Dear prospective bird owner:
So you see us in the pet store or online. Or your friend has a bird. And we look reaaaally cute. It’s true. We’re amazing. But before you start planning our weddings and picking out china, you’ve gotta know a few things about parrots. The basic gist is that we’re not really pets—we’re wild animals. But it’s easier to show than tell, right? Let’s dive in.
1. A bunch of us don’t talk. Sorry.
2. We will poop on your floors. We will poop on your clothes. Sometimes we’ll eat your clothes first, and then we’ll poop on them. We’re not really interested in being trained to go outside like dogs (we’ll fly away, silly), and litter boxes are for actual pets, like cats.
3. What’s yours is ours. What’s ours is ours. We will destroy your stuff for the sole reason that it gives us something to do (we’re super intelligent and need LOTS of stimulation; did we tell you that?). We’re told this is totally cute when it’s something you don’t care about. Apparently less amusing when it’s your social security card? Whatever; we don’t care.
4. We are not decoration (I know; weird, cause we’re gorgeous, right?). But we’re as smart as your toddler, have interests of our own, and some of us are going to outlive you. And unlike that toddler, we are never going to grow out of the terrible 2’s. Never.
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http://www.humanesociety.org/animals/pet_birds/tips/open_letter_to_bird_owner.html