YAYYY IM SO GLAD SOMEONE ELSE LIKES PLURAL ASYA... i'd love to hear more about your hc if you're willing to share 🥺
honestly i feel like i already said everything i could say about it in my previous ask but it's still a very dear hc to me and easily one of the most relatable depictions of how it feels like having a dissociative disorder personally... oh asya my asya
can you elaborate on your system asya hc i am so curious
hi hi i am so glad you asked.... i have alot of thoughts about asya having a dissociative disorder.
first and foremost the one thing you can notice about asya right away is how dettached she is from her surroundings, she often spaces out and spends most of her time in hew own head out of touch with whatever is going on, which isn't inherently dissociative per say but common with dissociative experiences, i find her delayed responses to everything very relatable...
the other one is that she frequently experiences dissociative flashbacks and, getting stuck in her own mind on a single thought that haunts her, making her completly shut off from her surroundings, which is a frequent experience for anyone that has any dissociative disorders (she also has obvious memory issues that can't be attributed to normal forgetting)
these are just the generalized dissociative symptoms i think she has, but the big ones are probably how disorganized her thoughts are, her narration frequently contradicts itself and interrupts itself mid thoughts and makes circles within itself and spirals, i think this is the big one, you can probably understand it as many things, but to me i feel like it is a sign of her being blended or hijacked, i don't actually think she switches frequently, but her alters, who have vastly different priorties from her are constantly affecting her thoughts and actions without her realizing it or even knowing that she has these shifts at all
the scene right after vadim invites her to the movies is probably the most clearcut example of this.
this is something that's constant in her narration, once i started rereading to pinpoint these moments i realized they happen nearly nonstop, her spiraling with self hatred out of nowhere when it goes against her view of the world and makes her be "selfish", her lashing out in moments she really didn't intend to or notice, it's everywhere.
speaking of her self hatred, i strongly believe it's an alter of it's own, not only does she admit more than once it goes against her belief that the world would ever priortize or care for someone like her, but her self loathing spirals almost always are intrusive and sudden, really making me believe those feelings are an alter of their own made to hold the parts of herself she despites and desire self annihilation, she is simply so blended with them in times of high stress they may look like the same person, but she seems to have little control or say on how and when those spirals happen, making me believe as such.
i also believe she has a child alter who holds the memories of her times with tosya and the car repair shop incident, and an agressive and apathetic protector alter that shows up when the fear of said child is activated, or asya is otherwise threatened, but that's more getting into the weeds of it.
(i also like to imagine the character descriptions on the game's page was written by said protector, it's cute)
you probably are wondering why i didn't bring up tosya until now, surprising right? most people who believe in this hc believe in tosya also being an alter, but i don't agree with this at all, i think tosya really is what she says she is, an imaginary friend willed into existence by a lonely child begging for company, i think other alters may have some traits of hers or look up to her, but i personally prefer tosya as a representative of everything asya idealized and wished for, making the ending much more sweet that way, i don't feel the need to explain away the supernatural aspects of her existence with "real" phenomenoms, she works the way she is and i like her for it.
anyways, thank you for listening!! i have alot to say about this headcanon as it means alot to me as someone who is very dissociative but is woefully unaware of the inner workings of my own mind so seeing another character present the way i do makes me very happy even if entirely unintentional, sometimes you really do feel like you're just one guy inspite of proof otherwise.
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