Ain't Nobody Got Time for That

I have worked, and currently work, as a hostess and have a lot to say about it.

[aboutthathostesslife]

Wrapping Silverware

Almost every time I would sit in view of a customer while wrapping silverware at work, they would say “I always wondered who did that!” and then laugh. I’m not sure if they were laughing from the elusive but finally obtained answer to their question or because I was literally unable to fold the top of the napkin over the fork.

Some restaurants only include a fork and a knife wrapped in a napkin, but at the first restaurant I worked in, the silverware consisted of (in this order:( steak knife, butter knife, fork, soup spoon, normal spoon. All wrapped in a normal sized napkin with a tie around it. This is much more difficult than it sounds.

First off, stacking each utensil on top of each other is very difficult. You have to hold them in place with one hand and then fold the napkin in half/pull the top corner down with the other. Then you have to quickly flip it over and roll it together, and then wrap it in a tie.

The servers at my old restaurant were all assigned to wrap fifty sets of silverware each shift they worked. It would make the most sense for them to do this at the very beginning of their shift, since business was much slower during the day, and then we would be set for the dinner rush. But alas, this is not an ideal world, and servers do not wrap their silverware when they should. This would often result in us running out of silverware for guests and me having to run into the back and wrap as fast as my little hands could! Sadly, that is not very fast, as I am a poor silverware wrapper.

Ironically, the only person worse at silverware wrapping was one of out managers. To see who was the worst, we once timed ourselves for three minutes to see who could wrap more. The finished product:

  The larger pile is mine, the smaller pile was his. He got up and sat in front of mine to deceive people into thinking he beat me. This is because managers can not always be trusted–but that is a topic for a different post.

Luckily, at the restaurant I currently work at, the hostesses or hosts do not have to wrap silverware. In fact, I don’t know who does that, but I pity them all the same.

[aboutthathostesslife]

The Rotation

Every restaurant has a floor plan, and the hostess is the queen of that. There are numbered zones, and each waiter or waitress is assigned to a zone. The hostess carefully distributes customers to those numbered zones on a rotation to ensure that every member of the waitstaff gets an equal amount of tables throughout the night, which prevents zones from being skipped or being double sat. This means that everyone will end up making around the same amount of money from tips that night. A hostess that is capable of handling a rotation will keep everyone happy and equal, but a hostess that cannot follow a rotation will be giving more or less money to the servers.

There is very much a reason that every restaurant has a large “PLEASE WAIT TO BE SEATED” sign. They do not want you to seat yourself. They hate it when you seat yourself. Seating you is someone’s job, and no one knows where better to put you than the hostess.

What will happen if you seat yourself/move from your assigned seat:

You will throw off the carefully orchestrated rotation

You will not get service if you are out of zone

If in zone, you will get very poor service

On the seating chart, the table you are currently at will not be marked off, and other customers will be taken to that table as well

You will throw off the carefully orchestrated rotation

I can guarantee you, throwing the rotation out of order is the biggest offense you can commit while dining out. Most of the time, the hostess will ask you “Would you like a table or a booth?” And I bet you’d answer booth, and we are more than happy to take you to a booth. But when the hostess greets you and then asks “Is a table okay?” they are internally having a panic attack, praying to the good lord above that you say “Yes, yes a table is okay, please take us wherever you need to.” For the best experience at the restaurant: please, take the table. The hostess is asking this for a reason. They know where to seat you to ensure you get the best service, and the best service will be given when the rotation stays in order. If there are no booths available in the zone that is next to be seated, please cooperate and take a table. If you say no, a table is not alright, then you are causing all hell to break loose. A server will know that they were just skipped, and all that means to them is less money for the night. The server in the zone you are in now will not have had enough to take of care of their last table fully yet, which means they will be rushed in getting to you. The hostess is on your side and will try to get you the best available seat, but when you do not cooperate with us, we cannot promise good service.

At my place of work, every other guest that comes in says “We’d like to sit next to the salad bar, please.” Well, let me tell you something: there are eight booths near the salad bar, and three tables. What makes you think that you can waltz into a restaurant on a Saturday night, without a reservation, and request a specific section? Chances are that it’s full, and I don’t want to throw the rotation out of whack to accommodate your preference. I’m not going to skip over a server (who I know needs the money) and give you to a server that’s been overworked all night. And to be completely honest, even if it’s not full, I still won’t give you one of those precious salad bar booths, because I’d rather give it to the elderly couple behind you so they don’t have to walk very far—I would gladly screw up the rotation to make them as comfortable as possible. But you, sir, with your fully functioning legs, can walk twenty feet across the room. In a restaurant, you are the guest. Keep that in mind, and please respect the rotation.

[aboutthathostesslife]

Restaurant Life

I'm starting a blog about that restaurant life. I currently work as a hostess and have worked in a few different places, and this blog will be all about experiences there and things to be said about it. c: