awful pretty @zzvrr - Tumblr Blog

I try to kill the time until I can take another risk To feel alive

Trying to stop giving a fuck but losing 4+ years of work is devastating. Nothing feels worthwhile of my time anymore.

#Every single one of my DAW files were completely nuked.#Nothing left but the shittiest clips of mp3s sent elsewhere #Really this was the only thing I ever cared about #And I can’t even have that #Inb4 advice: went through every possible data recovery process short of getting the US government involved. There’s nothing. It's gone

thisshitaintnothintomeman

ill shoot just about anybody for just about any reason. i just love killing. i love killing people! i fucking love it man

anarchycatss

jamabushi

prowl-autism-extraordinaire

babyfiendco

𝖇𝖆𝖇𝖞 𝖋𝖎𝖊𝖓𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖑𝖑𝖆𝖗 created by Abel Emmanuel

ace-trainer-alice

But, why do you fantasize about being broken?

Is it that you crave the escape of an ending? It doesn't take much to leap from the window of a burning building. A clean break lets it heal better. In high school, a migraine with aura was a rare break for me, so I looked forward to the pain. It's all so loud, so overwhelming, so much. To be broken is to finally escape.

Or do you yearn for what comes after? To be broken down into nothing and rebuilt. Rendered into a possession and taken care of as one. Do you pick your tormentors by their empathy? Do you crave fingers that will take you apart with love? Truly is there anything more intimate than destruction.

Or is it the legibility that destruction brings? Don't you ever wish the things wrong with you were more obvious? You won't take pain meds because you're not sure you really need them. You find yourself putting off appointments because right now it's still livable. You can still put one foot in front of the other. The idea of the world seeing you break is electric.

Or is it something else? A blend of all three? Why is it? Tell me. I wish for nothing more than to know.