Bruce Wayne, tired, needing a break from the young!batkids. Setting the kids free on the watch tower: Okay rats, go find your fathers. I need a break
Jason, hugging Diana's leg: Hi daddy :)
Diana: Why is your child calling me father?
Bruce, bullshitting his way through this: You see, my species views trust as something worthy of mating. So when I begin to trust you, out child appears.
Dinah: Whose is this one??
Stephanie, who just squished herself between her and ollie: :)
Bruce: I dont know which of yours she is, she just doesnt shut up and is blonde.
Dinah: DONT BE MEAN TO MY DAUGHTER YOU BITCH
Oliver: You know Mia's been asking about having a a new sister....
Hal: Why isn't mine white?
Barry, currently hugging tim: You can't ask that dude
Hal: I'm just saying, all of yours match. How can I expect this to be mine and not John's. Us green lanterns all look alike to you.
Duke: But dad, we don't share any. I was made from mommy's love
Hal: See, he says you love me. Load of bullshit.
Hal: Martian, please tell me you can see through this
J'ohn, currently petting Cassandras hair: She can read people without my powers <3
Bruce: Duckduck, show your dad your powers
Duke: *Creates a little light construct of a dinosaur.*
Hal: Really, a Sinestro????
Bruce: look at his finger, no ring
Hal: I changed my mind, he is my baby. I am the strongest green lantern. Kyle can suck it. I made a baby who doesnt need a ring.
Barry: So how do we know this one is mine then? He isnt blond.
Barry: Good enough explanation for me, I'll tell Iris I'm sorry but im keeping him
Tim, who just wants to collect dna: :)
Damian, who was promised a seahorse: I like bogs, fish as friends, not food. And also spears :|
Clark, giving Bruce the silent treatment:
Bruce: Kal, what's wrong?
Clark: I've known you the longest, and I don't get a baby? Everyone else does? Am I not good enough for you????? 🥺
Bruce: He isnt here because he is an adult, *talking into com* N, come here your dad wants you
Dick, coming over to Clark: Hi pops, I'm Nightwing
Clark: you named him after mE 🥹🥰😍