What a silly question! What a silly, silly question, indeed!
Such a question was almost more than enough to make a man crack a grin.
âHaha! Oh, thatâs⊠Thatâs such a funny question! You see, I almost didnât get itâ almost!! I almost didnât get it! Youâre trying to make a joke, though! I get it!!â
Itâs not that Cioccolata decided to take offense to it, no. Not at all, actually. Rather, it was because Cioccolata chose to let it fly (whoosh! whoooosh!) over his head. There was nothing better than to completely and utterly ignore things you didnât like hearing, after all, and the good doctor was decidedly a master at it! He was an unsuspecting sort to receive this question, but he knew it to be better to simply take it stride.
âItâs funny! In case you canât tell, yes! Itâs funnyâ comical! So~ooo funny that Iâm laughing on the inside!!â he exclaimed with a wide grin suddenly overwhelming and shadowing over the rest of his features. So-called âamusementâ went as far as to cause for corners of eyes to pinch. âI love it when people are so comfortable around me to tell me jokes! If only Secco could tell jokes, ah⊠oh, oh⊠o~oooh!! Maybe thatâs what I should train him in next!â
Hands lashed out without warning, grasping them sternly by the head (one on top of their head with the other tightly clutching them by the chin. perfect! perfect, perfect, perfect!) and holding in place. Cioccolata leaned forward, lowering himself crudely down to their height with tips of noses briskly poking against each other before he drew away in an offended wince.
âI would never, never, nevernevernevernever ever smoke my own hair, though! Do you know how long it took for me to get it this way!? Itâd be such a wasteâ oh dear⊠oh dear, oh dear⊠no! I canât! Dare I say, that I shanât?â
Fingers pressed hardâ firming their grip (heâs treating their head more like a vegetable⊠a tomato, perhaps. ah, wait⊠were tomatoes vegetables? or were they a fruit?) in aggressive gesture as expression formed itself into a strange mix of grimace and grin.
âMaybe we can test that on someone else, thoughââ
ââah, eek!! Are you volunteering!!?â
   âAposematism,' as Beck had studied, was vibrant and contrasting coloration in animals to warn others of toxicity. Of course, decorative displays were used for various other purposes, but the stranger's visage did nothing but conjure up something insectoid. Once they get a black-and-white flash of his tight and bright "smile," Beck's impression is quick to change to SKUNK. Most animals were at least courteous enough to display some sort of warning before an attack (he didn't stomp like a skunk), but they could see that the stranger had been immediately aggressed (unsurprising, given Beck's insulting intonation). It hadn't been the first time they'd poked an interesting bug with a stick just to see how it'd react, and no bite in the past had been enough to deter them from continuing the habit.
   It also wasn't the first time they'd encountered a creature of his kind. If their assessment so far was correct, then this person fell under the familiar category of 'sciencey sort who probably has either a fanatical fixation or fetish... with perhaps a hint of narcissism.' In all honestly the man looked as if he'd walked straight out of one of their teacher's little social parties. Beck was quick to learn that their first mistake was not taking into consideration that Gavino's guests were on a very /tight leash, whereas this man was (in every sense of the word) unhinged -- and they were without the protection of their mentor in any sense. A sharp inhale makes them realize he had snatched their breath from their lungs.
   While the situation may have been familiar to the student, familiarity could not account for the way their heart pounded when he approached and grabbed hold of their head in on swift strike. Their scalp burned and their chin felt icy in his alien-cold grip, but they make no effort to resist aside from a startled yelp and a gentle hand placed atop his own. Of course they were afraid -- who WOULDN'T be?? -- but they'd grown accustomed enough to being manhandled that they're able to remain complacent and malleable as he prattles on.
   It was nothing they hand't done before. A gulp constricts their throat as he closes in, black lips making uncanny white teeth look all the more ferocious. They could handle this. Once you knew how something behaved, it made their aggressive displays a little less intimidating -- but it doesnât stop their face from heating up under the pressure of his manic-eyed scrutiny, bright green and gobbling up every bit of their fearful attention as his nose brushed against the tip of their own. (Almost instinctively Beck exaggerates the fear expressed on their face. They had been looked at like this -- been held like this before. Appeasement was a simple reflex.)
   "Mmph! S-sure!" They squeak, using every ounce of self-restraint they have to keep themself from flinching away from his shrill voice. Certain the fear would consume them without some way to stay afloat, Beck is quick to latch on to the first impulse that drifts their way: attempt to use neoteny to their full advantage. Keeping their youthful features soft and speech practiced perfectly innocently intoned, they lie, "But I'm too little to smoke. So it's, like, bad if I do."
   "How long did it take you?" Once the bite of his fingers pulling their scruffy hair subsided, it was easy for Beck to get on their tip-toes in an attempt to investigate his avant garde display. "Was it like growing a Chia pet? It looks kinda, uh... kinda like this one fungi I saw a thing on once."
   Now Beck knew!! It wasn't an insect or skunk -- this man's hair was cordyceps. (Why did the realization make the hair on their neck prickle?)
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