shawty imma party till the sundown

hi im ivy and im currently dying because of college

[shoujoromance]

[63inchestall]

baby: m..m...

me: omg! the babies first words!!

baby: m..m..mmm

me: say momma!

baby: mission report, December 16, 1991

[awwwton]

“how long are you gonna be petty”

[hobijk]

best bts lyrics

“adios middle school”

“abcdefgh hakuna matata”

“your face is fresh like a salad”

“you dont need your airplane mode”

“domain dopeman.com”

“if time is a stock called you i would invest”

“im not even drunk but i pretend to be drunk and act cute”

“please call me ill buy you food”

“after fighting my hormones all day ill pop my pimple”

“stop playing hard to get before i kick you in the butt”

“she is my religion so i can call her she-sus”

[gaybeans-deactivated20161201]

why glasses suck 

they’re always dirty. like w hat the fuck what is coming into contact with my face? why are they so fucking dirty? wha t the fuck 

3D movies 

dont ever fuckin lose them bc good luck tryin to find ANYTHING without them on 

roller coasters 

idk why but like?? children really like to take them off of you??? and play with them??? wh y 

the rain 

steamy bathrooms/kitchens/anywhere with an unnecessary abundance of steam  

tfw u can feel ur prescription getting weaker on you 

[archivedblogposts]

why are people so surprised when celebrities say problematic things? how many problematic things do you say in a single week? please stop pretending celebrities are flawless celestial deities. it is a form of dehumanization.

[scorpiosoojung]

snsd: you think you’re real cool (you’re not)

me: bicth!! u right!

[dennys]

someone fucking threw our cup into space can you believe that shit

[blankkphase]

Alcohol will only make a person cheat if they’d considered doing it while sober. Being drunk changes your behavior, not your morals.

[flowergogh]

*Mic drop*

[meow-sheeran-blog]

how does ed manage to look perfect in every single picture that get’s taken of him

[dutchsheerio-blog]

[2006u]

[jesusdiedforourtins-deactivated]

if you’re having a bad day here is a baby polar bear being tickled

[fruitsaladchewits-deactivated20]

[suzannasalem]

soils extracted from different parts of the sahara desert

[tiddygorrl-deactivated20160429]

b*tch I thought this was a bronzer!!!!!!!

[deathgripsforcutie]

doctor: well its a boy, have you decided on a name yet?

me: my son has no teeth

doctor: thats normal for a newborn sir

me: how will my child survive

[63inchestall]

me: bae I want to try out something different tonight (;

gf: what is it? (;

me: It's gonna be rough ((;

gf: I'm down babe lets try it! (;

me: *hands her boxing gloves* square up

[therealhamster]

anyone wanna make out… a check to me for 500,000 dollars

[dduane]

A guide to washing machine / laundry symbols.