Toxic Roleplayers and what to look for.
I know that these are not mutually exclusive. Just because someone does a few of these things doesn’t mean they’re toxic. However, some of the most toxic roleplayers I have ever met have done these things. I’m not bringing names into this, but there are two very specific people that I recently had drama with and many of the examples will refer to them. I also and pulling my knowledge from the 13 years of roleplaying I’ve done.
1. Only roleplays with people new to the fandom
This may not seem odd, but at times this means that the rest of the fandom doesn’t take too kindly to them.
2. Constantly vague blogs
If you see someone vague blog more than they actually roleplay, that’s not a good sign.
3. Frequently changes blogs and aliases.
The one specific person I had the biggest blow up with made 4 different blogs for the same canon character in the short time I knew them. Each time they would change the name they went by. After our fallout, they made two more blogs for the same character with different names both times. This was so the rest of the fandom wouldn’t know who they were.
4. Acts insanely jealous of duplicates.
One person had a rule where they would instantly block duplicates because they were gonna ‘steal from them’. Another openly told me they wanted to steal a duplicate’s about page because of the stylish way they did it. When they eventually made a new blog, they did steal it. This person also came back from hiatus in order to ‘be better than the currently active duplicates’.
This seems like an obvious one. People that do not care about your preferences and have no regard for your opinion are not good. One of these people would constantly send me shippy asks and stuff, despite me telling them I didn’t want to ship our muses. They would send me art and everything. And when I didn’t answer their asks and stuff, they would guilt trip me. They would act like I was a bad friend because I wouldn’t ship with them. I ended up feeling so bad that I did ship with them, despite the ship making me uncomfortable. I saw it as platonic and they forced it to be sexual.
6. Bribes you with graphics.
I love getting graphics from people and I love making them for people. But some people will use such things to attempt to make you forget them treating you like shit.
7. Bringing up personal issues and triggers only during an argument.
Toxic people only refer to their issues when they want to guilt trip you. There’s nothing wrong with someone opening up to a partner or you telling someone when they’ve triggered you by mistake. However, some will insist triggers and such with no prior instances (as in, it never triggered them before or they never mentioned this personal issue) until it is convenient to guilt you.
8. Constantly plays the victim.
When anything happens, it’s unfair to them. They quickly try to turn every situation into abuse towards them. They will often imply self-harm or suicide is going to be tried out in public so people will comfort them and openly hate the people that ‘wronged’ them.
9. Talks about how bad the fandom is constantly.
When someone seems to have a personal beef with everyone in a fandom, be cautious. Sometimes these people will lie to you about people they’ve wronged and get you to block them with no evidence. If you speak to people they dislike, they will quickly have a sob story ready. If it’s one or two people, perhaps it is past drama. But if almost the entire fandom is to be blocked in order to interact with you, maybe you’re the problem.
10. You receive multiple warnings about said person from friends/other partners.
I entered a small fandom and befriended someone. All they did was shit talk the other people in the fandom. Several different people attempted to warn me and I defended them like an idiot because they were nice to me. It didn’t last and I regretted it. I tried to warn someone else about them when they started talking, which was met with hostility. Later on, this person apologized because they did the same damn things to them.
11. Tries to force you to be exclusive.
When someone constantly praises you but talks about how uncomfortable duplicates make them to the point that they convince you to drop partners. Red flag. This person wants to isolate you.
12. Uses your illnesses/triggers/personal history against you.
During most of this drama, I was relapsing hardcore into my illness and self-harm. I had one person attempt to guilt me because I wasn’t “excited enough about the stuff they sent me.” this was the same person that was forcing me to ship with them. They basically tried to use the fact that I was suicidal in an attempt to make me feel even worse about not enjoying the shippy stuff. I also one time confessed something bad I had done to a partner and they attempted to blackmail me into smutting with them by claiming they would tell an irl friend about it since I rped with my friend and people knew we lived together at that point.
13. Has loyal friends that always seem to harass people they don’t like and make them the victim.
A girl followed one of these people without realizing that the mun hated her because they were friends on their old blog. When she asked why they were ignoring her, they sent all their friends to tell her how toxic and shitty she was for ‘harassing him’, even though she wasn’t.
14. Sends others to fight their battles for them.
One of these people sent their boyfriend to attack me. They wildly accused me of things I hadn’t done. I thought they sent the message to the wrong person. This person commonly sent their friends after people.
15. Posts constant callouts for every minor thing with NO proof or anything.
No caps, no nothing. Just their word.
16. Accuses you of being toxic.
Someone claimed that I was toxic for ‘only writing with them to get followers’, despite the fact that I followed them when they jumped from blog to blog. All the things they ended up accusing me of were false, which led me to believe all the previous drama they were in were probably all bullshit too.
17. Claims you are nothing without them.
“I made your theme/icons/header. Without me your blog would be ugly.” “You only have partners because I write with you.” “Nobody else would write with you.”
18. Makes everything about them.
If you’re sick and post that you don’t feel like coming online, it was a personal attack on them! Break up with your s/o and post about it. Liar! It’s actually a vague about them! Bad day at work/school? MUST BE A COVER UP TO SHIT TALK THEM.
19. Sends anon hate to themselves or claims they receive hate with no proof that they actually do, i/e never capping or publishing it.
This is more common than I thought.
20. Accuses everyone of being jealous/ripping them off.
One person accused me of stealing a verse from them, despite the fact that the verse was simply a pre-story verse regarded within the canon. Some people accuse duplicates with any similar ideas as “thieves”.
