singer songwriter crushes

Older than your mom

[chappellsource]

CHAPPELL ROAN + BRANDI CARLILE — at the Elton John AIDS Foundation Academy Awards Viewing Party Red Carpet, March 2, 2025

[thevelvetgoldmine]

PATRICK SWAYZE as Vida Boheme in To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar

[sinnahsaint]

Agreed. Teen me was in love with this movie and scared to watch it around my dad.

I think it was really important that there was a variety of characters. I didn’t have modern terms for it but even as a sheltered teen I understood that Noxeema was having fun playing dressup and Vida was a Lady-with-an-adamsapple and neither of them deserved the hate they received for being who they are.

[mending-up-your-fences]

Some of Brandi Carlile’s gayest* performances, as determined by me

*note: every performance is gay because she is gay. These are just some highlights.

———

Paraphrasing, “I sang ‘I Will Always Love You’ to Dolly, romantically”

A series of Brandi singing gays songs she wrote about her wife, Catherine, to/with her

Gay songs she covers with Catherine (extra gay points for the Indigo Girls and Tracy Chapman of it all, extra bonus for the opening for Joni Mitchell):

You know that feeling when you were a gay mess in the 00’s and sing your penance via a Robyn cover?

Lesbian “She Used to Be Mine,” no further comment necessary

There’s something so gay about Brandi singing the straightest song of all time

“If She Ever Leaves Me” her gay Western song

This, which is gay in ways too unfathomable and deep to explain, via farmer_doug1 on instagram

Other highlights: literally everything, she’s so gay that a rainbow ended at the stage a few weeks ago when she sang The Story while opening for Pink

[bonbriver]

Brandi Carlile | 7.9.23 | Levitate Music Festival | Marshfield, MA

[womenwearingsuitsandblazers]

[xiaq]

Small Town Grocery Store Stories: LGBTQ+ friendly edition

Me: minding my own damn business in the grocery store

One of my students and a few of his teammates enter the dairy aisle. 

My student is holding hands with one of his teammates. 

My student: Oh hey, Professor X!

Me, who has both my student and his girlfriend in my class: …Hello

My student, looking at his hand-holding partner: Oh! Don’t worry. My girlfriend knows. Not that I’m cheating! I’m not cheating. I’m not gay.

Hand Holding boy: Not that being gay is a bad thing! It’s a good thing!

My student: Right! But no, listen. We aren’t together, we just hold hands in public sometimes.

Hand Holding Boy: Especially on Friday nights. And weekends. And at away games.

My student: Because sometimes people will say shit and then we can punch them! And if the fight started because someone was being homophobic, coach won’t get mad at us.

Hand Holding Boy: Always nice to punch a homophobe. And [gesturing to another boy in the group] maybe they’ll think twice about saying something to [other boy’s name] if he ever gets a boyfriend and wants to hold his hand for real. The Gay One, resigned but smiling: I’ve decided it’s sweet and not really fucking weird.

[the-long-gone-souls]

This is what “boys will be boys” is meant to be

[chaoticevilbean]

This is the best thing I’ve seen in a while.

[transientmorality]

NEVER HAVE I EVER | 2.09 “…stalked my own mother”

[mediagifs]

NEVER HAVE I EVER 4.01 - … lost my virginity

[stephencolbertly]

Tig Notaro on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

[rob-pattinson]

THE MARVELS 2023 | dir. Nia DaCosta

[avocadomatcha]

Kamala Khan meets Nick Fury

THE MARVELS (2023)

[rylandsgrace]

#The most relatable avenger (if she gets in)

[filmouts]

THE MARVELS (2023) dir. Nia DaCosta

[sersi]

Kamala Khan, Monica Rambeau, and Carol Danvers ✨ THE MARVELS (2023) dir. Nia DaCosta

[placeapuppyinmyhair]

BARBIE (2023)

[livelovecaliforniadreams]

[unpretty]

some dudes like to talk a big game about how comedy suffers when people are afraid to offend but man, Mitch Hedberg was a white dude working in the era of peak offensive edgelord and his shit holds the fuck up so while most comedians will never come up with anything as timeless as “if carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be fucked up” they could at least make an effort

[unpretty]

[siphersaysstuff]

Every McDonald’s commercial ends the same way, right? “Prices and participation may vary.” I wanna open a McDonald’s and not participate in anything. I wanna be a stubborn McDonald’s owner. I’ll say “Cheeseburgers? Nope. We got spaghetti! And blankets! We are not affiliated with that clown.”

Every book is a children’s book if the kid can read.

I would like to have a product that was available for three easy payments and one fuckin’ complicated payment. We can’t tell you which payment it is, but one of these payments is gonna be a bitch! The mailman will get shot to death, the envelope will not seal, and the stamp will be in the wrong denomination! Good luck, fucker! That last payment must be made in wampum!

Hey, if you wanna talk to me after the show, I’ll be… fuckin’ surprised.

[awa64]

This shirt is “dry-clean only”… Which means it’s dirty.

One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said “Here’s a picture of me when I was younger.” Every picture is of you when you were younger. “Here’s a picture of me when I’m older.” “You son-of-a-bitch! How’d you pull that off? Lemme see that camera… What’s it look like? ”

An escalator can never break, it can only become stairs. You would never see an “Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order” sign, just “Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.

I play golf. I’m not good at golf, I never got good. I never got a hole-in-one. But I did hit a guy. And that’s way more satisfying. You’re supposed to yell “Fore!” but I was too busying mumbling “There ain’t no way that’s gonna hit him.”

When you’re in Hollywood and you’re a comedian, everybody wants you to do other things besides comedy. They say “All right you’re a stand up comedian, can you act? Can you write? Write us a script.” They want me to do things that’s related to comedy, but it’s not comedy. That’s not fair. It’s as though if I was a cook, and I worked my ass off to become a good cook, and they said “All right you’re a cook… can you farm?”

[amphitryo-deactivated20190813]

- “Rice is great when you’re you’re hungry and you want 10,000 of something”

- “Tennis is depressing because no matter how good you get, you will never be as good as a wall”

- “I order the club sandwich all the time, but I’m not even a member, man. I don’t know how I get away with it”

[anexperimentallife]

- “I used to think I could control ducks with my mind. But it turns out ducks and I just have really similar ideas about what ducks should do.”

- “I used to do a lot of drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.”

“I don’t have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who would be really mad if she heard me say that.”

- “I wanna hang a map of the world in my house. Then I’m gonna stick pins in all the locations that I’ve traveled to. But first I’m gonna have to travel to the top two corners so it doesn’t fall down.”

Mitch Hedberg was one of the funniest dudes alive.