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Andulka
Claire Keane
YOU ARE THE REASON
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
The Bowery Presents
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@theartofmadeline
we're not kids anymore.
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Not today Justin
Origami Around
cherry valley forever
hello vonnie
bliss lane
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
sheepfilms
Discoholic 🪩
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Sweet Seals For You, Always
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@aerann
Must not pick that scab off. It will not in fact get rid of the scab and just create a different scab. The scab is not done cooking yet. I am completely normal about scabs. <-gripping the edges of his chair so tightly the wood is starting to crack
I got a job at a gas station across from a casino and a guy keeps coming in to buy whole cartons of cigarettes and talks in the third person calling himself "snake eyes pete" and every time I tell him his total hes like "tell ya what if old Pete rolls a snake eyes why dont you give it to him for free?" and he rolls the same set of loaded dice on the counter and it does not matter how many times he rolls snake eyes I will not give him the cartons for free he gets so mad
Snakeyes Pete is from Toronto he gave me a button once that said "Canadians have the best luck" and i said i thought that was the Irish and he said "I fucking hate the irish" and i said okay
idioms are always funnier in languages you do not understand, especially when a native speaker is struggling to explain and actively digesting how ridiculous it is in real time
Somebody ate a hole in the flour.
Any idea who it could be?
the ship of theseus wikipedia article in 2003. 20 years later, after 1792 total edits, 0% of its original phrasing remains. (x)
And yet it's still the same article, the article designated to be about theseus' ship. Debate solved i guess
easy as fuck . were they stupid?
(USAmerican trying to imagine a societal environment) Okay, so picture a highway,
inability to correctly perceive 3d objects is in fact far more dangerous when someone is driving a car next to you then when they're like, sending emails to you.
can we focus on the gnome for a second
wait sorry i was not wearing my glasses. that is a cat
these are the people i have to share a highway with
I love getting unaccompanied minors (kids flying alone) who so clearly just. Don't want to be here lol. Sometimes I get to know a little of their story, like their parents are divorced, or a family member died and they're heading to the funeral, but usually they just don't want to talk about it and that's fine. But I always treat the flight like it's a challenge to make them smile. I offer them snacks and soda but that's never enough, that's whatever, they could get those from an airport vending machine. Chump change. So then I tell the worst jokes. Just the most embarrassing, kindergarten teacher, annoying dad jokes you can think of. And those always get a groan, or a "Seriously??" And that's my in! Now I can say "Why, what's your idea of a good joke? No, come on hotshot, make your best joke, let's see it." And they hem and they haw but of course they eventually tell me their very best joke because kids are little competitive comedy goldmines. And it's always super funny, so I laugh, and that's where they slip up. Because you know what you almost always do when your joke successfully makes someone laugh? You smile. And I'm like. Gotcha. Rookie move. Now you're going to end up having a good time in spite of yourself. I win.
Did this with an 11yo u.m. today and he said "What did the ghost say to the other ghost?" And I said "What?" "Nothing. Ghosts aren't real."
I'm literally a flight attendant, offering snacks and drinks is my job
You would not believe your ass
If ten million largemouth bass.
desired you while the women flee
I'm trimming my bush #mybush
@quiddie this is what you did and i'm saying thank you
my girlfriend has invneted a new magic the gatherinf format and it fucking rules
ODS (Oulipo Dragon Scotsman) is a totally original 100-card singleton multiplayer format. you pick your 'Commissar', a legendary creature, to helm your deck. you must construct your deck only using cards within the color identity of your commissar. each player starts with a hand of seven cards and 40 life, with their Commissar in the command zone.
ODS is an eternal format, meaning cards from all of magic's history are legal--with the exception of silver-border cards, cards with the card type 'conspiracy', cards referencing 'ante', cards banned for being racist, cards that require dexterity (e.g. chaos orb), braids cabal minion, fastbond, karakas, mana crypt, panoptic mirror, shahrazad, oh and also every single card whose name contains the letter 'e'.
yes, that includes 'forest'.
this is basically the whole bit, it's EDH but without any cards containing the letter E. here's a list of legal commissars: https://www.moxfield.com/decks/OjzUXxpUbkOhXuEiI3IoJg
is 100 card singleton not your style? then perhaps ODStandard is the format for you, a 1v1 60-card constructed 4-of format where players can use any cards printed in a standard-legal set from dominaria united onward. As long as they don't contain the letter e.
it sounds like a shitpost and it kind of is but it's also a really fun way to play somewhat low-power magic and discover hidden gems that are usually overshadowed. we've been playing it quite a bit in our playgroup and having a lot of laughs when someone busts out some fucking insane weird-ass card like 'brass wasp'. try ods with your friends today :)
boobs up my ass
And out
Next up someone is going to claim that the Narnia series isn't kids books.
Kids books is probably not the best way to word it, you can enjoy them at every age, including your childhood, as you get older you may find new truths in them, but they're still good for any age.
I'm currently living in a two-cat household, and there's a thing that happens where the first cat is calling for me, the second cat shows up like "you rang?", and the first cat immediately smacks the second cat in the face like "not you, knucklehead". They do this every day.
The second cat always comes running when the first cat calls for me, even though it gets her dope-slapped with 100% reliability. I suspect she simply enjoys the attention.
Strictly speaking, "ultimate" means "last", not "best". It's often figuratively employed in the latter sense to suggest that the thing so described is the final word on the subject, after which nothing more need be said, but if we're being real technical, describing a game or movie that was so bad it killed its entire franchise as the "ultimate" is in fact correct.
@ffoxer replied:
Now I'm thinking about the prefix "pen," which as far as I can think I may have only ever seen in "penultimate"
It's Latin for "nearly" or "almost", and it does pop up in a few other English words. "Penultimate", "penumbra" and "peninsula" are the only ones I can think of that you'd even remotely expect to encounter in everyday speech, though; the rest are all medical or mathematical jargon.
#so peninsula means what? #almost island? #lmao (via @actualanxiousswampwitch)
That is the actual etymology of the word "peninsula", yes.
