highlights from the show!!
so we get there around 4:30
we start talking w the people i mentioned earlier and we ended up becoming amazing friends
BIANCA IS SO FUCKING SWEET, she was like “is this your first time seeing me?” and when i said yes she said “oh warning you now i can be a nasty bitch” and it was great i love her so much
we went to a sports bar (w/ new friends) since we still had like two and a half hours before the show actually started
miss kasha davis opened up the show and KILLED it
then bianca came and OH MY GOD
she said how she wanted to start the show earlier but her dick got caught in a zipper (ouch)
she also commented on how her outfit (sequined clown jumpsuit) looked like a vagina
she talked about her best friend (first of 13 that she mentioned, i counted) who had down syndrome and she also mentioned how whenever she says something that makes people uncomfortable, she would just randomly spit out a fun fact
she talked about how she hated f****ts and it was absolutely hilarious
“FUN FACT! gay men have sex because they like it. straight women have sex because they like jewelry.”
she proceeded to talk about how pussies scare her, and when she started yelling about it through the mic, she was making DIRECT EYE CONTACT with me the WHOLE TIME and at the end she was like “THERES NO FUN FACT FOR THIS ONE BITCH” and i was D Y I N G
i think at this point she was around her fourth or fifth “my best friend”
she picked on a straight couple from the audience (who was sitting behind us) and a lesbian couple from further back
she picked on the “woman with the white jacket” in the expensive seating on the side
THERE WAS A WOMAN IN THE FRONT ROW WHO TURNED 79 LAST NIGHT AND IT WAS SO FUCKING ICONIC
there was also a woman a row ahead of me (i was third row) and she made supportive comments n shit every now and then and bianca LOVED it, it was so great
she also caught someone in a shitty seat filming when you weren’t allowed to take pics or videos during the show and roasted the HELL out of that person
she made a couple of abortion jokes, like how her friend got an abortion and she was really really supportive but then bianca remembered she locked her keys in her car and... i’m gonna leave the rest to your imagination
she made a joke abt her lesbian best friend (i think this was the 11th bff?) dave and how dry her pussy was
she trashed yvie oddly for not wanting to take pictures with her fans after she won her season and made a good point abt how her fame isn’t gonna last forever
she was like “i dont wanna get political but a few years ago this country fucked up” (starting to sound like she was sad) and then yelled “LETTING RUPAUL PICK AQUARIA” or some shit like that
“fun fact! i dont have any more.”
the first one she got was “why are you such a hateful bitch? love you obviously”
SOMEONE HAD A PICTURE OF HER PET SNAIL AND SAID SHE NAMED IT BIANCA SHELL RIO AND IT WAS SO FUCKING FUNNY
a 13-year-old girl in the front row asked how much duct tape she has to use and at first bianca was like “ok youre 13 i dont wanna respond” and everyone was like “DO IT” so she made a joke abt her mom having a loose pussy, 10/10
and then the video came! basically we were the last question and she had us come up on stage, and she called me a cunt and it was ICONIC
“is this your daughter? oh. so someone fucked you...”
my mom: “i have three!” bianca: “three fingers or three children?”
this one guy in the side area who looked really unhappy got invited up on stage and roasted. his name’s kevin.