the way sangwoo views sex is so intriguing to me. he honestly isn't as sexually driven as most people seem to assume he is. rather, he's focused on what sex represents to him. he uses it as a way to feel in control and secure with himself. after bum kills jieun, sangwoo fucks him as a way to establish that despite bum gaining some power over someone in a way, sangwoo is still above him. when sangwoo refuses to suck dick, that's not just him trying to dodge the gay allegations. rather, doing so would be putting himself in a position of submission, and therefore making himself weak.
meanwhile, bum is absolutely seeking a more traditional sexual relationship and is unaware of sangwoo's perspective.
i hate how people talk about him calling bum mom during sex because everyone just sees it as a kinky thing and ignores the fact that the whole chapter is like a waking ptsd nightmare. leading up to that, there's so many parallels between bum and eunseo. he's wearing her old apron, he asks to call sangwoo by the same romantic nickname eunseo used to use on him, and other subtle things that would tie the two together.
leading up to this, sangwoo has been going THROUGH IT thinking about his childhood in general and why his life led up to this point. a lot of this centers around his mom. his childhood was full of emotional incest, sexual abuse, witnessing domestic violence, and just general awful treatment from his mother who he cared too much about to refuse.
because sangwoo has been tweaking for days over this, he insists on not making eye contact while he has sex with yoon bum. not only that, but just not seeing his face whatsoever. people normally say that's also because he's dodging the gay allegations, but it's because bum looks like his mom. sangwoo wants to have sex in order to establish some sort of control and feel in power over the idea of his mother. but bum switches to a position where he is on top of sangwoo, the same position he was in when his mom sexually assaulted him.
so when he calls bum mom, it's because sangwoo is now in a position of submission. he's scared. the only person who was ever able to force him into that mindset was his mother. since then, he's been so adamant on avoiding that feeling that he'd kill and torture people solely to remind himself he isn't weak.
