Non-practicing intellectual.

Xiaq on A03. EL Massey for published work.

[xiaq]

FAQ

Hi! I’m Xiaq or E.L. Massey IRL.

You can find me on:

Instagram Here

AO3 Here

Substack Here

[email protected]

My published works are Like Real People Do (2022), Like You’ve Nothing Left to Prove (2023), All Hail the Underdogs (2023) and Free from Falling (2024) which started nearly a decade ago as OMGCP fic. The latter two are standalone books, the first two must be read together.

I’m currently working on an adult fantasy original fiction series (TBD) as well as Breakaway Book Five (2027) and a new YA hockey romance called Playing Aces (2027). I recently completed a Star Trek fanfic on AO3. For more on my writing you can check the tags: #authorthings and #mywriting.

If you’re looking for downloaded fic versions of LRPD and AHTU, I can’t send them to you for contract reasons, but I CAN direct you here and here where you may find folks who are willing to assist :)

5% of royalties from my first book, LRPD, goes to a queer charity each month. If you want to suggest a charity for future donations, you can do so via chat or any of the above listed ways to contact me.

Deacon is my 13 yr old, retired, service dog. He's a Belgian Mal and I do not recommend Mals, as a breed, for service work. He's a special boy. Feel free to message me if you want to talk about SD stuff.

If you're looking for student stories/tales from my time in academia, the tags are #shitmystudentssay or #shitmystudentswrite.

If you’re looking for DIY/renovation content, the tag is #DIY

For posts about my partner, the tag is #B

If you’re looking for paramotor/flying content the tag is #paramotor or #x learns to fly.

I will not share or donate to any fundraisers unless I know the beneficiary, or someone I know can confirm they know the beneficiary.

[danceundersparklinglights]

i’m going to be really honest with you guys i think the tendency to read the absolute worst possible intentions into every action you don’t agree with is getting too automatic and it’s eating you from the inside out

[xiaq]

Another project I’ve been dying to do once the first draft of Playing Aces was complete is a glow up for our garage entryway, and today I got started!

I freehanded this. Please clap.

(Plan is to use existing items for wall organization and find a second-hand shelf or cabinet for shoe storage).

[xiaq]

In today’s edition of why do people wait to be creepy until B is out of town, we have a lady who came into the fence, walked around the porch to look in the windows, saw me inside, and then tried to open the (thankfully locked) front door. Why.

Lady, this is a foolproof approach to getting shot.

[xiaq]

The Playing Aces manuscript is due Aug 1 and I’ve just finished the last chapter. 🎊 I’ll get the epilogue written tomorrow and then I’ll be done with the first draft right on time. Objectively I knew I could write a book in 3-4 months because I’ve written full-length fic in that amount of time, but man, I’ve still been a little anxious about that deadline. 😅

[xiaq]

BRB, riding my bike to the store for some sparking grape juice since I don’t like champagne. 🥂🍾

[xiaq]

Just noticed on audible that free from falling is getting an audiobook???? Hello??? This is so amazing

Yes!! December this year. I actually haven’t been given an official date from Tantor yet, but Audible is saying Dec 8th, so that’s probably a safe assumption.

[xiaq]

The doors are looking good! Old varnish and paint is gone, they’re sanded smooth, and now I’ll try and match them to the library floor without having to buy new stain (I’ve got a half dozen left from other projects 🤞🏼). Wish me luck!

[bebx]

“We hope this email finds you well” babe, the only emails I hope find me well are the ones from Archive of Our Own

[nezyy78]

🙂‍↕️

[gaylor-moon]

[grippy3000]

fun fact one of the world champions in pepper-eating contests is a trans woman and she actually faced significant backlash because people somehow thought she had a biological advantage. to eating spicy pepper

[grippy3000]

update bc i went back and checked: her name is brianna “the chilli queen” skinner and she set a record in 2017 by slamming back 23 carolina reapers consecutively. she only stopped when told to by the referees, and the next year she stepped down out of boredom. queen

[pettyartist]

Here's a picture of her, by the way

And her super supportive wife

[nentuaby]

The championship, it should be noted, is unisex. Apparently being a trans woman gives you an innate biological advantage over both cis men and cis women.

[vexwerewolf]

The innate biological advantage of being cool as fuck

[xiaq]

Just had a kinda scary experience but the way my panicked brain chose to handle it was frankly top tier, so now you’re going to hear about it.

So to set the scene, B is out of town and I was in the garage rolling paint-stripper onto the oak doors I got from a Victorian house salvage (as one does). Because of the fumes, I had the garage door open and I did not have Deacon with me because I didn’t want him breathing that in. Our garage faces a back alley, the sun had set, and I had my headphones in. I wasn’t really thinking about any of that being a problem until I look up and realize there’s a man in the garage with me. Like a sizable dude. Uncomfortably close to me.

So I take out my headphones like, “uh, hi, can I help you?” And first he asks for money and I tell him I don’t have any. Then he asks if I have weed or “anything else,” and I’m like, “sorry my dude, I got nothin.” Then he asks if this is my house. I say yup. At this point, I pocket my headphones and turn back to my project and keep rolling on stripper hoping that he’ll take a hint and walk back out again except he comes closer and, while asking about what I’m doing, places himself between me and the door to the house. And then he asks if I live here alone. Which as a 100lb woman in a confined space with a strange man at night in alley with very little foot traffic and my best escape route blocked, is possibly the scariest thing he could have asked me. At which point my brain was like, “never fear! I’ve got this” and I was like:

“Oh man, I mean, technically I live here with my husband, but right now my brother is also sort of living here and it was supposed to just be for a few weeks for him to get back on his feet after getting out of prison but it’s been months and he hasn’t been able to find a job on account of the whole felony battery conviction and our parents refuse to let him stay with them, so we’re kind of his only option but like, he’s sleeping in my office, which is super annoying, you know?”

The guy immediately took a couple steps away and was like, “Oh, prison, that’s rough.”

And I was just rolling away with the paint stripper like, “Yep, totally unfair too since the other guy deserved it—he was our baby sister’s ex and treated her like shit, but I guess he ended up with permanent brain damage? And it was premeditated. So. That made it a felony rather than, you know, a lesser assault charge.”

Guy takes another step back. “Yeah. Hm. Shit sucks. Do you have an outlet I could use to charge my phone?”

“Mmm, not out here. And our dog will lose his shit if you go around and use the one on the porch. He’s a Belgian Shepherd and he barks really loud which we try to avoid at night since the neighbors have a baby. The park has some by the bathrooms though, it’s three blocks that way.”

“Right. Okay. I’ll…check the park.”

“Okay. Have a nice night!!”

And then as soon as he’d started down the alleyway, I was booking it straight into the house.

Could he have been a good-intentioned dude who asked questions in the worst way possible while also accidentally positioning himself so as to seem ill-intentioned? Maybe! But I sure as hell will not be doing any projects in the garage without Deacon with me from here on out. Good grief.

[xiaq]

The Playing Aces manuscript is due Aug 1 and I’ve just finished the last chapter. 🎊 I’ll get the epilogue written tomorrow and then I’ll be done with the first draft right on time. Objectively I knew I could write a book in 3-4 months because I’ve written full-length fic in that amount of time, but man, I’ve still been a little anxious about that deadline. 😅

[the-zenith-calls]

My favorite scenes in the LotR books are the ones where Legolas has vital information and just decides it's not important to share.

Like when Gandalf spent literal PAGES trying to figure out why the vibes were off in Moria and Legolas chimes in with just "it's a balrog :) that shit's evil :) we're so fucked :)" like what do you MEAN you knew already and just didn't tell him??

Or at the beginning of Two Towers when Aragorn thinks there's something nearby so he puts his ear to the ground to listen, and then like 10 minutes later is like "hmmm i hear horses" and Legolas is just like "mm yep. there are 105 blond bitches with spears" like you just let your friend put his face in the dirt and you can SEE them??

Legolas please gain a sense of urgency

[knives-in-the-dishwater]

It's because legolas hasn't spent enough time with non-elves to remember that they don't know what he knows.

gandalf is scratching his head in moria, and legolas is thinking "oh man, the wizard noticed something off *besides* the obvious balrog that we all are aware of??"

"I wonder what aragorn is listening for? must be hard to hear, what with all of the horses. How many horses are there, actually? 1... 2... 3..."

[taavicleric]

"What do your elvish eyes see?" is Aragorn saying, as politely as possible, "Because the REST OF US are at a significant disadvantage, Prince Dipshit."

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[fruitcakebro]

Holy moly they're GOOD. The music is fucking FIRE, and the outfits??? They're all so PRETTY???

[snoodly-boop]

Does anybody know who these are??? Do they have albums!! 🤩🤩🤩

[raspberryslut]

I was so curious that I had to go find this band. They're called Fortress Dwellers and they have a website with all of their socials!

They released an album too! I don't think this song is on it but the rest of their stuff is SO GOOD !!

MUSIC | Fortress Dwellers

Step into the fantasy world of Fortress Dwellers. A fantasy Renaissance musical collective blending epic original music, immersive performan

[hollandar]

Hudson Williams, #1 Shane Understander

I think Shane was a character who, soon as I read him, made all the sense to me. I felt immediately a kinship and an ownership over Shane. I was like, “I need to be the only person to tell this story. I get it. I want to be the person to be Shane and I want to spend time with him.” [x]

(sources below)

PANEL 1 Out

PANEL 2 (fear/desire) The Permanent Rain Press

PANEL 3 (vegas bathroom) Numero Netherlands

PANEL 4 (tears) Harper's Bazaar

PANEL 5 (ilya inverse) Teen Vogue Image: [x]

PANEL 6 (additions) (4 gifs) Numero Netherlands Entertainment Weekly

PANEL 7 (good job) Them

PANEL 8 (dichotomy) eTalk CTV CBC News Images: [x] [x] [x]

PANEL 9 (cottage home) Variety

PANEL 10 (heart eyes) Timid

PANEL 11 (evolution) Much Image: [x]

PANEL 12 (yuna) Variety

PANEL 13 Timid Numero Netherlands Out Image: [x]

[runawaymarbles]

The midjourney stuff just reminds of when we were trying to find a new platform to host the ao3 donation form, and companies kept trying to tell me about all their "ai" features that would track donor engagement, and figure out the optimal pattern to email individual donors asking for follow up donations, and all the ways they suggest we manipulate people into staying on our websites. It was a great way to filter out who either wasn't listening to us when we described our ethics and donor base, or just didn't believe us.

Now granted ao3 is a unique case based on a) the amount of page views we get in any given time period and b) the fact that most donors absolutely do Not want to be identified as such anywhere, (the default "list of recent donors" module got nuked Immediately) but it surprised me some that the concept of "donors who value their privacy and would be furious at even the whiff of AI" is unique. Some of us really are just existing in different worlds.

[zz9pzza]

Op's tags

#I just started dropping '2.5 Billion page views a month'#into conversations as early as possible bc they would Not believe me otherwise#it was right up there with having to say 'csam attacks' to get them to take my compartmentalization of information concerns seriously#turns out those are the magic words#otw#op

[runawaymarbles]

The last part was kind of insane, honestly. When we started changing platforms for the donor database, I kept telling them that yes I was aware we already had an account for the volunteer database, and no that could not be connected to the donor database. And they said yes fine sure and then connected them anyway. And I called them back and said, excuse me, I'm confused, I can see both databases. And they said, well, yeah, but it's only you, someone has to be able to see both databases to give other users access. The other users can't see both. And I said, no, we have been asking for a completely separate database. I should not be able to see both. And they said, you are one organization, one organization can't have two databases. And I said, last year someone used our volunteer email list to commit approximately one thousand felonies. Please feel free to imagine how much worse it could have been had they had a way to use volunteers' email addresses to get their legal names. We do not want this to be something anyone can do no matter how much we trust them. Let me describe those felonies to you in more detail. And they emailed me two hours later and said, you can have two separate databases.

[kyraneko]

This post feels like watching an iceberg go by in clear water. The amount of stuff going on beneath the surface of AO3 just astonishes.

[jeffsatyr]

(ID in alt)

[elodieunderglass]

Approximately one THOUSAND felonies

[xiaq]

I hope this is okay to ask, but what are your must haves and recommendations for dog hiking and camping gear?

Re hiking stuff, you can refer to this post!

Re camping stuff, in addition to the items listed above, I’d say a travel-friendly container for dog food/treats (Kurgo has nice ones), collapsible water and food bowls, a blanket/travel-bed/sleeping bag—Deacon has a travel blanket that he knows is his “spot” when we camp, which keeps him from being a tripping hazard in the night if someone (me, it’s always me) needs to stumble out of the tent to pee. And Deacon has good recall/can be trusted off-leash, but our friends with not-so-trustworthy dogs use zipline systems to give them freedom to roam around camp without the ability to run off, which seems more effective than ground tie systems. Oh and either some pet-friendly wipes or some rags and a water source to clean their feet before letting them into the tent (Especially if they’re getting into dirt/sand).

I think that’s it, but if anyone has additional tips/products, please do add them!

[xiaq]

The Writing Fountain continues to level up. Im still hoping for a frog or snail or gnome figurine, but no luck yet at goodwill/fb marketplace.