Love Without Labels

LGBTQ+ Group Facilitator that uses SKAM & other Qmedia to teach Empathy, Resilience, & Compassion to Y/A, their parents, & their teachers.

[yourmomwatchesskam]

I’m a little late- but I just wanted to say that most of us bawled our eyes out watching the date clip.. just hearing the word bisexual being used w/in that context-- the fear about the pressure of having to “pick sides.” A glimpse into what internalized biphobia feels like, w/o having to romanticize or demonize it. Wow Druck did THAT.

[yourmomwatchesskam]

henlo are u there ? skam france just dropped their trailer and the main is toffany,,, and she’s prego !

yes just watched the trailer & was definitely surprised by Tiffany being a main. I think it’s a topic that needs some attention & hopefully it’s handled well.

[yourmomwatchesskam]

are u watching druck and skam espana too

whoa it’s been a minute but yes we watched the latest season of skam España & also watching the current season of druck. Haven’t been posting much bc most of my group lives in the US & we’re going through stuff here lol but will definitely post more about Druck soon

[yourmomwatchesskam]

I’m happy for K. Do you know how many people never admit to shit like that out loud set other people? I like that she’s being honest and how she doesn’t want to be like her parents. None of us want to end up like our parents better that close minded. Like you said some of our families believe what they believe.

I’m not disagreeing with that. It takes real courage to stand up to our fam/friends that stay the same while we change. I’m not stealing that moment from her, bc it’s important that ppl know that even though your parents are stuck in their own way of thinking, that you have the capacity to change. Whether or not that’s supported is a whole other topic. & so far we don’t know what her parents’ response is going to be to their daughter dating a poc from an urban neighborhood, so let’s wait for the clips.

[yourmomwatchesskam]

did they think they did smth because it almost coulda worked until she said you people again to jas. I’m-

I believe the overall intention of what they’re trying to highlight here was good. The only concern is that they’re putting her on the mental illness spectrum-- which unfortunately can be misunderstood that bc there’s a mental health issue it somehow permits the underlying xenophobia in the way she speaks to moyo/jasmina when she starts ‘freaking out’ when thinking/talking abt drugs.

She didn’t say anything along those lines abt Senne or the other girls when they were talking abt casually using/buying it, so the discrimination is purposefully shown.

But, she did say that her parents think the same way & she doesn’t want to be like her parents. I guess that’s the good news, as we all know many parents who can be homophobic/xenophobic etc & their kids grow up & decide they don’t want to be like their parents.

So I guess the concern would be.. can the series tell the story of xenophobia without linking it to mental illness as the cause, & will the audience be able to differentiate between the two as well..

[yourmomwatchesskam]

(tw/cw)

what possible redemption arc can be used for this... 

it’s evident now what they are trying to do.. as in, to say that not all racism is blatantly obvious & some of it stems from irrational fears due to stereotyping of past experiences etc etc etc.... but this might be a dangerous approach in 2020 in the middle of literal protests/riots going on around the world. I am hoping they handle this super well... although I’m not sure how.. bc even if her brother overdosed & she now hates all ‘drugs/drug dealers (anyone who uses/sells etc)’ or something along the lines of that... it’s still going to be hard to have him forgive her with the “we’re not all like that” theme.......

bc selling drugs for many people is not a first choice either. Not that I’m defending that, but then they need to address poverty, economy, & privilage-- which I’m not sure that skam has the range to do that.. & not that skam doesn’t have the capacity to do so... I know they have in many ways in other seasons/episodes/remakes, but we’d need another 10 wks to delve into those topics.

Just my 2 cents..

[yourmomwatchesskam]

I am watching respectfully.. but don’t understand.. Someone tell me something- theories.. anything. lol

[yourmomwatchesskam]

mentally I am here..

[yourmomwatchesskam]

there is a screenshot of ur post on twitter abt gameboys and the director even commented. Tysm for praising it! It really good

when I tell you I cried watching that reaction video.. I’m still glad she sent it to me though. the group loved it & there’s no other series addressing those topics ‘real-time’ during the pandemic, about the pandemic like they did. I hope the writer etc wins some kind of award for that series. 

[yourmomwatchesskam]

season of you

I created a Y/A group inspired by SKAM after realizing they lacked the support system they needed. The support they were getting from ppl they met online was much more than they got at home or from irl friends.

In one of our recent mtgs, I asked where everyone was getting their inspiration from lately & one of them said “season of You.” She said that his music & wisdom helps her understand herself better & makes the hard times feel/seem easier bc she feels less alone.

Twitter has been her safe space, but said that lately it’s been a little “chaotic.” It’s hard to have one of the only places that is sacred for you become the place you feel like you (sometimes) have to avoid bc it makes you feel worse, instead of better.

So I wrote this for her for encouragement. I tried to take her feelings & put them into words.. & make them rhyme 😆

She asked me to share it during her break, so here I am.. sharing this for any other SOY streaming/supporting enthusiasts that might need encouragement when there are times that your place of solace feels a little “chaotic.”

[yourmomwatchesskam]

so glad this season is over and hope for a better season 7. It wasn’t terrible but the writing was just-

Can I just genuinely ask what was so bad about this season? Maybe I’m out of the loop right now but one of my closest friends struggled with addiction right after high school & it took years to recover.. & it’s messy.. & it hurts-- everyone. & it’s a process coupled with progress- there is no perfection here. Please tell me what I’m missing about Lola. Not to mention, it’s the 1st wlw season (outside of a s3 remake) with an original storyline.

If we’re not talking about Lola as the main, I definitely understand about Daphne not getting more recovery spotlight aside from “my boyfriend comes over to cook me dinner & everything is ok.” Bc it often doesn’t work that way. Perhaps for Daphne it did.. but either way we won’t know bc as far as we were told, Vilde & Even are on the NRK blocklist for character remakes by Julie.. So if you’re also upset bc of the way a lot of Eliott’s story wasn’t throughly told bc we don’t know what transpired btwn him & Lucas bts, that also makes sense.. but how much more can we possibly get without having his POV? I wanted an Even remake just like everyone else that feels like he deserves to be more than just a side character, & I can tell you I never get over Eliott’s POV from how he explained his BPD.... or how Lucile shared her POV of going through the motions of loving someone & losing them at the same time-- but still being willing to help Lucas bc she knew the one thing they had in common was loving Eliott. So if you’re glad the season’s over bc of you feel like your fave chars weren’t given the chance to tell their stories-- welcome to skam.

Zoe’s character in skam NL is literally telling a story of her getting s/a in one of the most intense s2 assault scenes........ & they cx it. Can you imagine being a 16-18 y/o girl, brand new to skam.. then watching it, without any conflict resolution... & then going about your day? Like what about Robbe’s dad, is he ok? Or Arthur’s dad, is he in jail? Or David’s teacher, did he get fired or get some sensitivity training to not deadname trans students? 

I’m not using this to undermine underwritten characters or character development in Lola’s season, I’m just saying bc POV is always & only with the main, we don’t know what happens. & honestly, I’m ok with that bc if the alternative to that is having a youtube vlog where Even gets interviewed about his BPD & S/A... no thanks. Sorry for the rant.. but, Lola’s story about teen addiction was much needed in the skam world. Sorry you don’t agree.

[yourmomwatchesskam]

I’m low key kinda bothered by the way some fans are talking about the writing of season 6. I’ve never related more to a character then I do Lola. No shade to og but I love her 👉👈

I think they’re referring to Eliott & Lucas having a problem that would've been beneficial to have more dialogue between them but bc it’s Lola’s POV, they couldn’t do that.. not that the writing was bad.. or at least, that’s how I perceived those tweets from people that were upset.

I think Lola’s character was so well-written. The same way I feel that Eliott embodied BPD, I think Lola did the same with addiction. The highs & lows, the coping mechanisms, the need to escape, the need to be loved, the need to push people away that love them the most bc they’re afraid of losing them... I don’t know how anyone can think that you’re shading OG when there wasn’t even a season about addiction in OG- not that it should matter.. bc if you felt represented in Lola.. finally finding a skam character that you could relate to & felt represented by, that’s all that matters. & now with s7 & 8 confirmed, I’m hoping that representation expands even more.

[yourmomwatchesskam]

they have a child doing coke,, what was the reason

look at skam france letting the world know that there are, in fact, teenagers that are addicts in recovery. & I get it.. every time there’s something sensitive or triggering like - sex scenes s3 (always), dialogue about eating disorders s2/s6, sexual assault s2, physical abuse s5, & now drug addiction s6, it might be difficult for us to watch because of how it personally affects us according to our beliefs &/or experiences with these things.. & I’m so glad that people exist that don’t know any minors that are addicts in recovery.. but some of us have. 

& Eliott immediately connected to Lola knowing very well he felt the same way about Lucille telling him to stop smoking/drinking because of how it effects him when he’s in a manic state. Please let the uncomfortable stories be told too. We don’t often talk about them bc of that, which just adds more stigma & shame to drug use & why addicts tend to get dehumanized in today’s society. 

I’m pretty sure that might be the reason..

[yourmomwatchesskam]

it’s important that parents are present in remakes where it’s culturally appropriate.. but it’s also good that it’s shown that just bc you are a parent, it doesn’t necessarily mean you have it all together- even if it appears that way to others.. That ‘respect your elders’ concept is pointless to a child that feels abandoned by the parent she wants nothing more than to feel connected to..  & all he could do was shove a bunch a cash in her hand, bc he doesn’t know that she’s a recovering addict & that was the worst thing he could’ve done after sending greetings to her mom & telling her to never come back. 

[yourmomwatchesskam]

Hi sorry about not responding to asks.. & happy belated pride month but if you are lgbtq+ & reside in the USA- there are 2 upcoming chats today.

2pm EST on twitter w/ the ht #b4stage4chat

& 6pm EST virtual group (Register, HERE.)

[yourmomwatchesskam]

Seems to me that they don't hesitate to sometimes dumb their characters down to facilitate the storytelling, like everyone is oblivious to sth that happens right under their noses so that only one character notices and it fits the story. This looks a bit like lazy writing sometimes.

I’m not disagreeing with that entirely.. but the only reason I can’t fully agree is bc this theme is present in skam & every single remake. I’m not sure if that has to do with the fact that they’re insinuating that teens are in their own worlds & don’t see what’s right in front of them, or that teens do see, & are unsure how to have uncomfortable conversations. Anytime we try to help people that don’t want help, it feels hurtful & could even be harmful.. but if we do nothing, sometimes we risk much more. It’s such a hard position to be in.

-every noora confronts every vilde about their potential ED, bc she recognizes the behavior & calls her out on it— but essentially does nothing. We don’t know if she ever follows up bc we no longer have her POV in other seasons. Mia (druck) was the only char to go in depth about her ED about how she went to therapy for it. Eleanora also briefly talked about her abandonment issues & the role they played in her ED. But skam france is going in. When Lola pulled out that last bag...............

I think that without the lack of paying attention to detail or the lack of comfortability to have awkward conversations, skam itself would cease to exist. Could some of these stories be better told in a way that shows that there are *some friends that do notice the details & have the grace to gently (or abruptly) intervene when somethings really wrong? Definitely. But then it wouldn’t be skam.

[yourmomwatchesskam]

Exactly. Love the season so far but wish there was more of the gang in the clips

Daphne was just portioning her food.. left the table.. & then came back with chewing gum. Not that the gang isn’t important, but....... wasn’t focused too much on them in this last clip.

Also, even though Lola felt betrayed by Daphne telling their parents about her & getting her sent away to that hospital, she might have to put herself in Daphne’s shoes about how she’s going to handle her sister’s possible ED. It’s interesting that Lola could see right through her while ‘the gang’ has no clue. Her bf is literally sitting right across from her.. But, if you don’t know, you don’t know. & I’m not saying that as if they’re at fault for not knowing, I’m just saying that it’ll be interesting to see what role they’ll play in supporting her & her recovery (if what’s being insinuated is actually happening.)