Zack the Wretched @zackthewretched - Tumblr Blog

BPD isn’t just the stigmas.

BPD is depression with no release. Months of constant numbness. Followed by bouts of extreme anger and malace. Followed by instant regret and then numbness.

BPD is our constant urge to harm, deprecate, destroy, eradicate ourselves. Every morning is a constant need to have too much sex or get addicted to some new drug. We know it’s bad for us - hell, we purposefully do it because it makes us FEEL something.

Remember when I said constant numbness? BPD is constant risk taking. If it might fuck me up, I’m all in. I NEED to be all in - it’s the only way I’ll feel. Just so we don’t feel numb again.

BPD is a constant push and pull. “I love you” or “I hate you”. We only see black and white. Either you’re all in or you fold. You are either my best friend or my sworn enemy. But, of course, tomorrow you’ll be the complete opposite.

BPD IS CONSTANT.

We don’t just suddenly not have mental issues. We don’t just suddenly wise up one day and realize “holy shit, maybe I shouldn’t drown myself in alcohol or smoke a 12 pack of cigarettes a day!!” We don’t wake up and say, “crap, I’ve been doing it all wrong!!”

No. This is us. In all our masochistic, unrealistic, confusing glory. You either take us or leave us. There is no in between.

flyngdream

happyasingay

Truth is...

I still keep that message you sent me on here when we first really got together before everything started to fade. I look at it when I'm down and I miss you.

ancxious

just-shower-thoughts

It’s strange how humans find some carcasses mouthwatering and some others nauseating

amelia-rayshen

To everyone who needs this tonight

You are strong and you are beautiful and you will get through this. Keep your chin up and fight on.

okcold-deactivated20190629

king-for-a-weekend

The Amity Affliction - R.I.P. Bon

unreactive

Fucking space..

It honestly makes me mad I was born in a generation where we probably won’t learn what’s on other planets in other galaxies. Nor will generations after us. I was born at the wrong time. We need a Christopher Columbus of space!!! And I volunteer to be shot off into space and unlock these questions or die trying. Most likely die. So I then suggest that we build a ship like in the movie Wall-e and shoot that off into space. Generations later they will reach another solar system and learn the secrets of it. Seriously we should shoot little societies off in space in wall-e ships and see where they end up. We aren’t gonna learn anything sitting on earth. We need to explore.