mad, bad and dangerous to know

Dan. 19, Caerdydd, loser, occasional grumpy old man.

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

if teenagers are ever being mean to you just pull out any miscellaneous item you have on you at the moment and make up some bullshit term to scare them

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: we are going to punch you me *pulling out spoon*: have you lot ever been Uncle Jimmied

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: we are going to kick you me *pulling out an electric toothbrush*: have you all ever experienced a Norwegian Christmas…

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: we are going to unlawfully take your money me *taking car keys out of my pocket*: say, have any of you ever had a Pacific Ocean Garbage Patch…….

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: we are going to call you mean names me *taking Costco brand pair of socks out of my purse*: it’s been a while since i gave someone a Tropic Of Capricorn………….

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: we’re violent just for the fun of it ! me *microwaving a hard-boiled egg*: you’re all about to get a Matthew Broderick Jr.

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: we are going to spread rumors about you me *getting out my tube of rash cream*: don’t force me to give you a Chinese Whistling Garden

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: we are about to physically assault you me *pulling out cantaloupe*: seems like you rapscallions have never heard of the Screaming Astronaut

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: we are going to commit felonies me *pulling out handfuls of spaghetti*: I’m sorry you all have to experience the Kansas Turnpike …

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: i am preparing to steal an automotive vehicle me *taking out a roll of dental floss*: keep this sort of behavior up and you’re going to get the Rick Astley’s Crochet

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

teenagers: i plan to do acts of physical hooliganism! me *takes a Bop It out of my pocket*: I don’t normally do this but I’ll enjoy giving you a North Carolina Senator G.K. Butterfield

[animalbody]

if theres a day i dont reblog this assume i died

[smi1ebig]

[tuckerandcaboose-deactivated201]

so this just happened

[heartfeltdelight]

why in deathly hallows did they have everyone polyjuice themselves into harry when harry could have polyjuiced into a muggle and have been driven to safety away from the threat of death eaters who don’t know how to work things in the muggle world

who came up with these plans anyway

[thepast699-deactivated20200123]

dumbledore

[jemthecrystalgem]

McGonagall: So I have a plan to keep everyone out of danger.

Dumbledore: Better plan! Let’s put literally everybody in danger!

[therainbowoverme-blog]

[dajo42]

imagine showing up to work one day and all the windows are broken, stuff is all tipped over and scattered around the floor and it seems like there’s nobody around

but then you see this sign and somebody’s spray-painted a big red 0 over the number of days

and you hear a loud screech behind you

[c-teardrops]

So I don’t know if you knew but there are these new mouthwash bottles.

And when you squeeze the bottle the top fills up.

“Drink” it…

And no more will come out.

So here’s my proposition…

YOU WILL NEVER NEED A SHOT GLASS AGAIN

YOUR MOVE ALCOHOL INDUSTRY

[batmansymbol]

one of the most important things to me about harry potter is its portrayal of happiness. in the harry potter world, happiness isn’t just a feeling—it’s a weapon. look at how harry and his friends fight: with riddikulus, laughter stymies a creature made of fear; with expecto patronum, the very memory of happiness beats back the grim forces of depression.

the weaponization of positivity stretches beyond that. fred and george weasley’s inventions, meant for laughter, turn into arms against umbridge’s regime. and after their departure from hogwarts, their joke shop becomes not only the single bright spot in diagon alley (literally & figuratively) but a hub of defensive magic. the whole weasleys’ wizard wheezes narrative serves as maybe the clearest example in the series that happiness can act as both shield and sword.

there is something deeply empowering in a depiction of happiness as something so tangible and usable. as a profoundly depressed person, i often feel myself scrounging for happy memories and clutching them close; i find myself grasping for laughter in the dark. the physicalization of expecto patronum is not a quantum leap from reality. the boggart’s laughter as combat fuel, the weasleys’ levity as not just a choice but a difficult and defiant one—it’s all familiar.

the series has its share of darkness, but it revels most in the light. it lets us believe that the act of joy is not small, trivial, or inconsequential. happiness is something not just to be lived—it is to be wielded, on your own behalf and the behalves of the people around you, to battle against the world’s heavier elements. harry potter teaches us this.

[pennsasucky]

[afragileharm0ny-blog]

during a makeout session

me: fuck, not again

me: why is the what's new scooby doo theme stuck in my head

boy: what

me: nothing, never mind

me, internally: what's new scooby doo, we're coming after you, gonna sooolve that mystery

[thebabyanimals]

[babyanimalposts]

feeling down? you need this baby animal blog

[mothwood]

When you ask your lover what he is thinking, aren’t you really asking Do I occur to you? do I take place? Sometimes to walk toward anyone is the wilderness.

Christina Davis from Border Patrol (via atramentum)

[theproblematicblogger]

[graphicdesignblg]

[autumnshivers]

[123016123016]

[scorpiyoyoyo-deactivated2015112]

Heart Out // The 1975

[theswagofmalfoy-deactivated2012]