Hey it's abcdeftea! I write. I do other things. But the important thing is that I write.
This is my spot for all things related to my writing (fanfic and otherwise), hockey rpf musings, and more!! I've been hooked into Mattgabe and any and all things BC line related so expect a lot of that!
Asks are open, feel free to say hi :)
**Note: I used to have a separate side blog dedicated to everything hockey, but since I was spending all my time there, I decided to make my life easier and dump it all over here. If things look a little funky that's why!
hard truth but #that one video of gabe pushing will out of the way after some dude tries to fight him solely so he could fight the dude in will’s stead is 100 times more buzzy than anythying willmack has ever done
writing a fic half-delirious at night and getting overwhelmed at the beauty of love and human connection and all that other sappy shit that really does make life worth living
Currently trying to write a mattgabe fic, except it's morphing into a tale of BC line angst stretching back to the Program. Sorry guys, it's out of my hands and sometimes mattgabe is really just the situationships we made along the way.
thinking abt leno in that apt, the only one not in a fuckass talladega costume, which had felt like the cool aloof mature decision 3 weeks ago but now just feels unspeakably lonely. standing as far as possible from will, who’s chosen his shiny new toy, and gabe, who’s chosen will, even though leno was the one who stayed with gabe to chase their dream another year the way they’d promised. but gabe still went running back to will’s side like always, and leno knows it’s bc gabe needs to be loved as desperately as leno, so he attaches himself to a person who loves easily and makes himself a person who’s easy to love: and leno will never be either of those things. leno only knows how to make himself hard to love so it hurts less when nobody does.
thinking too abt leno at circle tavern, nursing a beer and watching will and gabe hang all over each other like nothing’s changed, and even when mack shows up and will lights up and immediately sways into his orbit, gabe just smiles and acts like it doesn’t kill him that will has a new person to nap with. and maybe it doesn’t! maybe it’s just leno!! bc the next day they all go to dinner at their italian place, the old boys’ spot, with the same leather booths and folded-arms photoshoot and truffle parm fries; except instead of will gabe leno, it’s will gabe mack—as though will is intentionally trying to rewrite every single memory he has of leno by scribbling mack over the top
and leno knows why he wasn’t invited, knows he was a bitch to the kid last night, and so what if he was? celebrini’s just like him, leno can feel it, hungry and ruthless, 200 lbs of barely leashed predator quivering under will’s plea to play nice—so slip the fucking leash, kid. why can’t we all just be fucking honest for once in our lives, he’d thought; bc leno can only accept a love that’s perfectly honest, but only if it’s honestly cruel. bc nobody has ever lied to leno for any reason other than selfish, so he can’t conceive of a boundary that’s meant to protect rather than exclude.
but when celebrini had finally snapped under leno’s needling; when leno had looked, triumphant, at will—you see? he’s no better than i am. he’s just like me. if you’re going to hate me you have to hate him too—will hadn’t even looked at leno. he’d been too busy looking at celebrini, who’d flinched and turned to will, guilty and apologetic and defensive about it, with an affectionate softness that will has never offered leno. and that’s when leno had realised that it was possible for will to cage leno for being a wild animal while petting celebrini for his teeth and claws. that will, who once pressed his lips together and wrenched leno up off the ice for daring to cry after losing natties, hissed at him to get his shit together because nothing embarrasses will more than a public breakdown, was all along a will capable of smiling fondly at celebrini for failing at kegstands and punching windshields and getting kicked out of bars. that maybe it wasn’t the public display that embarrassed will after all; maybe it never had been. maybe, all along, it was just leno
Tags: getting together, one shot, idiots in love, friends to lovers, new york rangers, matt gabe
"Gabe wondered at the circumstances that led him here, standing in this closet-of-a-single-stall-bathroom, made all the more claustrophobic by the 6’9” professional hockey player he was standing there with."
or
it takes Matt ruining his shirt at a grimy dive bar for Gabe to lock in with him
will and ryan, both massachusetts natives, meet at 9 years old playing against and alongside each other in junior hockey, become buddies
2021-2022
gabe, will, and ryan become best friends playing together with the USNTDP u17 program in plymouth, michigan
will and ryan live together with will vote, who they’d known from childhood as well. will (smith)’s parents buy a house 15 minutes away from the program, and during their time at the program will smith’s and will vote’s mothers would alternate staying with the boys for two weeks at a time, flying back and forth from boston to michigan. both of ryan’s parents were working (his mother as a nurse!!); ryan stayed in the basement of the house
gabe was living with his mother. his father, yanic perreault, was an nhl player and at this point was working for the blackhawks organization. he was generally too busy with his work and with gabe’s older siblings to be super involved in his hockey stuff (not that he wasn’t involved, just less so), and so gabe’s mother july took the responsibility of looking after gabe and doing a lot of his coaching & managing stuff. generally though his parents were a hugely essential support system for him through his childhood and continue to be.
important to ME: gabe is originally from sherbrooke, quebec, but his family moved to hinsdale, illinois for yanic’s job with the blackhawks when gabe was in about third grade. he started learning english then and presumably only started being called gabe around this time too!! (gabe isn’t really a common nickname for gabriel in quebec - his mom calls him gaby or gab.) the move was early enough in gabe’s life that he considers himself more american than canadian (his identity as a player is american of course, he plays for team USA), and canadian media about him reflects that often, for example talking about him vs. mack celebrini!! you can see that in the above source, which is in french but the autotranslation isn't bad! tl;dr it’s a very interesting cultural identity
2022-2023
will, gabe, and ryan play together again on the program’s u18 team. they play on a line together, will strictly as a center (!!) and ryan and gabe on his wing. they’re explosive and very effective together
they win gold at u18 worlds
gabe sets a new NTDP record for points in a single season with 132. the previous record was auston matthews’ 117.
ntdp notes
during their time at the program, they played against macklin celebrini, who was on the chicago steel and already a force to reckon with.
they cared a lot about one another. there was a truly crazy level of love and affection in their trio during this time and you could tell, with the way they talked about each other in media availability especially.
summer 2023
they all commit to boston college. will and ryan had been pretty set on it (massholes !!, & will’s family has been going there for fourteen generations) but gabe took some convincing just because he wasn’t sure where was best or if the college route was right for his game. eventually will’s pestering worked, though, and he committed with them
they get drafted to the nhl! will is fourth overall to the san jose sharks (the highest draft pick in BC history), ryan eighth to the washington capitals, and gabe twenty-third to the new york rangers
gabe was snubbed - will and ryan agree, often drove in his IQ and his technical skill; how he sees the ice. ryan called him the smartest player in the draft. i won’t complain though cause i’m a rangers fan lollll
a few more NTDP friends commit to BC: aram minnetian (125th to the dallas stars), drew fortescue (90th to the new york rangers), and will vote
someone else commits to a boston school this year… macklin celebrini. he’s seventeen years old, the youngest player in NCAA hockey and probably the best. he commits to boston university, who BC plays often and has a huge rivalry with.
2023-2024
BC time!!!
gabe and will room together. they like to eat milk and cookies as a snack. (cough cough)
the three of them major in communications, because when you’re a high draft pick you don’t really NEED your degree lol! ryan actually goes to class & tries but gabe and will… not so much. but it’s okay.
important to note with that piece their socioeconomic and familial backgrounds!! ryan wasn’t poor by any means, but his parents were both working, and his relationship with his older brother john is very tough love focused. while will also has emphasized a need for “tough love” during his childhood and gabe is a notorious hard worker, i think the importance of hard work in school as a fallback from hockey kind of escaped both of them in a way that it really didn’t for ryan. we see that manifest later in the lore as well! just an interesting thing to note i think.
will and ryan have all of their classes together, and all but one with gabe (gabe takes french as his language because he’s already fluent). fun tidbit, one of their classes is a theater class and they all get assigned backstage crew instead of acting parts
this is very much a word of mouth thing, but i’ve heard that during this time, ryan and gabe were very much so held together by their attachment to will. a trio because they were both duos, and they were obsessseeeddddd with him
they have a pretty great season. with the three of them on the first line, BC becomes elite offensively, and they hold the #1 spot in the NCAA a few times during the season.
they go to world juniors over new years and win gold for the US
on january 26th and 27th, they face BU in the “battle of comm ave” for the first time as the #1 (BU) and #2 (BC) schools. on the 26th, BC wins 4-1 with both goals by gabe and ryan (gabe’s assisted by both ryan and will, ryan’s assisted by gabe)
on march 23rd, they face BU in the hockey east final. BC wins 6-2, with four goals from will (one assisted by gabe, one assisted by ryan) and a goal from gabe. macklin celebrini (playing for BU!) scored one of BU’s goals 14:45 into the third period, when BC is already up 5-1. in true macklin fashion, he doesn’t celebrate, he just stands there and stews in his frustration lol. BC wins the hockey east championship and will earns tournament MVP.
on april 13th, BC’s seasons ends in the national championship final against denver. They were shut out 2-0. ryan cries and will helps him up off of the ice. gifs are from here
again, you could tell throughout this season how much love they had for each other.
summer of 2024
macklin celebrini goes first overall, as a hockey prodigy and beloved savior, to the san jose sharks
will and macklin sign their entry level NHL contracts to the san jose sharks
2024-2025
gabe and ryan are back at BC to redeem themselves from the loss in the natty finals and get some more development before signing. without will, their new center is james hagens, an incoming freshman and prospected high draft pick. ryan becomes an alternate captain!
gabe and ryan (along with hagens and some other BC and NTDP friends) go to world juniors and get their second consecutive gold! ryan is the captain, and gabe is an alternate.
will, of course, isn’t there. he’s in san jose tearing it up!
ok, not really tearing it up. he has a bit of a slow and clunky start, and of course the sharks were… really REALLY bad this season. but that isn’t what’s important: what’s important is his relationship with macklin celebrini. they get crazy close immediately, a dynamic and iconic duo; very soulmate-ish! they’re just, like… obsessed with each other, and they seem to really understand and feel at home with each other. and they’re FUNNY, they’re having a lot of fun even though their team sucks. they’re like. the best friends ever
they’re roomates on the road and they like to order milk and cookies. sounds like anyone we know???????????????? lol??????????????????
gabe and ryan don’t have so much fun. BC isn’t bad but they certainly aren’t as good as they were with will there, and they’re choking a lot more in important or emotionally charged games.
on january 27th, mack walks into the sharks game wearing will’s jersey from when he scored four goals in the hockey east final vs. BU. they’d made a bet that weekend when BC and BU faced each other, the penalty for losing was wearing the other guy’s college jersey. (they win that game… which was rare lol)
this comes up again in february, during four nations break, when BC and BU face each other in the beanpot. mack and will go to the game together - there’s talk about another jersey bet
BU wins the beanpot. gabe opens the scoring with a ryan assist, but that ends up being BC’s only goal of the game. the final score is a 1-4 BU win.
interestingly, will isn’t spotted at all with former teammates or with gabe or ryan. he watches the game from a box and he isn’t spotted going out afterward. this doesn’t necessarily mean he didn’t see the guys, but it’s certainly weird considering how close he was with gabe and ryan especially and his long standing connection to the school! in contrast, mack (whose only connection to BU is that his brother plays there and that he played there for a season) reads BU’s starting lineup alongside lane hutson of the canadiens, and then is spotted out with the team, dancing and drinking his beloved white girl high noon
it takes a while for the shoe to drop, but eventually will wears mack’s jersey for walk in - before the march 22nd game against the boston bruins (will’s childhood team). (they win this game too)
BC falls short from the national championship again, this time losing in the semifinals to denver (the same team they lost to in the finals the year before)
gabe and ryan sign their NHL contracts a day or two after the loss
will reposts both instagram posts announcing their signing on his story, but leno’s is captionless and gabe’s has a red heart
gabe goes to new york of course, who had a pretty shitty season. when he signed, they were gunning for a wildcard spot which they ultimately didn’t get. he only played five games with them and didn’t look too bad on the ice, but it was somewhat apparent that he wasn’t quite ready for NHL caliber play. he does start to bond with his teammates, though, notably (to me? to everyone?) vets like chris kreider (who was traded after 14 seasons with the rangers that june), vincent trocheck, and younger guys like othmann and matt rempe
ryan goes to washington, where history is actively being made. he scores his first goal (an empty netter) in the game where ovi ties gretzky’s scoring record (will doesn’t repost the first goal graphic, though ryan had posted his back at the start of the season), and of course is there when ovi breaks it. all of the caps are obsessed with him - he lives on a floor of pierre luc dubois’ house with him and his fiance, alex ovechkin calls him babe and baby and little kid leno, brandon duhaime barks in his face… he fits RIGHT in with them.
the caps go to the playoffs, but ryan doesn’t really make an impact
summer 2025
the sharks obviously don’t make the postseason, so will goes to sweden for worlds and on may 25th, wins gold. he hangs out a lot with matty beniers and zeev buium (who pkayed for denver both times they beat BC btw!) and gets covered in champagne of course. while in sweden, he hangs out with mack (who’s playing on a line with crosby for team canada).
on may 29th, ryan finally posts on his instagram with a little tribute to BC and his teammates there. you’d think that with all of their history, will would be featured in the post, right? WRONG!!
in ryan’s post we have gabe, james hagens, will vote, teddy stiga. no will at all. the first image is one of gabe and ryan together on the ice, actually, in a very similar orientation to will and mack in will’s end of season photodump! interesting interesting…
gabe comments pretty much immediately: “Brother for life , love you lean ❤️”. this is significantly more heartfelt than anything he’s commented on will’s posts, and that along with their behavior through the season & gabe’s presense in the post without will indicates that there’s been a shift with the tree of them - rather than will as a holding factor and guy to orbit, ryan and gabe are a duo without him now. just interesting to meeeee!!
a few hours later, will comments on the POST HE ISN’T FEATURED IN: “6934 🥲”. those are their college numbers. will 6, ryan 9, gabe 34. Cool! Great!
on june 5th, gabe posts a dump on instagram. it has both ryan and will in it, ryan twice in candids and will once in a more posed photo that comes across as a little bit uncomfortable.
on june 27th, will and zeev buium work at the NHL draft, interviewing picks as they leave the stage. will talks with james hagens about hagens’ suit, which was made by gabe’s brother who owns a tailoring company, and about BC, and he speaks with michael misa (2nd ovr. to the sharks) briefly but Kind Of rudely. not much of note here but interesting if you make it interesting!
will has (presumably a lot of) BC guys over to his family’s house on cape cod for the fourth of july, but we only know for sure that ryan and gabe were there, because on july 9th, gabe posted a picture of the three of them in front of the house Visibly Blasted and in all of their conservative white man glory. so now they’re friends again apparently! yay! will comments “34-6-9” (which, ouch), and matt rempe (crucially building a relationship with gabe!) comments “ladies loved this one”. things to chew on.
on july 15th, will and ryan go to the same coldplay concert in boston. presumably together, but i guess it could be that they both just happened to be there because they both are white men who were in MA at the time
on july 18th, the rangers post matt rempe mic’d up at a junior rangers practice. he and gabe are there together, coaching these kids, and they have maaaajor heart eyes for each other - kind of continuing what we started to see at the end of the 24-25 season. they have some really sweet interactions in the video
july 24th, ryan and will participate in the shoulder check showcase. they’re on opposing teams, but they do have some cute little friendly moments! gabe was also named as a participant but ultimately wasn’t there for unnamed reasons.
at the end of july, mack is invited to train in nova scotia with sidney crosby and nathan mackinnon. he invites will Of Course, so they have a cute couple days up there!
all three of them are spotted together with other members of BC’s hockey team at the BC football season opener on august 30th
on september 3rd, will posts a summer dump which is completely sans ryan and (!) mack. gabe is there, notable in a group BC hockey image FROM THE AUGUST 30TH FOOTBALL TAILGATE. which ryan was at. there’s also a picture of will and gabe in a pool, presumably at will’s cape house.
also on september 3rd, gabe and ryan participated in the NHLPA rookie showcase together, and seemed pretty typically affectionate towards one another, especially ryan in his media availability.
2025-2026
gabe fails to make the rangers roster out of dev camp, and gets sent down to the hartford wolfpack. rangers coach mike sullivan says he wants him to get faster, stronger, and more confident. gabe accepts that; it’s clear that his confidence is down but he’s determined to do whatever’s best for his career
ryan makes the capitals roster - doesn't even attend dev camp
will is obviously already on the sharks roster, but not as a center - now, he’s going to play on macklin’s wing. this is a big thing: his entire life he’s been a center, and there’s a huge demand for centers right now! he’s putting himself in a disadvantageous position just so he can play on a line with mack. interesting interesting interesting.
ryan does pretty well! he’s not incredible but he’s certainly not awful.
gabe’s a little rocky in hartford at first, but quickly becomes their best guy on the ice. he’s too skilled for the AHL, it’s obvious, but when he gets briefly called up to the NHL in november, he doesn’t look ready, and gets sent back down after a few games
good to note: in new york, gabe is getting close with rempe & with noah laba, also with alexis lafreniere who he speaks french with. in hartford, he’s getting close with brendan brisson, another young guy with a father with a legacy (pat brisson, a very notable agent). also, matt rempe gets injured when the sharks come to new york in mid october, he’s out till december
ryan is injured in early december
will is also injured in early december, mack gets in a bit of a scrum with the guy who did it
gabe gets called up a bit before christmas, scores his first NHL goal on december 18th. will posts the graphic on his story, ryan doesn’t!!!!!!
on december 23rd, the rangers and capitals play each other. somehow it works out that that’s the day ryan comes back from injury (!!), and he and gabe interact briefly on the ice - gabe tries to hit him and just stumbles is most what happens. the rangers win 7-3.
after the game, a reporter asks ryan if he and gabe talked at all, and ryan seems annoyed & shuts down a bit. “a few words,” he says. “that’s it.” so… trouble in paradise? it’s strange because ryan has always been happy to talk about gabe in media availability; he’s always been the first one to talk about how great at hockey he is and how he’s a good friend. they were so close through will (in a sense) abandoning them, and they’ve been friends since they were 16. they didn’t even get coffee?
gabe spends christmas at will's family's place in massachusetts, with the smith extended family
will and ryan get dinner when the sharks go to washington for january 15, but will is still injured so they don't play against each other. will comes back the very next game
gabe and will get dinner the night before the rangers play the sharks in san jose, on january 23. max miller writes an article about it and they talk about it in pregame media with both will and gabe, which is something ryan didn't have with either of them
mack scores twice in the early minutes of the first with a lot of will-mack duo magic
during the game there's this little moment which makes me feel nauseous where will sees gabe skating towards him and holds out his hand as if he's going for a tap but gabe just skates past
and THEN the famous gabe-on-macklin elbow! late into the game, the rangers are losing bad, and gabe blatantly elbows mack as they pass each other. mack gets a bloody nose. the sharks broadcasters make a joke about how will is gonna "break up" with gabe after the game, and then in postgame media will is asked about it, and he just giggles and says he thought gabe was going to get a longer penalty for it
at the start of the olympic break, will and gabe were spotted at a bc game together. a few days later, will, gabe, ryan, and jacob fowler were spotted at the bc vs. bu beanpot together
other things
will and ryan are notoriously catholic, pray before games and wear crucifixes and shit. will added a rosary ring to his chain alongside the cross and st. christopher pendant this season, actually, which is interesting!!! gabe is different, though, till 2/5/26 it had been a bit of a debate because of his cultural background & because he was wearing necklaces with his number on them (always deriving from his father's #94), never a crucifix. but as of 2/5 he now wears a cross!
and just to drill it in again: these three guys really, really loved one another. they respected one another, and thought incredibly highly of each other as players, linemates, teammates, and people. for a long time they just… they ALWAYS talked about how great the others were!!! everything was about each other!!! and after will left BC, that started to stop. it was still there between ryan and gabe, but at the start of the 25-26 season even that ended. so the questions are essentially about what happened that could’ve outweighed the devotion to each other
and that's basically where we're at! let me know if it looks like i made any mistakes & please send asks or messages with any questions or to discuss!! i can also provide any sources if they aren't linked.
willmack future fic where Will's retired due to an injury and becomes a youth hockey coach in Boston, while Mack is still in the show, and they've fallen out years ago by this point.
The Sharks have a free day before a game in Boston and Mack's agent has him visiting a local rink/kids team for some reason that has to do with him being a BU alum or whatever.
Of course that happens to be the very rink Will coaches at and more than that it's actually Will's team he's unknowingly signed up to spend a practice with. And now he's facing 20 high-energy 8-year-olds, a social media team and all their cameras, and the ex-situationship that he hasn't talked to in God-knows how long. The whole time Mack is trying to act like it's totally cool and fine and not awkward, and convince everyone and himself that he isn't freaking out.
But then they're face to face again and he remembers why they were such good friends in the first place, and how easy it was to talk to Will until it wasn't. And the kids are great and Will's great with them and and and-
They get dinner after and fall back in love and live happily ever after, the end.
came up with a willmack scene and am now trying to write a whole fic around it before the writer's block demons imprison me again. in the meantime, here's a blurb xx
---
How do you talk about something unnamed? Something you never really figured out was real or not? The answer is that you don’t.
So Will and Mack never did. Never addressed the thing buzzing between them. They probably never would have agreed on what it was anyways.
But if Will had to guess, it started on a Wednesday night during their second season.
They were at Mack’s, playing Fortnite on the couch. Will had wiped him, leading Mack to shove him in retaliation, and the whole thing had devolved into a half-hearted wrestling match. Next thing he knew, he had Mack pinned down to the carpet, whatever chirp he was about to launch dying on his tongue. His eyes had locked onto Mack’s wide-eyed gaze, his face pink and lips slightly parted, and his ability to speak pretty much evaporated.
A part of him realized he was being weird, frozen in place like that, but a different part of him told that part to shut the hell up. Because Mack wasn’t saying anything either, equally frozen. Mack’s eyes broke from him, flicked down and….
That’s when Will kissed him.
Stopped thinking and just moved. Closing the distance, his lips brushed against Mack’s with the softest touch. It was barely a kiss, honestly. More of the ghost of one, chaste and timid, the slightest contact. He hadn't even known he'd wanted to do that until now.
When he pulled back and opened his eyes, Mack’s were still just as wide, the emotion in them kind of different though. Not disgusted or angry, but something else. Or maybe that’s just what Will told himself he saw.
His own regret seeped in pretty quick anyways.
Mack opened his mouth like he was about to say something, but Will beat him to it. He rolled off Mack and sat up, leveling a lazy grin like he wasn’t internally screaming FUCK, FUCK, FUCK.
“I win, Celly,” keeping his tone playful as he grabbed Mack’s baseball cap, which had fallen off at some point, and smashed it back on Mack’s head, down far enough to cover his eyes.
“Fuck off,” Mack grumbled back, fixing the cap before grabbing his controller and plopping back down on the couch. The moment had passed; Will was safe. Thank God.
Later, before Will left, there was a pause where he was sure Mack was going to say something. That look passed over his face, the one Will could never quite read, and he opened his mouth, said, “You….”
You. So many places that sentence could go. You kissed me. You can’t do that. You’re disgusting. You shouldn’t come back here. You should kiss me again. Mack said none of those things, though. He only shook his head, just slightly, like he was clearing a thought away.
Instead, he clapped Will on the shoulder, said “See you at practice”, like always. Like nothing had happened at all. And maybe nothing did happen. Will could almost convince himself that the almost-sort-of kiss never happened, and he got the feeling it might be the same for Mack.
Because nothing changed after that, at least not outwardly. But maybe, everything had.
loving the possibilities of obvious Mack vs oblivious Will like:
determined, focused Mack who knows how to work hard to get what he wants and what he wants is Will vs oblivious, easygoing Will, with his many close male friendships over the years, who is somehow blind to it all and rationalizes everything Mack does as platonic
Mack: *literally confessing his love and throwing himself at Will*
Will: yeah as homies
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