Last night I woke up, periodically, and wrote this. Sorry it's long, and no I was not on drugs.
It starts in a meeting room, where a wizard named Bob and a business woman named Konvict are arguing over who gets to buy Publix, but suddenly they start singing, a medley of James Bond themes, but very seriously, this makes them fall in love. Two years later, Bob is now a buissness man, and Konvict is a witch, who wants to buy Little Debbie instead of Publix now for no reason, but it is an entire song. They decide that they should put on a show with their neighbors, and they base it off of an Encyclopedia, with 666 pages, and each page as a song. They get their neighbors to join in, and then the show happens with all of it's numbers, but after preforming 666 songs, they sumon a demon, who misinterpreted it as a summoning. The demon, sends them into the labrynth from Greek Mythology, and they sing like 999999999 songs in there, all of them being Doo Wops, with really bad violin. Then when they make it out, they are in the Gateway Arch, and a random emotional number happens where Konvict and Bob break up. I would like to point out the entire show is serious as a documetery. Then they all sword fight on top of the Effiel Tower, and it ends with Bob dating Little Debbie, and Konvict dating Chester Cheetah, and Little Debbie and Chester Cheetah are dating behind their backs, and Bob turns into Leonardo Di Vinci and paints the Mona Lisa for no reason, and winks at the audience (or screen). End of act one. Act two starts as a courtroom drama about how Little Debbie (the mascot of the brand of the same name) had murdered like 27 people and she was on trial, but it turns out she can control anything that happens in bakeries, and the courtroom was a bakery for some reason. Then it cuts to the present, where now Konvict and Bob are back together, Little Debbie and Chester Cheetah are not mentioned anymore, and the Mona Lisa thing had no importance. Now Konvict buys the death star off of Temu and it turns out it's just a giant criossount and it blows up in the sky. Now Bob goes on a skiing trip and sings a Medley of every song ever featured in Stranger Things, and accidentally summons Pan from Greek Myths, but Pan just dies on the spot, and The Dude Who Was Skiing With Bob (that's his name, he was not skiing with Bob) takes off his mask and reveals himself to be Percy Jackson. Konvict and Bob teleport into each other's places for no reason, and Konvict fights Percy Jackson, but now they're in a Toys R Us. Bob (now at home) eats the sun, but Bob becomes the new sun and flies to where the sun belongs. Back to the Toys R Us, where Percy Jackson insists he is technically "off duty" because he was just there for a cameo that got out of hand, when Bob/the sun shines through, all the toys become sentient for 0.4 of a second, afterwards all they do is hum ABBA songs. Konvict realizes the emotional arc is colasping, so to calm herself down she recites all the Greek gods, deities, titans, heroes, monsters, and all other mythological figures as a song. Suddenly the Toys R Us turns folds into itself and turns into the courtroom from the begining of act two, and it turns out most of act two was non-canon, and the trial goes on with no one remembering Debbie controling the bakery, or the interuption. End of act 2. Then a potato with a smiley face performs polka in morse code for 50 hours straight. End of act 3.
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