tw ramcoa
question for you or anyone in the reblogs:
if torturing or abusing someone with the intent of creating a system is considered ramcoa,
would an alter doing the same to another alter in the same system with the intent of creating a subsystem be considered ramcoa as well?
this is unfortunately happening in our system and we're trying to stop it, but we fear the damage has already been done...
-@anonblog
I believe there is a lot of misinformation in this question, and I'm going to be gentle with this.
In theory, yes, torturing and abusing someone with the intent of creating a system is a form of ramcoa. ramcoa is an abbreviation for ritual abuse, mind control, and organized abuse. they are all separate things. you are specifically talking about mind control. in theory, yes, this is a form of mind control and intimidation done from notably a very young age from an outside force. it is organized, calculated, and usually (but not always) multigenerational within the organized group, cult, or otherwise.
which is why I have to say, no, you can not claim ramcoa. because it's not from an outside source, and it's notably not done before the age of ten, which is when the cut-off for DID is.
but listen to me.
what you're experiencing is real, and your brain is processing it in the way of being tortured or abused to form this subsystem because it is a way of internally processing it for some reason. work backwards. some persecutors do things because they think that it's helping the system in some way.
you are being conditioned and pressured internally, possibly, sure, but that is not the same as torture for mind control, and it would be offensive and distasteful to consider it as such.
do not refer to your experiences as ramcoa.
^ the above text was written by a friend of ours who has gone through ramcoa. We, as in the blog owner/runner, do not have the knowledge nor experience to further help.
Ramcoa, as an acronym of abuse, is heavily misunderstood and mysticized. and I am not a professional. don't ask me questions on this shit and expect professional responses.
Ramcoa/oea is a touchy subject with a shit-ton of misinformation online and in some therapy spaces. If you or others seriously believe you're a victim of it. Do not doink around online. Go straight to a professional who is knowledgeable in the subject.
It can be extremely dangerous to fuck around and find out on your own. It can cause you loads and loads of harm if uncovered improperly or before you're ready.
I am just a tumblr blog runner. I cannot stress this enough. I, like most tumblr blogs (if not all), are not trained professionals.
damn ok sorry
i shouldve clarified but the alter (who ill refer to as tq) who is torturing the other (kt) is doing it merely for their enjoyment. they arent a persecutor and in fact want us to stay as far away from healing as possible (i believe the term is malicitor) which is why they did this (kt was 9 in the innerworld at the time).
and we sought out information from victims rather than professionals because of our situation, we literally cannot bring up anything to do with did or abuse with our parents or doctors.
kt wasnt expecting a professional answer. they wanted comfort and to feel like theyre valid. theyre 15 (forced into being an age slider by tq) and have been having a breakdown for a straight week after finally acknowledging their subsys. which, i might add, has taken quite the toll on our body and rendered us nigh bedridden today.
i get it that ramcoa is a touchy topic but respectfully if someone has misinformation and believes they might be a victim then it's not cool to call them offensive and distasteful.
i might also add that tq is intentionally conditioning kt and their alters into "roles" for their sick enjoyment and to harm other alters with the hopes of eventually creating more and more subsystems with our other littles until it gets to the point where i as the host am rendered completely powerless to stop them.
that response helped us cross one thing off the list, sure, but the tone and wording caused kt to spiral even further and split while reading it.
Hey, you were told what you were going through was real - just not to call it ramcoa. As it isn't. 👍
Maybe. Don't tell a legitimate ramcoa victim point blank telling you (paraphrased) "hey this isn't ramcoa. It is offensive and distasteful to say it is. Dont do that" that it isn't cool to ykno. Say that. It isn't its responsibility to correct misinformation - nor is it other victims' responsibility to do so either. Especially when that person has affirmed what you're going through, while also giving suggestions as to alternative reasons as to why it may be happening.
If you lot are having such severe mental distress that it is leaving you bedridden, take time for yourselves.
Stop engaging in trying to understand and uncover trauma - give your mind and body a break. Give yourself kindness.
If you're in such a bad state that my friends response + my own caused you to split and further spiral, get off of the internet for a little bit.
hellooo (✿^‿^)
ill go by ka for this!
i have to apologize on op's (mo) behalf, they struggle with communication and didn't mean that at all...
i think what mo meant is that kt was hurt by the wording and tone rather than the actual response, because I have kt here in front with me and they actually really appreciate the answer! meaning, they understood and appreciated you telling us that it isn't ramcoa and why, which was extremely helpful!
but mo on the other hand (who, i will say, tends to get a little too angry on others' behalf, so sorry!!) took the bluntness at a personal level. which might be entirely our fault since we struggle with reading tone unless tonetags are used, and they never used them in the initial message.
our vocabulary is very limited and so we tend to come off as mean or offended, and in turn we misinterpreted things a lot. mo thought that saying it was "offensive and distasteful" meant that we were terrible and disgusting for not knowing what to, but ik thats not what you meant! im very sorry both on kt's behalf for immediately jumping to the ramcoa conclusion out of fear and on mo's for unnecessarily looking for drama. and please tell your friend we never meant any harm and they are totally right, we were kinda stupid to jump to that conclusion (ꏿ﹏ꏿ;)
again i have to stress that we all feel extremely guilty for this (though kt won't say it outright bc they don't like outsys communication for... reasons. and mo is petrified at the thought that apologizing might make it worse) and i personally hope you have a wonderful day~! ( ◜‿◝ )♡