“Even if they’re not happy with you, I’m happy with you”

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@a-wayofthinking
“Even if they’re not happy with you, I’m happy with you”
“If you feel far from God, who moved ?”
Afghan Proverb
I just pray for softness in all areas of my life.
i like mine supportive, introvert, loyal, jealous.
—Franz Kafka, "The Diaries" (from the travel diaries, 1912)
Hey, saw your posts about getting divorced. I can't tell you how many women around me are feeling the same. Im sorry you're having to go through this. When you need their support they just crumple but when they want the hot pretty wife it's all good they have the energy for that. No matter where he goes whenever there are children involved he will behave the same. So it wasn't you. He won't love someone else better. Just another typical sh*t boy pretending to be a man. I hope Allaah eases your sadness and makes your son the coolness of your eyes. Not being patronising I promise but don't get caught up in the sadness because it won't leave. Trust Allaah and be your best self. He will regret it. You got this. You already had this. xx.
hi. thank you. i actually notice that despite him being in his paternity leave he avoids taking care of his own son, especially alone. we have the period of iddah right now, but i wanted to go to my best friends place (a woman, known her since we were little kids, muslim, lives alone, 30min busride) in order to just take care of myself for less than a day and he said he wants me to take OUR son with me.
i can not believe i married someone like this. the whole beginning of marriage he kept talking about how hes always DREAMT of kids. yeah. idc if he loves someone else, i just hope he wont do this again to anyone else. it kills me to know that apart from the fact that he brought money home, i did literally everything alone. raised our son, been teaching him islam gently, cleaned, cooked, everything. paused my personal life apart from very occasional gym. and now that he divorced me, he’ll probably have the audacity to demand rights on our son more than what is given to him by Allah when i was and still am alone with raising our baby.
ugh. sorry. ive become very bitter towards him and vent a lot. the fact that i have to keep living with him sucks. the thought of getting married again as a single mom stresses me too but in shaa Allah it’ll all go for the best; im trying to focus on how blessed i am to have my son, he makes my worries and bad mood melt alhamdulillaah.
thank you so much for your kindness and ameen to your beautiful duaas, may Allah grant you a stable strong marriage filled with love, ameen.
single mom at 31 was not where i expected myself to be
ive been a stay at home wife, then a stay at home mom cause of my (ex?) husbands wish. i mean i wished for that too, although i liked my job i would always rather take care of my home; husband and son. but never in my life did i think he’d divorce me and it feels like he just got so much stress from actually taking responsibility of our 13month old on a daily basis (he started his paid dad leave 3-4 weeks before he suddenly divorced me).
but who gets divorced cause of stress from a child? how does one go ”this is all too much for me i miss my freedom” then break a family? I got stressed too, i got overwhelmed too, i got insecure and scared too but i did everything regardless.
may Allah make it easy for you and bless you from where you least expect it
آمين , may Allah accept your ibaadah and make you of the righteous. thank you very much, this warmed me; sorry it took me a while to reply, kinda lost with my next step right now
single mom at 31 was not where i expected myself to be
To look after and be looked after
Someone who treats you like they’ve waited their whole life to find you >>>
Emotional safety is my love language.
May you find someone who heals your inner child and nurtures your soul