hey!! i've been thinking about a specific kyman scenario that i wanted to share here. i lowkey suck at speaking english so sorry if there are terrible grammar mistakes teehe. also, it's not really organized because i literally thought of this at 3 am last night, this is just me vomiting words.
⚠️ WARNING ⚠️: it has a little of nsfw. nothing explicit really because it isn't even important, but if you're uncomfortable with please be mindful of that. also, if you don't like or hate kyman, please don't read. just scroll past this.
ok so !! a highschool au where the boys are in the last year of highschool, and they start thinking about college and their adult lives. it's cartman's last year in south park bc he already decided to move out to another place (far away, i don't really know abt us states but you go imagine some place far from colorado). he applied to a prestigious college and he actually got accepted, so it's a huge opportunity for him. although there is another reason for him to leave south park apart from the fact that he doesn't like the town; and that is kyle. he's been in love with him for years now and he knows kyle would never like him back, so he wants to leave all his feelings behind and have a fresh start. he wants to forget kyle, or at least all the years he spent yearning for him.
the guys know, not about his massive crush on kyle of course, but about him moving out. at fist kyle thought that he would finally be free from cartman for good, and he didn't even have to do anything at all! but, the more the year progresses, the nature of their relationship changes. maybe it's because eric wants kyle to at least have a few good memories of him before he leaves, or maybe it's because deep down kyle can't imagine what his life without cartman would be. he isn't accustomed to not have cartman around, and he doesn't know what future holds for him (i imagine kyle would go to a college near south park, let's say it exists because i need it for the plot), so he's actually a little scared to lose his friends... even cartman. whatever the reason is, they start to grow closer. they start going out more (as friends, of course), they hang at each other's houses, they start laughing a lot more, and even though they can't stop fighting for absolutely everything, they find they start enjoying the fighting too (more like kyle finds out, eric has always enjoyed them in his own way).
kyle knew there was good in eric after all. he had lost hope at some point on trying to fix him, but he found that they could actually get along and they had a lot more in common than he realized. he remembered that there were some rare occasions in his childhood when cartman wasn't antagonizing him and they were actually on the same team. he remembered how fun it was back then, and he actually missed it. it was really fun. though weird, eric understood him in a way that kenny and even stan couldn't. it really was weird, but he was sure it was the same for eric too.
at some point in the year, this change in their relationship got kyle doing a lot of thinking. some random night, after a day spent laughing, arguing and playing videogames with eric, kyle came to the conclusion that he actually liked eric. he freaked out and was weird for a week or so, being especially weird with cartman. after a lot more of thinking, he got his head around the idea that he liked cartman, and wasn't as freaked out and weird anymore. he realized that this wasn't really news to him, he'd been obsessed with eric since they were kids, always trying to make him change for the better or trying to stop his schemes when he didn't really had to. he just never though much about it because it was "the right thing to do", but it all made so much more sense now. he wasn't telling anybody, though. not even stan. never.
so, the year goes by and he doesn't say a word and never acts on it. it would be stupid since eric's moving out in a week so whatever. the four boys decide to spend that last week together in a sort of farewell to eric. they have a really good time together laughing, having sleepovers and doing dumb and dangerous things together like when they were kids. everything is like the old times and there are no worries, no pressure, no uncertainty, no anxiety... just them being kids all over again.
the night before eric's trip arrives. he's leaving early in the morning and kenny, stan and kyle had already said their goodbyes to him. kyle is having dinner, but he can't stop thinking about eric leaving. he's leaving for who-knows how long to a really far distance from colorado... and, hell, he'd probably not come back anymore because, who would want to come back to fucking south park? the little, boring and stupid town that caused trouble to anyone living there? eric would probably start a new life, meet new people, far from anyone he knew before, he'll probably fall in love with someone else and make a good life away from everything and everyone. all of it while kyle is still in colorado and being miserable, probably.
that's when kyle can't take it anymore and when his family is asleep, he sneaks out from his house and goes to eric's. he climbs up to his window (just like eric did a lot of times when they were younger, entering to kyle's bedroom unannounced) and knocks lightly. eric was already in bed and was really confused when he saw kyle outside but opened the window for him anyway and helped him into his bedroom. they sit in eric's bed and the brunette looks at kyle for a few seconds before speaking.
"what are you doing here?" he asks.
kyle doesn't answer immediately, but looks around the room that was only illuminated by the rays of the moon entering from the same window kyle climbed. he sees eric's suitcase and various boxes with almost every decoration of the room inside them. he notices how the bedroom he knew for practically all his life and that was witness of so much memories was now cold, lifeless and felt strange and unknown. he feels his stomach sink uncomfortably and it's all he needs to muster up the courage to look eric in the eye and say "i wanted to see you." with the most sincere expression in his face.
eric tries (and fails) to suppress the blush that spread through his cheeks, and coughs to cover it up.
"you saw me yesterday." he replies, and kyle rolls his eyes. he doesn't appreciate being questioned because he feels exposed.
"yes, but you leave tomorrow morning and i don't know if i will be awake to see you go."
eric shrugs it off and they start chatting, laying on his bed, looking at the ceiling. they talk about everything, but mostly about memories together. they laugh together at some of them, and fight about other ones because they really can't stop arguing and antagonizing each other. the only difference is that now fighting seems more fun and friendly than before, and they both enjoy teasing the other and rile each other up. at some point they stop talking and enjoy the silence for a little bit and maybe it's the fact that it's kind of late and he's nostalgic, but kyle breaks the comfortable silence, whispering;
"even though i hate you with all my heart.." that was a lie. this year they grew closer and kyle realized not only that he liked eric, but that he actually never really hated him. "... i'm gonna miss you, man."
eric huffs a laugh. if kyle could be sincere with him, he could too.
"i hate you too." he lies. "but i'll miss you." they fall in silence again, and now is eric's turn to break it, feeling specially sincere that night. "hey," he starts. "remember that time when you moved to san fransisco?" he doesn't wait for an answer before speaking again. "that made me realize that nothing was the same without you... it wasn't as fun as before." he moved his head to look at kyle, who was already looking at him. fuck he thought. he looks beautiful. before embarrassing himself, he continued speaking, looking at kyle. "i can't believe i'm telling you this because i thought i would take this secret to my grave but... i did a plan to bring you back here. with butters, i mean. we did a plan to bring you back."
"really?" he asked, his green eyes gleaming.
eric explained him everything they (he) did and didn't miss any crazy detail. he told him everything they went through just to bring him back, and added that trying to replace him with butters ended up being more boring than originally planned. soon, he had kyle laughing at the anecdote. he couldn't believe eric did that for him, the ridiculousness of the situation and the fact that eric tried to replace him with butters of all people. and okay, fuck, kyle was beautiful laughing like that, eric couldn't hide his own smile.
kyle stops laughing and looks at eric, smiling at him. every coherent thought left his brain instantly, so he simply exhales and closes the distance between them, giving eric a short peck on the lips.
he immediately flinches and almost falls out of the bed with how quick he distanced himself. he blushes and starts frantically apologizing to eric, saying that it was an accident, that it was inappropriate and blah blah blah.
"shut up." says eric, grabbing kyle's cheeks with one hand, managing to make the ginger stop taking. he copies kyle's action, and gives him another chaste and short kiss. he stops squeezing kyle's cheeks and they separate again. they lock eyes for a few seconds before leaning in again and now kissing properly.
they make out for a while, one thing leading to another and well... they are boy. hormonal boys. i don't imagine that they fuck, i think they just masturbate together or maybe give the other a bj but you know what? i'll leave it up to you. you can even pretend this didn't happen. when they finish cleaning up (lazily, because eric doesn't want to be apart from kyle) they fall asleep together.
a few hours after, lianne knocks on eric's door and tells him that breakfast is ready. kyle and eric wake up and eric tells lianne that he would be downstairs in a minute. they look at each other in silence for a few minutes, kyle looking pensive and eric too sleepy to say anything.
that's when kyle has an idea, and he starts stripping eric off his shirt. eric starts panicking and tries to keep his shirt on. "wait, kahl." he says. "last night was great but i really need to go now."
kyle rolls his eyes and shuts him up with a kiss. one kiss becomes two, and three and four. kyle presses their foreheads together, eric looking confused but willing.
"i'm not going to do anything, dumbass." he explains, putting some distance between them. "i just want to keep your shirt."
"no." eric declines. "no way, this is one of my favorite shirts."
"i know." kyle replies, matter-of-factly. "that's the point. i will keep your favorite shirt so you have a reason to come back."
eric smiles at him, and concedes. "don't get too comfortable with it jew." he says, tossing the shirt at him, and searching in his suitcase for another shirt. "i will come back to get it."
they share a last kiss before lianne yells from the kitchen that the breakfast was getting cold. eric helps kyle get out from the same window and watches him go back to his house.
a few minutes later, eric and lianne are carrying the boxes and the suitcase in lianne's car. kyle couldn't go back to sleep, so he's watching them from his own bedroom. he watches as they get inside the car and how lianne starts driving, the car becoming smaller in the distance. he looks down at the shirt in his hands and clutches it. he wanted to put it on, but it had eric's smell on it and he didn't want it to disappear so soon. that shirt represented the promise that, some day, eric and kyle would see each other again.
AND THAT'S ALL!!!! well not all all. in my original idea they see each other again but many years later. eric comes back to south park and kyle has the old shirt forgotten in the back of his closet. he has a girlfriend now and they've been going out for a few years now. after eric left, stan kenny and kyle's friendship wasn't the same, they stopped seeing each other frequently and became good acquittanances (i hate that word) but do not fear because when eric comes back they start rebuilding their broship. the only thing that doesn't go back to normal is that now kyle has to fight his demons (bisexuality) and realize all over again that he's still in love with eric. he has a whole conflict with himself because he made a life without eric and now he has feelings for him again but he feels abandoned !! and also he is in a long-term relationship and he's happy !! but he hasn't talked to eric in years (let's say he changed his number or stopped reaching out at some point or whatever) and even if they spent YEARS apart, kyle had always had eric present in the back of his mind in some way or another (in the form of a shirt that has been forgotten) and now eric is back and his whole world and everything he constructed without him is upside down !!! but don't worry they figure it out and they end up together. this is not the official ending because this might as well end when eric leaves and have an open ending or it can end with eric not leaving, or him coming back as soon as possible, there's so many options... i'll leave it up to you, i like a little bit of drama and angst so i thought really quick about that last part that's why it is not as developed as the rest of the idea but !!!! who knows who knows everything is possible.
i just wanted to share my thoughts here because it's been DAYS and i can't get them off my head, it has been a while since i had kyman brainrot and now it came back at full force. blame the not suitable for children special for that (ik it didn't have kyman but it had eric and i love that little bastard so it all started with the eric cartman worms for brain and now here we are)
ANYWAYS I'M RAMBLING SORRY I LOVE TALKING hope you liked this any suggestions thoughts and or comments you may have are totally welcome !! have a nice day / night depending on when you are reading this hehe 🫶🫶
