Welcome! My name's Amber, and this is my blog for all my random little Stardew Valley thoughts that I wanted to be able to find later.
On this blog I'll be rambling about my stardew ocs, some headcanons, perhaps some fic ideas I have - or ideas that I maybe can't fit together into a coherent fic, and (once it's released on console) I'll be posting about some of my farm playthroughs.
Now, I could do this on my main blog (@ambersky0319), however, that blog is a mess that has accumulated for the past 6 years and if I posted any of this there, I would never find a single thing ever again. Hence this blog!
More refined art and fics related to Stardew Valley will likely be reblogged here, but most of the time, you'll be able to find them over on @amberskywrites and @ambersky-art
And I'm always up to talk about this game! So feel free to send me your thoughts or tag this blog - hell even tag me in posts about your own farmers or jump into my ask box or DMs to gush about them, I'm always happy to interact and listen! ^^
Alex is lamenting about how little he reads and thinks himself lesser because of it. Arapaima refuses to let a friend talk themself down like that.
Alex startles when there's a knock on his door, turning as it opens a little. He relaxes when Arapaima pokes his head in, and smiles, but he can't quite find it in himself to muster the excitement he usually feels to see his friend.
"Oh, hey Paima. Come on in." Alex tilts his head in a welcoming gesture, stuffing his hands into his pockets while Arapaima slips inside and closes the door behind him. Alex frowns again at his bookshelf, lined with books he's never touched. Most of them were gifts over the years—and some of them he knows were meant to be insulting, but he kept them anyway because he knew he'd never get around to actually reading them.
Arapaima settles next to Alex and places a hand on his shoulder, tapping thrice when Alex sighs. Alex glances at him. "Something wrong?"
"Ah- no, not really." But Alex can't help but sigh again, turning away from the shelf so he can look at Arapaima. He leans back against the wood and takes a hand out of his jacket to rub at his neck. "It's just… all these books, and I haven't read any of them. Not a single one."
The young fisherman hums quietly, his eyes flitting over the bookcase before returning to Alex. "So?"
"Well… what if that's a problem? I mean… it feels like now you need to know everything to get anywhere in life. To get a decent job, to travel… can't make a name, a life for yourself if you don't know anything." Alex slumps down to the floor, resting his head against the wood. Arapaima frowns at him, slowly lowering himself to the floor as well and shuffling so their knees touch. Alex laughs humorlessly. "I'm basically worthless…"
He doesn't know where that comes from, it almost startles Alex, the words slipping from his mouth. He doesn't know why he tells Arapaima this. It's just…
What worth does he have in this world if he's not smart? Being strong isn't enough anymore. He knows this.
A sharp pain explodes in his forearm and he jerks away, hissing as he whips his head up and rubs the sore spot. His eyes are already narrowed when he looks at Arapaima. "What the fuck was—"
Arapaima's glaring at him, far more hostile than Alex is certain he's ever been looked at. The stare simultaneously makes him feel chided and furious. Before he can try saying something again for the pinch — and fuck if Arapaima didn't just bruise him like it was nothing — Arapaima's hands are moving.
"Don't say that about yourself," Arapaima signs. "You're a lot of things, Alex, but you're not worthless."
Alex roles his eyes, still soothing the sore spot on his arm. He looks down at where the sting is as he says: "Oh, yeah? Then what am I?"
Fingers hook under his chin and tilt his head up, and Alex glares again. But the anger on Arapaima's face has dissipated a little, and when Alex tries to look away again he taps his cheek three times and tilts Alex's face towards him again.
"You're strong," he begins. "You're kind, determined, resilient. You're smart."
"No I'm not," Alex huffs.
"You are!" Arapaima reaches out to grasp Alex by the shoulders, getting to his knees and giving Alex a slight shake. "You were the first person to learn sign here."
Alex frowns. "Vincent learned before me. And Willy—" Arapaima shakes his head.
"Willy travels and had Deaf friends before. Vincent could pick up signs easily because children learn languages easier, but it took a while until he was able to get a teacher and actually learn. You started learning before him."
"That doesn't make me smart, or anything though! Anyone can learn it, and it'd be dumb as hell to not learn it when you only sign." Alex scoffs, "I wasn't going to rely on the other farmers to constantly translate for you."
"You also know a lot of anatomy. You know exactly which muscles you're exercising when you workout."
"Lots of people know anatomy too. You know a lot of it—"
"Lifeguard training."
"—and Kali and Sour Patch also know a lot of it. Nevermind Dr. Harvey and Maru also knowing all sorts of anatomy."
Arapaima huffs this time, rocking back to sit on his heels. "Harvey and Maru are the town doctors. Sour Patch just likes learning as much as it can about anything, they are an anomaly. And Kali was in med school for a while but ditched it because it wasn't for her. None of those are normal people."
Every time he speaks, it feels like he's grasping at straws with Arapaima here. Why doesn't he just understand that he's wrong? Alex isn't— there's no way he's smart. But with each defense Arapaima gives to why he is Alex struggles to refute it and… and part of him doesn't want to. But it still— it doesn't feel believable. Even with Arapaima getting so heated about Alex's supposed intelligence. Which… which is odd.
Alex sags back, looks up at Arapaima through his bangs. "Why are you so mad about this?" He doesn't think he's seen Arapaima so mad over something, now that he thinks about it. There was the one time Penny had tried helping Grandpa and gone about it… in not the best way, and any time someone made a rude comment about Sour Patch's more [lascivious] lifestyle. But this felt beyond even those instances. "It's not like I'm insulting you. You're ridiculously smart, both book-wise and survival wise. And don't try to deny it, you've gone on enough rants about fish for me to know."
"For starters, I don't like people insulting my friends." Alex opens his mouth and Arapaima shakes his head. "Nope, even self-deprecating insults count. Not allowed when you're my friend. I won't allow my friends to be insulted."
Alex rolls his eyes, but feels a smile tug at his lips. It's both ridiculously annoying that that's a hill Arapaima will seemingly die on, and also touching to apparently have someone want to defend him so fiercely. "For starters?" Alex repeats. "What's the other thing, then?"
Arapaima pauses at that, and he averts his eyes. Alex blinks as the man so confident before falters in what to say, hesitating. Before Alex can ask why, Arapaima's taking a deep breath and starts signing without looking at Alex.
"I know what it's like for people to think you're stupid. Incapable." His face scrunches up in disgust at the word, and Alex frowns.
"What… what do you mean?"
"I hated talking even when I was little. But everyone knew I wasn't Deaf — I passed all the hearing tests. I just refused to talk when I was little. Just as many people then didn't understand why as they do now." Alex didn't like where this was going, sitting up straighter and leaning into Arapaima's space. Arapaima glanced at him out the corner of his eye, then returned his gaze to Alex's bookshelf. "Because I didn't talk, a lot of people, a lot of teachers didn't think I was learning how to read. Didn't think I could understand the words even if I could hear, because I wouldn't parrot them back. Some of them just didn't even bother after I refused to talk and put me with 'difficult children.' It… set me back a lot."
"But… but you're so smart now, and you— even if you were Deaf you could still learn!"
"I know that," Arapaima signs, smiling sadly at Alex. "and my family knows it, and you know that. But not everyone in the world realizes it."
"So you, what? Had to learn things on your own?"
Alex's frown deepens when Arapaima shakes his head. "My parents started homeschooling me, when they realized. And it's not like I hadn't been learning. I was, even if my teachers didn't believe it. But there was also a lot of stuff I just… never really learned. Because when you're a child constantly hearing that you're stupid…"
… you believe it.
Alex pulls his knees to his chest and deflates. "I just… how do you stop believing it?"
Arapaima tilts his head to the bookshelf, and reaches past Alex to grab a book. He holds it out to Alex, tapping his knees with it until he takes it into hand. Psychology: Anatomy of the Mind. Alex forgot he even had this book.
"You keep telling yourself that you're not, and build on your strengths. Do you want to read more?"
Alex hums, looking down at the book again. It doesn't look too dense. Arapaima signing about how well he knows anatomy flickers in his mind. He bites back a chuckle—Arapaima probably chose this book on purpose, then.
"… Yeah."
When he looks back up, Arapaima's smiling brighter — a familiar smile, a comforting one. "Great, because I know you can do it." The words send a bolt of confidence flickering through Alex, and he returns the smile with a grin of his own.
Warnings/Content: Non-sexual intimacy, Lack of communication
Summary:
Waking up for yet another busy day, Arapaima gets caught off-guard with Alex seeming annoyed with him, even if he says he's fine. He drops it for the morning but, unable to stop thinking about it, heads back to the farm early in search of his husband to figure out what's wrong.
It helps when you talk about things, they both come to realize.
Arapaima had grown used to rising with the sun — he'd been doing it before even coming to Pelican Town, a habit built with taking up odd jobs around the beach that needed to be found early in the morning, or fishing trips that relied on using every bit of daylight to the fullest. Since coming to the valley, it certainly became harder, with how exhausting farm work was in comparison, but he liked to think he took the change a bit better than the others.
He was still growing used to sharing a bed with someone again, waking up curled around Alex or with Alex wrapped around him, and having to make sure he didn't disturb him too much. It rarely happened, as Alex was also an early riser and sometimes beat even Arapaima out of bed. He was surprised every time, but happy to see Alex up and about anyways, and they'd usually share breakfast before Arapaima had to go deal with his section of the farm and work on some of his and the other farmers' goals for the week. They'd recently discovered what Willy called Ginger Island and how in disrepair some of it was, and that had been eating at all of their time. So every moment with Alex, Arapaima cherished.
Today was one of the days Arapaima woke up with his arms circling a waist, face buried in soft brown hair. Taking a deep breath, Arapaima reveled in the warmth of his husband, not quite wanting to rise just yet. He was half tempted to go back to sleep, or pretend to just so he could stay cuddled against Alex for another hour or two. A crowing from outside, loud and shrill, made him flinch and he stifled a groan into the back of Alex's neck. A glance at the clock on their wall, and Arapaima sighed quietly, blinking the sleep from his eyes. He needed to get up.
He shifted carefully, slowly pulling his arm from under Alex, sitting up reluctantly and scrubbing at his face. He looked down at Alex and smiled slightly, watching as the light of the sunrise slowly filtered in and crept up Alex's face, painting him a golden hue.
Gently, Arapaima leaned down, brushing Alex's bangs away from Alex's face to press a kiss to his forehead.
He must not have been as gentle as he intended, because Alex's face scrunches up and he turns his head into the pillow, a low groan ripping from his throat. "Nnnghh… what is it?" he asks, turning back to look at Arapaima over his shoulder.
Arapaima smiles sheepishly. "Sorry, didn't mean to wake you. Gonna head out now, go back to sleep," he signed, carding a hand gently through Alex's hair.
Alex blinks at him before sighing heavily, eyes closing tight and turning back into the pillow. "Mmmmf… fine, see you…"
The tone is one Arapaima hasn't heard before — and he frowns, brow creasing as he stares down at Alex. Alex sounded almost… petulant. He wracks his brain, trying to figure out why Alex may sound like that but drawing up blank. Arapaima worries at his lip, staring at the back of Alex's head before slipping off the bed and rounding to Alex's side, wide awake himself now and crouching to get a better look at his husband.
He taps Alex's shoulder lightly, three times, and he watches Alex's face twist into one of mild annoyance — and okay, Arapaima did feel bad about not letting him sleep more but he would be thinking about the tone all day — before opening his eyes again.
"Yeah?"
"Something up?" Arapaima signed, eyes locked with Alex's, concern meeting a tired frustration.
Alex swallowed slightly and his eyes flicked away. When he returned them to Arapaima, the frustration had disappeared and he feigned a smile — Arapaima's concern only grew, seeing how the smile didn't reach Alex's eyes. "'m fine," he said quietly, the smile dropping as he seemed to realize Arapaima wasn't buying it. "Just… go get your breakfast and get to your work, I know you're busy today. I'll see you tonight."
"Are you sure? I can stay home, we can—"
"Just go, Paima. Promise, I am fine," Alex huffed, offering a more convincing smile and reaching out to pull Arapaima close, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. Arapaima let him, closing his eyes and melting into the kiss, and when Alex let him go he watched as Alex resettled into the pillows to supposedly go back to sleep.
Arapaima lingered anyway, but Alex didn't stir or say anything else, and reluctantly Arapaima got to his feet to get ready for the day. It felt more like going through the motions, and he grabbed a pack of field snacks and goat cheese instead of breakfast, too distracted for an appetite. He glanced in on Alex one last time, but Alex was still curled up in bed and breathing evenly, so Arapaima finally left to go meet the others.
-
They were skipping the island today, but Kali and Sour Patch had begged Aster and him to join them in the mines because they'd had the bright idea of accepting a challenge from Mr. Qi in that weird room the guy had on the island, and it had messed with the mines. Arapaima had wanted nothing to do with it, but when Kali and Sour Patch were both certain they'd need the help, he knew it was bad. They worked through their most pressing chores of the day before setting out to make the most of their time in the mines. Arriving revealed a blue hue to the caverns, and Aster borrowed a shield and rapier from Kali while Sour Patch gave Arapaima a slingshot armed with explosive ammo and a dagger just in case anything did get too close. And down into the depths they went — the elevator out of commission once again as they slowly worked their way down.
Arapaima was struggling to focus, even as he tried to keep the thought of Alex's words and tone this morning from his mind. He'd taken hits he usually wouldn't and not just because of whatever Mr. Qi had done to these creatures that made them stupidly strong and fast. It was enough for the others to notice, his work even sloppier than it usually was.
He flinched as he blasted a slime back a little too close to where Kali stood, and she jumped back to avoid the explosive, stumbling over a rock and just barely catching herself on the wall. Aster cursed under their breath just as the explosive truly went off, bracing their shield in front of Kali and themself.
"Think we can take a break," Sour Patch called, wiping sweat from its brow but only succeeding in smearing blue slime across its forehead. "You definitely need one," it said pointedly, head tilting to Arapaima. He rubbed his face before dragging his hand to the back of his neck, sighing heavily and nodding.
The climb back up was swift as they dodged whatever creatures they had missed on their first go-around, just aiming to get lower and collect resources. Breaching the surface once more was a relief, and Arapaima collapsed against one of the chests, sinking to the ground and hanging his head. He listened as the others climbed up, the silence palpable and he could feel the weight of their eyes on him.
Eventually, he heard Aster sigh heavily and plop down next to him. "Aight, spill, what's going on?"
Arapaima looked up, resting his head on his knees for a moment as he glanced to Aster, then the other two. Sour Patch was leaning against a furnace as Kali began loading it, arms crossed and looking at him expectantly.
"You're not usually this distracted, even in the mines," Kali added as she stood back up, dusting the coal off her hands. "Like, I know you usually hate it, but damn was that rough." Aster shot her a glare.
"Kali…" they huffed.
"No, no, she's right," he signed, stopping Aster from telling Kali off — he was well-used to now how blunt she could be, appreciated it most of the time. "I was screwing up a lot. Sorry. I just… this morning was weird, and I can't stop thinking about Alex."
Sour Patch's face scrunched up slightly — not quite in annoyance, but something more like confusion and reflexive disgust (which he was used to seeing on its face anytime he or Aster talked about their partners, and knew it wasn't personal). "Okay, I know when you guys first started… dating… and then got married, you were more distracted and, I dunno, that's understandable because you were in that honeymoon phase, but what's got you so messed up now?" Sour Patch asked.
Arapaima threw his hands up, frustration finally breaking across his face. "I don't even know! He just seemed… really annoyed this morning? He said he was fine but he didn't sound fine."
"I mean, you do get up early. Could be he didn't wanna get up just yet? I know Elliott can get pretty grumpy if I wake him up early on accident, and he doesn't really mean to be grumpy," Aster offered as explanation, but Arapaima was shaking his head before they could even finish.
"No, he… he's more of a morning person, but that… Even if it was just that, he would have said something. I don't…" his hands trailed off and he curled his arms around his knees, frowning at the ground and trying to think.
"And this change in attitude is coming out of nowhere?" Kali asked and Arapaima looked up at her as she leaned forward on one of the furnaces not currently lit, curling her arms over it. "Hard to think he'd suddenly act upset over nothing and not tell you. Obviously you know him better, but I never got petty energy from Alex. Haley maybe, but not him."
Arapaima's instinct was to say yes, this was coming out of nowhere, but he paused just before signing, dropping his hands and sitting up straighter as he thought. Had this come out of nowhere, or had he been missing something?
He looked back on their recent conversations — fewer than they were before they'd started visiting Ginger Island, and the four of them had needed to pick up various grinds to fix up that second farm and abandoned resort. Not to mention Mr. Qi giving them even more tasks, along with the sudden uptick in what some of the other townsfolk were asking for, or the new special orders being posted on the board. It wasn't strange now for Arapaima to come home once Alex was already in bed, and they'd have a quiet greeting and wake up together before Arapaima's day started all over.
Alex had mentioned recently on a rainy day that he'd spent his time carrying around the gridball, that "a guy can pretend." The sheepish laugh he had said it with had made Arapaima falter even then, but before he could really dwell on it and ask what Alex meant, Alex was already changing the subject and pulling Arapaima into bed.
His chest felt tight as he realized just how little time he had been spending with Alex lately and — more important to him — how often in that time, Alex was clearly unhappy with something but was doing his best to hide it, switching the subject quickly or insisting that he was fine when Arapaima did catch on.
"I…" he blinked, focusing on his friends again. Even Sour Patch was looking more concerned, standing straighter and its arms dropping, while Aster rested a hand on his shoulder and squeezed, and Kali tilted her head, an understanding dawning on her face.
"I say we call it quits today," she said, looking over to Sour Patch. "We made some progress and we still have four more days."
It looked conflicted, and Aster piped up. "I can stay if you guys want to keep going, should be fine with just us three."
"You guys are sure?"
Sour Patch was still frowning, glancing longingly at the ladder before sighing heavily and its face softening when it looked back to Arapaima. "Yeah, whatever's up with Alex and whatever you just realized, that's more important than this. Besides, I think you're just gonna be an even worse shot now until you can deal with everything." It tilted its head. "Would you be up for another mining trip Saturday?"
"… tentative yes," Arapaima signed, pushing himself up to his feet. He passed Kali the slingshot and Sour Patch the dagger, hauling his usual bag onto his shoulder. "Really okay I head out early?"
"We'll catch back up with you tomorrow morning," Kali said with a smile, hooking the belt of ammo around her waist.
"Maybe stop by Harvey's on your way," Aster piped up, also getting to their feet. "You did get a little banged up."
Arapaima knew they were right — he could feel his body aching, bruises already forming and cuts and bites from rock crabs and duggies littering his legs where they tore through his jeans. Much as he should probably visit Harvey, already he was planning on cutting through the mountain and patching himself up at home. He could stop by Harvey's tomorrow morning to make sure nothing was infected, he just—
"Maybe, see you guys later," he waved before turning out of the mines, breaking into a jog with energy he didn't think he'd have after a dip into the caverns.
-
Arapaima was bemoaning the lack of totems as soon as the farm came into sight, it felt like it took ages for the silos and fields almost ready for harvest to come into sight, and he slowed his pace if only so he wasn't completely dead to the world soon as he sat down anywhere with how his body was truly starting to feel the pain that came with multiple fucked explosions and taking hits from monsters.
He was greeted by Charlie and Jack first — the dogs perking up from the shade of the peach trees near a pond, where they loved watching Aster's ducks swim — and stumbled to catch them when they jumped, chuckling. He scratched their necks and ears a few times before easing them off. "Sorry boys, I'm busy right now," he signed, even if he knew they wouldn't understand fully. They did understand 'sorry' and took Arapaima trying to return home in stride, Jack giving one last lick to Arapaima's palm before his ears perked up and he was off, Charlie chasing after him.
Arapaima trekked across the cobblestone path to the center of the farm, rounding to where his house was pressed against the cliffside. He dropped his bag at the steps and looked around, not seeing Alex quite yet and wondering if he was inside.
Before he could take that first step up he heard a grunt from around the side of the house, a familiar sound that was followed by barely-audible and strained counts. Arapaima swerved around to the side of the house, where Alex had set up a workout area when he first moved in, and smiled slightly when he saw Alex, his eyes closed as he focused on his workout.
He watched Alex awhile, both because he didn't want to disturb his workout and because his husband just looked good, and Arapaima was not above checking him out and appreciating how his muscles bulged and shined with sweat. He looked enticing — and Arapaima had to shake any of those thoughts away, because now was time for a serious discussion, not sex.
Alex's counting eventually came to a stop and he set down the weights with a sigh, settling back onto the bench and rolling his shoulders. He didn't notice Arapaima at first as he grabbed his water, taking steady sips as he finally looked up and his eyes swept over the farm, passing by Arapaima at first before widening. Alex choked as his gaze returned to Arapaima and Arapaima panicked, rushing over as he hacked up water.
"Paima—! What— What are you—ack, fuck— doing here?" Alex coughed out, wiping at his mouth as Arapaima rubbed his back, slowly sitting up and taking deep breaths. Arapaima looked over him once more, no longer in appreciation but concern, making sure he wasn't gonna choke again. "Thought you were—" and now Alex bolted upright, twisting to get a better look at Arapaima. "What in the name of Yoba happened to you?!" he asked, getting to his feet and pulling Arapaima right along with him. "I— You— you should go see Harvey—"
"I'm fine," Arapaima signed as Alex began pulling him away from his workout station. "We have stuff here, I can patch up inside, I'll explain later. But— Alex, Alex look at me—" but Alex was still focusing on his injuries, which yeah, Arapaima knew they didn't look great, but they weren't that bad (that, or he was getting too used to getting hurt spelunking with the others, and he decided he could deal with that possibility and the anxiety that was undoubtedly gonna spark later), and Arapaima needed him to process what he was actually saying.
He twisted his arm that Alex was holding and tapped thrice at Alex's forearm, digging his heels in until Alex inhaled sharply and looked up, finally meeting his eyes. "I'll explain, promise. But I think we need to talk."
Alex hesitated. "Talk…? There's—" he cut himself off with a half-hearted laugh. "There's nothing we need to talk about."
Arapaima shook his head. "Yes, and I think you're trying to avoid it." Arapaima glanced away, biting his lip before sighing. When he looked back at Alex, he managed to tug his arm free and loop both around Alex's neck, pulling the man close and pressing their foreheads together. He heard Alex gasp slightly and he leaned in to press a gentle kiss to Alex's lips, pulling back before it could really go anywhere. "Please, Alex?" he signed with one hand, bringing the other from around Alex's head to the front so he could cup Alex's cheek. "Please, can we talk?"
Alex swallowed, glancing between Arapaima's hand and his face before he deflated, his own arms wrapping around Arapaima. He nodded as he tucked his head into Arapaima's shoulder. "Fine, yeah… we can talk. But after we get you patched up."
"During," Arapaima nudged Alex away to sign, and Alex was about to protest, but— "Please, I don't— I don't want us to lose the subject this time."
Alex's lips thinned before he sighed, nodding once before using his arm around Arapaima's waist to steer them back to the house.
-
"So, what's so important you just have to talk about it before we patch you up?" Alex asked as he collected the first aid kit from under the sink, turning to Arapaima as he stripped off his pants and shirt so they could better clean and bandage the injuries. He frowned at Alex as he stepped into the bathtub.
"The first— that. I've started to notice, you sound… sometimes, it sounds bitter. Sometimes sad. Sometimes disappointed, or annoyed. And I want to know why. I have a guess, but I don't like assuming."
Alex blinked at him, hesitating before settling on the floor just outside the tub and beginning to run the water. "I'm not upset," he said almost automatically, before cringing at the look Arapaima gave him. "I— fine, yeah, I'm upset sometimes. But it's stupid, I— I shouldn't be taking it out on you."
"It can't be stupid if it's bothering you this much," Arapaima signed, reaching to tilt Alex's face his way. "What's wrong?"
Alex pulled Arapaima's hand away, taking a washcloth from their little stack and wetting it to begin wiping away the blood on Arapaima's arms and legs. Arapaima frowned but didn't try signing anything until Alex decided he was ready to answer. Alex focused on cleaning away the grime that always stuck after visiting the mines as he considered how to voice his thoughts.
"I do think it's stupid," he finally settled on, saying it quietly. "I just— I know you're busy, I knew you'd be even when we were married, I got a taste of it living here while we were still dating. But I… I don't know, it— recently, it's been harder to deal with. We used to spend a lot of time together, even when you got busy. And now…" He glanced up just once from his work, looking up at Arapaima through his bangs, and normally the look would make Arapaima melt, but all it did right now was make his heart squeeze. "And now I barely see you."
He took a shuddering breath, sitting up to turn off the water and discard the wet cloth to instead grab a dry one, dabbing off any excess water before he could apply disinfectant and salves. "I don't— I like living on the farm, and helping out around here. I do. But… it's not what I envisioned for myself, and it's not quite as fulfilling as before— as I expected it to be when I said yes."
His words hung in the air and Arapaima let them soak in, not wanting to get defensive — which was his first instinct, but that wouldn't be fair to Alex. Alex took in another deep breath, dipping fingers into one of the many salves each farmer kept on hand and began to spread it across Arapaima's skin, relief oozing into his agitated and scraped skin. Arapaima didn't feel it much, still considering Alex's words, both more painful than the wounds and ringing with a vulnerability that Arapaima didn't want to crush.
"You wanted to go pro," Arapaima signed eventually, deciding that was a good place to start.
"I mean, yeah…"
"Why did you stop trying?" he asked, tilting his head. "I— we," Arapaima amended, because Alex helped not just him but the others, too. "We all appreciate your help, but I didn't… I don't know why you stopped trying to achieve your dreams."
Alex looked down with a frown. "… I don't know." He put the medicine away and grabbed the bandages, hauling himself up to the edge of the tub and pulling Arapaima up to sit next to him. "I guess I figured it wasn't as realistic, and it's not— I don't regret marrying you, please don't think that," Alex rushed to say, setting the bandages on his lap to cup Arapaima's face in his hands. Arapaima wasn't sure what his face looked like, but that Alex caught on— his heart was still aching with every word and the thought had crossed Arapaima's mind. "I don't regret it," he repeated, quieter, leaning closer.
"Going pro… I… I'd love to do it, but— it— I'd feel awful, knowing that instead I could be here helping you and the others with the farm. And I— when we were dating, I realized I didn't mind settling down on the farm, doing this kind of work is harder than I expected some days but it's rewarding in its own ways. And, doing this, I— we can still see each other. If I try going pro now, we'd really have no time together at all."
Alex's hands lingered on Arapaima's cheeks a second more before he dropped them with a sigh, picking the bandages back up and starting on Arapaima's arm. Once again Arapaima absorbed his words, watching as Alex wrapped his arm before shifting back so he could begin on his legs. Alex worked in silence and Arapaima wanted to wait until they were finished, so he could sign without Alex needing to divide his focus further. It gave him time to also figure out how he wanted to continue.
He sighed heavily as he finished wrapping the last of Arapaima's injuries, putting the remaining bandages away and getting to his feet. Arapaima followed suite, but before Alex could go far he spun Alex around, backing him into the bathroom counter, drawing his attention away from the first aid kit. He nudged Alex to sit on top of the counter, tapping at his thighs before resting his hands on the counter and looking down at Alex expectantly. Alex hesitated before complying, lifting himself up.
"I'm sorry, Alex," Arapaima began, settling between Alex's thighs. "I— You saying you knew I'd be busy… I… this isn't the life I promised you, and it's not your fault it doesn't reach your expectations. It's mine. We— We've been focusing a lot, on different projects, way more than we have before. A lot of the farm has been automated, with sprinklers and feeders, so we have more time for other things and have taken on a lot." He paused in his signing to cup Alex's cheek in one hand, caressing underneath Alex's eye gently, feeling the roughness of his callouses catch on smooth skin, but Alex was leaning into the touch and tilting his face to press his lips to Arapaima's palm, eyes not leaving Arapaima's.
"What I should have done, was use more of that time to spend with you. It's not fair to you."
"That's not—"
"It isn't fair," Arapaima repeated firmly. "You're worried about not being able to spend much time with me if you go pro, but what am I doing with spending all my time doing all these other things?" he asked. Arapaima took a deep breath, feeling it tremble slightly, and realized he himself was shaking a little. He shook his head. "I— we don't need to rush these projects. We shouldn't be rushing them like this."
"…" Alex's hands lifted from the counter to wrap around Arapaima's shoulders, settling in a clasp around Arapaima's neck, fingers tracing gentle, small circles into Arapaima's nape. "I don't understand," he admitted quietly.
"I want to spend more time with you, like I should have already been doing. I should have been making time for you, and I'm sorry I wasn't," Arapaima explained, leaning in to press a kiss to Alex's cheek, then the corner of his mouth, innocent and lingering before he pulled away slightly. "As for you going pro… do you still want to do it?"
Alex blinked down at him, brows furrowing. "I mean, yes…"
Arapaima smiled up at Alex. "Then why don't you try?" he asked. "Putting aside the worry we won't have time together, is there anything else stopping you?"
He watched as the athlete considered his words, worrying at his lip in thought. Then Alex was shaking his head, slowly at first before he paused, then more resolutely shook it. "No, I don't— nothing else would stop me…"
"Will you try? For me?" Arapaima asked, tilting his head and softening his smile. "We can work around our schedules, and— well, Sour Patch takes online classes still, I'm sure if we need, we can do video calls anytime you can't stay at home. I have a more flexible schedule than you do, I can work around your schedule."
"I can't— the others, your guys' routines? The— you guys have been rushing for a reason."
"Can adapt," Arapaima signed while sighing. "And we have, but I can go tell that reason to fuck off." Alex startled at the words, and Arapaima leaned closer to press his face against Alex's chest, deflating under the weight of Alex's arms. He tilted so Alex could continue seeing his signs. "The deadlines don't actually exist, they're just self-imposed timelines one blue asshole has encouraged. The only deadlines are his little tasks, which I am barely interested in. I can pull back a bit, and see about getting the others on board."
"You don't… you don't have to do that for me," Alex mumbled, leaning his head on Arapaima's, searing the words into Arapaima's temple.
"Alex, I want more time with you. I want you to be happy with your life. And… I think it'd be good for everyone." He pressed a small kiss to Alex's jaw.
Alex was quiet for a minute, arms curling tighter around Arapaima and hands shifting to his hair, stroking through the strands slowly. "… Then… Yeah, I want to try going pro. If we can still spend more time together, I'd love to try."
"I promise," Arapaima signed as he pulled away, "I'll make more time for you. And, I'll always be here, cheering you on." He grinned, a mix of cheeky and fond that got a quiet laugh from Alex. "I'm proud of you."
Alex's cheeks dusted red and he ducked his head before reeling Arapaima in for a proper hug, wrapping his legs around Arapaima along with his arms, and Arapaima was happy to curl into the embrace, his own arms wrapping around Alex and squeezing him tight. Alex hummed as he buried his face in Arapaima's hair, cuddling closer.
Arapaima closed his eyes, nuzzling into Alex's throat and breathing him in, the familiar scent his heart recognized as purely Alex washing over him. He felt lighter, in a way he hadn't realized he had been missing in days, chest easing as a weight melted away. Arapaima drew back slightly, bringing his hands up to cup Alex's face between them, stroking his cheeks once more, watching Alex's eyes blink open and feeling a warmth envelop him as they settled on him, content and excited and adoring all swirling in those green eyes he loved. Arapaima smiled gently when Alex leaned down to press their foreheads together, watching his eyes flutter shut before slowly opening again, as if he also didn't want to look away — didn't want to break the quiet comfort that was blanketing them.
He drew one hand away to sign, "I love you, Alex."
Alex breathed in shakily, pulling Arapaima closer once again to tuck his head into Alex's shoulder, lips pressing to Arapaima's temple. He felt more than he heard the words Alex mumbled in return. "I love you, Arapaima."
Warnings/Content: Lack of communication, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Non-sexual intimacy, Minor injuries
Summary:
Waking up for yet another busy day, Arapaima gets caught off-guard with Alex seeming annoyed with him, even if he says he's fine. He drops it for the morning but, unable to stop thinking about it, heads back to the farm early in search of his husband to figure out what's wrong.
It helps when you talk about things, they both come to realize.
Arapaima had grown used to rising with the sun — he'd been doing it before even coming to Pelican Town, a habit built with taking up odd jobs around the beach that needed to be found early in the morning, or fishing trips that relied on using every bit of daylight to the fullest. Since coming to the valley, it certainly became harder, with how exhausting farm work was in comparison, but he liked to think he took the change a bit better than the others.
He was still growing used to sharing a bed with someone again, waking up curled around Alex or with Alex wrapped around him, and having to make sure he didn't disturb him too much. It rarely happened, as Alex was also an early riser and sometimes beat even Arapaima out of bed. He was surprised every time, but happy to see Alex up and about anyways, and they'd usually share breakfast before Arapaima had to go deal with his section of the farm and work on some of his and the other farmers' goals for the week. They'd recently discovered what Willy called Ginger Island and how in disrepair some of it was, and that had been eating at all of their time. So every moment with Alex, Arapaima cherished.
Today was one of the days Arapaima woke up with his arms circling a waist, face buried in soft brown hair. Taking a deep breath, Arapaima reveled in the warmth of his husband, not quite wanting to rise just yet. He was half tempted to go back to sleep, or pretend to just so he could stay cuddled against Alex for another hour or two. A crowing from outside, loud and shrill, made him flinch and he stifled a groan into the back of Alex's neck. A glance at the clock on their wall, and Arapaima sighed quietly, blinking the sleep from his eyes. He needed to get up.
He shifted carefully, slowly pulling his arm from under Alex, sitting up reluctantly and scrubbing at his face. He looked down at Alex and smiled slightly, watching as the light of the sunrise slowly filtered in and crept up Alex's face, painting him a golden hue.
Gently, Arapaima leaned down, brushing Alex's bangs away from Alex's face to press a kiss to his forehead.
He must not have been as gentle as he intended, because Alex's face scrunches up and he turns his head into the pillow, a low groan ripping from his throat. "Nnnghh… what is it?" he asks, turning back to look at Arapaima over his shoulder.
Arapaima smiles sheepishly. "Sorry, didn't mean to wake you. Gonna head out now, go back to sleep," he signed, carding a hand gently through Alex's hair.
Alex blinks at him before sighing heavily, eyes closing tight and turning back into the pillow. "Mmmmf… fine, see you…"
The tone is one Arapaima hasn't heard before — and he frowns, brow creasing as he stares down at Alex. Alex sounded almost… petulant. He wracks his brain, trying to figure out why Alex may sound like that but drawing up blank. Arapaima worries at his lip, staring at the back of Alex's head before slipping off the bed and rounding to Alex's side, wide awake himself now and crouching to get a better look at his husband.
He taps Alex's shoulder lightly, three times, and he watches Alex's face twist into one of mild annoyance — and okay, Arapaima did feel bad about not letting him sleep more but he would be thinking about the tone all day — before opening his eyes again.
"Yeah?"
"Something up?" Arapaima signed, eyes locked with Alex's, concern meeting a tired frustration.
Alex swallowed slightly and his eyes flicked away. When he returned them to Arapaima, the frustration had disappeared and he feigned a smile — Arapaima's concern only grew, seeing how the smile didn't reach Alex's eyes. "'m fine," he said quietly, the smile dropping as he seemed to realize Arapaima wasn't buying it. "Just… go get your breakfast and get to your work, I know you're busy today. I'll see you tonight."
"Are you sure? I can stay home, we can—"
"Just go, Paima. Promise, I am fine," Alex huffed, offering a more convincing smile and reaching out to pull Arapaima close, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. Arapaima let him, closing his eyes and melting into the kiss, and when Alex let him go he watched as Alex resettled into the pillows to supposedly go back to sleep.
Arapaima lingered anyway, but Alex didn't stir or say anything else, and reluctantly Arapaima got to his feet to get ready for the day. It felt more like going through the motions, and he grabbed a pack of field snacks and goat cheese instead of breakfast, too distracted for an appetite. He glanced in on Alex one last time, but Alex was still curled up in bed and breathing evenly, so Arapaima finally left to go meet the others.
-
They were skipping the island today, but Kali and Sour Patch had begged Aster and him to join them in the mines because they'd had the bright idea of accepting a challenge from Mr. Qi in that weird room the guy had on the island, and it had messed with the mines. Arapaima had wanted nothing to do with it, but when Kali and Sour Patch were both certain they'd need the help, he knew it was bad. They worked through their most pressing chores of the day before setting out to make the most of their time in the mines. Arriving revealed a blue hue to the caverns, and Aster borrowed a shield and rapier from Kali while Sour Patch gave Arapaima a slingshot armed with explosive ammo and a dagger just in case anything did get too close. And down into the depths they went — the elevator out of commission once again as they slowly worked their way down.
Arapaima was struggling to focus, even as he tried to keep the thought of Alex's words and tone this morning from his mind. He'd taken hits he usually wouldn't and not just because of whatever Mr. Qi had done to these creatures that made them stupidly strong and fast. It was enough for the others to notice, his work even sloppier than it usually was.
He flinched as he blasted a slime back a little too close to where Kali stood, and she jumped back to avoid the explosive, stumbling over a rock and just barely catching herself on the wall. Aster cursed under their breath just as the explosive truly went off, bracing their shield in front of Kali and themself.
"Think we can take a break," Sour Patch called, wiping sweat from its brow but only succeeding in smearing blue slime across its forehead. "You definitely need one," it said pointedly, head tilting to Arapaima. He rubbed his face before dragging his hand to the back of his neck, sighing heavily and nodding.
The climb back up was swift as they dodged whatever creatures they had missed on their first go-around, just aiming to get lower and collect resources. Breaching the surface once more was a relief, and Arapaima collapsed against one of the chests, sinking to the ground and hanging his head. He listened as the others climbed up, the silence palpable and he could feel the weight of their eyes on him.
Eventually, he heard Aster sigh heavily and plop down next to him. "Aight, spill, what's going on?"
Arapaima looked up, resting his head on his knees for a moment as he glanced to Aster, then the other two. Sour Patch was leaning against a furnace as Kali began loading it, arms crossed and looking at him expectantly.
"You're not usually this distracted, even in the mines," Kali added as she stood back up, dusting the coal off her hands. "Like, I know you usually hate it, but damn was that rough." Aster shot her a glare.
"Kali…" they huffed.
"No, no, she's right," he signed, stopping Aster from telling Kali off — he was well-used to now how blunt she could be, appreciated it most of the time. "I was screwing up a lot. Sorry. I just… this morning was weird, and I can't stop thinking about Alex."
Sour Patch's face scrunched up slightly — not quite in annoyance, but something more like confusion and reflexive disgust (which he was used to seeing on its face anytime he or Aster talked about their partners, and knew it wasn't personal). "Okay, I know when you guys first started… dating… and then got married, you were more distracted and, I dunno, that's understandable because you were in that honeymoon phase, but what's got you so messed up now?" Sour Patch asked.
Arapaima threw his hands up, frustration finally breaking across his face. "I don't even know! He just seemed… really annoyed this morning? He said he was fine but he didn't sound fine."
"I mean, you do get up early. Could be he didn't wanna get up just yet? I know Elliott can get pretty grumpy if I wake him up early on accident, and he doesn't really mean to be grumpy," Aster offered as explanation, but Arapaima was shaking his head before they could even finish.
"No, he… he's more of a morning person, but that… Even if it was just that, he would have said something. I don't…" his hands trailed off and he curled his arms around his knees, frowning at the ground and trying to think.
"And this change in attitude is coming out of nowhere?" Kali asked and Arapaima looked up at her as she leaned forward on one of the furnaces not currently lit, curling her arms over it. "Hard to think he'd suddenly act upset over nothing and not tell you. Obviously you know him better, but I never got petty energy from Alex. Haley maybe, but not him."
Arapaima's instinct was to say yes, this was coming out of nowhere, but he paused just before signing, dropping his hands and sitting up straighter as he thought. Had this come out of nowhere, or had he been missing something?
He looked back on their recent conversations — fewer than they were before they'd started visiting Ginger Island, and the four of them had needed to pick up various grinds to fix up that second farm and abandoned resort. Not to mention Mr. Qi giving them even more tasks, along with the sudden uptick in what some of the other townsfolk were asking for, or the new special orders being posted on the board. It wasn't strange now for Arapaima to come home once Alex was already in bed, and they'd have a quiet greeting and wake up together before Arapaima's day started all over.
Alex had mentioned recently on a rainy day that he'd spent his time carrying around the gridball, that "a guy can pretend." The sheepish laugh he had said it with had made Arapaima falter even then, but before he could really dwell on it and ask what Alex meant, Alex was already changing the subject and pulling Arapaima into bed.
His chest felt tight as he realized just how little time he had been spending with Alex lately and — more important to him — how often in that time, Alex was clearly unhappy with something but was doing his best to hide it, switching the subject quickly or insisting that he was fine when Arapaima did catch on.
"I…" he blinked, focusing on his friends again. Even Sour Patch was looking more concerned, standing straighter and its arms dropping, while Aster rested a hand on his shoulder and squeezed, and Kali tilted her head, an understanding dawning on her face.
"I say we call it quits today," she said, looking over to Sour Patch. "We made some progress and we still have four more days."
It looked conflicted, and Aster piped up. "I can stay if you guys want to keep going, should be fine with just us three."
"You guys are sure?"
Sour Patch was still frowning, glancing longingly at the ladder before sighing heavily and its face softening when it looked back to Arapaima. "Yeah, whatever's up with Alex and whatever you just realized, that's more important than this. Besides, I think you're just gonna be an even worse shot now until you can deal with everything." It tilted its head. "Would you be up for another mining trip Saturday?"
"… tentative yes," Arapaima signed, pushing himself up to his feet. He passed Kali the slingshot and Sour Patch the dagger, hauling his usual bag onto his shoulder. "Really okay I head out early?"
"We'll catch back up with you tomorrow morning," Kali said with a smile, hooking the belt of ammo around her waist.
"Maybe stop by Harvey's on your way," Aster piped up, also getting to their feet. "You did get a little banged up."
Arapaima knew they were right — he could feel his body aching, bruises already forming and cuts and bites from rock crabs and duggies littering his legs where they tore through his jeans. Much as he should probably visit Harvey, already he was planning on cutting through the mountain and patching himself up at home. He could stop by Harvey's tomorrow morning to make sure nothing was infected, he just—
"Maybe, see you guys later," he waved before turning out of the mines, breaking into a jog with energy he didn't think he'd have after a dip into the caverns.
-
Arapaima was bemoaning the lack of totems as soon as the farm came into sight, it felt like it took ages for the silos and fields almost ready for harvest to come into sight, and he slowed his pace if only so he wasn't completely dead to the world soon as he sat down anywhere with how his body was truly starting to feel the pain that came with multiple fucked explosions and taking hits from monsters.
He was greeted by Charlie and Jack first — the dogs perking up from the shade of the peach trees near a pond, where they loved watching Aster's ducks swim — and stumbled to catch them when they jumped, chuckling. He scratched their necks and ears a few times before easing them off. "Sorry boys, I'm busy right now," he signed, even if he knew they wouldn't understand fully. They did understand 'sorry' and took Arapaima trying to return home in stride, Jack giving one last lick to Arapaima's palm before his ears perked up and he was off, Charlie chasing after him.
Arapaima trekked across the cobblestone path to the center of the farm, rounding to where his house was pressed against the cliffside. He dropped his bag at the steps and looked around, not seeing Alex quite yet and wondering if he was inside.
Before he could take that first step up he heard a grunt from around the side of the house, a familiar sound that was followed by barely-audible and strained counts. Arapaima swerved around to the side of the house, where Alex had set up a workout area when he first moved in, and smiled slightly when he saw Alex, his eyes closed as he focused on his workout.
He watched Alex awhile, both because he didn't want to disturb his workout and because his husband just looked good, and Arapaima was not above checking him out and appreciating how his muscles bulged and shined with sweat. He looked enticing — and Arapaima had to shake any of those thoughts away, because now was time for a serious discussion, not sex.
Alex's counting eventually came to a stop and he set down the weights with a sigh, settling back onto the bench and rolling his shoulders. He didn't notice Arapaima at first as he grabbed his water, taking steady sips as he finally looked up and his eyes swept over the farm, passing by Arapaima at first before widening. Alex choked as his gaze returned to Arapaima and Arapaima panicked, rushing over as he hacked up water.
"Paima—! What— What are you—ack, fuck— doing here?" Alex coughed out, wiping at his mouth as Arapaima rubbed his back, slowly sitting up and taking deep breaths. Arapaima looked over him once more, no longer in appreciation but concern, making sure he wasn't gonna choke again. "Thought you were—" and now Alex bolted upright, twisting to get a better look at Arapaima. "What in the name of Yoba happened to you?!" he asked, getting to his feet and pulling Arapaima right along with him. "I— You— you should go see Harvey—"
"I'm fine," Arapaima signed as Alex began pulling him away from his workout station. "We have stuff here, I can patch up inside, I'll explain later. But— Alex, Alex look at me—" but Alex was still focusing on his injuries, which yeah, Arapaima knew they didn't look great, but they weren't that bad (that, or he was getting too used to getting hurt spelunking with the others, and he decided he could deal with that possibility and the anxiety that was undoubtedly gonna spark later), and Arapaima needed him to process what he was actually saying.
He twisted his arm that Alex was holding and tapped thrice at Alex's forearm, digging his heels in until Alex inhaled sharply and looked up, finally meeting his eyes. "I'll explain, promise. But I think we need to talk."
Alex hesitated. "Talk…? There's—" he cut himself off with a half-hearted laugh. "There's nothing we need to talk about."
Arapaima shook his head. "Yes, and I think you're trying to avoid it." Arapaima glanced away, biting his lip before sighing. When he looked back at Alex, he managed to tug his arm free and loop both around Alex's neck, pulling the man close and pressing their foreheads together. He heard Alex gasp slightly and he leaned in to press a gentle kiss to Alex's lips, pulling back before it could really go anywhere. "Please, Alex?" he signed with one hand, bringing the other from around Alex's head to the front so he could cup Alex's cheek. "Please, can we talk?"
Alex swallowed, glancing between Arapaima's hand and his face before he deflated, his own arms wrapping around Arapaima. He nodded as he tucked his head into Arapaima's shoulder. "Fine, yeah… we can talk. But after we get you patched up."
"During," Arapaima nudged Alex away to sign, and Alex was about to protest, but— "Please, I don't— I don't want us to lose the subject this time."
Alex's lips thinned before he sighed, nodding once before using his arm around Arapaima's waist to steer them back to the house.
-
"So, what's so important you just have to talk about it before we patch you up?" Alex asked as he collected the first aid kit from under the sink, turning to Arapaima as he stripped off his pants and shirt so they could better clean and bandage the injuries. He frowned at Alex as he stepped into the bathtub.
"The first— that. I've started to notice, you sound… sometimes, it sounds bitter. Sometimes sad. Sometimes disappointed, or annoyed. And I want to know why. I have a guess, but I don't like assuming."
Alex blinked at him, hesitating before settling on the floor just outside the tub and beginning to run the water. "I'm not upset," he said almost automatically, before cringing at the look Arapaima gave him. "I— fine, yeah, I'm upset sometimes. But it's stupid, I— I shouldn't be taking it out on you."
"It can't be stupid if it's bothering you this much," Arapaima signed, reaching to tilt Alex's face his way. "What's wrong?"
Alex pulled Arapaima's hand away, taking a washcloth from their little stack and wetting it to begin wiping away the blood on Arapaima's arms and legs. Arapaima frowned but didn't try signing anything until Alex decided he was ready to answer. Alex focused on cleaning away the grime that always stuck after visiting the mines as he considered how to voice his thoughts.
"I do think it's stupid," he finally settled on, saying it quietly. "I just— I know you're busy, I knew you'd be even when we were married, I got a taste of it living here while we were still dating. But I… I don't know, it— recently, it's been harder to deal with. We used to spend a lot of time together, even when you got busy. And now…" He glanced up just once from his work, looking up at Arapaima through his bangs, and normally the look would make Arapaima melt, but all it did right now was make his heart squeeze. "And now I barely see you."
He took a shuddering breath, sitting up to turn off the water and discard the wet cloth to instead grab a dry one, dabbing off any excess water before he could apply disinfectant and salves. "I don't— I like living on the farm, and helping out around here. I do. But… it's not what I envisioned for myself, and it's not quite as fulfilling as before— as I expected it to be when I said yes."
His words hung in the air and Arapaima let them soak in, not wanting to get defensive — which was his first instinct, but that wouldn't be fair to Alex. Alex took in another deep breath, dipping fingers into one of the many salves each farmer kept on hand and began to spread it across Arapaima's skin, relief oozing into his agitated and scraped skin. Arapaima didn't feel it much, still considering Alex's words, both more painful than the wounds and ringing with a vulnerability that Arapaima didn't want to crush.
"You wanted to go pro," Arapaima signed eventually, deciding that was a good place to start.
"I mean, yeah…"
"Why did you stop trying?" he asked, tilting his head. "I— we," Arapaima amended, because Alex helped not just him but the others, too. "We all appreciate your help, but I didn't… I don't know why you stopped trying to achieve your dreams."
Alex looked down with a frown. "… I don't know." He put the medicine away and grabbed the bandages, hauling himself up to the edge of the tub and pulling Arapaima up to sit next to him. "I guess I figured it wasn't as realistic, and it's not— I don't regret marrying you, please don't think that," Alex rushed to say, setting the bandages on his lap to cup Arapaima's face in his hands. Arapaima wasn't sure what his face looked like, but that Alex caught on— his heart was still aching with every word and the thought had crossed Arapaima's mind. "I don't regret it," he repeated, quieter, leaning closer.
"Going pro… I… I'd love to do it, but— it— I'd feel awful, knowing that instead I could be here helping you and the others with the farm. And I— when we were dating, I realized I didn't mind settling down on the farm, doing this kind of work is harder than I expected some days but it's rewarding in its own ways. And, doing this, I— we can still see each other. If I try going pro now, we'd really have no time together at all."
Alex's hands lingered on Arapaima's cheeks a second more before he dropped them with a sigh, picking the bandages back up and starting on Arapaima's arm. Once again Arapaima absorbed his words, watching as Alex wrapped his arm before shifting back so he could begin on his legs. Alex worked in silence and Arapaima wanted to wait until they were finished, so he could sign without Alex needing to divide his focus further. It gave him time to also figure out how he wanted to continue.
He sighed heavily as he finished wrapping the last of Arapaima's injuries, putting the remaining bandages away and getting to his feet. Arapaima followed suite, but before Alex could go far he spun Alex around, backing him into the bathroom counter, drawing his attention away from the first aid kit. He nudged Alex to sit on top of the counter, tapping at his thighs before resting his hands on the counter and looking down at Alex expectantly. Alex hesitated before complying, lifting himself up.
"I'm sorry, Alex," Arapaima began, settling between Alex's thighs. "I— You saying you knew I'd be busy… I… this isn't the life I promised you, and it's not your fault it doesn't reach your expectations. It's mine. We— We've been focusing a lot, on different projects, way more than we have before. A lot of the farm has been automated, with sprinklers and feeders, so we have more time for other things and have taken on a lot." He paused in his signing to cup Alex's cheek in one hand, caressing underneath Alex's eye gently, feeling the roughness of his callouses catch on smooth skin, but Alex was leaning into the touch and tilting his face to press his lips to Arapaima's palm, eyes not leaving Arapaima's.
"What I should have done, was use more of that time to spend with you. It's not fair to you."
"That's not—"
"It isn't fair," Arapaima repeated firmly. "You're worried about not being able to spend much time with me if you go pro, but what am I doing with spending all my time doing all these other things?" he asked. Arapaima took a deep breath, feeling it tremble slightly, and realized he himself was shaking a little. He shook his head. "I— we don't need to rush these projects. We shouldn't be rushing them like this."
"…" Alex's hands lifted from the counter to wrap around Arapaima's shoulders, settling in a clasp around Arapaima's neck, fingers tracing gentle, small circles into Arapaima's nape. "I don't understand," he admitted quietly.
"I want to spend more time with you, like I should have already been doing. I should have been making time for you, and I'm sorry I wasn't," Arapaima explained, leaning in to press a kiss to Alex's cheek, then the corner of his mouth, innocent and lingering before he pulled away slightly. "As for you going pro… do you still want to do it?"
Alex blinked down at him, brows furrowing. "I mean, yes…"
Arapaima smiled up at Alex. "Then why don't you try?" he asked. "Putting aside the worry we won't have time together, is there anything else stopping you?"
He watched as the athlete considered his words, worrying at his lip in thought. Then Alex was shaking his head, slowly at first before he paused, then more resolutely shook it. "No, I don't— nothing else would stop me…"
"Will you try? For me?" Arapaima asked, tilting his head and softening his smile. "We can work around our schedules, and— well, Sour Patch takes online classes still, I'm sure if we need, we can do video calls anytime you can't stay at home. I have a more flexible schedule than you do, I can work around your schedule."
"I can't— the others, your guys' routines? The— you guys have been rushing for a reason."
"Can adapt," Arapaima signed while sighing. "And we have, but I can go tell that reason to fuck off." Alex startled at the words, and Arapaima leaned closer to press his face against Alex's chest, deflating under the weight of Alex's arms. He tilted so Alex could continue seeing his signs. "The deadlines don't actually exist, they're just self-imposed timelines one blue asshole has encouraged. The only deadlines are his little tasks, which I am barely interested in. I can pull back a bit, and see about getting the others on board."
"You don't… you don't have to do that for me," Alex mumbled, leaning his head on Arapaima's, searing the words into Arapaima's temple.
"Alex, I want more time with you. I want you to be happy with your life. And… I think it'd be good for everyone." He pressed a small kiss to Alex's jaw.
Alex was quiet for a minute, arms curling tighter around Arapaima and hands shifting to his hair, stroking through the strands slowly. "… Then… Yeah, I want to try going pro. If we can still spend more time together, I'd love to try."
"I promise," Arapaima signed as he pulled away, "I'll make more time for you. And, I'll always be here, cheering you on." He grinned, a mix of cheeky and fond that got a quiet laugh from Alex. "I'm proud of you."
Alex's cheeks dusted red and he ducked his head before reeling Arapaima in for a proper hug, wrapping his legs around Arapaima along with his arms, and Arapaima was happy to curl into the embrace, his own arms wrapping around Alex and squeezing him tight. Alex hummed as he buried his face in Arapaima's hair, cuddling closer.
Arapaima closed his eyes, nuzzling into Alex's throat and breathing him in, the familiar scent his heart recognized as purely Alex washing over him. He felt lighter, in a way he hadn't realized he had been missing in days, chest easing as a weight melted away. Arapaima drew back slightly, bringing his hands up to cup Alex's face between them, stroking his cheeks once more, watching Alex's eyes blink open and feeling a warmth envelop him as they settled on him, content and excited and adoring all swirling in those green eyes he loved. Arapaima smiled gently when Alex leaned down to press their foreheads together, watching his eyes flutter shut before slowly opening again, as if he also didn't want to look away — didn't want to break the quiet comfort that was blanketing them.
He drew one hand away to sign, "I love you, Alex."
Alex breathed in shakily, pulling Arapaima closer once again to tuck his head into Alex's shoulder, lips pressing to Arapaima's temple. He felt more than he heard the words Alex mumbled in return. "I love you, Arapaima."
Warnings/Content: Canonical/Past Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse
Summary:
A good luck day is turning out like shit for Arapaima, and just as he hopes to get his day back on track with fishing at the beach, he comes across Alex sitting in the sand.
Arapaima hefted his fishing gear higher on his back, huffing as he jogged to the beach. He'd meant to get there much sooner, the Fortune Teller had predicted good luck that day and everyone was splitting up to tackle all the tasks their myriad of terrible luck days had forced them to put off. But then some of the animals had given birth overnight, and there'd been an issue with their sprinklers, and now he was late getting to the beach where he'd meant to meet Willy this morning to haggle for some new bobbers from him before he opened shop.
Packed dirt softened under his feet and Arapaima slowed to a walk, closing his eyes and taking in a deep breath of the salty air, his shoulders slumping. It'd be fine, he could talk to Willy tonight at the Saloon, and focus on fishing until sunset.
He took another deep breath and opened his eyes, about to take his familiar path to the pier. He swept his gaze over the beach, just in case he could spot some of the worms that liked to poke out and were good indicators of something remiss under the ground.
He froze, though, spotting Alex in the sand near the shore, sitting and staring off into the distance. Arapaima furrowed his brow, glancing around again. Haley was nowhere in sight, and she usually only came to the beach if Alex would be playing with his gridball. He couldn't even see the gridball around, actually, now that he took a closer look. Although it seemed like Alex had something in his hands.
Arapaima glanced back at the docks, a longing to put aside his own thoughts and get lost in the sea, and an urge to not stick his nose in other people's business.
But when he looked back at Alex he saw the guy shudder, even though the breeze wasn't truly cold, and he hunched closer to himself, and something just screamed wrong. In the time Arapaima's known Alex, he's never seen Alex try to make himself look small. Yoba, he'd never even seen Alex take a warm sunny day and decide to not enjoy it to its fullest.
Setting his gear and bag down near where soil turned to pale sand, Arapaima walked as casually as he could over to the sitting athlete, stepping loud so the sand crunched under his boots. He didn't want to spook Alex.
He must've anyways, because when he was close enough he saw Alex flinch and whirl his head around. Alex's eyes widened and he turned away just as quick and wiped at his face but Arapaima's breath caught in his throat in the few seconds he had seen. He swallowed thickly at the sniffle Alex didn't manage to stifle, and Arapaima decided the Fortune Teller that day was officially full of shit.
Willing the reflexive tears away, Arapaima sat down slowly next to Alex. He looked Alex over, and realized in his hands wasn't the gridball but a small red box. If it weren't for the fact that he was looking for any off behavior, Arapaima might have missed the slight shake of his hands. Hesitantly, Arapaima reached out and touched Alex's shoulder to get him to look his way.
Very reluctantly Alex did. "What's wrong?" Arapaima signed. Alex looked down at the box and bit his lip, worrying at it before sighing heavily and tilting his head up to stare at the sky.
"Twelve years ago today… my mom died." Alex's voice shook and Arapaima cringed, grateful Alex couldn't see him, because stars was Yoba really throwing him in the deep end. Alex took a trembling breath. "I still remember her. I remember her really well. She'd make salted radish sandwiches for lunch… and she'd play with me in the backyard, tossing the gridball with me." He swallowed again and looked down at the box, and a humorless laugh escaped his lips. "She took really good care of me… and I was too young to ever tell her 'thanks'. And now she's gone, forever." The word was choked out, and he squeezed his eyes shut tight and tried to breathe, but he couldn't stop the sob that broke free.
Arapaima was moving before he could think, wrapping his arms around Alex's shoulders and drawing him in. To his surprise, Alex willingly went along, letting Arapaima push Alex's head into his own neck. Arapaima swore to never tell him it was so that he didn't have to see Alex cry.
It was like the floodgates opened after that, as Alex let himself be pulled closer, and even reached up to cling to Arapaima's tank top, needing something to try grounding himself even as sobs wracked his body and he couldn't even catch his breath, gasping around the lump in his throat. Arapaima held him tighter, rubbing one hand across his back in an attempt to soothe, but with the instinctive tears welling in his own eyes Arapaima was at a loss on what else to do. He just felt in his heart though, he needed to do something. Anything. And this didn't feel like enough, not nearly as much as Alex deserved and probably needed, and his heart ached with the knowledge that he couldn't help more.
Eventually Alex pulled away slightly, scrubbing at his own eyes with his jacket sleeve. He didn't dislodge Arapaima's arms from around him, even when he shifted back a little more so they were closer to sitting side-by-side. Tears still tracked down his cheeks, but he was no longer sobbing so violently.
"This is the only keepsake I have left of her," Alex explained hoarsely, eyes once again locked on the box. "Her secret music box."
With trembling fingers but familiar motions, Alex wound the music box in his lap, closing his eyes and leaning to rest his head on Arapaima's shoulder.
Soft piano music began to play from the box, and Arapaima closed his own eyes. Alex wasn't shaking anymore, but his breaths still caught in his throat as they listened to the music. The notes brought a warmth over him, a feeling of blankets and gentle, close hugs as a child. He tried to envision it, a woman who looked similar to Alex — because though he never described his father, Arapaima had a feeling Alex looked nothing like him. There was no way a man like that would have ever treated Alex the way he did if he felt they looked too similar, and there was no way Alex would let himself look like his father. But the remorse and the care in his voice, recalling her, Arapaima could easily picture such a woman.
The music faded into the wind, and neither of them moved for a long time, listening instead to the waves lapping gently against the shore, subdued as if the ocean itself knew that right here and now, it was a moment of quiet vulnerability that shouldn't be disturbed.
Arapaima felt Alex tilt his head, and slowly blinked his eyes open to glance down at his shoulder. "What are you thinking about?"
He didn't look at Alex as he tried to come up with what to say. Because how do you convey that you thought he deserved so much better, that you were so sorry he had to go through such tragedy so early in life, that you wished you could take the pain away because seeing him deal with it hurt worse than anything you'd felt before? And how do you convey that all without being weird about it?
"If… If you ever need anything, or if you're ever lonely, I'll always be here," he signed eventually, looking back at Alex.
Alex blinked up at Arapaima, and he frowned and slowly sat up, brows drawn together as he searched Arapaima's eyes, looking for— well, Arapaima wasn't sure what he was looking for, but whatever it was Alex must have found it, because he looked away while his cheeks dusted red. He coughed to clear his throat before glancing back at Arapaima, saying quietly, "Thanks, Paima." And despite the situation, despite the fact that his eyes were red from crying, still glassy with tears yet to fall, and his face was stained with tear tracks, Arapaima was hit with how beautiful Alex looked.
His own eyes widened slightly and he looked away, curb-stomping that line of thinking immediately. But he was looking back at Alex again soon because Alex continued talking, keeping his voice low enough that the wind could easily cover his words. "I… you're a really good friend. Probably my best one," he admitted. "And you're different than a lot of other guys. More sensitive." He smiled slightly, still looking sad but— but there was a brightness there, genuine relief and joy even if it was being overpowered by the tragic memories. "I'm glad."
He leaned into Arapaima again, a bit more hesitantly than when Arapaima had drew him in, and wrapped an arm around Arapaima in a quick hug. He was already pulling away by the time Arapaima had realized what was happening. "Thanks again," Alex said as he carefully stood up, tucking the music box close to his chest while he wiped at his face with his free hand. "We should probably head back to town." He sounded reluctant.
Arapaima got to his feet as well, but shook his head. "I'll be staying here," he signed. "Was going to fish." He pointed to the dock, at the Lonely Stone, before tilting his head. "Do you— Would you want to join me?"
"I don't know how to fish," Alex reminded, and Arapaima shrugged.
"Then you can talk while I fish. Why not tell me more about your mom?"
Alex snorted half-heartedly, but when he looked at Arapaima there was a subtle longing there. "You don't want to hear me break down over her." But as he spoke Arapaima began shaking his head.
"I want to hear your memories of her. I want to hear your love for her… please?"
Still looking unsure, but also like he really didn't want to go back to town, Alex finally nodded. Arapaima grabbed his shoulder and gave it a squeeze, a reassuring smile on his face as he pointed to his stuff then the section of the docks he always fished at. Then he gently nudged Alex in the direction of the pier, signing "I'll be there in a minute."
Alex did cry again, a lot. The music box was played, again and again, as Alex haltingly retold stories from his youth about his mother, solely his mother. And Arapaima listened, losing more fish than he usually would but not caring as he focused on Alex, focused on the picture he painted of the woman who raised him for the youngest years of his life.
Arapaima made a mental note to see if there was a way they could go visit her, wherever she was put to rest. It wouldn't be the thanks Alex wanted to give her, but it'd be a chance anyway.
And he wanted to thank her as well, for bringing Alex into this world.
Recently, we asked our members about the story they'd written that they loved the most...
"So hard to choose! Its like picking a favourite child!"
divenire (E) - a ghostly Sebastian/Female Reader story by @burekforsatoru.
Take it Out On Me (E) by @velvetlilith777, a Sebastian/Female Reader in which Sebastian works through some of his frustrations.
Like Nothing Matters (E), a songfic by @indighost21 capturing Elliott with her OC Indi after the Flower Dance.
In the End, It's Right (E) by @annetastic1981a who had a whopping 125 to pick from at the time of writing this, but went with this cute Sam/Sebastian longfic.
Green is my favourite colour on you (E) by @adequateatbest, her ongoing longfic featuring Harvey and her OC, Marisol.
Path to Mine (G) by @spiritedknight, a retelling of Sebastian's Heart Events with her OC, Collette.
Sweet Fern (E) by @glazedsnail, a smutty one-shot featuring Shane and her OC Fern.
Violet Ends (M) - a Sterling/Gil retelling of the French "Bluebeard" fairytale by @folatefangirl.
Guardheart (Alex x Elliott) (M) by @lily-alphonse - A short, heartbreaking medieval AU where Alex and Elliott fall in love while their kingdom is at war.
"It was my first work in the fandom/the one that started it all"
Fever Dream (T) - a fluffy Sam/Sebastian friends-to-lovers sick fic by @seakins.
Lean In & Let Go (E) - an Alex/Sebastian party hook-up story by @exoticlittlebird.
Choices: Spring (M) - by @caelwynn, the beginning of her story between Sterling and Callie, her OC.
Rose and Sunflower 1: The Music Within (T) - written back in 2016 by @randomsquirrel, this was the start of their longfic series with Elliott and their OC Lysander.
Mines and Monsters (T) by @greatdistractions, which introduces her OC Avril to Abigail.
"Its the one I'm most proud of"
Where the Light Fell (E) by @thelibrarbrian, her work-in-progress Elliott/Female Reader longfic.
like falling asleep (T) - a Sebastian/player love-confession fic with an ambiguous ending by @seleswrites.
read you like a book (E) by @saradika, a Harvey/Female Player smut fic with our beloved doctor firmly in his "dirty talk" era.
Sunnyside (E) - by @f0xofspades, her first longfic and also a work-in-progress with Shane and her OC, June.
Loss for Words (G) by @ambersky0319, an Elliott/Trans Male OC one-shot that they already loved, but received a good comment on that elevated it into one of their favourites (comments save fics!)
I Heard That the Sky is Still Blue (T) by @halixius, an emotional hurt/no comfort whump fic with her OC, Nico, and Sebastian.
Ask Me Anything (E) by @kellycataclysm, a mutual-pining fic between Harvey and her OC Lyra which uses the "just one bed" trope not once, but twice!
My Heart is Yours (M) by @mintypegasus, a Sam/Sebastian hurt/comfort, coming-out story.
Hell Finds You Everywhere (E) - a Mafia-AU featuring Sterling, Shane, and Scarlett, @angel-with-an-assbutt22's dancer OC.
The Voyage of the SS Republica and her Taking by the Dread Pirate Shane Morgan (M), a pirate AU told from the point of view of the ship's doctor, Harvey, by @purpleandgreen13.
The One Who Trails (M) by @sallie-nathalies, a Shane-centric story in which his past catches up with him.
Home to Roost (E) by @usernamemybeloathed, an Alex/Female Player post-canon darkfic which, in her own words, has had her kidney.
As always be sure to check the tags on AO3, reader discretion is advised! If you check out any of the works listed here please be sure to leave a kudos and a comment to show your support 🫶
Special thanks to @lily-alphonse and @saradika for post graphics
8.5k words.... and only about 4.5k is them having sex, the rest is them making out or talking
.....
I'm noticing a pattern with my smut stories 😅
Anyway, forget if I mentioned it before, but I don't intend to post my smut stories here. I link them on my masterpost, and I will accept nsfw requests now, but I also don't trust Tumblr nor my luck to not get flagged or whatever. So, they're only getting posted to Ao3
Here's a link to Alex bottoming for the first time with Farmer Arapaima ^^ I won't usually link them like this but figured it'd be good to do so at least once
Evelyn catches Arapaima and Alex kissing in his room, and things spiraled from there.
Alex curled further into the couch, slumped against the arm and wrapped tightly in one of Arapaima's weighted blankets. The heaviness of it was slightly comforting, but the quiet of the house meant his thoughts were running rampant, and he had no distraction. Dusty whined and nudged Alex's leg again, having jumped the fence of his pen and followed Alex and Arapaima home. When Alex tried getting him to head back, to go home, Arapaima said he could come in. Silently Alex had been grateful, even if Dusty wasn't too much of a comfort right now. Sareng meowed from the back of the couch, peering down at Alex with her bright green eyes, and any other day Alex would have loved that she was choosing to hang around so close to him.
He heaved a sigh and tucked his head against his arm. Arapaima's phone had finally stopped ringing. Alex's had been left on silent, far out of his sight so he didn't have to see his grandparents try calling him.
They'd found out about him and Arapaima dating.
He'd left his door unlocked, which he normally didn't do when Arapaima visited. Mostly because his grandparents had a bad habit of not knocking before coming in unless it was locked, and he'd worried about catching the two of them together, especially when he started to finally feel comfortable giving back the affection Arapaima so easily gave.
They weren't doing anything scandalous, but they were on Alex's bed, book Alex was trying to get through abandoned as Arapaima peppered gentle kisses across his face and neck, leaving Alex a mess of stifled laughs. Arapaima's hand was getting a little adventurous, hitching up Alex's shirt slightly to trail against his abs, but not going much further. Alex had made it clear they wouldn't be doing anything beyond kissing in his house, and Arapaima would never dare try to push against those boundaries. Alex tilted his head and cupped Arapaima's jaw in his hands, so he could hold the man still long enough for a proper kiss, humming quietly as Arapaima pressed impossibly closer and squeezed at his waist.
They hadn't heard the door open, but they did hear his grandmother's surprised and very loud "Oh!"
Alex shoved away from Arapaima, but they were so close together and arms tangled between each other that Arapaima didn't have anywhere to go that didn't drag Alex with him, and then they were scrambling apart as Evelyn stared at them, Alex stammering but not knowing what to say, because what was there to say?
His grandpa had rolled up behind his wife upon hearing the commotion, confused at the flustered look on his wife's face and then taking in the red faces of his grandson and his —what George had thought — grandson's best friend besides Haley. The rumpled state of their clothes, the slightly swollen lips, and inability to make eye contact hadn't helped.
George… hadn't taken it well.
The couch dipped and there was pressure against Alex's foot, a hand squeezing his ankle through the blanket. Alex shifted to look at Arapaima, who was watching him with… Alex wasn't too sure what he could describe it as. It wasn't pity, but that's the first thing he thought of. Whatever it was, it bordered on apologetic and sad and Alex hated to see it but if that's what Arapaima looked like, he'd hate to see how he himself looked.
Arapaima glanced at Sareng, made an aborted attempt to sign to Alex before shaking his head and taking a deep breath, looking to the floor then back to Alex. His hands were shaking slightly when he tried signing again — Alex had never seen Arapaima's hands shake when signing, not until that fight.
"What do you need?" he signed eventually.
"I…" Alex shuddered, his voice sounded so weak and he couldn't stand it. He also had no idea what he needed. What do you do after a fight where your very homophobic grandfather found out you had a boyfriend? And had very clearly been intimate with said boyfriend — that's what his grandpa claimed, anyways.
Hesitantly, Arapaima signed, "Hug?" Alex gave a jerky nod, letting go of a blanket edge so Arapaima could crawl into the blanket with him.
Sareng meowed again, more of a soft mewl as Arapaima wrapped Alex up in his arms. He tilted his head up at his little black cat and beckoned her closer. She climbed from the back of the couch slowly onto Arapaima's shoulders, before moving to Alex's a bit awkwardly. She settled, curling her tail around his neck and flicking it at his face, earning a hollow huff of a laugh. Still, she nuzzled his cheek and began purring. Dusty, having moved so Arapaima could cuddle Alex, now nipped at Alex's dangling hand lightly and butted his head against it, encouraging Alex to pet him.
Alex shuddered again as he lightly scratched at Dusty's head, burying his face into Arapaima's neck. Arapaima squeezed him gently, before dragging his hand slowly up and down Alex's back, slightly digging his fingers in to be sure Alex felt it. Alex melted against him, and tried to let his brain shut off.
He'd have to talk to his grandparents again at some point, but it didn't have to be now.
-
Alex groaned at the sound of voices, muffled but far too loud for how early it was. There was a small weight on his side, and a wet nose pressing into his chin, so he didn't move much at first as he cracked his eyes open. He hissed at the stinging irritation from crying, and carefully brought a hand up to not dislodge Sareng.
A bit more bearable, and Alex looked around, frowning when he didn't see Arapaima. Dusty whined from where he was pressed up against Alex, and Alex wasn't sure when he'd climbed onto the couch with him. Sareng was the one on his side, curled into a ball but watching the door with a decidedly very annoyed expression for what was the sweetest cat Alex had ever met. When he shifted, Sareng glanced at him before making a little huff and settling in deeper atop his blanket, making it clear what she meant: you're not going anywhere.
Following her gaze to the front door, Alex saw it was slightly ajar. Slowly and carefully, even with Sareng's protesting meow as he moved her and Dusty trying in vain to keep him from getting off the couch by curling closer into him, Alex climbed out and around the animals. His body was stiff and he swayed slightly, dehydration hitting him hard, and he steadied himself with a hand on the couch. The voices outside were still droning on, so Alex shuffled to the sink to at least get some water before he joined whoever was outside.
He had an idea, and he didn't really want to go outside, but he couldn't hide forever.
When he got to the door, he was surprised to discover Arapaima was just outside it, blocking the front even if he had left the door ajar. He was standing almost defensively in front of it, arms drawn to his chest as he just stared a little ways down the path that led to the rest of the farm.
Arapaima glanced back when the door creaked as Alex opened it further, and the annoyance on his face dissipated, being replaced by worry. Still, Alex stepped outside before Arapaima could try shuffling him back inside, and turned to look at where the arguing had been.
"Alex!" His grandmother's voice was full of relief, but Alex still cringed slightly, copying Arapaima and crossing his arms. He didn't look directly at his grandmother — even if she hadn't contributed to the fight yesterday, hadn't said anything against him and Arapaima, she also didn't say anything to support them. Instead he focused on the other farmers — Aster was closest, and clearly had been the one who was doing the most talking. They were the only one truly in front of his grandmother. Kali and Sour Patch were further away, but were keeping their eyes on the situation.
Aster took one look at Alex before shifting to block Evelyn's view of him. "There, you've seen him. He's fine, he's safe. You can go home now."
Evelyn sidestepped them. "I would like to hear it from my grandson if he wants me gone." Aster looked like they were going to try again.
"It's fine," Alex said before they could. Aster and Arapaima turned to stare at Alex, who cleared his throat. He and Arapaima caught each other's eye and Arapaima dropped his arms, wrapping one around Alex's shoulders and pulling him into his side while the other signed to Aster to listen. Aster clearly didn't want to, but nodded and slowly walked over to Arapaima's fish ponds, settling at one and very obviously joining the other two in keeping an eye on them all.
When his grandmother started to walk closer, Alex nudged Arapaima back slightly, so they were at the railing. "We'll stay on the porch," he told her, and she nodded as she carefully climbed the steps.
Arapaima didn't say anything, keeping one arm wrapped tightly around Alex's shoulders and the other stayed back to grip the wooden railing. Alex glanced briefly at his boyfriend before looking back to his grandmother. He swallowed thickly. "Why are you here?"
"You weren't picking up my calls, Alex. I wanted to make sure you were okay after yesterday."
Alex couldn't help the huff. "How would I have been okay?"
She faltered slightly, but her expression turned sad and she shook her head. "You're right, I— if it had been me, I wouldn't have been okay either. It… I'm sorry, for what it's worth, that it happened at all. I should have knocked before going into your room."
Alex frowned, leaning further into Arapaima. Arapaima squeezed his shoulder and Alex tried to force himself to relax, even just a little. "That's not—" he huffed and shook his head. "That's not the problem. Or, well— it's not all of it." Alex looked at the ground and hugged himself tighter. "Grandpa, I knew would react poorly. That… I wasn't ready for that confrontation, even if I knew it'd probably come eventually."
"I'll be talking with him," Evelyn cut in. "I tried last night, but his temper was too high and I couldn't get through to him. But I'm sure with time, I can get him to see sense, to apologize."
Alex shook his head. "That's still not the issue, though," he said. "It— last night, you said nothing while we were there."
"What could I have said?" Evelyn questioned, her brows drawing in as she stood a little taller in her own frustration. "You two were arguing I wouldn't have been able to get a word in otherwise!"
"You just said you tried talking with him last night — but you couldn't try at all while we were there? I don't… I never worried about you accepting me— accepting us." Alex glanced up at her. "But I always thought that if it did come down to a confrontation like that, you'd at least try to help me. In the moment."
It was silent for a second as Evelyn processed what he said, and Alex watched the frustration simmer back into sadness and realization. She looked at Arapaima, then back to Alex, and took a slow, deep breath. She hesitated before speaking, clearly choosing her words carefully.
"I… I see. I… didn't even realize, that being quiet then would have been the wrong thing to do. I'm used to being able to put aside arguments for another time, if at all, no matter what they're about." She met Alex's gaze. "I'm sorry, Alex."
Alex swallowed but nodded, tilting his head to rest on Arapaima's. It felt weird, a little, to do this with his grandmother right in front of him. But he was tired, and still stressed, and even with her apology it still stung to think about it all. When he clearly had nothing else to say, Evelyn deflated a little but looked to the path from which she came.
"You'll stay here for the time being?" She asked, turning back to them. For the first time this morning, Arapaima signed to her.
"He's always been welcome here. He can stay as long as he likes."
She watched his hands before nodding slowly, focusing back on Alex. "Would you like me to bring some stuff from your room? Or… George has his doctor's appointment in a couple hours. You can come get anything you'd like then. I, I wish I could say it'd be alright but I don't think it'd be a good idea for him to see you quite yet."
And that hurt a lot more, that his grandpa wouldn't want to see him, even with some hours between the two incidents. Alex swallowed, then realized what she was asking, and his mouth went dry at the realization that he was being sort of kicked out, even if very gently and reluctantly.
Arapaima rubbed down his arm slowly and methodically, drawing Alex's attention. He was tilting his head down at Alex, and with his other hand he signed: "What do you want to do?"
Alex took a deep breath. "I'll swing by later. You can text me when you guys leave."
Evelyn nodded and started towards the porch steps. She looked at Alex one last time for that day. "I'll see you later, Alex?"
Fandom / Genre: Stardew Valley / Fluff & Mild Smut
Pairing: Alex/Male Farmer
Warnings/Content: Very mild smut, Clothed sex, Grinding, First time
Summary:
Arapaima asks Alex if he wants to help move some of his fish from the ponds into aquariums, and even if they weren't dating Alex would have agreed out of sheer boredom. Once it's done though, what was initially going to be some couch cuddling turned into a first for their relationship.
Alex was bored. Which was strange, because it was summer, and normally he loved summer and had plenty to do. From playing gridball on the beach to running the ice-cream stand. But the stand was closed today and while he loved hanging out with Haley, he didn't feel like hearing much gossip today. And while he had sworn her to absolute secrecy, she was taking every opportunity when they were alone to tease him about his feelings for Arapaima. She wasn't mean about it, never, but he could only get embarrassed so much before he felt like he would melt into the floor.
His phone lit up and Alex hummed to himself as he grabbed it, his face splitting into a grin to see Arapaima's name pop up. He immediately checked to see what his boyfriend — and that was still very weird to think about, he had a boyfriend — had sent him.
The beauties are getting moved today! Wanna come help?
And with it was a handful of pictures of all of Arapaima's most prized fish. Alex remembered the fish tanks Arapaima had commissioned from Willy, he must have finally gotten them set up.
Well it's not like Alex had anything else to do, and hanging out with Arapaima was always a good time.
He sent a quick text to let Arapaima know he'd come over now, and quickly threw on a semi-clean tank (he'd learned to never wear a clean shirt if he agreed to help out with any of the fish a few weeks into just being friends with the guy) and his runners, leaving with a quick good-bye to his grandparents. Evelyn pushed a bag of cookies into his hands and George even a note, saying he'd been meaning to "send it to that boy but we don't have the envelopes yet."
Alex took the longer route to the South farm entrance as he jogged to the farm. Turning left at the first opening, he felt his face flush deeply at the first sight of his boyfriend.
Arapaima was shirtless, standing in one of his many fish ponds, leaning down to wrangle the fish inside into a decently large bag. Alex just stared as Arapaima's back flexed and arm muscles twisted as he caught the fish, admiring the strength but also just how good he looked, tattoos shifting with each movement. And the water sliding down his back…
When his brain finally decided to rejoin the game, Arapaima was scooping the bag closed and gingerly climbing out of the pool with it. That's when he caught sight of Alex, and Alex's face flushed for a whole other reason when Arapaima's face split into a wide grin and he waved him over. Smiling just as hard and with his chest fluttering slightly, Alex walked over, glancing at the bag to see which fish was in it.
It was Arapaima's Crimson Fish, who he'd named Summer — Vincent had named her actually, because that's the season she was caught in and it was "a pretty name to fit a pretty fish!"
Soon as he was in reach, Arapaima was winding an arm around Alex's shoulders, pulling him in close and pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. The weight of Arapaima's arm around him was familiar enough — Alex learned early on, and had even been warned by Sour Patch when he and Arapaima had started becoming friends, that Arapaima was a very touchy person even with friends. The kissing Alex was still getting used to, but he was leaning in anyway to press another very quickly to Arapaima's lips too.
"How long have you been out here?" Alex asked, pulling back just enough to see Arapaima sign. Arapaima unwound his arm from Alex and turned to a bucket next to Summer's pool, carefully opening the bag again and letting her go down into the bucket. A lid was very quickly put over it just as some water splashed up when she tried to jump out.
"Around… 6 hours? I'm almost done getting them all into buckets. It's good to see you."
Alex's smile softened slightly before he cleared his throat and looked around. "Alright, what do you want me to do?"
-
Alex had been tasked with bringing the fish inside for now, while Arapaima took out the last few he was moving. Half an hour later they began putting the fish into the tanks, Alex following every careful handling instruction Arapaima gave him. He wasn't handling the three Legendary fish Arapaima had, not even Alex would have trusted himself with that, but the other fish like his octopus Octavia and albacore Alfur. Arapaima also showed him how to handle and pet his stingray Steven.
By then end they toweled off any water and Arapaima had chucked on a very loose tank top, and they collapsed onto the couch Arapaima had put in the aquarium room. Arapaima was grinning ear to ear, looking at all his fish swimming in the large tanks. Alex was already looking at him when Arapaima glanced his way.
"Thanks for coming to help," he signed. Alex shook his head.
"Thanks for asking me to help, I had a lot of fun. And any near-drowning by your fish—" because Octavia had attempted it when Alex was putting her in her tank, "—was worth it to see you smiling like this." As he spoke Alex reached over to cup Arapaima's jaw, pressing his thumb slightly into the corner of Arapaima's lips.
Alex could feel his own face heat while he spoke, he was used to being confident but saying these things to a guy still left him feeling unsure even if it felt right, but he got to see the rare instance of Arapaima's cheeks tinging red as well.
Arapaima tilted his head to press a kiss to Alex's palm, reaching up to cup Alex's hand before bringing his other to Alex's face, shifting so they were facing each other fully and pulling Alex closer. He waited a second when their faces were just breaths apart, head tilted just slightly and staring into Alex's eyes, waiting. Alex exhaled slowly and gave the slightest of nods, and Arapaima was connecting their lips with the quietest of hums.
The kiss started slow and chaste, with Arapaima's hand a gentle guide on Alex's face still no matter how many times they had done this, while Alex's own arms slowly curled around Arapaima's neck. Arapaima's hands drifted down eventually to Alex's waist, pressing his fingers in at the shoulders then his sides as he passed. Alex leaned more into Arapaima, creeping his fingers into Arapaima's hair as they broke briefly for breath.
Alex pressed in first this time, and pushed at Arapaima's lips lightly with his tongue. His boyfriend was all too happy to open his mouth slightly, fingers tightening at his waist and pulling Alex practically into his lap. The kiss grew slick fast as Alex explored Arapaima's mouth, tasting the sea on his tongue, and Alex knew his face had to be on fire at the sounds but he kept going back for more.
He's not sure how long they were making out, hands traversing slowly and easily. At some point Arapaima's hands had crept under his shirt and Alex was unconsciously pressing into the touches he left along his sides and chest, while Alex had made a mess of Arapaima's hair and was holding some of the strands so tightly Alex wondered briefly if it hurt. But none of that is what had taken Alex out of the moment — what had was the audible exhale and shudder that ran underneath him, the puff of breath against his mouth and the unintentional shaky tilt up from underneath him. It made Alex far more aware of what they were doing.
He swallowed as he tucked his face into Arapaima's neck and shifted slightly, only to freeze when Arapaima's hands spasmed against his sides and Alex felt another minute jerk, becoming very aware of the bulge he hadn't realized he was pressing against. When Alex stilled so did Arapaima, just for a moment before he tilted his head and pressed a kiss to Alex's temple, then his cheek, before gently pushing Alex back by the chest without moving Alex from atop him.
He did take his hands off of Alex to sign.
"Sorry, I— You just feel really good. Do you want to stop?"
Alex blinked, watching him sign. His mouth felt dry and his heart was pounding, but Arapaima didn't move another inch while he waited for Alex to respond. They'd talked about it — about sex, pretty early on in their relationship. Arapaima had been very open about it and wanted to make sure Alex knew they could talk about anything he wanted — or didn't want — to do. And Alex… hadn't not wanted to try anything, at the time, but he hadn't felt ready then and didn't feel like he could go there yet.
That was months ago now, though, and Alex could feel his own hard on that he wasn't sure when it started, and his boyfriend was laying underneath him, taking deep breaths to calm down and looking gorgeous, slightly sweaty with ruffled hair spread against the arm of the couch. Alex still didn't think he was ready to delve further into sex but maybe…
Alex took in a shaky breath and hesitantly ground down against Arapaima. His own dick twitched in his pants as a moan caught in Arapaima's throat.
"I… I don't want to stop."
Alex watched Arapaima swallowed, then nodded. "What do you want to do? Anything you want."
"I… What we were doing? I… no more than this, right now," Alex said, shifting again to be a bit more comfortable rolling down on Arapaima. "And… take this off?" Alex tugged at Arapaima's tank, and he easily sat up slightly to pull it over his head and let it fall to the floor. Alex's mouth watered again at the sight, bringing his hands to caress over Arapaima's chest and stomach, tracing the muscles and enjoying feeling the shiver it sent through Arapaima. His muscles were softer than Alex's, less sculpted for the physique but still there, belying the strength just underneath his skin.
While Alex touched all he desired Arapaima still hadn't moved to touch Alex again, watching him with half-lidded eyes. Alex traced the muscles of Arapaima's arms, down to his hands before slipping his fingers over Arapaima's and bringing his hands to Alex's thighs. Alex swallowed nervously, having been careful not to move too much himself quite yet, unsure of how he was supposed to do it.
He debated how to ask before slowly leaning down, releasing Arapaima's hands to cup his face again. Arapaima's fingers flexed against his thighs, and part of Alex wished he'd taken off their pants too but also knew that would be way too quick still for him. He traced his thumbs under Arapaima's eyes. "Help me?"
Alex felt Arapaima breathe in as he tilted his head up to capture Alex's lips in another kiss, and as he did it Alex's own breath shuddered out as Arapaima rolled his hips up and pulled Alex's down at the same time, his hands shifting to just over Alex's butt. The friction sent a jolt of pleasure through Alex, and when Arapaima did it again he moaned into Arapaima's mouth, fingers once again clenching in his hair.
Arapaima kept it slow, and eventually Alex started moving with the rhythm set. A particularly stronger roll of their hips sometime later, when Alex had thoroughly lost track of the time, lost in the tight grip of Arapaima's hands and the friction and the taste of his mouth and the sounds of his cut-off moans, and Alex was caught off-guard by the sudden spike of pleasure that overwhelmed him. His muscles locked up and he pushed to keep the friction against Arapaima even as he pulled away from panting into Arapaima's mouth to instead do it in his neck, pushing his face into the flushed skin.
He was shaking slightly when his senses started to slowly bleed back into focus. His head was still tucked into Arapaima's neck, and Arapaima was pressing soft, gentle kisses into his temple while one hand held Alex steady and the other traced comfortingly across his back. Alex took a deep breath then another, going lax against Arapaima as he tilted his head out of his neck.
Arapaima looked down at him and smiled, bringing the hand not tracing Alex's back up to push his sweaty bangs from his eyes. Alex hummed and placed a chaste kiss to Arapaima's jaw before slowly trying to sit up slightly.
He grimaced at the wet, sticky feeling in his shorts, but tried to ignore it for the most part to look down at his boyfriend. "What can I do for you?" Alex asked softly, and frowned when Arapaima shook his head. "C'mon, I want to. You got me off." But Arapaima shook his head again.
Before Alex could try more, because he wanted to make Arapaima feel just as good, even if what they could do was limited, Arapaima took one of Alex's hands and let it rest near his own thigh, hovering just over his crotch without touching. He nudged Alex's hand down slightly to prompt him to touch if he wanted, and Alex hesitantly did, eyes widening slightly when greeted with wet fabric. His face felt way too hot now, but as he withdrew his hand he realized Arapaima's own cheeks were red and the blush was seeping down to his chest.
"You felt way too good," Arapaima signed as explanation with a bashful smile on his face, and Alex could feel his heart want to try beating out of his chest. Instead he laughed slightly, mostly to break the nerves because he really didn't know what to do now that they were done, and leaned in to press a quick kiss to Arapaima's lips because that felt right enough. "Want to clean up and change, and maybe watch a movie?"
Alex thought about it for a moment, before nodding. "I'd like that, yeah."
-
Cuddled into Arapaima's bed in an extra pair of pajamas while his clothes were in the wash, and having called his grandparents to let them know he would be home later tonight than expected, Alex relaxed into Arapaima's chest and breathed deeply the salty ocean smell that clung to Arapaima. Arapaima's arms tightened slightly around Alex as the movie they'd picked droned on in the background — it was a random action movie playing on one of the TV channels, and Alex had felt too tired by then to even bother seeing the name Arapaima signed him.
If he had to pick, he'd probably say this was his favorite part of his time with Arapaima, cuddled under his mountain of blankets, fingers lazily tracing his back lulling him to sleep.
ID: A digital drawing of Alex Mullner and my oc Arapaima. They're sitting next to each other, Alex turned away and rubbing tears from his eyes, holding a music box. Arapaima is looking at Alex in sympathy, slight tears in his eyes, and resting a hand on his knee. /End ID.
This has been stuck in my head for a while - I wanna attempt to write the scene sometime as well, but I gotta refamiliarize myself with Alex ^^
Warnings: Implied homophobia but never outright stated, lmk if I need to add anything ^^
Summary:
Marlon and Gil are running away together.
This was insane.
“This is insane,” Marlon echoed his thoughts, but the wild grin on his face did nothing to dissuade Gil. Gil reflected the grin as he slammed the suitcase closed.
“It was your idea,” Gil reminded and shoved the suitcase to Marlon. His partner chuckled while hauling it over his shoulder, picking up his own while Gil retrieved his cane from where it rested against the bed.
“Well they’re not gonna give us permission, and I thought you wanted to go on a true adventure? Where better to do it than a magical forest and haunted cave?”
“Allegedly magical and haunted,” Gil corrected and followed Marlon out the door, “but how could I ever say no to you?”
Marlon’s grin softened, and if he weren’t carrying their luggage Gil had no doubt he would have been pulled into a hug then and there. Marlon reached out anyways to try winding his arm around Gil, but Gil evaded him for now.
“Not while we can still get caught. C’mon, sooner we get out of here, the sooner you can grab me all you want.”
Gil laughed quietly at the red that overtook Marlon’s face, his eyes widening briefly before narrowing in a playful scowl.
“You’re gonna eat those words, later.”
Gil hummed. “I look forward to it,” he said while getting into the car they were borrowing from Marlon’s sister indefinitely, Marlon shoving the suitcases into the backseat before taking the driver’s spot.
Once the car was started Marlon turned to Gil and held out his hand. The smile was less wild than before, a far more tender twinge to Marlon’s voice. “Ready for the best adventure we’ll ever go on?”
Gil accepted the hand and gave it a strong squeeze. “With you? Always.”
ID: A digital drawing of my 4 Stardew Valley farmers, just their heads. Top left is Kali, who has light skin, light blue frizzy hair, light brown eyes, and is wearing a yellow hat with a blue bow and skull accessory. Top right is Sour Patch, who has tan skin, fluffy short dark purple hair, bright purple star shaped eyes, has stubble, and is wearing a trash can lid as a hat. Bottom left is Aster, who has pale skin and brown eyes, two black earrings, sides of their head shaved close with a mohawk-style haircut with dark brown roots and the rest of their hair dyed purple. Bottom right is Arapaima, who has light desaturated skin, green eyes, and dark blue hair pulled into a very loose braid with the ends dyed teal. /End ID.
I finally made an icon for my sideblog @aedarisfarm ^^ it only took about a year for me to do 😅
It's the Feast of the Winter Star, and while it's been rough, Marnie knows she's found a good fresh start in her life, and if she could have this, things can't be too bad.
Feast of the Winter Star – Marnie always enjoyed the holiday, especially after Jas and Shane had moved in with her. Everyone gathering in the town square and enjoying the festivities, the kids getting excited over all the presents, the food…
She had felt morose sometimes, with where everyone would sit – she used to long for Lewis to join her, Jas, and Shane’s table, even if the two didn’t know about their relationship. But Lewis avoided her like a plague beyond the formal welcome he gave everyone at the feast.
This year though…
“Mister Marlon! Mister Gil!” Jas squealed from the tree, abandoning Vincent and their toys the moment the two adventurers reached her sight. She had two gifts clutched in her arms and Malorn paused in pushing Gil to their table once she was close enough. Jas beamed up at them as she held out the wrapped presents. “For you!”
“Well thank ya kindly, little lady,” Marlon said as he took the blue and silver gift Jas held out for him. Gil nodded his thanks to Jas, never one for many words, but he patted his lap and Jas happily and carefully climbed up onto him. He must have said something that Marnie couldn’t hear from her distance away, as he held the gift back to Jas and they both began to open the red and gold wrapped present.
Marnie watched as they reacted to the gifts – paintings Jas had made in an art lesson Leah had helped Penny hold, frames Marnie had commissioned from Robin keeping them safe. She sighed as Jas began chatting excitedly to them, and the two men were nodding and responding eagerly – well, Marlon was, Gil would absolutely just be humming in response unless it was prudent he say something, he was always concerned about being too rough-sounding for Jas’ ears – and she couldn’t help but melt.
A chuckle from next to her. “I didn’t think she’d trap them this quickly,” Shane said beside her, leaning into Marnie’s space.
“You know how excited she was to give them those, she was counting down the days.”
“It’s sweet they’re indulging her.”
Marnie shrugged. “They care about her – about you both.”
“And you,” Shane added, and when Marnie looked at him he was giving her a gentle grin. “I’m glad you decided to give them a chance. It’s nice to see you smile more.”
She startled, brow furrowing. “What do you mean?” Smile more? Did… did he think she was sad before? Was she that obvious?
His smile faltered and he leaned away, just slightly. But then he glanced back to Marlon, Gil, and Jas and tension bled out of his shoulders. “I don’t know. I know you were stressed, after taking me and Jas in, and I know I didn’t make it easy. It’s not that you weren’t happy, but seeing you now… it’s like… you’re happier more.” He huffed and shook his head. “I don’t think I’m making sense.”
Marnie reached over and wrapped her arm around his shoulders, pulling him in. He went easily into her embrace as she turned her attention back to the trio. She was quiet for a moment, before releasing a long breath and leaning her head on his. “Actually… I think I know what you mean. I am happier. I don’t… it wasn’t just you and Jas, I was stressed but there was more going on and… and I think this… them, were a fresh start even I didn’t realize I needed until now.”
As they spoke, Gil and Marlon were finally able to make it to their table with a still chattering Jas. “Marlon, Gil!” Marnie greeted with a grin, letting go of Shane to stand; her cheeks flushed pink when Marlon leaned forward to kiss her cheek.
“Evening Marnie, Shane,” he said with a nod towards her nephew. Shane raised the glass he had picked up – non-alcoholic this year, for Jas’ sake.
“Happy Winter Star Marlon, Gil.”
“Uncle Shane! Aunt Marnie! They love my paintings!”
Marlon chuckled and ruffled her hair, carefully enough to not mess up her bow too much and she giggled. “She has a future career as an artist awaiting her, that’s for sure.”
“We’re glad you could make it this year,” Marnie said, pulling first Marlon into a hug, and then stooping down to hug Gil and press her own kiss to his cheek. He smiled slightly at her and rolled his chair up to the table, nudging Jas to a different one so he could sit properly with them.
“We wouldn’t have missed it, thank ya for inviting us.”
“Of course! You both have always been welcome, of course, but it is nice to spend the feast together. I’m glad you said yes. How’s your leg, Marlon? And your hands, Gil?”
Conversation flowed easily and quickly after that, Jas quieting as she ate to instead listen attentively as Gil and Marlon recounted some adventure they had been on during one Winter Star night, Shane interjecting his own jokes to spark a laugh from her or Gil.
She basked in the warmth, in those she loved around her, enjoying each other’s company. Gil and Marlon presented them all with gifts. Wooden carvings from Marlon, small little things whittled with care – little wooden dolls for Jas to add to her collection and ready to be painted, a family of chicks for Shane and another carving of Charlie, and a recreation of the family from The Miracle At Coldstar Ranch for Marnie. Crocheted garments from Gil – a purple scarf and new green bow for Jas that had her grinning from ear to ear, a Tunnelers sweater for Shane which left him blinking in surprise, and hand warmers for Marnie in a deep red that she adored.
Shane had bought snowglobes for the both of them on a trip from Zuzu City, featuring adventure movie themes that got hearty laughs out of both men when Shane recounted them, spiraling into more stories that were far more entertaining than the movies. And Marnie had commissioned Emily, with wool from her sheep spun to make soft new pajamas, taking into account Gil’s chair and Marlon’s occasional sensory issues, patterned with their favorite monsters.
The meal passed quickly – quicker than Marnie realized, sitting and talking with her heart warming. The past few years had been rough, and she doubted they were going to get much easier, but if she could have more days like this…
More days of Gil’s raspy laugh, of Marlon’s exaggerated gestures, of Shane’s smiles and Jas’ giggled questions…
She couldn’t think of anything that would bring her down, if she could have this.
Marnie loses track of time while with Gil and Marlon, and ends up staying the night!
Marnie hadn’t exactly planned to stay the night.
Marlon had invited her for a dinner in the Guild, and then she got roped into playing a game of cards. One game turned to three, then five, then fifteen, and by then she started to lose track of the number and time, pulled into the trance that was their laughter and stories of previous adventures.
When she realized how late it was, she had fretted about having to make the trip all the way down to her ranch, especially in the dark. Marlon offered to walk her, but his knee had been acting up - despite the fact he would deny it if she brought up this fact, that he would insist despite her and Gil’s protests to pushing himself when he had been wincing with each step earlier this evening - and she would be even more worried about him having to walk back up alone. It was Gil who offered her their bed - offered to share it.
Marlon had flushed a deep crimson, and Marnie could feel her own cheeks warm at his offer, but Gil was so nonplussed, so casual with the offer, that Marnie was agreeing before she knew what she was saying.
A phone call to Shane, who had stayed home tonight to watch Jas, to make sure he didn’t continue waiting up for her. He’d made a teasing remark about being safe and she promptly wished him a good night and hung up to his chuckling, her cheeks burning once again that evening. A loose shirt and pants that Marlon and Gil offered when the three realized Marnie didn’t have any night clothes with her later, and now they had to find a way to settle into bed.
The bed wasn’t small, not when Gil and Marlon already needed to share it often, but it was small when considering trying to find a way to fit three adults in it. There were multiple adjustments, figuring out who needed to lay in the center or closest to the edge of the bed, who had muscles or limbs which needed definite accommodating.
Eventually though, they settled. Marlon closest to the wall, his aching leg resting atop Marnie’s and the other curling underneath hers. He had an arm tucked under her head and another thrown over her waist, reaching across to Gil, who lay on Marnie’s other side, pulling him into Marnie’s side further when he grumbled half-heartedly about being squished -- no real fight in his voice. Marnie was facing Marlon, more comfortable on her side, but when Gil slung one of his own arms over her stomach, curling up to her chest, she moved to entwine their fingers and bring their hands to her heart. He sighed into her hair, and despite the awkward feeling of limbs poking into her from all sides and being squished between the two men, Marnie felt herself melting into them.
Gil was the first to fall asleep, his breaths not quite a snore but somewhere between that and a wheeze, and each breath tickled Marnie’s ear as Gil nuzzled into her hair more unconsciously. A frown was etched onto his face even if she couldn’t see it; she could feel it pressing into her. She felt more than she heard the chuckle from Marlon, feeling his hand drift up to trace across Gil’s face above her, and she felt the tension bleed from the body behind her, before moving to caress her own cheek.
She let out a slow sigh and blinked at Marlon’s chest, tilting her face ever so slightly to press a soft kiss to his collarbone. Marlon tilted his own head to brush a kiss to her temple, the smile almost soothing her to sleep. Before she drifted off, she heard Marlon’s low voice whisper, to which she offered a hum in the same tune before succumbing to her exhaustion.
When 1.6 came out, I loved the additions to fishing (targeted bait, smoked fish, being able to make legend roe/put them in ponds, the fishing chests, etc etc etc) and fishing has always been my favorite part of the game so.... I created a farmer very centered around fishing! I had also been fixated on River Monsters again, and that added to the fuel.
So, here's a newer addition to Aedaris Farm - Arapaima! This is just a rough ref as I figure out how to draw tattoos and fish. Some fun stuff about him under the cut!
Some Fun Facts
He/Him pronouns, gay, and is around 24 years old.
He gets a new tattoo every year after turning eighteen.
He communicates in sign! He isn't deaf, but he hates speaking and his own voice, grew up with deaf family members and found he much prefers signing over actually speaking, so just uses it to communicate instead. It feels far more natural to him.
Got bitten by a shark on his arm when he was younger and diving with his mom.
Arapaima's not necessarily reserved, but he'll rarely seek out the company of others. He becomes friends with people through convenience of location, most of the time, or if they seek him out first. He very much enjoys the company of others though, even if he doesn't seek it out.
Haaaaaaates the mines. The only reason he goes to them is to fish in the underground lakes. Refuses to step foot in Skull Caverns after hearing about it from the others, and would honestly rather make out with Clint than have to go to any floors beside the lakes.
Very empathetic and will cry if he sees other people cry.
Loves cooking for others but he himself is a picky eater.
Physically affectionate - the few friends he has + the other farmers, he will usually have an arm tossed over a shoulder or waist, is very happy to cuddle with people or act as a human jungle gym for kids, and VERY touchy with his intimate partners. Will give lots of forehead or cheek kisses to whoever allows him to as well.
Tattoos
Arapaima currently has tattoos of the following fish in descending order (designing them pending): Arapaima (neck), Red bellied piranha, Alligator gar, Glyphis shark, Bluntnose sixgill shark, Goliath grouper
Along the rest of his arm, he wants tattoos of: Stonefish (irl one, not the sdv one), Wolffish, Payara, Goblin shark, Northern snakehead
Along his back, he wants tattoos of the Legendary Fish
Relationships
Arapaima lives on the farm with the others - how did he join them? Sour Patch dragged him along, moving to Pelican Town was the day he met Aster and Kali.
Very quickly became friends with Aster, bonding over their love of fishing.
Kali he grew closer to over a much longer time, but are practically inseparable once they are friends (unless Kali goes to the mines).
He and Sour Patch had a fwb relationship in their late high school and Sour Patch's early college years, the sex fizzled out over time but they still kept up their friendship.
In the valley, he adopts a little black kitten and names it Sareng. She's very cuddly and loves curling up on Arapaima's shoulders. She'll accompany him fishing sometimes.
To no one's surprise he becomes best friends with Willy almost instantly, and you can usually find him wherever Willy is if he's not with one of the other farmers. When he goes to the saloon, he will sit with Willy most of the time and they'll talk about their catches or they'll share embarrassing/funny fishing stories.
Became closer friends with Marnie after finding out about her and Lewis' relationship, and has a really strong relatability to her situation with him. Tries far more gently than the other farmers to get her to ditch Lewis because of this.
Befriended Vincent accidentally - the kid started seeking him out after discovering Arapaima usually had live worms or bugs with him (for fishing, but still) and encouraged Vincent's antics because it was a form of exploration. Now Arapaima tries to make time specifically to hang out with Vincent, and is starting to teach him how to fish.
Alex, he fell for very accidentally but very hard. It was a slow process mostly because they couldn't communicate very well when they first met (Arapaima signing, Alex didn't know sign, Arapaima wasn't going to spend a bunch of time writing what he wanted to say when he could be doing something else, and so they just barely interacted). They ran into each other constantly though in the summer, and Alex began picking up sign/started learning it on his own terms. On slow summer days he'd teach Alex sign.
Arapaima doesn't really realize he's slowly fallen for Alex until Alex's 8-heart event, when it hits him hard just how much he cares for him, seeing Alex crying over his mother's death, and wanting nothing more than to ease his pain in some way, but he has no idea how.
With another new year comes another Flower Dance that Marnie is to spend watching from the sidelines, truly single this time.Or so she thinks.
Marnie sighs when Arapaima asks how she’s liking this year’s Flower Dance. It doesn’t take much to exaggerate the sigh, playing up the dramatics just a bit to make it all more light-hearted, but it’s so close to how she really is feeling this year.
“Love is in the air,” she says, “and I’m still single.”
And it isn’t even a lie. At the start of the season, she officially broke up with Lewis, and for good. She can’t forget the look of almost relief from Shane, when she and him sat and spoke over some mocktails one evening after Jas was put to bed, and she had made her initial declaration. That alone quelled any doubts she had about her decision.
He smiles apologetically. “Who knows,” he signs, “maybe someone will ask you this year?”
Marnie can’t help the disbelieving laugh that escapes her. “I’m not too sure, I seem to have the worst luck when it comes to these sorts of events.” She shrugs. She did still dress up, as much as she dared with little expectation of actually dancing, the new sundress she had bought from Emily having raised her hopes a little more. But this close to the dance starting, she can’t deny that little bit of hope for a partner this year has faded away.
“Hold out hope,” Arapaima insists, and gives her arm a friendly squeeze. He’s called away by Alex, his dance partner this year, and bids her farewell for the afternoon.
She sighs again and leans against the fence, watching as the younger crowd find their partners. Only Arapaima and Sour Patch are dancing this year, of the four farmers, Haley graciously stepping down from her usual role as Flower Queen and Doctor Harvey very happily escaping from having to dance in front of everyone again. She won’t admit aloud to being envious, just a little, at seeing the young valley residents dance each year while she can only watch from the sidelines.
It makes her long for her youth, to relive the days before life got so busy and days so tiring (much as she adored Jas and Shane, and would never regret taking them in, it was still hard).
She won’t admit it aloud, but that doesn’t stop her from feeling it.
She doesn’t notice at first, when someone approaches her, lost in watching the small band Lewis hires each year for the festival prepare to play. Not until they clear their throat, and she startles, spinning in the direction of the voice.
“Marnie,” Marlon greets in a rough but soft voice, and Marnie blinks in surprise. He doesn’t come to every festival, but she’s seen him at the Flower Dance occasionally, though never has she seen him approach anyone. He’s smiling slightly, and it softens his features further, but his face is tinged red and she wonders briefly if the sun is too much for him with all the time he must spend in the caves.
“Marlon,” she returns with a smile of her own, slightly sheepish as she continues, “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you come over.”
He waves off her apology. “I’m sorry for startlin’ ya. I… forget to not be quiet, sometimes,” he says. He clears his throat and glances away briefly, and when he looks at her again his cheeks flush a little darker. “Ya look lovely today, Marnie.”
Her eyes widen at the compliment, but the smile and slight warming of her own face she quite can’t stifle. “Oh, well, thank you, Marlon.” She takes him in a bit more consciously now, and she smiles less bashfully but more kind when she says, “You look quite handsome yourself.”
And he does. He’s wearing more formal clothes than she has ever seen him in, reminiscent of his usual adventuring clothing that everyone has grown used to but looking less like he was about to delve into the mines. His hair was combed just enough that it framed his face, and his mustache and beard seemed to have been trimmed recently.
“Thank ye kindly.” The music begins to play, and Marnie glances back at the couples beginning to dance. Both Arapaima and Sour Patch are doing better this year than they have any previous years, and all of them actually look much happier to be dancing than before. Marlon watches with her, though as they watch the group dance she can’t help but feel the longing to join them return.
The traditional flower dance comes to an end, and everyone around claps as the couples ease out of their final poses. The band waits for the applause to die down before beginning the next song, and some couples extract themselves from the group while the others stay to continue the festivities.
Marlon clears his throat again and when Marnie returns her gaze back to him, she’s met with an outstretched hand, the other tucked behind his back. “Marnie, may I- have this dance?”
She blinks and knows for certain that her cheeks are almost as red as her barn, now. “You… you want to dance with me?”
“I would be honored to dance with you,” he swears, more confident now. Her heart skips a beat at the declaration.
Marnie beams at Marlon. “Then I would love to dance,” she says as she takes his hand. He grins, wider than she has ever seen him smile before, and leads her out into the grass.
The music is still rather traditional, but not as formal as the first dance of the afternoon always is, faster and upbeat in comparison.
Marlon’s not the greatest dancer, Marnie learns, but he twirls her in time with the music well enough and each time she can’t help but giggle. She doesn’t pay close attention to the other dancers, focusing instead on getting used to how Marlon dances and leads and falling more easily into step with him. And when the first song ends, and the second one starts right after, she doesn’t hesitate to pull him into it.
-
When the music finally stops and everyone begins to trickle out of the clearing, she walks back to her ranch with Shane carrying a tuckered-out Jas, still smiling and with plans for a Friday night dinner.
Elliott is thinking of proposing to Sebastian, but his cabin is too small and needs an upgrade to fit in another person. So one day when he thinks Sebastian isn't home he goes up to the mountain to secretly ask for an upgrade from Robin, but Sebastian walks in on them.
I was also thinking of the timeline being after Elliott's 10 heart event but before Sebastian's to fit your other fic, "Together".
Warnings: None! Lmk if there's any I need to add ^^
Summary:
Elliott considers what he could get Sebastian for their two-year anniversary. There's just one little problem…
Luckily, he knows exactly who to ask for help.
Elliott leaned back in his chair, rocking it back slightly onto just two legs. He stared at his calendar, pinned above his writing desk and scribbled over with a myriad of notes and dates. At the end of the month, circled just about a dozen times and with little hearts doodled around it, was his and Sebastian’s two-year anniversary.
He still hadn’t decided on a gift.
What do you give someone, who has brought you absolute joy for 224 days? Who has been a light in a storm you didn’t even realize you were in? Who was willing to change to make things work and who helped change you? Who has become one of your most cherished treasures in the world?
What do you give someone?
The sappy, romance-adoring part of himself had an idea.
He’d been thinking about it for a while.
The letter from Lewis, Welwick’s vision at the fair, and Gunther’s recent book recommendations certainly did not help… but they just made him consider the idea more seriously, rather than passerby daydreams.
A mermaid’s pendant.
He may not have grown up in the valley, but the stories were not kept secret from him. And when he and Sebastian had been more open with their relationship, when others discovered how long they had been together already, it was soon that people began asking not a matter of if but when. Robin’s teasing questions, Evelyn reminiscing with Elliott on the mornings he visited her garden for inspiration about her and George’s proposal, Sam and Abigail poking fun at Sebastian good-naturedly.
Elliott would watch Sebastian, anytime someone brought it up.
In the beginning, he would bluster and his face would tinge pink but he’d roll his eyes, would say “yeah, right” or “we haven’t been serious for that long” and Elliott was never hurt, really, by these statements, because he understood and Sebastian was right, and while of course he had hoped everything would work out and they’d live happily ever after… even he knew one could not predict the future.
But as of late, Sebastian’s face would not tinge pink and he would not roll his eyes and he would not bluster. Lately, Sebastian would grow quiet, and not his usual quiet, but more contemplative, like when he visits the docks on a rainy day and looks out into the distance and just thinks. Lately, his face would bloom a deeper red and he’d look away.
Sometimes, he’d shrug and say “maybe” or “we’ll see where things go”.
Elliott hadn’t figured out a good way to broach the subject, just yet. He was terrible with this, talking about his feelings and discussing big changes. He remembered confessing to Sebastian and how he had nearly screwed that up, tripping over his words and almost making Sebastian think that Elliott didn’t even want to be friends anymore. But, well… he did hope that maybe, possibly, Sebastian would want to get married.
There was one little problem, however.
Literally.
Elliott glanced around his cabin. His bed tucked against the wall opposite his desk, his piano swamping about a fourth of the room. His bookcase takes up even more of the floor.
He didn’t have much, and for one person it worked out perfectly fine.
But if there were two people…
He sighed, leaning forward again, his chair hitting the wooden floor with a loud thump that reverberated through the cabin. He didn’t even have a kitchen, or any sort of appliances to actually cook. He usually swung by the saloon for dinner, or shared dinner with Willy or Leah. It wouldn’t be practical to have another person move in when, really, his cabin was barely big enough for one person.
He wouldn’t be able to move in with Sebastian’s family, either. He had no doubt that he’d be welcomed - Robin already did her best to make him feel at home when he visited, or was invited to dinner. Maru was easy to talk with, when it came to topics of sci-fi or medicine. And Demetrius was Demetrius - a little standoffish, he didn’t quite seem to get Elliott, but he was polite and still welcomed him for dinners or when he visited Sebastian. But their home was already constantly bustling, and there wasn’t much space for another person there.
And, most important of all, Elliott knew Sebastian already didn’t wish to remain there.
Elliott would never ask him to stay somewhere he didn’t want, and it would be cruel, he thinks, to ask Sebastian to somehow fit Elliott into the home he already wanted to leave just so they could be married.
He sighed heavily and slumped onto his desk, resting his cheek on his arm. What to do…
-
It was by chance, the next day that he found himself walking up to Sebastian’s, the memory of Robin offering to renovate his cabin anytime hitting him earlier in the morning and with a text from Sebastian that he would be at band practice all afternoon, but would stop by Elliott’s this evening. Much as he loved Leah, and she too had offered multiple times to help expand or decorate his cabin, even she conceded that Robin was more skilled when it came to architecture.
And besides, there was more than one thing he needed to ask Robin.
One thing at a time, Elliott reminded himself, knocking on the door before opening it - because no matter what Robin said about always being welcome, he still had manners - and returned Robin’s smile when she caught sight of him.
“Elliott! It’s so good to see you,” she rounded her desk as she spoke, enveloping Elliott into a tight hug. “I’m sorry, but Sebby’s not here. He’s with Sam and Abby right now in town.”
“I know,” Elliott reassures, extracting himself from her hug. “I actually came here because I needed to speak with you. I was hoping to ask you about home upgrades?”
“Oh? Well, by all means, take a seat!” She pulled one of the chairs from the wall and moved it to her desk, gesturing for Elliott to take a seat. “Yoba, I remember building that cabin of yours, let me pull up the layout. You haven’t changed it since then, have you?”
“Not really, no. Nothing besides furniture of course.”
Robin nods as she opens a large book, flipping through the first couple dozen pages before stopping. She pushes it so the book is between them, and Elliott sees the blueprint of his cabin, exactly as she had shown him when he had first come to town and needed a place to stay.
“Alright, you said you were interested in home upgrades? What did you have in mind?”
-
Back and forth it went, Robin pulling out another book to sketch their ideas into as they spoke. She would ask questions upon questions, from how large he wanted a room to be, to the color or style of the walls, if he wanted to change anything about the existing room. She took meticulous notes, and Elliott truly lost track of time as Robin engrossed him further into the process of working out the details.
Eventually, the questions about the house renovations tapered off, and Robin began to create a new blueprint for his cabin that she said she would place into her book, once the renovations were complete. The questions grew more casual as he watched her map out the new blueprint.
“So, what sparked you to upgrade now?” she eventually asked. “You’ve lived in Pelican Town for a few years, but are only now expanding.”
“Well,” Elliott started, and he could feel his face warm just slightly from nerves, “that’s actually something else I wanted to talk to you about.”
Robin paused in her drawing to look up at Elliott, tilting her head, and Elliott couldn’t help but notice that this, this is where Sebastian gets his curious look that he tries so hard to stifle around others to feign disinterest, but has been so open with Elliott for so long now. “Oh?”
“Yes.” Elliott took a deep breath. He prayed to Yoba his words would come out clear, that he wouldn’t push the wrong idea across. “You see, I’ve been thinking about Sebastian and I, and where we are in our relationship. I’ve heard about a certain tradition in the valley, and, well… my cabin is too small as it is, if it were to ever fit two people…” he trailed off, realizing suddenly that he had looked away from Robin with a steadily warming face, and he snapped his eyes up.
He was greeted with her hands covering her mouth, but behind them he could see what he could only describe as a beaming smile.
She cleared her throat and dropped her hands, but didn’t manage to stifle her grin. “So, you want to marry-”
Robin was cut off by the door swinging open, and Elliott jumped as it hit the wall, not terribly hard but loudly. Robin’s mouth shut so fast and eyes grew so wide, that Elliott spun around to see who had entered only to find-
Sebastian, standing in the doorway of his own home, keyboard slung over his back and blinking in confusion at Elliott sitting in front of his mother’s desk.
Silence, for about thirty seconds, and Elliott could see Sebastian trying to work out what was going on before he had a chance to ask anything else. When he finally did speak, it was slow, the gears still turning in his brilliant head.
“El, what… are you doing here? I thought you were gonna be home?”
The warmth which had been on his cheeks since he started speaking with Robin only grew deeper as he stood, unsure really on what to say, because he hadn’t been planning on telling Sebastian just yet that he was hoping to upgrade his home. And, he usually did tell Sebastian when he would be stopping by, and rarely did he ever come up to the mountains on his own terms unless it was to the spa.
Before Elliott could think of anything to say, Sebastian’s eyes caught sight of the desk and his eyebrows rose. He stepped closer to get a better look, and a minute amount of tension bled out of Sebastian but upon seeing the blueprint of a different layout of the cabin he was growing so used to, confusion plagued his face once more.
“You’re renovating your cabin?” He looked up to Elliott, head tilting the way Robin’s did just a few minutes ago, puzzled but determined to understand the situation presented to him.
“Um, yes! I ah, it was a bit of a spur of the moment thought, really.”
“You never mentioned wanting to upgrade it,” Sebastian said, not accusatory but still something in his voice was off - a little hurt, if Elliott had to guess, and his heart clenched. “You’ve said before you liked how cozy it is.”
“Well, yes, of course-” Elliott stammered. “And I do love it the way it is now, but-”
“But Elliott stumbled across some cookbooks this morning at the library, and came up here wanting to discuss getting a kitchen,” Robin chimed in. “I convinced him to upgrade a liiitle more,” she said with a small laugh. “It was all very ‘spur of the moment’, as Elliott has put it.”
“I was going to mention it later when you came over,” Elliott added sheepishly, thankful also that Robin did not mention the true reason he was seeking to renovate his cabin.
The hurt that had creeped into Sebastian’s eyes dissipated at this, and Elliott could see even his hold on his keyboard strap relaxing. He even chuckled slightly after a moment, shaking his head and looking again between the blueprint laid out on the desk and Elliott. “Of course you’d randomly decide to renovate your place because of some cookbooks.”
Elliott laughed even knowing his cheeks were flushing a deeper red, and he nodded to the blueprint. “Would you like to see what I have in mind? Your input as well would be very valuable, if you wouldn’t mind sharing.”
And - there it was, a spark in Sebastian’s eyes that Elliott loved to see, a glittering of happiness at being asked to join a discussion, to share his thoughts. Elliott vowed the first time he saw it to at any chance return it to Sebastian’s expression, and he was filled with pure joy each time he managed it. The spark was only emphasized by the soft smile Sebastian gave in return to the invitation.
Robin was already pulling up a chair as Sebastian nodded. “I’d love to.”
Sitting back down, side-by-side with Sebastian and across from Robin, Elliott figured he would broach the subject once more with Robin another time.
He wasn’t aware that she already had her answer for him.
