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wallacepolsom

★

roma★
Not today Justin
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
occasionally subtle
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

JBB: An Artblog!

izzy's playlists!

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Peter Solarz
sheepfilms

Love Begins
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
tumblr dot com
Sweet Seals For You, Always
YOU ARE THE REASON
d e v o n
noise dept.

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@zodiac--muses
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"... there are always good moments in every situation. So, yeah. Even a pessimist like me can see that." he brushes some of his hair out of his face as she mentions their trip to the dark realm in a short time. "I mean. There's good even in that, right? Even in everything going wrong, you can see some good in it. You have to. Otherwise, you just kind of... find no reason to continue doing it."
"Well, sure." She hums, tapping her fingers softly. Watching him for a moment, "Like... the outcome will be good, ideally. Someone will probably make a terrible joke that makes at least some of us laugh. Stuff like that right?"
A light shrug, "Even knowing that, I know it's gonna suck? Y'know?"
"Mm." he hums noncommittally. ( truth be told, it didn't bother him much in the emotional way. it was just factually annoying to sit through this much and only be able to alter very tiny, seemingly 'inconsequential' events that do nothing to overall alter the way this story ends. so much for the hero that people think he is or can be. ) "Happy? Plenty. In terms of things right now, or... like, in general? Because then my answer may change."
Meanwhile, Helia, having so many feelings and opinions always. Which Lex is likely aware of. Or he should be, by this point. "Hmm... Your choice? As long as it's actually happy or silly. Y'know? Something that'll give us a giggle or something. Though I can't really imagine there's much happy things right now, given. yknow. Our upcoming Super Hell Trip." There's a light smile, trying to make light of something that she's pretty certain is gonna suck.
"..." his expression is some unreadable mix of worry, consideration, sorrow and ... almost pity? though it's hard to tell what the intent is, if only for a moment as he shrugs, looking away. "I don't, really. Been through too many. I mean, I remember everything ... linearly in a way of speaking. It's like overlapping a still frame on a video game or an animation storyboard to simulate the look of a repetition. I remember the day I first met Viv' the actual first time, and also the first day I met Viv' now. But she only knows 'this' first time. She only knows that I knew things about her that only family would know, or that her co-workers have speculated already. I don't think about it much anymore."
She waits, letting him have that moment, listening when he talks about it all. "That... does sound like it sucks pretty majorly."
Moving to sit, next to him or otherwise. "I can imagine why you wouldn't want to think about it too much. Seems awfully sad t'me?... So, is there anything happy rattling around in that brain of yours? Something silly?"
"It isn't good for any mortal," he speaks it so casually - less like an experience, of course, and much more like a theory he's toyed with for quite some time. "and I would imagine even those who aren't have some... interesting... reactions if they were to remember. And besides, if anybody wants to force admin access on your memories, it's not like you don't know a few highly magical healers, like myself. I'm sure it shouldn't be that hard to drag you back from literal death."
"Noooo, really Lex?" The sarcasm is so thick, played up with a little grin at him. "And, ideally, I'd like to not reach that point! I can't imagine I know anything important enough from past loops, for someone to want to do that to me?... Do not tell me if I do, I'm just gonna be mad about it. Probably."
Silence for a beat "... How do you deal with it all?"
@zodiac--muses - helia.
"Moderation isn't a thing any of you guys consider anymore, huh? The concept of having repeated this set of decades and not remembering it messing with you that badly?" his words are factual, despite their vague, thinly veiled tilt of concern. "Hey, the bright side is that you don't remember. You know?"
"When have we even been normal about anything?" There's the attempt at a joke there, probably. She seems tired. "It's just... I hate the idea that I've been here so many times before, making the same mistakes, unable to change that because I can't remember, yknow?"
Helia puffs her cheeks out slightly, "I know it wouldn't be great for me, mentally, to remember all that. Most likely. But it doesn't stop that feeling?"
I miss a life I never had. The everything I could've been...
People need your help. If you can help them, why say no?
Darien Gautier
“I wish I had a chance to say goodbye to everyone. To Skordo. To Gabrielle. Gods, I'll miss them. But most of all, The Vestige. I don't know if they'll understand how much they truly meant to me. Perhaps we'll see each other again, in another place, another time. I probably won't be the version of myself that's writing these words, though. That me will be gone. I can live with that.”
I really adore seeing people do extremely cool stuff with how dark the origins of the Vestige are
You are violently murdered for no reason and your soul sacrificed to Molag Bal. A daedric Animus takes your form and manages to do it perfectly, a rare feat creating a perfect Vestige. Most of the soul shriven are imperfect vestiges, just mindless shuffling husks. It replicates your memories and knowledge to the point it feels like it is you, but You are gone. You can die and reform due to the nature of a daedric animus being unable to truly die*. You Have No Soul. You Are Not You.
How do you go about your life as this? Convinced yourself that you Are you, but you're not. You're a perfect copy. Do your friends accept you as you? Are they weirded out by you? Do people mourn you while you stand in front of them convinced you're still alive?
Somewhere out there, Tamriel's most powerful necromancer has your corpse. What is he doing with it? Was it discarded without care, or does it serve him personally? You can't do anything about this.
And then you Do recover your soul, at long last, but the body is still not yours. You're inhabiting the body of a stranger that knows you Perfectly. Now go on and live your life, Vestige.
Ithelia
Art for The Elder Scrolls: Online
*Artist Unknown* If you know comment below
⚰️ F A R G R A V E, a demiplane of Oblivion containing a city. The plane serves as both a crossroad and a neutral ground for Daedra to congregate together, under the watch of the Grasp of the Stricture.
Prince Ithelia
"We learned that every Ithelia is dangerous, a broken creature that ends up hunted. We cannot change who we are.
But mortals? You choose your paths. You don't need the powers of a Daedric Prince to alter your fate. I envy this. Goodbye, pathwalker."
So what if I 'came back wrong'?
I came back, didn't I?
Gold Road cinematic trailer - Ithelia & the chaos.
I hate when tall people say "walk with me" because they always start making these long ass strides and expect me to keep up. Like do you see my size??? Do I look like Jack you fucking beanstalk???