Gooday! I pray none of you are nobles, because I swear on my last sack of oats I am not paying tax just for speaking in this cursed place. I’ve already paid enough this week! For windows, for salt, and even for being unbetrothed.
Anyway. Since everyone is introducing themselves… here I am.
And before anyone starts whispering, I am a woman, yes. A fair maiden, I'd prefer. But I am NOT a witch.
However, if you behave suspiciously, rest assured I will sniff it out. I have an excellent eye for witches. I’ve found at least seven in my village! Three didn’t even know they were witches until I informed them. They’re welcome, truly.
I’m a simple-minded peasant woman. Give me a roof that doesn't leak, women neighbours who can't read, and a granary full of fresh, beautiful oats, and I can live happily enough. As long as no one sends rats into my house. I fear rats. And I fear plague.
I do hope this Officialverse lot is kinder than my village. Heaven knows I endure enough misery as it is. The least I deserve are decent neighbors
Not witches, not nobles, and absolutely not oat stealers.
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