I mean, I can get by singing to songs on the radio, but the way Erik speaks about my voice, it's as if I'm the best opera singer in the whole world.
I peep my eyes over to Erik and his expression says it all. It's as if you've just given your child the toy he's been asking for for ages. He's so close to literally vibrating in his seat with excitement, "Oh thank you, Angel! Thank you, thank-"
Erik's waterfall of gratitude is stopped short by me stuffing a piece of apple unceremoniously into his open mouth. I just need a moment to think of an excuse. "You haven't had a snack yet, Erik," I say hurriedly, "Let me share mine with you," and before he can protest I hold up another piece of apple to his lips.
He wouldn't dare refuse his Angel. He opens his mouth and I pop the piece in. "Chew slowly and carefully, now. I don't want you to choke." And I need time to think.
I remember the day I met him in the grocery store and how loudly he yelled just because I said my voice was horrible. Believe me, I do not want a repeat of that. Nadir's words creep back into my mind for the second time today - tell him what he wants to hear. "I'll sing for you." I say slowly and try to keep my voice even, "but I'm only singing for you. No one else, is that okay?" All I needed was for him to try to get me to sing in front of a crowd.
Erik swallows and nods his head, "Oh Angel..." He sighs out and he sounds so very close to tears. "No emperor ever received so fair a gift."
Again, I'm left stunned, silent, and close to tears for the second time today. I know Nadir said that it's Erik story to tell about what happened to him in Garnier Asylum, but I'm going to have to force it out of him instead. I need to know what happened to this man beside me to make him to be in such unbearable pain that he has to take the highest of pain killers - so strong that he sees Angels.
I've realized that I've been too silent for too long and I need to say something now before Erik becomes upset with my lack of communication. Just as I open to mouth to say something, anything, the phone - Erik's phone in my back pocket rings.
Saved by the bell.
"Let me grab that for us..." I mumble as I tilt my body slightly to the left to retrieve the phone and press the answer button for Nadir's call. Nadir calls every hour, but you can't time when he's going to call - the complete opposite of Erik and his schedule.
"Christine speaking, how can I help you?" I say using my best customer service voice, working at the Dollar General for the past eight years certainly gave me the experience.
"Just checking in," Nadir said, it's how he's started these conversations for the past four phone calls. "Is everything going well? Are you and Erik having fun?"
The way Nadir speaks makes me feel like there are hidden meanings behind his words. Like, "Are you and Erik having fun?" could be interpreted into "Erik hasn't done something that he shouldn't have, or has he?"
"We're having a great time," I start as I plaster a huge smile on my face. I hope he and Erik can hear the smile. "I just love spending time with Erik!" I suppose that's code for "Erik hasn't turned into Mr. Hyde."
As I finish, I place my left hand on top of Erik's right arm, which is stretched out fully to reached the steering wheel and give it a light tap. I found that if I initiate physical contact with Erik while talking to Nadir then that causes him to not mumble under his breath about possibly causing bodily harm to the "invasive Persian," as Erik so brazenly put it.
Erik still manages a small frown, but has I let my hand rest on his arm and slowly move my thumb left and right across his jacket I'm able to lift the edges of his lips to a smile.
"Good, good." Nadir says, and I can hear him give a small yawn. Erik must not let him get much sleep. Well, he did sneak out in the middle of the night to take me to Florida.
"Yeah, we're hoping to have our picnic at 6:35pm." I continue, hoping that it will please Erik to know that I remembered that detail. "I cannot wait!"
"I know that you with both have a wonderful time, Christine." Nadir gave a brief pause and then I heard him sigh, "He isn't going to like this; Christine, could you let me speak to Erik for a moment? And please, if you can, make sure he doesn't destroy the phone?"
What in the world? Destroy the phone? "O-Of course." I say, "Just a moment."
I squeeze Erik's arm that is still in my grasp to get his attention and immediately his eyes meet mine. "Nadir wishes to speak with you. Is that alright?" I ask as I hold the phone out to him and drop my hand from his right arm so that he can hold the phone.
"Yes, that is alright. Erik loves that you asked him, Angel." He says with a grin and takes the phone from my hand; as he raises it to his right ear I can notice the minuscule changes within him as he switches personas from my Erik to Nadir's Erik, and all but barks into the phone, "What do you want you insufferable Persian?"
I can hear Nadir speaking, but I can't make out what is being said, though I know it's nothing good for how tight Erik is holding on to the steering wheel with his left hand. Like before, the black leather is squeaking under the pressure and this time, I'm sure that when Erik removes his hand I'll see an indention of a five fingered grip upon the helm.
"No." Erik says with a sneer, "I don't care. Erik shan't do it."
Erik shan't do what? Why didn't Nadir tell me beforehand?
I can hear that Nadir's voice has increased over the line and I remove my eyes from Erik's hand on the wheel to his hand holding the phone - it's in a death grip. In no way am I about to doubt just how strong Erik truly is.
"Erik hates it!" He starts with a growl, "No- No, you listen- you-you-" I can't tell if he's trying to come up with an insult or if he's spiraling into a tizzy. Just as quickly as he started stuttering, he stops and takes a breath, and it's how still and relaxed that he looks that triggers something within me.
Erik is about to do something crazy; I can feel it in my blood as it runs cold. "Why don't we continue this conversation later, Nadir?" Erik says with the grace of a gentleman. I notice that he has raised his left knee up a notch so that he can brace it against the steering wheel, once he steadies the wheel he removes his left hand from the it to press a control on the side of his door - he's rolling down the window. "After we have both calmed down a bit, hmm?"
The speed at which we're going combined with the newly rolled down window makes for a harsh breeze cutting through in to the car. I can now hear Nadir yelling into the phone, no doubt that he can hear the wind through the line. "I think we both need some fresh air, eh?"
That's when it clicks. That's when all the pieces come together and I'm hit with the realization of Erik's plan.
He's going to throw the phone out of the car. He's going to throw the only thing - the only connection that I have to the real world - OUT THE WINDOW.
Just as he has begun to move his arm into a fluid motion, I find my voice, "Erik, stop!" I push myself against my seatbelt and brace my upper body against the console between our seats. I'm grasping his right shoulder with my left hand, and grappling for the phone with my right hand.
Now you would think that Erik would listen to me, right? I'm his angel after all, but no. He moves his hand holding the phone just out of reach of mine. I'm gasping for breath, trying to calm my racing heart. I can still hear Nadir still screaming into the phone. "No, Angel!" Erik says, in a high pitched voice, a voice that remines me of my little cousins when they're begging their mother for five more minutes of TV time, "Please don't make me!"
I'm between a rock and a hard place. Tell him what he wants to hear or try to force him into submission? If I tell him what he wants to hear, he's gonna throw the phone - my lifeline - out of the window to be smashed into the tiniest of pieces with my hopes and dreams quickly following. Force him to listen to me?
Well, if he's going to whine like a little kid, then I guess he's going to be treated like one. "Erik," I say pointedly, "I will not," stressing the word "not," between my teeth, "tolerate this sort of behavior from you, do you understand?" I say as I squeeze his shoulder with my left hand, not tightly, but I wanted to remind him that I'm still holding onto him.
Erik manages a small nod and flick his eyes from the road, I'm so grateful that he has been at least paying attention to the road through out this ordeal, to meet mine for a second. "But, Angel-" He begins, and I quickly cut him off, "No, 'buts,' Erik. You're going to listen to your Angel, or else I'm gonna..." I try to think on my feet, "I'm gonna have to go away. Go back up to Heaven."
"NO!" Erik's voice booms; I can feel it all the way down to my core. I'm almost thrown from my perch on the console, the seatbelt locking into place as my masked driver slams on breaks stopping us dead in the middle of our lane. Immediately, the cars behind us start swerving trying to get around us, or merge into another lane all the while honking their horns till kingdom come.
BAD IDEA. BAD IDEA. BAD IDEA. Why did I think I could do this?
My left hand is still clutching Erik's jacket, my knuckles as white as Elmer's glue. Yeah, that's gonna leave some wrinkles on the suit. "Erik, p-please," I start, my breathing becoming out uneven and barely above a whisper. "I-I need you to-to listen to me, please." I take another breath, and take a glance out the side mirror. Any minute now the cops are gonna be here, I just know it. And what in the world would I tell them?
"As long as you listen to me, Erik, I will never leave you. This is my promise." I say, regaining the balance in my voice. "Can you do that? Can you listen to me?"
Erik turns his head from looking straight ahead to meet my gaze, "Erik doesn't want his Angel to leave him." He whispers as I see tears in his eyes and notice that some have already fallen down behind the mask. "Erik will listen. Erik will-will be good."
Oh, Erik. Can my heart break for the third time today?
"Can you keep driving for me, Erik?" I say as I finally release my hold on his shoulder and right myself in the passenger seat. I'm trying to show him that I'm not asking for much. Trying to give him a simple task. "I really want to go on this picnic with you."
Without a word, Erik checks his mirrors and moves his foot from off the brake and slowly eases it onto the accelerator. Within mere seconds we're keeping pace with the other cars. Alright, step one complete.
Step two is going to be a whole lot harder. "Will you hand me the phone, Erik?"
The phone is dropped into my lap before I even finish saying his name. I can't help but stare down at it, Erik is truly worried that I'm going to leave him. Heartbreak number four coming right up. "Thank you," I say softly and pick the phone up with my right hand and raise it to my ear.
Let's hope Nadir is still on the line and if not, let's hope that he's just bought a plane ticket to Florida.
"Nadir?" I ask as I turn my head away from Erik to the side window. I feel so awful for what I had to do.
"Christine," Nadir says my name like a prayer. "Thank you. I will forever be in your debt for this."
"Yeah, you will." I say before I can bite my tongue to hold the comment in.
"I'm not going to allow Erik to take you anywhere again, alright? If you decide to still meet with him after this - and I don't blame you if you don't," Nadir quickly adds, "I'll arrange for all the meetings to be at my house and you won't be alone with him for a single moment."
I don't think I can escape from this rabbit hole that I've agreed to be thrown into.
"Of course," I say offhandedly, trying not to give anything of what is being said to Erik. "Is it alright if we end our call, Nadir?" I turn my head and steal a glance at Erik, it's as if he's been turned to stone - not daring to move anything but his hands on the wheel, and only enough then to keep us in the lane. "I really would like to spend the rest of my drive with Erik, and Erik alone."
Erik, I didn't want to upset you.
"Of course," Nadir parrots, "Christine, I heard what you told him and I'm going to need you to use that your advantage, okay?
"'Kay." I say as I move my eyes from Erik to my shoes. Could I have not picked a cleaner pair?
"You have to make sure he takes his medicine. That's what Erik got mad about; I should have warned you and I apologize." I heard him sigh, "I thought that since he was with you, then he wouldn't cause a scene, but I was wrong."
"Cool beans." I mumble into the line.
"It's important that he takes his pills, Christine. If he doesn't take them when scheduled and the medicine starts to leave from his bloodstream then...."
"Uhh, okay, well..." I trail off. When did Erik have to take his pills? What were the signs that the medicine was being depleted from his system?
"He should have already taken them," Nadir says, as if he's read my mind. "Two pills, every six hours. I don't know what he has done with them - the bottle is gone, so I'm hoping that he's carrying them."
"'Kay, 'Kay."
My mind is a whirlwind trying to process everything. I know Erik and Nadir are friends, Nadir is Erik's doctor. But why does Erik hate the medical practitioner side of his friend? It didn't sound like he did before when I "broke my wing."
"Sounds good, Nadir." I say, "And, please don't call again. We'll call you if we need you, okay?"
I hope I'm making the right choice.
"Christine, if I don't hear anything by 8:00pm, I will call; do you understand?" Nadir's voice leaving no room to argue.
"Yeppers, bye now." I say as nonchalantly as I can and end the call. I let the phone fall back into my lap and lean my head back onto the headrest of the seat. "Erik, you do know what I have to ask of you, don't you?" I whisper out as I shut my eyes. I do not want to have this conversation.
"Y-Yes." Erik speaks, but I can just barely hear him.
"When we pull over next, will you take your medicine for me?"
"Yes," He answers obediently, but I can tell that he would absolutely say no if he could.
"Thank you," I say and then hold out my left hand, palm up to him. Trying to extend an olive branch here. "Hold my hand, please?"
We hold hands and ride in silence until 2:00pm; Erik pulls over and starts to do his routine, but when he holds his hand out to help me out of the car I notice that it's trembling. I quickly graze my eyes over the rest of the figure and and see that Erik, in all his entirety, is shaking like a leaf.
"Oh, Erik," I say as I take his hand and then give it a tug. He falls to his knees without hesitation. That was not the plan, I wanted him to take a seat on the foot rest of the car. "Your suit is going to get dirty." I say and give his fingers that rest in mine a squeeze.
"It's of little importance, Angel." Erik whispers as he rests his eyes on my shoes.
I let out a small sigh. May as well get this over with. "Erik, your pills..." I start, and then decided to go down a different path. "Your pills. Why do you not want to take them?"
Erik releases my hand and keeps his eyes still on my shoes. "Erik knows he needs to take them..." He mumbles, and I can see his hands that are placed on the foot rest of the car twitch. His eyes dart to mine and then back to his shoes and then back again. He's asking for something, but I have no idea what. I give him a small nod, maybe he needs some sort of encouragement.
He moves his hands from their perch on the car to my shoes. He begins to untie them - what in the world do you think you're doing, sir? But as he works on getting the knots undone, he starts talking again. "When Erik was away, they made him take pills. Lots of pills."
Away? Does he mean the asylum?
Erik worked at the knot on my right shoe and finally got it unlaced, before starting on the left one. "And when Erik wouldn't take his pills, bad things happened to him."
That explains it. Erik has a lot of bad memories associated with pills.
"Do you know, Angel, that when Nadir first prescribed me these pills to take at the beginning of the month that he had to sedate me in order for me to swallow those pesky things?" He asked as he finished unlacing my left shoe and then when back to my right shoe and began tying it back up. I knew he wasn't looking for me to answer, and so I remind quiet. "That was one of the easiest ways for them to get me to take them," I can hear the venom drip from his words when "them," is mentioned. "Being sedated is fine under normal circumstances for Erik, but with them, it's a completely different game."
Erik has tied a perfect bow on my right shoe and moves to do the same to my left. "If I didn't give them the option of sedation - if I was too quick for them. Well..." For the first time since Erik has started his story, he looks up to meet my eyes, "Let's say that those were quite shocking times for Erik, hmm?"
I didn't know what he meant by that. I didn't know how far to read into his words.
I reach out and place my right hand on his left shoulder, "Erik, I would never do anything like that to hurt you. I hope that you can believe me on this." I run my thumb back and forth across his jacket, "I need you to take them, though, okay? These pills help with your pain, right?" I ask gently.
He manages a nod, but I can still feel him slightly trembling under my hand. "Erik doesn't feel pain anymore." He whispers out through his teeth, "But he can still feel the memories."
Cue heartbreak number five.
"What can I do to help you, Erik? What can I do to help you take your pills?"
His eyes meet mine and we hold each others gaze for a minute. I'm not sure what he's searching for, but he seems to have found whatever it is as he removes my hand from his shoulder, holds its in his left hand, stands, and then helps me out of the car. "Will you stay with me?" He whispers as he leads me to the trunk and pops the latch.
"Of course." I vow as I watch him lift the hatch up and my eyes widen seeing everything he packed. Three suitcases, one duffle bag, two small travel bags, and a black wicker picnic basket. I try to think positively - like Erik wasn't going to kidnap me - and think that maybe he just likes to be prepared for anything.
I watch as Erik leans down and unzips one of the travel bags, when he opens it, it's filled to the brim with different types of pills bottles. There are some that I recognize as he digs through the bag: Advil, Tylenol, Bayer, Mucinex and, Melatonin to name a few, but there are other orange bottles that I can tell were prescribed to him.
He finally finds the bottle he was looking for and straightens up to his full height. As he is unscrewing the lid with his left hand, I notice that there is still a slight tremble in them. "Let me," I murmur as I remove the bottle from his grasp. "Nadir said two pills, every six hours. So, since it's two o'clock now, the next time we need to take these will be eight o'clock."
"My Angel is so very smart." Erik says softly as he looks down at me, eyes flooded with adoration and pride. His intense gaze makes me advert my eyes down and I focus on that task of nocking two pills out of the bottle into my palm. "Alright, Erik," I begin and I hold my right hand out to him, "Do you want to take them one at a time, or do you think you can swallow them both at the same time?" As I finish asking the question, I recap the bottle and place it back into the travel bag.
Erik reaches with his left hand and takes the pills from me, "Same time." He said, and then took a deep breath, shut his eyes, and raised his hand to his mouth. "Whoa! Whoa!" I gasped out as I took hold of his arm with my left hand and covered my right hand with his left - stopping it's process to his lips. "Erik, we have to get you some water to take with these!"
I bring his hand back down between us, and once I'm sure he's going to keep it there, "Be right back," I say as I rush over to the passenger side of the car for my water bottle. When I circle back to face him, I'm met with his confused expression. "What's wrong?" I ask as I uncap the lid.
"Why water?" He asks as he tilts his head to the left slightly. "Why does Erik need water to take pills?"
Now it's my turn to be bewildered. "That's what you do, Erik." I say with a little shrug, "That's what everyone does when they have to swallow a pill. Even me."
Oh, please don't say that they didn't let him do this at the asylum.
He shook his head, "Erik... he didn't...they didn't..." He said fumbling over his words, but I understood immediately what he was getting at. I place my left hand over his still holding the pills. "Let me-let me show you." I say thinking on the fly and I glance down at the opened travel bag.
I let my eyes travel over the different pill bottles, "Angel, that isn't necessary." I shake my head as I listen to him and pluck a small green bottle out from the bag - Vitamin A. "Yes, it is Erik. I need to take these pills to be honest with you." I say as I show him the bottle and then uncap the lid. "I take them every day at home. It's so great that you brought extra."
Okay, maybe I don't take them everyday. Or even every other day. But, I do take them - when I remember.
I place the water bottle down in the truck so that I have two hands to use to get the Vitamin A pill out and once it's in my left palm, I exchange the pill container for the water bottle. "So, I go ahead and place the pill on my tongue, take a sip of water, and then swallow."
I watch as Erik's eyes move from the pill in my hand, to the water bottle, and then finally up to my eyes. "Just watch," I say and then go through the process of taking the pill. "The water helps a lot with getting the pill down," I say after the pill is safety down my throat.
I hold out the water bottle and tilt my head up to look at him, "Do you think you can do it?"
Instead of verbally answering me, I feel Erik's fingers of his right hand curl around mine and take the water bottle out from my grasp. He looks down at the pills in his left hand and then back to the water bottle. I see his lips move, but he's speaking so softly that I can't make out what he's saying. He finally looks up from his hands, "Just watch." He parrots and then copies my movements of taking a pill.
He removes the water bottle from his lips and I've noticed that he's shut his eyes. "It's alright, Erik." I whisper, "Nothing is going to hurt you here."
Finally I see his Adam's apple bob up and down meaning that he's swallowed his pills. Erik lets out breath and then gasps for another. "Erik..did..it.."
"You did, Erik!" I praise and take the bottle from his hands, capping the lid and placing it down in the truck, I turn and face him once more. "I'm so proud of you!"
I even go as far as stepping closer and giving him a hug. It takes him a moment to respond, but soon he's wrapped his arms tightly around me. "Erik did it." He says once more, his voice slightly raspy. I know he's on the verge of tears again and it only makes me want to told him tighter.
We stay holding onto each other for a while, neither one of us wanting to let the other go, but alas, we do have a picnic to attend. And my feet were falling asleep.
"Erik," I start, my voice slightly muffled by his shirt.
"Hmm?" Erik hums in questions.
"I think it's time for our laps and snack." I say as I tilt back slightly to look up at him. "What say you?"
Erik smiles down at me and then slowly releases me from his arms. "I say that you're right, my Angel."
Once Erik has repacked the trunk, he leads me around the car to get our laps in and then when we're situated back in the car he retrieves my new water bottle and snack of the hour - baby carrots.
"Here's to Florida!" I say as I hand him a carrot and grab one for myself.
"Here, here!" Erik says graciously and pops it into his mouth and I copy him.
Glancing at the clock I see that it's 2:38pm. I move my eyes back up to look out the passenger window and say a small prayer in my mind: Please don't let the sunset until we get to Florida.
I wouldn't be able to stand it if my heart broke for another time today.
