The price of Freedom

[aconstantstateofdecay]

bigbadbrcnncr:

Micki couldn’t do anything but stare as her eyes began to water. She couldn’t believe that her best friend, the person she cared about more than anyone in the world was back around her, back in her life. She nearly sobbed when he wrapped his arms around her,  instantly hugging him back and holding him close. She didn’t want to let go, not ever again. There was a time when she couldn’t imagine a world without her best friend and there was a hole in her heart that developed when he left. “I didn’t think I would ever see you again either. I thought.. I don’t know what I thought. I missed you so much, Ira.” She sniffled, trying to maintain her facade of calmness but it was cracking as she hugged him. She shook her head, pulling back ever so slightly to look him in the eyes. “No. That wasn’t your fault. You didn’t want to leave, I know that.” She hugged him once more, head resting on his shoulder. “I can’t believe I get to see you again.”

For the first time in a very long time, Ira felt warmth radiate from his body. He hadn’t made true physical contact that he wanted with a person in years. He couldn’t remember the last time he hugged anyone. He gave her another tight squeeze, as if to make sure she was truly there before he let go of her, keeping his hands on his shoulders for a moment to look at her. “Thank you -- that makes me feel a lot better. I never got to say goodbye and it’s eaten me up every day since. I had just started to move on, but my life is very grey without you in it. I need my best friend. I have to say, though -- I’m a little surprised to find you here. I’ll admit I’m not upset. It gives me some comfort that I needed but -- this doesn’t exactly seem like your kind of scene.” It wasn’t his either, but, again, it was better than his alternative.

[aconstantstateofdecay]

ethanxmcqueen:

Ethan waved a hand dismissively, “Nah it’s all good, I’d be happy to show you where to go,” It sort of fell under his branch of work anyway, recruiters did often find themselves as tour guides and assistants, help be that friendly face to help people get oriented and settle in, “Hey Ira, oh really? Ah– That’s fair enough, not everyone’s a social master and that’s okay. I’m Ethan.” He flashed him a smile before pointing in the general direction of the store, “We’re headed this way.” 

Ira began to move in the direction that the stranger - Ethan - pointed in, but he stopped in his tracks a few steps in. “Nevermind,” His breath caught in his throat, holding it as an admission escaped instead. “I know I won’t go into the store once we get there. I don’t want to waste your time. I don’t really need cigarettes as much as I want them.” Exhaling the breath he’d been holding, his shoulders tensed up again, caving forward as he shoved his hands into his hoodie’s pockets.

[aconstantstateofdecay]

clarkdavis:

The guy’s reaction startled Clark a bit, not quite expecting that response. “Oh, right, I didn’t mean to scare you or anything.” He spoke, taking a step back, figuring that a little space might calm him down. “I totally understand, man, you don’t have to explain yourself.” Clark couldn’t deny that he was curious what happened to Ira that made him so jumpy. Part of him wondered if the initiative had been unfairly hard om him, like the stories he heard, yet tried to ignore. “It’s nice to meet you, man. You sure you don’t that pack of cigarettes? I hardly ever smoke anyway, only when I’m stressed. I’m a stressmoker.” He shrugged with a chuckle. 

Ira took a moment to settle down. He fought his instinct to bolt, inwardly determined to be something resembling human. Interacting with others was keeping him grounded. The peace, he knew, would be temporary before Talia tested his moral threshold again, but the chance to be a problem for somebody in the compound still remained high even without her tampering. He ran the risk of taking another mutant’s power and becoming a very different person if he let that happen. Having power was addicting and a flip switched on in his brain. He still didn’t know how to describe it, but it was consuming. “I could actually, yeah. There are worse things to be addicted to. I’m the same way and this place is... a little stressful. I’ve got no complaints, but it’s definitely taking some getting used to.”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

katarinaolsson:

New recruits were always fearful, that much was true. But Katarina found solace in tuning their fear out. After all, most came to the compound in worse for wear circumstances. Surely, there’s no point in hashing out that entire debacle. Life is all about here and now, the shapeshifter justified with an astute nod. So instead, she purses her lips against the cigarette and enjoys a long breathe of her cigarette. “Parties have cigarettes though. And wine, and cute girls… Or boys?” She suggests, talking as if they were old friends gossiping and gabbing after months apart. “What do you like to do then?”

“I’ve never really been to a real party, other than the ones my parents hosted - I never enjoyed them. I was the trophy son so there was always a lot of pressure on me to make them look good. I was alright at it for awhile. It’s just not something I can do anymore,” he shrugged, a degree of apathy in his features, as he took a long hit from his cigarette, enjoying the warmth it left against his lips. He thought about her question, only having talked about the subject of his romantic preferences with his best friend. “I think men and women are both beautiful, but I’ve only ever been able to bond with men. Well, one boy, anyway. Most of the women that used to be in my life were like sisters to me, so I assume that I like boys.” Playing with the cigarette in his fingers, a smile hid at the edge of his lips and his eyes lightened a little. Most of his executions at talking to people at the compound had still left him uncomfortable and anxious in the end. Very few had gone the way he’d hoped they would. He was not always able to handle people. “I like this. I haven’t had a conversation that I was comfortable having in years. Not since my brother and best friend were around. Thank you.”

[washwest-deactivated20180509]

[zitawalker]

Mr. Robot (2015)

[aconstantstateofdecay]

taliashunter:

“Maybe you can. Maybe that’s something I can help you with, Ira. You’ll never know unless you allow me to try some experimentation out on you.” She quirked a brow. “You couldn’t handle this kind of power and you damn well know it.” If she was dangerous with this ability, she couldn’t imagine how dangerous he would be. She nodded, thinking about his brother for a moment. “What did you say his name was? Perhaps I could look for him. Or have someone else look for him.”

Talia shrugged, brushing off the idea that anyone was truly harmless. She arched a perfectly manicured brow at that statement. “And how is that my problem? Am I making you feel insane, Ira?”

“Then do it. It’s not like I have a lot to lose,” he replied, apathy settling in a little too much into his decisions today. "I control them better ever since you helped get me out of the hospital and off of medication. I’m definitely not perfect, but there is a difference because I can use powers purposefully when I have them now. I don’t deny what you can do. It’s what you have me do to test them that I have a problem with.” And yet he got used to the sight of blood so fast. Whether it was his or someone else’s, he never flinched. He ignored her statement about not being able to control her power. While that may have been true, he couldn’t help but want to give her a taste of her own medicine.  “ I’d appreciate it if you kept my brother out of this. I’m fine if I never see him again. He’s got his own life to live now. It doesn’t need to revolve around me anymore.”

“I don’t think it’s necessarily you,but I have moments when I feel like I wouldn’t have left the hospital had I been given proper care and not just medicated into sedation. If it is you messing with my head, knock it off. You’ll get a lot more out of me if I don’t feel like I’m losing my damn mind.” He chose not to say it, but his journal was proof. He wrote in it every day, multiple times a day, and he was missing time. Not only that, but some pages were just full of black marker scribbles that he had no recollection of doing. The evidence was there, but he couldn’t tell whether it was another mutant’s tampering, or just him. He really hoped it wasn’t the latter.

[aconstantstateofdecay]

taliashunter:

Talia rolled her eyes, not in the mood to deal with his self deprecation today. He was a monster, in her eyes; though if anyone understood her enough they would realize that she was, in fact, the real monster. “Fair enough then. For the record, I think she’s rather sweet- a bit too sweet for my taste but that’s to be expected at this point. I hope you don’t cause her too much pain.”

She rolled her eyes once more, “My evil is perfectly well contained; yours, however, is a different story entirely. You need a better grasp of control, Ira. That’s all I’m suggesting.”

“The pain’s the price you have to pay. I can’t change how much it hurts when I rip a person’s powers out of their body. You should let me try it on you, sometime,” Ira said, his dark eyes challenging her. “My brother told me that it feels like a really intense acupuncture session - except the needles don’t just stop at skin level.”

“I’m perfectly harmless when I don’t have another power,” he pointed out, taking a long hit from his cigarette before expelling the smoke from his nostrils like an irritated bull. “I’m even better when I don’t feel like I’m out of my damn mind.”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

bigbadbrcnncr:

Micki usually kept to herself at the compound. Or at least she had been doing that since she got there. She didn’t know anyone, she didn’t trust anyone. She was alone, again. She was about to pull out a cigarette herself when she heard a voice that was just a touch too familiar to be a newcomer in her life. She glanced up, recognizing her friend almost immediately. She had been hoping he wouldn’t have to endure the torture that is the compound. But, of course, neither of them were that lucky. “Ira?” She asked, tears stinging at her eyes after a moment. 

Ira looked up, and  really looked at the brunette girl he’d ask for a cigarette. He starred at her for a second before it fully registered in his head who she was. It was the girl who had helped him through some of the worst years of his life. His best friend. Micki.

For a moment, he did not speak. Just starred at her with jaw hanging open while she became misty-eyed. He didn’t say anything. He couldn’t. Instead, he just did the only thing he could do, that he wouldn’t do with anyone else. Ira reached forward, wrapping his arms around her tightly to hug her instinctively. The tightness in his chest loosened and he exhaled the breath he’d been holding. “I didn’t think I was ever going to see you again,” he finally said, overwhelmed by her presence there. There was so little for him to complain about, now. If he got Micki back, that meant he could get his brother back one day, too. He would do whatever Talia said to do if this was what he got out of his freedom. “I’m so sorry I left.”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

taliashunter:

“Oh, so you don’t want to meet the person before hand, see if she’s a good person? Maybe have the option to change your mind?” She asked, not really all that curious about the other mutant’s answer. She quirked an eyebrow waiting for him to speak once more. She smiled once he agreed, he was always her favorite lab rat. She had a thing about messing with the dangerous ones. “Excellent.”

She shrugged, “Why do I have to get anything out of it? I could just be doing it from the goodness of my heart.”

“Not really, no,” Ira shrugged his shoulders, reaching into his pocket to pull out a crumbled pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He flipped open the lid and slid out one to slip between his lips. He cupped one hand over it to protect the lighter flame from blowing out while he lit it. “If she’s a bad person, then they don’t need to have a power to make them worse. If she’s a good person, cool. I’m used to this by now. Please let me take someone’s shit power away from them to give them a break. That’s about the only thing I’m good for anymore.”

“I seriously doubt that. You’re doing it for camouflage, then, if there’s nothing else. Was your evil showing a little too much?”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

lewisxmon:

Lewis couldn’t help the surprise that painted his features. Whatever he’d been expecting to hear, it hadn’t been that. It didn’t sound so terrible right now, but judging by the other’s tone he must not enjoy having that ability. Lewis could sympathize with that. “Oh. I’m sorry you got stuck here, man. That doesn’t sound too bad in the end, though. There are worse things you could be able to do.” He understood the fear behind having powers nonetheless but didn’t share his secret with the other. “Nice to meet you. Even if it was in a less-than-stellar way. I’m Lewis. Are you an agent?”

“You would think that would be the case,” Ira commented, “but there are worse places to be stuck in than here, so at the moment, I don’t have many complaints.” It was definitely better than a small room in a mental facility that was being bribed by his adopted father to keep him there heavily medicated. This place was like paradise compared to the white limbo he’d been stuck in the last couple of years. “You saved me from the roar of my own thoughts, so it’s okay. Really. I’m still a trainee agent, but -- I have some experience with fighting.” Attacking was a better word for it, but that hurt too much for him to admit. There was too much out of his control. “If you don’t mind me asking, where were you going in such a hurry?”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

katarinaolsson:

Despite what many thought, the compound was large in size and populous. Although Katarina’s position as a trainer with a photographic memory made her astute to everyone, that’s as far as it went. A once-over of the fidgety boy in front of her, and she’s resolve some shaking up would do him some good. After all, that’s what made her a great (if not unorthodox) trainer. “So I’ve heard,” she opens the pack of cigarettes, plucking out two and extending one to Ira’s reach. She places her glass of wine on the table, exchanging it for a lighter and allowing the nicotine to burn. “Katarina,” she confirms, sliding the lighter his way. “Pretty well known for being the life of the party, though…” She glances around, before leaning over conspiratorially and grinning ear-to-ear. “Not much of a party around here. What do you think?”

Ira’s lips tightened, unease settling underneath his skin by her comment. He considered leaving now, but he hadn’t had a cigarette in years and that was truthfully a driving factor in the fact that he was still sitting there. Leaning forward, he reached his hand out and quickly took the cigarette from her before he pulled away and patiently waited for her to light her own cigarette before she passed it to him. “I’m afraid not much of a party-er. I’m not a fan of crowds. Or loud noises. I have a really long list of why I don’t like parties, actually.”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

katarinaolsson:

Sunday afternoons were a write off, Katarina was convinced. Then again, the brunette was convinced any time after two in the afternoon was a write off. Hardly the desired discipline for an agent and trainer, but the compound’s senior leadership turned a blind eye. Her invaluable ability, familiar legacy, and unorthodox way of connecting with new agents made up for it. For you see, despite her wise cracks – she had a way of lightening even the most grueling of situations. She rarely pried, but acted as a blunt sound board for new recruits. From the corner of her eye, she sees the newer addition approaching her. Barely looking up from her half-empty wine glass, she gestures to the seat in front of her. “Have a seat,” digging into the pocket of her jacket, she pulls out a pack of Marlboro Gold and a matching lighter. “You’re new ‘round here, right?”

Ira hesitated when the woman offered him a seat, suddenly unsure of whether he made the right decision in choosing this woman to speak to.  Too personal too fast, but he had to acknowledge the fact that he needed to be uncomfortable to get better at interactions.  He was too uncertain of the honesty of his caretaker to not try to enjoy the freedom that he was given before it could be taken from him again. With reluctance, he slipped into the chair across from her, poised to run out of habitual paranoia. “For the most part,” he admitted, his jaw setting tighter, “I’ve been here. I just don’t get out much. My name’s Ira. Who are you?”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

clarkdavis:

As usual, Clark was distracted by the many ideas and fascinations that went on in his head. Just when you thought you had seen it all, a mutant appeared with an ability that could just blow your mind. That thought lead to his sister, also a mutant working at this place. He hadn’t seen her in a while and he’d guess that he wouldn’t see her soon either. Clark was pulled from his thoughts when he was asked for a cigarette. He automatically reached for the pockets of his jeans, though knowing he didn’t have any. “Sorry man, don’t have any on me right now. But I got some stashed away at my workplace, I was on my way there anyway.” He shrugged casually. Clark looked at the man again. “I don’t think we’ve met, have we? I’m Clark.” He smiled a bit, reaching out his hand, but quickly pulled his hand back again. “Sorry, I forgot my hands are kinda dirty with grease.” Clark laughed.

Ira exhaled the breath he’d been holding the moment he tried to speak to the man.  “That’s alright. Thank you, though,” he said simply, dropping his shoulders as he relaxed a little until the stranger introduced himself and tried to reach out to shake his hand. He jumped back quickly, eyes widening with a genuine moment of fear flashing across his face and he shot back a few steps to distance himself from the man.  “Please don’t touch me,” he snapped, voice trembling. Starring at the man - Clark - for a few seconds, he tried to shake off his skittishness, forcing himself to take a deep breath to calm himself. “I’m sorry -- sorry. You’re fine.  I just -- I don’t like being touched. That’s not your fault. But I - I’m Ira. I’ve been here for a little while but I haven’t gotten out much yet.”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

danixlarson:

People watching was one of Dani’s hobbies, and since she was in a totally new environment, she indulged in it. She had been so focused watched a group of people across the way, that she hadn’t noticed someone next to her. The sudden presence cause her to jump, just slightly, “Oh shit,” she looked over to him, her brain processing his question, “Uh, yeah, maybe, I think.” Dani leaned down, reaching her hand for her bag, simply phasing her hand through the side. She searched for a moment before pulling her hand back out, a pack and lighter in hand, “Here, you can actually have them. I don’t smoke myself much, I just swip-uh, got them from someone else who didn’t want them,” Dani shrugged as she held them out. 

“I didn’t mean to startle you, sorry,” Ira apologized, aware of how little he liked to be startled. He was anxious and paranoid enough for everyone there, so it was strangle and a little disconcerting for him the person to do the startling. As he watched her hand pass through the fabric of her bag as if it were merely an illusion, he blinked a few times and physically moved away from her by a foot. “If you wanted them enough to take them from someone, then you must have some inclination to want them. Thank you, but you keep them. Or give them back to the person you took them from. I’ve never met a person who just had a pack of cigarettes on them that didn’t want them.”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

ethanxmcqueen:

The question had him turning to face who spoke and a shrug hefted from his shoulders, “Sorry to let you down bud, don’t smoke,” He answered honestly, “But if you go swing by the store they’ll have everything you need.” Ethan gave him a good look over, he didn’t recognise him, so he figured he must’ve been a newbie to the compound - generally the safest bet to place, “You know where you’re going?” He asked simply, “I can show you if you like?” There was also the matter that Ethan was a horrible do-gooder who liked to make people feel welcome, even if they’d been around for years. 

Ira swallowed hard when the man responded, not really caring so much that he didn’t have a cigarette. He hadn’t smoked since the last time he saw Micki. This was just something he’d seen in enough movies to strike up conversation. He was good at mimicking, to a degree. “I don’t mean to bother you, but could you?” He asked, smiling reflexively from the dopamine he got from successfully starting a conversation. Like his old therapist used to say, ‘It’s all about the little victories.’ “My name’s Ira. I’ve seen you before, but I don’t -- I’m not always strong with words. Nor do I really get out much, but it’s better than not at all. ”

[aconstantstateofdecay]

He was going to talk to someone today. 

Ira had been at the compound for a few weeks, but the overwhelm from the size and population of the compound was enough to keep him either shut up in a room or sit so quietly in a corner that no one would notice him. Instinct told him that he preferred it that way, but he’d been alone for so long and now he finally had an unsupervised opportunity to make a friend. Old habits died hard and his social skills were definitely stunted, but after a solid week of trying to get himself to say a word to a stranger that looked nice, a full sentence managed to leave his mouth. “I-I don’t suppose you have a cigarette, do you? Or know where I could get some?” His heart pounded in his chest nervously, but he celebrated his small victory in his head. He didn’t have to be alone anymore.