Happy Birthday Charlie Manson!

Wishing the best to the worst.

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Donald Trump!

Trump is proof that all it takes to become wealthy in America is to be born that way. He’s also proof that if you have money and talk about how great you are constantly, people will believe you. This possibly makes him the greatest Rapper ever, an even greater accomplishment considering nothing he says makes a lick of sense, let alone rhyme.

Currently the republican candidate as the 45th (and potentially final) President of the United States of America, he has brought the American people together on a platform of bigotry, hate, and ignorance.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Roosh V!

Born Daryush Valizadeh, Mr V is a blogger and “pickup artist” who has written about how to have sex with women all around the world. Immature at best, but what’s truly put him in the asshole category is his anti-feminist, misogynistic, and homophobic viewpoints, and the gatherings he organized around the world (Women and Homosexuals need not apply) to promote his “philosophy”.

Pro Tip: If you’re going to write articles condoning rape which you’ll then claim were only satirical, maybe don’t pick a nickname that sounds like a date-rape drug. 

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Jeffrey Dahmer!

Jeffrey Dahmer was a serial killer operating primarily in Milwaukee (which is Algonquin for “The Good Land”) from 1978 to his arrest in 1991.

Jeffrey killed 17 men and boys, most of whom he also raped either before or after. Even this got boring though so he turned, like many a bored housewife before him, to arts and crafts, preserving body parts of his victims as mementos and even eating some of them.

His most famous little experiments though were his attempts to turn his victims into zombie slaves by drilling into their skulls while they were alive and pouring acid into their brains.

Me, I paint model aircraft.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Pol Pot!

What is it with communism and horrific dictatorships, eh? Pol Pot rose to power as leader of the Khmer Rouge (Coolest sounding despotic death group?) within cambodia. His reign was relatively short, lasting only four years, but in that time he was still able to kill between 1-3 million of his 8 million subjects.

All of that is par for the course with these kinds of guys, the most interesting thing about him: He chose the name Pol Pot over his birth Name “Saloth Sar”. Now THAT’S a dictator’s name! If he’d kept it I’m sure he’d still be in power today as supreme leader of Earth.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Jim Jones!

King of the Koolaid, Jones was a quasi-religious political leader who tried to set up a communist utopia in South America. 

Throughout the 60′s and 70′s his “People’s Temple” built power and wealth in the United States and eventually managed to set up a commune on land they bought in Guyana. They called this camp “Jonestown”. Jones built a cult of personality around himself, and eventually the population grew to nearly a thousand members.

Faced with criticism from former members and the families of current Jonestown residents still in the U.S. including claims of abduction and brainwashing, Jones mental health deteriorated. In 1978 he led over 900 members in a mass suicide by poisoning. Over 300 were children.

Wiki Page

(Incorrectly posted this in April, sorry for the mistake)

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Josef Fritzl!

Josef became world renown as a DIY guru, building a hidden cellar under his home consisting of a bathroom, kitchen and sleeping area. Unlike most, who would use this as a kick-ass man-cave for hanging with friends or as a last refuge against the End Times, Josef used it to imprison his teenage daughter.

Over 24 years he physically and sexually assaulted her, leading to the birth of several children some of whom he kept imprisoned with their mother and others he raised with his wife as his own. 

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Saddam Hussein!

The man the Kim dynasty wish they could be, Saddam was President of Iraq from 1979 to 2003. During this time he lived the tyrant’s dream, oppressing his own people, building a cult of personality (and all accompanying statues of himself) and using his country’s position as a major oil producer to generally dick about with near impunity.

Ironically his regime came to an end at the hands of a borderline illegal war waged in the wake of the 9/11 attacks and some completely trumped up charges of hiding weapons of mass destruction. After hiding out in a hole for a while he was captured and went through a short trial, then an even shorter drop attached to a rope.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Oliver Cromwell!

Oliver Cromwell may be one of the best liked sociopaths in history. A religious zealot, he overthrew the british Monarchy in 1649 and eventually became Lord Protector” of Britain until his death in 1658.

During this time he was responsible for conquering the Irish, bringing them under British rule in a campaign so brutal it is considered almost genocidal. His policies, and those that came afterwards, set the trend of oppression and persecution the Irish would face for hundreds of years after.

In 2002 he was voted one of “The 10 Greatest Britons” by the British public.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Kim Il Sung!

The first of the Kim Dynasty who rose to power in North Korea after WWII. He led the country in it’s attempted invasion of South Korea, with China’s reluctant backing. Even after this failed attempt at reunification he remained leader of North Korea for decades, building up a cult of personality deifying himself as an immortal “Supreme Leader” who would lead his countrymen to greatness.

In reality his people lived in abject poverty under a totalitarian regime that continues to this day under his grandson.

Wiki Page

(Sorry for the late post, technical hiccup)

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Max Clifford!

Clifford was one of Britain’s top publicity agents for over three decades. He had many high profile celebrities and politicians as clients, and specialised in creating or hiding personas based on sex, drugs, and other seedy elements.

In 2013 he was arrested as part of Operation Yewtree for sexual offences against children and young women spanning the whole of his career. Despite claiming innocence to this day, he was convicted of eight counts of indecent assault, and has since been accused of another which is awaiting trial.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Martin Shkreli!

Hiked the price of life saving medication by over 5000% from $13.50 to $750 per pill.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martin_Shkreli

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Rolf Harris!

Australian born musician, artist and television host who became something of a national treasure in the UK in a career lasting over 50 years. Harris was arrested, tried, and convicted on 12 counts of sexual assault against young women aged between 8-19, at various points over his long career.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Adolf Eichmann!

The man charged with organising the mass extermination of Jews was unfortunately stereotypical in his attention to detail and efficiency. When they say “the trains in Nazi Germany always ran on time” this is the guy largely responsible for making that happen.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday John Wayne Gacy!

This guy’s definitely got IT! “The Killer Clown” earned his title over 6 years where he killed at least 33 men and teenage boys at his home by either kidnapping or luring them in before strangling them.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Josef Mengele!

Mengele can consider himself the basis for the trope of the “Evil Nazi Scientist”. He was responsible for not only the deaths of millions in the gas chambers, but the inhumane experimentation he performed. He was a leading member of staff at the infamous Auschwitz concentration camp in Poland.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Rupert Murdoch!

Rupert, or “Keith” to his mates (Nobody calls him Keith), owns and runs some of the largest and least respected “news” organisations on earth.

Building his empire from the 1960’s, it was in the 80’s that Murdoch figured he could boost sales and viewing figures by switching from the traditional news model of relaying information to the public, to editorialising shaping the news to fit his own agenda and building massive political power as his fortune soared.

He somehow escaped unscathed from the revelation and subsequent investigations into his UK newspapers hacking the phones of public and private citizens, including the Royal Family.

Wiki Page

[12-11-1934]

Happy Birthday Osama Bin Laden!

Bin Laden became the poster-boy for terrorism after organising and carrying out the September 11th attacks in 2001. Active and wanted by the U.S. since the Clinton administration, George Bush spent 8 years looking in all the wrong places before Barack Obama finally brought him down. Permanently.

Wiki Page