there will be blood

[uhhgoodd]

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I taste you on my lips and I can’t get rid of you So I say damn your kiss and the awful things you do

[soteroh]

this was one of the few moments that he could get away with what he was about to do next. because, well, hades was injured and weak right now. and sure, alright, under normal circumstances, soter was a good fighter. he was a soldier through and through, but he wasn’t an assassin, and he certainly wasn’t up to hades level. but right now, hades was too weak to put up a front. and that was a point that soter needed to get across. so with one hand, as hades began to stand up, he P U S H E D him back over onto the seat and crossed his arms. “you do realize that i could literally kick your ass right now? like, i’d win a fight against you. that’s how bad you are right now. so guess what? you’re gonna sit down in that chair and fucking rest, because you happen to not have a choice. you can kill me for it when you’re healthy.” soter pointed a warning finger at him, a veiled threat that if hades tried to get up again, he’d push him right back down. it was a miracle, really, that he could get away with this. “are you kidding me, people are making a big deal out of it because it’s a big deal. you think hallucinations are a joke? cartons of ice cream aren’t going to k i l l someone but your dumbass behavior just might. so no, this isn’t dealing with shit. this is you specifically not dealing with shit.” then, pinching the bridge of his nose, he tried his best to keep his burning desire to flood the conversation with his unique sarcasm and instead got serious. “i don’t know exactly how you feel, no. but i do know what it feels like to L O S E someone you love…” he tilted his head. “feels like the end of the fucking world, because it is. it’s the end of your world. and you just want to fucking throttle everyone you come across because, you know, how dare they just act like everyone’s okay when you’re fucking kid is- i mean, like, you get the idea. but here’s the thing, you dipshit. luke isn’t dead. i know it still fucking h u r t s, and it’s okay to be hurt. but you know he’s gonna be alight. he’s a smart kid, and he’s tough, and he’s gonna find a way to make whatever he’s doing work. but right now, you don’t seem like you’re going to be okay. which is a problem because i don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we were A T T A C K E D. and we’re all in danger, and you’re fucking HADES, and we all need you on your ‘a’ game,” soter said, shrugging his shoulders. it was the truth. they all needed hades right now, he was one of the best…they’d all lost. hades had suffered a huge emotional wound, but others had lost their life. “you feel later. right now, you act. you do what you have to do to protect what you fucking stand for. if you feel now, then we all lose.” it was something return had taught him, a long time ago, when he was 18 and fresh faced and knew nothing about pain or hate or betrayal, when he’d suffered his first loss. “pull yourself together, pretend like you aren’t screaming on the inside, and DO YOUR JOB.”

[agenthades]

his initial reaction is surprise -- maybe even SHOCK. he slumped back in his chair, his eyes a little wide, like a deer in the headlights. he knew the man was right, even if he didn’t want to admit it, and he really didn’t feel like putting forth the effort to test the theory. if he was in a healthier condition, he could take soter down in one swift movement, but due to his injuries and all of the other factors, he was slow and WEAK and he absolutely h a t e d it. the feeling of complete helplessness slowly began to set in, and the lump that formed in his throat was definitely a hard pill to swallow. he let out a small laugh, a sign that deflection was sure to follow. ‘ my dumbass behavior has already killed PLENTY. i’ve been a very busy man, these days. ’ he smirked, only for a moment, but his faux sense of composure didn’t last very long. soter had lost more than ANYONE in their lives should ever have to. he balled his hands into fists as the man spoke, and he let out a quiet, frustrated noise. he couldn’t stand how RIGHT he was, how he could so easily pinpoint pretty much exactly how hades was feeling. he nodded slightly, his jaw muscles too tight for him to speak. luke had f u c k e d him up for long enough, too long, and he had to pull himself together. he had to set his priorities straight. this obsession with finding him was keeping him from doing his JOB, keeping him from protecting the ones he cared about -- most importantly, his little sister. he had to screw his head back on right for her. he couldn’t make sure that she was okay if he was too broken, too focused on himself to do so. he had to pick up the pieces, no matter what he had to sacrifice. he was in NO way ready to move on, but he had to set his feelings aside. he had to be the AGENT that the initiative trained him to be, not the broken pieces of a man that luke had turned him into. he had to be S T R O N G, he had to be COLD -- like his father. he’d always known that he would turn out like him, he felt it deep inside of his bones, and now that it was finally happening, he was going to EMBRACE it. he was tired of running from the darkness inside of him. he sighed, his expression hardening as he finally met soter’s eyes. ‘ you’re right. everything you said. i’ve got to get my shit together, i’ve got to protect the people that i’ve got left. okay.... okay. i can DO this. right ?? i can ?? ’ he took a deep breath, nodding to himself. ‘ i can’t be WEAK anymore. it’s not going to help anyone, especially not me. i’m NOT--listen, this doesn’t mean i’m giving up... on him, you know ?? i’m not. i’m just... setting my priorities straight.. yeah. ’

[agenthades]

ashstymestrps:

– you say –                   you hate him but the { w a y } you                                    ᴅᴇᴀʟ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜɪᴍ        –  its so clear – even when you                           { h a t e } him                                               yᴏᴜ ѕᴛɪʟʟ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ʜɪᴍ

[agenthades]

[ x. text | #1 pain in my ass. ]

zeus: alright she's a very important colleague who does many things for us and is a national treasure

zeus: ...and is also our mother

zeus: no don't get her clothes i feel like you've got shit taste

zeus: you are so annoying for fuck's sake

hades: isn't it a little excessive to text everyone at olympus to get her a gift? i don't think she'll be upset if a couple people (me included) don't get her one.

hades: oh please. i have excellent taste.

hades: YOU'RE the annoying one here, not me. you started this. YOU texted ME.

[agenthades]

[ x. text | #1 pain in my ass. ]

zeus: hades she's our Mother what is wrong with you

zeus: thoughtful meaning something she would like and appreciate don't just like give her some cash or an ugly plant or some bullshit

zeus: listen punk just because you like lighting rabbits on fire or some shit doesn't change the fact that i am bigger than you and can kick your ass

hades: she's not our mother, she's our colleague. you're just delusional

hades: what about clothes? or like... a new wardrobe?

hades: i'd rather light YOU on fire. or just about anyone

hades: i'm a trained assassin. try me

[agenthades]

[ x. text | olympus (minus rhea) ]

zeus: rheas birthday is in 2 days

zeus: every single one of you better leave her a great fucking gift like make it thoughtful and shit

zeus: no excuses

zeus: get on that or else she'll be sad and then i will kick every one of ur asses

hades: do I have to?

hades: what exactly qualifies as thoughtful?

hades: I'm not afraid of you

[soteroh]

he focused for a minute on making the sandwich, partly because he took a great deal of pride in the food he made, but also because he was trying to find the right thing to say. so, he pulled out the bread, cleaned off a plate from the sink, and started to layer the meat in. soter had, many times, voiced his opinion on hades’ relationships. he didn’t approve, in the slightest, of sexual relationship between recruits and mentors. but really, it wasn’t his call to make. so though he’d stated his thoughts loudly in the past, he knew now wasn’t the time for that. “he’s not dead, hades,” he said, after a minute, focusing on pulling leaves of lettuce off the head. “so you will see him again. i can pretty much guarantee you’ll see him again. because that punk ass shit has the worst habit of sticking his nose where it no longer belongs.” he pulled a knife out of the drawer and spread some hot mustard on the bread, not even asking if hades wanted it, because he was going to eat it either damn way. “besides, you’re not thinking clearly. you know luke better than pretty much everyone else. you gotta let HIM come to YOU… he’s like those angry, aggressive and abused dogs that just need patience and tlc. sarah mclachlan should do a commercial for him.” he finished the sandwich and then dropped it down on the counter in front of hades, pointing a finger at him after he did. “and you better eat that whole damn thing because i make one hell of a sandwich and if you don’t like it you can kiss me ass, after you eat the sandwich,” he said, wrapping the bread back up and putting everything back in its proper place. “and i get that you want to see him and that he’s important to you and all that shit but you don’t n e e d him, man. you’re your own damn person, you functioned WITHOUT him before, and you can do it again. get a hold of yourself.” had luke been dead, or past a point of return, this conversation may have gone differently. but since soter truly believed that at some point in the near or soon to be near future luke and hades would find some way to reestablish contact, he had a different tone. this wasn’t about comforting his friend after a loss. this was about comforting his friend after a break up. “…you got D U M P E D.” soter said, finally connecting all the lines. because really, beyond all the betrayal and dramatics of their jobs and lives, when you got down to it, luke had broken off contact with hades. “which is weird, since i wouldn’t have called you two a couple to begin with. but it is what it is. he dumped you. and that sucks. but it’s probably not forever. who knows, maybe he’ll call you next week crying about how ICHOR is being mean to him. but right now, you need to pull yourself t o g e t h e r and clean up your act and be strong for yourself.”

[agenthades]

he watched soter assemble the sandwich, staring out, letting his vision focus and refocus over and over again, playing with different focal points. it was something he often did when he was bored. he let his eyes focus in on soter when he spoke, tilting his head up slightly to accommodate. ‘ you sound so sure. why do you sound so sure ?? did YOU see him ?? god damn it, soter, you did, didn’t you ?? well, that’s just great. he’s willing to see pretty much anyone but ME. what a w o n d e r f u l day it is, soter, buddy. ’ he scoffed, tightening his jaw, his eyes like daggers aimed directly at soter. he groaned at the man, running his hand over his face. ‘ i don’t to just sit around and WAIT for him to turn up. i can’t -- he doesn’t even know where this place is. does he ?? no, no -- you wouldn’t be that fucking stupid. my patience is wearing very thin. hell, it was thin to begin with. UGH. what the fuck am i doing ?? it’s like fucking dancing. with a really shitty partner. i HATE dancing. ’ he scowled up at soter as the sandwich was put in front of him, but he picked it up and began eating it anyway. he spent the next few minutes listening to soter while he ate, nodding and rolling his eyes every now and then. he refused to talk with his mouth full -- he may have been a fucking MESS, but at least some fraction of his manners were still in tact. he waved his hand at the other dismissively as he proceeded toward lecture territory, and as he swallowed his last bite of food, he let out a huff. ‘ you don’t get it. NO ONE does, and that’s okay. that’s perfectly fine. i’m fine. i don’t know why everyone’s making such a big deal, really. so my eating and sleeping habits aren’t the most healthy right now -- i’m not going to DIE just because i miss a few meals. so what if i sometimes see things that aren’t really there, probably just a side effect of my sleep deprivation, whatever. you know how those teenage girls in movies always watch movies and eat ice cream straight from the carton after their oh so tragic break ups ?? just... think of all of this as my movie and carton of ice cream. everyone deals with shit in their own way, soter, fucking deal with it or fuck off. or better yet, you can just do BOTH. ’ he snapped, gulping down the rest of his water before getting to his feet. ‘ thanks for the sandwich, the support, the pep talk, all that. ’

[agenthades]

thanatos

–ANONYMOUSLY OR NOT, TELL ME WHO YOU SHIP MY MUSE WITH !

‘ --THANATOS ?? really ?? you do realize i’m--i was screwing his little brother, right ?? is that the appeal ?? got some sort of weird brother kink ?? i mean, don’t get me wrong, than is hot... in a brooding, mysterious kind of way. but he has the emotional capacity of a brick wall--well, unless you’re a DOG. ’ 

[agenthades]

zeus + poseidon

--ANONYMOUSLY OR NOT, TELL ME WHO YOU SHIP MY MUSE WITH !

‘ wait, so like… at the same time ?? like a threesome kind of thing ?? that’s kind of weird. i mean, they’re both very attractive human beings, but they’re like my brothers. and NOT just because of the codenames. like actual, obnoxiously annoying brothers that i never wanted. ’

[agenthades]

demeter

–ANONYMOUSLY OR NOT, TELL ME WHO YOU SHIP MY MUSE WITH !

‘ okay – this is the SECOND time i’ve gotten his name. that’s two times too many. trust me, we aren’t compatible. i don’t think we could even be civil enough for hate sex. i’d just end up choking him to death… if you know what i mean. ’

[agenthades]

Who would you want to be shipped with, if you could choose?

‘ hey, whoa, wait -- that’s not how this game is supposed to work. besides, do you REALLY need to ask that question ?? i mean... isn’t it obvious ?? ’

[rpmemesyo]

Anonymously or not, tell me who you ship my muse with.

[pcieons-blog]

       listening to hades’s insistence that he would still go after luke, NO MATTER WHAT, james couldn’t meet his eyes. it’s hard to imagine life without the olympus initiative, now ( they’ve changed everything, even his name ). his entire life is here, from the friends that he’s made to the profession he’s now dedicated himself to completely. but what was equally as hard to imagine, maybe even h a r d e r, was continuing on without luke. leaving it the way they had after the explosions, even though they’d made some sort of peace, just didn’t seem right. and, yeah, hades wasn’t wrong. james wanted to know WHY. ❝ what, you’re just going to… leave olympus? i don’t get what you think you’re going to a c c o m p l i s h here. he’s not going to come back. maybe, if the shithead cooperates, you’ll get some answers. maybe. but beyond that? what are you gonna do, drag him back here by his hair? ❞ james tied off the last suture on one of hade’s wounds, moving to start on the second, smaller injury. ❝ i don’t want to go on some wild goose chase after someone who made the CHOICE to leave us, hades. it’d be different if he was forced to, but he chose to join ICHOR. ❞ he paused, quieting. ❝ and if we don’t find anything, or maybe we do, i don’t know if i’d be able to handle it. i’d rather spare myself. ❞

[agenthades]

all of hades’ muscles went taut once again, but this time it wasn’t because of the pain. it was the question -- the b u r n i n g question. in the reality of the situation, hades had NO IDEA what he was going to do when he found luke. all he knew for sure was that he was willing to do ANYTHING to get him back in his life, even if it meant leaving olympus. he relaxed his tense muscles, hoping that james would write it off as pain and didn’t ask any questions. he didn’t want to LIE to him, but he didn’t exactly want to tell him the truth either. ‘ i’ll make him cooperate. i’m not going to take NO for an answer. i have to know why he did it, james. there’s more to this than we think. there has to be. ’ he sighed, adjusting himself slightly as james moved to the second injury. he barely noticed the pain now, especially with the distraction of talking about luke. his jaw tightened as james spoke, and before he could finish the sutures, hades grabbed the boy’s hand. ‘ LOOK. i’m not asking you to help me. you don’t have to. i just want you to understand that i can’t just sit around and do n o t h i n g. you can spare yourself all you want, james -- but i’m not. i’m not just going to give up on luke just because things got a little complicated. ’ there was an accusatory bitterness to his tone, but he didn’t mean for it to be there. he felt bad about it as soon as it had left his mouth. he sighed again, letting the boy finish the sutures. ‘ --i’m sorry, i... i didn’t mean... ’

[soteroh]

“anytime, buddy,” soter muttered, pulling the small, standard broom out of the closet and reaching down to grab the dust pan. he quickly started to pull all the glass to one section, doing his best to get the tiny shards. and as he cleaned, tossing the dirty clothing into the hamper in the bathroom, wiping off the spilt liquor on the counter tops, he rolled his eyes. “you say you don’t need a babysitter, yet you’re standing in a room full of broken glass with stab wounds in an apparent hunger strike. so, you know, i beg to differ. you do need a babysitter. next time i’ll have zeus come watch you,” he said, knowing that would annoy hades. “also, i’m just going to throw this shirt out,” he said, lifting up a very blood stained shirt with a look of disgust. with a degree of disdain, he dropped the shirt in the trash, and then started to toss in the empty liquor bottles. “yeah, well, not eating and binge drinking for three days will make you slow. trust me, i know. i’ve been there. well, i mean, i wasn’t out trying to fight the entire city of london with a pocket knife, but still, i’ve been in this general direction.” he slipped the glass from hades hand and refilled it, coaxing him to drink more, because the last thing he needed was a starving, drunk and dehydrated assassin. and then, for a moment, things were blissfully silent as soter went about his cleaning rampage, his OCD not allowing him to focus on anything else until the task at hand was completed. and when he finished, he yanked open the curtains to allow the natural light- or lack thereof- into the room. “how long has it been since you ate?” soter said finally, breaking the silence, refilling hades’ glass again before hobbling his way into the small kitchen again- his leg had started to hurt with the exertion of his ridiculous tidying, but it needed to be done. “what do you want more, sandwich or a tv dinner?” he asked as he looked into the fridge, trying to find anything edible he could put together, and quickly. and then, finally, without looking up from the fridge. “did you think you were going to find him in this state?”

[agenthades]

hades watched the man clean up the mess, a slightly amused look on his face. he knew it was driving soter crazy, and he wasn’t at all surprised that he started cleaning everything up. he groaned dramatically at the mention of zeus, being completely opposed to the idea. ‘ please, anyone but him. honestly, i’d rather have you watch me--not that i need anyone at all. i’m not dead, so there’s that. ’ he shrugged casually, as if death wasn’t really a big deal. he nodded as soter held up the dirty shirt, knowing he’d never be able to get those blood stains out. hey-- maybe that’s what he’d do next--go shopping. just another distraction to keep him from k i l l i n g. soter would probably approve, considering it didn’t involve alcohol or violent activities... but he didn’t bring it up. he probably wouldn’t let him go alone if he knew, so he just kept it to himself, planning to sneak out later in the week to do it. he took the refilled glass back, taking his time to drink it as soter cleaned like a stay at home mom. he had developed a love/hate relationship with long periods of silence. ever since the explosion, his mind had been playing tricks on him. he would see things that weren’t really there, people that couldn’t have possibly been. luke was the one that appeared most often, breaking the silence when he was lonely. it probably had something to do with the sleep deprivation and the lack of nutrients in his system, but he didn’t hate it. he couldn’t. it was luke. it wasn’t real, obviously, but it always felt like it until he disappeared. he could almost hear his voice---he snapped out of his trance when he heard soter’s, his head jerking quickly to look up at him. he had to blink a few times before he came into focus again. ‘ i... haven’t really been keeping track. a few days, at least. i’d rather eat my own arm than a tv dinner, so... the sandwich. ’ he retorted, setting the glass of water down on the nearest table. he froze when he asked THAT, the question taking him completely off guard, and he had to swallow the lump in his throat before he could answer. he tried not to sound upset, but there was nothing he could do to keep the tremble out of his voice. ‘ i... i was trying. i couldn’t stand just sitting back doing nothing. i needed--NEED to see him. i can’t lose him... i won’t. i...i need him. ’

[soteroh]

oh my god, i’ve literally walked into hell, was his first thought. soter kept his own quarters incredibly neat, partly because he’d always been a clean person, but also because over the years he’d developed a somewhat obsessive need for everything to have a place. just the sight of hades room, trashed and littered with broken glass and what he could only assume were bloody cloths, was enough to send him into a minor cardiac infarction. “well, this is totally fucking horrible,” soter said, stepping his way over a broken shard before he smiled tightly at the sight of the agent in front of him. he’d thought the room was a mess. “oh my god, what the hell did you do to yourself. you look like shit. like actual shit. like a pile of shit.” soter rose his eyebrows in pleasant sarcasm before he closed the door behind him and bent down, picking up the larger pieces of glass to toss in the trash. he couldn’t not clean the place up, it was raising his blood pressure just looking at it. but first- “sit down. you smell like liquor and regret. did you stab yourself? oh my god, was no one watching you?” he moved into the small kitchen each room had, filling up a glass of water and handing it to hades. “drink that. and then tell me where the broom is.” he knew exactly what hades’ problem was. but he wasn’t willing to bring it up just yet. these things required a unique finesse…and well, at the moment, he was a little more concerned with the state his fellow agent was in physically. “you think you’re going to get anything done drunk off your ass and wounded?” to anyone outside of the initiative, soter’s harsh words might have come off as insensitive. but the bite in his tone came out of one place and one place only- worry. one look at hades, and he could tell he was in a bad place. anyone could. “i’m serious. drink that water. do you have any food in here? all i see is jack daniels and tequila.”

[agenthades]

soter didn’t have to tell him that his room was a mess and that everything was horrible, he already knew that. he just didn’t care to clean it up. he was usually a very neat person himself, but in light of recent events, he had... other priorities. none of which involved cleaning OR eating. although, the no eating thing was really starting to bite him in the ass, considering he could barely stand without his legs shaking and nearly giving out--just like they were at that moment. ‘ thanks for the vote of confidence, it really means a lot. ’ he rolled his eyes, returning the sarcasm. he took his advice and sank into a chair, but only because he couldn’t bear to stand any longer or else his legs would surely cave on him. ‘ no, i didn’t stab myself. i’m not THAT knife happy. and no, no one was watching me. i don’t need a fucking babysitter, soter. ’ he grumbled, waving his hand dismissively to avoid the story of how he had gotten hurt. he took the glass from him, taking a drink of it before he forced it down his throat himself. ‘ broom ? try the closet over there. ’ he sighed, taking another drink as he prepared himself to be scolded like a CHILD. he knew it was coming the minute he heard soter’s voice at his door. he scoffed. ‘ i’m not always drunk. i was getting plenty done until some guy plunged a knife into my flesh. i was too slow-- ’ he stopped, tightening his jaw as he remembered the violent exchange. he shrugged at the other’s question about food, downing the rest of his glass of water as if it was a fucking shot. ‘ mmm. those are two excellent meals right there. ’

[soteroh]

@agenthades

when he’d gotten out of the infirmary, finally, after what seemed like his entire lifetime, the first thing he’d done was do a head count. he was still unsure of exactly who had made it and who hadn’t, and had no idea what state most people were in. and really, it wasn’t any of his business. but he couldn’t help but feel as though it was his responsibility to make sure people were doing alright. because if he didn’t, who would? and it was with that mentality that, after seeing most everyone else he knew, he found himself in front of hades door. or, well, he could only assume it was hades door. rooms were still being swapped around, but he doubted anyone else would have dared bother the assassin for something as trivial as a better view. in fact, he hadn’t seen hades since he’d been brought in, which to him, meant that the agent was off the deep end, somewhere where he needed to be dragged back to shore. “open the fucking door, or i’ll personally…find someone to kick it down,” soter said gruffly, after his third knock went unanswered. “i know you’re in there! i can smell the scent of violent apathy.” really, he’d only known because the medical staff had told him they’d sent hades back to his room. “hey! you dumb underworld fuck. do i sound like i’m playing around? it’s your parole officer, i’m here to make sure you haven’t slit the throat of a ninety year old arthritic grandmother yet.” 

[agenthades]

hades hadn’t eaten or slept in days. the only substance he’d consumed was alcohol, and he only did that when he was really feeling sorry for himself. when he wasn’t completely obsessing over finding luke. as someone knocked on the door, he lazily looked around the room at the mess he had made of it. shards of broken glass littered the floor, along with a couple piles of blood stained clothes. he let out an exasperated sigh as he heard soter’s voice outside of his door. he was a talker, and hades didn’t really feel much like talking. but he knew all too well that he wasn’t going to leave him alone until he opened that door, so he reluctantly got up, a groan escaping his lips at the pain in his side. being careful to avoid the broken glass, he made it to the door, taking a deep breath before opening it. he looked like complete shit, sporting some gray sweatpants and... well, that was it. james had cut his t-shirt off in the infirmary to get to his wounds, and he hadn’t bothered to throw another one on. he offered soter a small smile, and as fake as it was, it was still something. ‘ no grandmothers... yet. if one of them dares to cross me, though... ’ he smirked and turned on his feet, walking back into his room, leaving the door open so that soter could follow. ‘ oh, and watch out for the broken glass. it’s a real bitch to get out of your foot. ’ 

[pcieons-blog]

       again, james had to set down the sutures and the curved needle in his hand. how the fuck was he supposed to be a medical professional when he was too emotionally invested to keep his hands steady? and hades – H A D E S. james had never heard so much as a waver in the man’s voice; he was calm, deadly, intelligent, powerful ( most likely some combination of the previous ) but he never sounded like this. broken, and tired, and in pain. james’s heart ached. ❝ he W A R N E D me. ❞ turning back around to meet hades’s insistent stare, james’s hands curled into fists against the counter behind him. ❝ he knew this was coming – of course, obviously he did, but he was telling me not to worry about him if he ever… disappeared. if ‘things got bad’. hades, he told me not to go after him. not to w o r r y. which is fucking stupid, because all that did was make me worry more. ❞ james moved forward, finally confident in his ability to stitch hades’s wounds, even despite the topic of conversation. ❝ he served with my brother, did you know that? in the army. he was there when matty d i e d. ❞ he picked up a rhythm, calmly tying off the individual sutures and repeating the motions almost mechanically. ❝ how can someone COMPLETELY turn on the ideals they were ready to give their LIFE for? ❞ james’s world was very black and white: he believed in things like do no harm. forgive, but don’t forget. live while you can. traitors that appeared repentant, but only to an extent? well, it was hard to find a place for them when the gray area in his vision was so very small. ❝ i just don’t u n d e r s t a n d. ❞

[agenthades]

slightly trembling fingers combed through his messy hair, and he let out a heavy sigh as james began to speak. he rolled his eyes and scoffed once again, shaking his head in disbelief. ‘ of course he did. he didn’t tell me that, though, did he ? so i am going to worry, i am going to go after him. even if he had told me not to... i would. but you already know that. ’ his eyes remained focused on james’ face as he began stitching up the wounds. it was easier to ignore the pain that way. he shook his head slowly when james asked if he knew about his brother, teeth digging into his lower lip. he couldn’t even IMAGINE losing his sister. ‘ let’s face it, olympus was never luke’s favorite. i’m not entirely surprised he was on the other side. what surprises me is that he could put all of his loved ones at risk. his brother was the whole reason behind all of his resentment, because he feels like the initiative took him away from him, and he basically put a target right on his back. that’s what i don’t understand. i know he cares about me, about you. so why would he still do something like THIS ? it just doesn’t make sense. which is why i need to find him, james. don’t you want answers ? ’ of course, that wasn’t the only reason hades wanted to find his old recruit. he’d been an absolute WRECK without him, and he yearned to be close to him again. luke CLEARLY didn’t want to be found, but hades knew that it was only because he was trying to push everyone away. it was easier that way. he knew that game far too well not to recognize it. ‘ l i s t e n. luke isn’t someone you can just... let go. i can’t just give up on him. i know that’s probably what he wants, but he only wants it because he thinks that’s what he deserves. and it’s NOT. that’s why i can’t fucking do it. and neither can you. i won’t let you. ’