hold me down.

Matilda "Mattie" Douglas 15 years of age. Cooler than you.

[afuckinggremlin-blog]

✧

I would kill you. ✧ I would physically hurt you. ✧ I would attack you unprovoked. ✧ I would manipulate you. ✧ I dislike you. ✧ You annoy me. ✧ You scare me. ✧ You intimidate me. ✧ I hope I intimidate you. ✧ I pity you. ✧ You disgust me. ✧ I hate you. ✧ I’m indifferent toward you. ✧ I’d like to get to know you better. ✧   I’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ I’d like to be friends with you. ✧  I’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ I’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ You are my friend. ✧ You are my best friend. ✧ You are my mentor. ✧ I look up to you. ✧ I respect you. ✧ You are my hero. ✧ You inspire me. ✧ You are my enemy. ✧ You make me happy. ✧ I want to protect you. ✧ I would fight by your side. ✧ I consider you an equal. ✧ I think you are beneath me. ✧ I think you are above me. ✧ I would lie for you.✧ I would lie to you. ✧ I would sleep with you. ✧ I would sleep by your side. ✧ I would hug you. ✧ I would kiss you. ✧ You are family to me. ✧ I would die for you. ✧ I would kill for you. ✧ I would trust you with my life. ✧ I would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ I would trust you with a secret. ✧ I would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ I love you (platonically). ✧ I love you (romantically).

[afuckinggremlin-blog]

The silence is peaceful. From where she’s perched, she can hear owls, crickets, and the rustling of leaves. But the rest of the world is sleeping and she’s only just started to appreciate the tranquility in that. The tranquility of being alone; when the weight of downturned mouths and pitying eyes is non-existent. Some of them have the mind to stay quiet, Others... Others ask her how she’s doing, even if they’ve never bothered to ask before. Or worse, they say that they’re sorry for what happened to her, though they never elaborate on which part they’re talking about. It’s to the point where she can hear the empty apologies even when they remain unspoken. It’s to the point where she’s turned her phone on silent, ignored every single one of her friends’ attempts to hang out, and spent the majority of her time sleeping on the couch or sitting on the roof, mulling over how she’s meant to return to school now that everyone knows. Now that everyone’s sorry for “what happened” to her.

When she hears the creak of someone climbing out of the window behind her, she doesn’t even bother trying to hide the joint. Instead, she takes another hit and tucks her arm behind her head, holding it up in the wide empty space beside her as a silent offering. She hates her own voice with a passion. Even to her own ears, every word that leaves her mouth sounds so fucking pathetic. 

[afuckinggremlin-blog]

Part I: July 1st, 2016

The scariest part of the whole thing is the blackouts. The usual movement of time becomes twisted and warped beyond recognition, and that’s honestly what makes her panic about the situation the most. She remembers drinking with them, but she doesn’t remember what they talked about. She remembers being led up the stairs with a steadying arm around her shoulders, but she doesn’t remember why they needed to go upstairs to begin with. She remembers laying there, staring at the ceiling, but she doesn’t remember having the initiative to crawl onto the bed. And worse still, she remembers waking up a few hours later, suffocated and torn apart all at once, but she doesn’t remember taking her clothes off.

The night is a blur of small scenes in rapid cessation that her brain doesn’t fully register. She doesn’t know how she gets home, but she remembers being escorted to the front door, and her dad thanking someone as he picks her up (because she’s so unsteady, it feels like she’ll topple over any second), giving her the fuzzy view of a shiny new Camaro peeling out of the driveway before she loses focus again. She doesn’t come to after that until the next day.

The scariest part of the whole thing is the blackouts.

The hardest part is what comes after; when she wakes up in the bedroom at home (this one familiar enough to not give her the weird feeling the last one did), feeling sore and wrung out, like a washcloth that's had too many uses. She's now sober enough to connect the slithers of scenes from memory into a horrifying truth, but too stubborn to not go on pretending it was all a nightmare.

[wnq-writers]

She’s intimidating and brooding And she scares people away, because She’s not made of sugar and spice and everything nice. But rather fire and lightening and everything frightening. People see the smoldering flames And the raging winds And they think that she’s strong. They think that she’s powerful. But really, she just tends to burn herself down.

beautifullytangled (via wnq-writers)

[street-bleach]

[trashcanincarnate-blog]

❝Language, God.❞  Managing by some fluke to sound vaguely serious about it despite the lingering tone of drowsiness.  ❝My own side is the middle, jackass. Unless you’re trying to say I should kick Foof off the bed. ❞  Which - it has to be said - is just about one of the only explanations that carries any weight in Nate’s mind. No one could have the heart to hurt Foof’s feelings (universally accepted as the most loved member of the Douglas family as she is).  ❝That’s real fuckin’ cold, Mattie.❞

[afuckinggremlin-blog]

❝Language, god,❞ She turns to look at him, mocking in deep baritone. But all it takes is the mention of Foof for her argument to lose its validity. The conviction evaporates and is replaced instead by a bittersweet sense of acceptance. ❝... If you weren’t such a yeti, we wouldn’t have this problem.❞ Muttering the words under her breath in a single expulsion of air, even as she scooches closer to the mattress’s edge in a subtle effort to try and give him some more room.

[afuckinggremlin-blog]

❝Motherfu     ❞  The curse is cut off as she reaches back to (not as) gently (as possible) shove the offending arm in the direction of its owner, not even bother to lower her voice to a whisper. ❝Can you please stay on your own side?❞ The only problem with calling dibs on the bed in the spare room; there’s never a time when there isn’t a minimum of one other person taking up space on the mattress. But unfortunately, the same rules apply to the couch. At least by claiming the bed, the chances of getting pushed off, or cuddled mauled are slightly less probable... Or so Mattie thought.

[gaygayleb-blog]

—Christ. A heavy sigh and one last burst of effort before Caleb withdraws. Taking a step back, he knocks her knee with the back of his hand with a soft tap.  ❝Stubborn little shit,❞ he grumbles without any real malice, his expression softening into indifference. He glances around for the flying pan which no doubt now held yet another dent from the scuffle, really just another battle scar from years of abuse. Completely normal wear and tear. Foof, drawn to the kitchen by the shrieking, was sniffing at the edges of the skillet eagerly, tucked as it were beneath the kitchen table. It took some coaxing and tugs to get the silly dog out of the way. But once rescued, Caleb shoves the pan on the counter, clearly abandoning his attempts at any sort of breakfast. ❝Alright. Come outside, Dad wants to clear that other field today.❞

[afuckinggremlin-blog]

Pleas cling to the very tip of her tongue. It takes every drop of willpower in the depths of her reserve to hold out as long as she does. So when he pulls back, a burst of pride spreads through her chest. Thank fucking god. ❝If it makes you feel better,❞ she starts, the words flowing out like air, pressing a hand to her stomach as catches her breath. ❝I've never seen anyone look so badass with glittery angel wings.❞ Popping one last piece of cereal into her mouth, Mattie hops down from the counter, leaving the bowl unmanned. She only took two or three bites from it, but she's lost interest to finish the rest by now. ❝Here, Cay. Eat.❞ She reaches down to scratch Foof behind the ears, absently bending down to plant a kiss on the top of her head and mumble, more so to the dog than to Caleb. ❝We can fly solo for a little bit, right? Yeah. We got this.❞

[serotnin]

[anechooffour]

Emotional Drabble Prompts

((I always see the same like… three prompt lists going around and I wanted to do something different so send me a word and I’ll write a drabble of our muses based on that particular emotion. If you have any details you want included, you’re welcome to add them <3))

1.    Abandoned 2.    Acceptance 3.    Adoration 4.    Afraid 5.    Aggravated 6.    Amazed 7.    Amused 8.    Angry 9.    Anxious 10.  Aroused 11.  Ashamed 12.  Awed 13.  Betrayed 14.  Bitter 15.  Blissful 16.  Bored 17.  Breathless 18.  Cheerful 19.  Comfortable 20.  Concerned 21.  Confident 22.  Confused 23.  Content 24.  Cruel 25.  Crushed 26.  Dejected 27.  Delighted 28.  Delirious 29.  Depressed 30.  Despairing 31.  Determined 32.  Devastated 33.  Disappointed 34.  Disgusted 35.  Distracted 36.  Distressed 37.  Ecstatic 38.  Embarrassed 39.  Enigmatic 40.  Enthusiastic 41.  Envious 42.  Enthusiastic 43.  Exhausted 44.  Fascinated 45.  Frustrated 46.  Furious 47.  Gleeful 48.  Grateful 49.  Greedy 50.  Grieving 51.  Guilty 52.  Heartbroken 53.  Hopeful 54.  Hopeless 55.  Horrified 56.  Hostile 57.  Humiliated 58.  Hurt 59.  Hysterical 60.  Infatuated 61.  Insane 62.  Insecure 63.  Inspired 64.  Intimidated 65.  Jealous 66.  Joyful 67.  Lonely 68.  Lovesick 69.  Loyal 70.  Lustful 71.  Manic 72.  Merciful 73.  Miserable 74.  Mourning 75.  Nervous 76.  Obsessed 77.  Optimistic 78.  Overwhelmed 79.  Pained 80.  Panicky 81.  Passionate 82.  Playful 83.  Pleased 84.  Pleasured 85.  Possessive 86.  Proud 87.  Puzzled 88.  Resigned 89.  Resolved 90.  Sensual 91.  Shocked 92.  Sorry 93.  Sweet 94.  Threatened 95.  Thrilled 96.  Tired 97.  Trusting 98.  Vengeful 99.   Vicious 100. Warm 101. Weary 102. Worried 103. Worthless 104. Yearning

[musedup-blog1]

CHARACTER AESTHETIC;; THE BLACK HOLE

❝You tend to d i s t a n c e yourself from others                                    because y o u feel that they’re going to leave anyway.❞

[fakehauscrew]

[rocketcandycouture]

Headcanon meme~

Put a symbol (or several) in my ask box, and I’ll give you a headcanon for our muses/character(s).  Yes.  Do it.

☾ - sleep headcanon ★ - sad headcanon ☆ - happy headcanon ☠ - angry/violent headcanon ✿ - Sex headcanon ■ -  Bedroom/house/living quarters headcanon ♡ - romantic headcanon ♥ - family headcanon ☮ - friendship headcanon ♦ - quirks/hobbies headcanon ☯ - likes/dislikes headcanon ▼ - childhood headcanon ∇ -. old age/aging headcanon ♒ - cooking/food headcanon ☼ - appearance headcanon ൠ - random headcanon ◉ - Any other question of your choosing

[sapphoria-deactivated20140919]

[fuckyeahswellmusic]

Visit Original Link

Tyler, The Creator - Domo 23

“Sick to my motherfucking tummy Bitch must think I’m a motherfucking dummy Because I dress bummy, bitch think I’m broke Bitch, I ate one roach and I made a lot of money”

[littleredridinggood]

My ideal boyfriend 1. A girl

[johnnyjoestarrelatable]