zenna

NO UNSOLICITED M34NSP0

[zennamianna]

ABT ME ｡⁠*⁠♡ ✧⁠*⁠。

name: zenna

age: 20

height: 6ft

sw: 225lbs

ugw: 135lbs

cw (as of this post): 199.8lbs

I'm back!! I've been on here awhile but I rarely post. I'll start to post diaries and various other things <3

[tutu233322]

Reminder that you have to be in shorts and bikinis in 6 months sooooo

[zennamianna]

FYI:

- food is not the only source of fun

- food is not a reward.. ur not a dog

- food is not the only way to socialize

- food will not keep u happy, being thin will

stop making excuses!!

[guiltygirl]

someone: hey do you wanna hang out

me: i can’t bro i’m uglier than usual today

[sissyzzz]

. ݁𖦹₊ ~THINSP♡ de comparacion

[bowthing]

good for you? i don’t understand people who feel the need to shame others who have an 3d.

they act like our mentality is by choice. we are sick not only physically but mentally as well. we can’t control our mindset.

[zennamianna]

How do u handle ur ed at work?

I almost passed out at work today and had to be sent home and I have to work A LOT this weekend and I'm scared it's gonna happen again :( I love my job but I don't want something to happen.

I tried eating before going to work and equaling out how many c4ls on average I burn at work to the amount of c4ls I ate before going in today.

How do y'all not pass out at work while still catering to ur 3d?

[zennamianna]

🩷 6.26.2024🩷

I had the worst day.... I almost passed out while training a new hire at work and had to go home and I didn't wanna go to the hospital so I went home and kind of binged (1,400 cal but still a lot) then I purg3d for the time in years to get it out and I couldn't even get all of it out... and I'm too weak to go for a walk in the Texas heat :/ I managed to get some exercise at work tho before going home. I'm so fucking tired and exhausted and weak I hate this

> Lose It! Log <

[zennamianna]

🩷 6.25.2024🩷

back at it again with the ed :p

I kinda stopped caring abt my eating and my weight for a little bit, I was still eating less like at most 1,500 cal a day but a few binges here and there. I thought I was recovering but it was just my fat self trying to ruin everything. I didn't lose any weight over this time but also didn't gain which is awesome. but I'm back I wanna lose as much weight as possible for my bday next Friday:)

I went grocery shopping and got a ton of low cal foods today so it'll be easier. It's so hard to restrict when all the food in ur house is fatty high cal foods :/ I still avoid it but I hate that it's my only option. Anyway, at the store I got my favorite yogurt, halo top (chocolate and strawberry), fiber 1 brownies, white cheddar rice cakes, diet dr pepper, and 0 cal sweet tea.

I don't have work today so I don't think I'll be burning a lot of calories so I'm not eating a lot today, just wanted to try the Halo Top. Idk what ppl are on when they say it's ass, it's so fire!! the strawberry is my favorite!!

> FOOD <

B: ---

L: ---

D: Halo Top (90 cal)

S: ---

> WORKOUTS <

none

> INTAKE: 90 cal

> BURNED: ---

> NET: 90 cal

[zennamianna]

tfw u binge but still lose weight is heavenly 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

[zennamianna]

non-food related hang out ideas!!

- library

- shopping center/mall

- go to the park (could also go for a walk)

- gym

- drive around

- go to ur house or friend's house

- take a class together (yoga, pottery, ect.)

- walk around a city

- study

- volunteer

- watch movies/shows

- play videogames

- online or window shopping

comment anymore ideas :)

[zennamianna]

tfw ur bfs mom recognizes the wl 💝💝

[zennamianna]

I got a job!!!!!

I can buy all the safe foods, diet sodas, 0 cal energy drinks, go to gyms and rec centers I want without asking my bf for money and him getting concerned!!

[zennamianna]

I'm meeting up with some friends from inpatient tonight and they've decided on Olive Garden 😭😭 BUT I can get a low cal soup and a salad with low fat dressing 🩷 it all works out.

The downside tho is they know I have disordered eating (literally met them at the mental hospital lmao) so I'm scared they're gonna like point something out. And my one of them is paying for me so I'm also worried they'll order something for me to eat and put me on the spot. That would be a horrible nightmare. But I miss them a lot and I don't wanna ruin the vibe but cancelling.

[zennamianna]

WHY DO I KEEP EATING!!!!!

but everytime I'm with my friends I feel slightly safe from my thoughts so I eat then regret it sooo much later. I wanna stop hanging out with them cuz of this but I feel so evil for even thinking that, I love my friends so dearly.... I hate myself sm.

[addicted2skinny2]

All I want is to be loved [and to be underweight]

[zennamianna]

my bpd ass

[immolationx]

favorite activity is yapping on tumblr about how fat i am then sleeping for 15 hours