Written in the Stars 🌟🌛🌞 @zodiacsignsprobably - Tumblr Blog

Scorpio: I know it's not thier fault... but I wish they would die

*After an argument*

Taurus: *making the signs lunches*

Taurus: This was not made with love today, just so you know

Virgo: You're so hot!

Scorpio: can you please stop talking to your soup like that

Gemini: I don't gossip, I deliver news.

Gemini: Will you date me? Breathe if yes, recite the bible in Japanese if no.

Scorpio: And then god said “omae wa mou shindeiru” and then moses answered “nani??”

Magician: And now for my next trick

Taurus: *whispering* please make Leo disappear PLEASE make Leo disappear

Virgo: When I die I want Aquarius and Scorpio to lower me into my grave, so they can let me down one last time.

Libra: But who’s gonna be in charge when you’re gone?

Aries: Taurus will be in charge

Libra: Okay see, I can hear you saying words but it’s like they don’t match up in a way that makes sense. Did you have a stroke?

Capricorn, singing randomly: Country roaaaaaads

Sagittarius, joining: Take me hooooome

Capricorn: If you insist

Sagittarius: I bel- wait what- oh my god

Sagittarius: That’s the dumbest pickup line ever

Libra: Go to the person you think is the most attractive

Capricorn *smiles*: Leo...

Leo *blushing*: Yes, Capricorn?

Capricorn: You're blocking the mirror can you please move so I can see myself

Leo: ...

*Eating Cookies*

Aquarius: Did you make these yourself?

Taurus: I went to target myself

Virgo: What's the worst date you've been on?

Gemini: I don't know, it's a 50 way tie. The last person I went out with started crying when I told them I was a Gemini.

Scorpio: I'd rather die

Pisces: ...than?

Scorpio: No, that's it

Virgo: If I cut my leg off and swing it at your head am I hitting you or kicking you?

Gemini: You'll probably end up mentally scaring me more than anything.

Taurus: There’s no I in team, but there is an I in pizza.

Aquarius: So you won’t share.

Taurus: *hugs pizza box* No, I won’t. *obnoxiously shoves pizza mockingly into mouth*

Texting my mom about my horoscope 😂

(She's a Leo btw... I feel like that is vital information for this post) 😂

How would your parents or friends respond to this?

I hope you and your family all recover 💕

Thank you so much this was so sweet to read 💕 We're all healing 😊

Written in the Stars 🌟🌛🌞