theSmallthings

Gulf Coast. University of South Alabama.

[its-tuesday-again]

[vinstage]

[s-till-s-ane]

[cosmicfaeriewitch]

[mattsjustaroundthecorner-deacti]

[tobacco-and-leather]

Seven Years in Tibet (1997)

[leaveful]

[lasplayaslasmontanas]

[7rav3l3r-blog]

Never realized how much some small changes could impact my life. Literally one of the best months I've had in a long time. 

[7rav3l3r-blog]

five years.

Five years since I wanted to be anything but be me. Five years since I was unhealthy in every way possible. Five years since my life was complete shit.  I see now just how horrible January 22nd was for me. It marks a day where I became less of myself than I already was. Still to this day that feeling haunts me. Being abused repeatedly is never an easy thing to talk about or deal with, especially on your own. Five years ago I had no one that I could turn to, instead I turned to running away from everything. There is no “just leave” when one is in a situation like this. People do not understand there is constant fear with every decision you make.  I still do not talk about everything that happened and do not know if I ever will be able to. I want to be able to help others in this situation but I’m just not ready to deal with everything yet.  Five years is a huge mile stone though. I see the person I have grown to be and I accept that what happened is a part of me and who I am now. I just keep wondering if the person I am now is only because of what happened, because if it is, I do not want to be this person. Who I am is who I never thought I would be and I still struggle with it. 

[7rav3l3r-blog]

This coming May it will have been 3 years since I graduated high school and left a lifestyle behind. Going into my senior year of high school I was determined to change the path that I had been directing my life in. I wanted to stop doing the drugs and make the grades I knew I could make and be something that I thought people would want. Although, almost three years later I find myself looking back on the memories I had during that time of my life. I am starting to wonder if I changed to fit an image or if it was really what I wanted.  I would not change where I am now for anything but I can not help but wonder sometimes what some basic life decisions can do in the long run.  I see myself looking back now more than every and it may be that I miss that life or maybe I am just scared of the possibilities this new route can offer. Either way it is confusing in a way. I suppose it is not too odd though because in a way too, in life, there will always be new chapters and things will always be changing. There is no way to know if the right decisions were made but just to know that you will end up where you’re suppose to be. 

[hayleywilliamsdaily]

[calxfornia]

[pitchblackgo]

[jentehj]

[7rav3l3r-blog]

I see myself either high up in Wall Street, in the high ranks of a Fortune Five Hundred financial department, or living a simple life traveling and doing small accounting work to get money going. I think it is what I want to do versus what I know I could do, but which one will I pick?

[sunnystrong]

Views from this morning’s hike