the only exception

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

Charles parted his lips to argue that he wasn’t, in fact, jealous — but he figured that would be a waste of breath. He honestly hadn’t realized he would have been the jealous type, though. Maybe it was only something about Isis specifically that brought it out of him. The ends of his mouth uplifted into a small smile when she made her way closer to him, one of his hands inching towards the edge of the bed to grab onto hers before realizing even if they had cleared away most of the tension, that was probably still out of line. “I’m sorry,” he thought to say. “It probably would have saved us a hell of a lot of trouble if I would have just asked you about it that first day, instead of assuming Katherine and all those other gossip-obsessed people were right.” With some sudden surge of courage, Charles was scooting more towards the opposite side of the bed and turning his head to look at her before he patted his hand to the now empty spot beside him a couple times in suggestion. 

[ahgchisis]

She slipped in to bed next to him with very little hesitation, and it was actually really easy to fall in to the little relaxing lull she was already finding herself in. And it was thanks to Charles. Isis could tell that he was always going to be the one to change her mood - or fix it in some cases. Did he have his finger on a button on her body that was controlling all of her emotions and every little thing she said - guiding her to say whatever she was thinking? While she wasn't sure about how exactly he was doing it, it was obvious he still had all that control over her. "It's okay," she said after realizing she hadn't answered him, and yet her head was resting comfortably on his shoulder. "I'm sorry for thinking you could be part of a bet like that."

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

"It made sense at the time," Charles argued weakly. Thinking about it now, Isis didn’t seem the type to go behind someone’s back like that — but he was heartbroken with the initial news of it. He didn’t know what he was thinking."I mean, you two are always around each other and he’s always touching you or, like, talking to you all close and — I mean, seriously, does he not know how to speak at a normal volume, or is it just a thing between the two of you that you always have to be whispering?” He shook his head, clearly getting ahead of himself. Charles tried to move to sit up more in bed, but gave up after a couple seconds of trying got him feeling more exhausted than he already was. Instead, he started fiddling with the edge of his blanket so that he wouldn’t have to stare longingly at her. Charles had made himself look pathetic enough as it was. “It just made sense that it was true. Which is stupid, I know that now, just like it was stupid of you to think that I would take up some bet to intentionally hurt you.”

[ahgchisis]

For once in all of this conversation, she could honestly laugh. Not some angry or clipped chuckle, but a real giggle that made her face scrunch up and crinkles appear around her eyes. He was jealous, and this was the first time she had been so puppy-love-sick since that day when Isis had thought her world was crashing down after only being up for only a few hours more than 24. "I like the jealous side of you - like this." Slowly, but surely, she could take more and more steps closer to him, sitting on the edge of the bed so that  Charles wouldn't be completely disturbed. "But, back on topic - Jaxon just likes everything personal. He's not a fan of the world knowing that I'm really emotionally unstable at times." The words rolled off her tongue, proving that if she was around Charles long enough, Isis would be able to say about anything because her walls her down.

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

Charles was dumbfounded. Did she honestly think he would do something like that? Had he not made it obvious to her from the start of their partnership all the way up to that kiss that he liked her? Jesus, their communication was phenomenal. Charles opened his eyes again to see her heading for the door and blurted out the first thing he could think of. “I kissed you because I liked you,” he confessed. “Well, like, I guess. I don’t really know anymore. My head’s been all over the place for the past two weeks.” Charles gave up on trying to find something decent to watch. He tried his best to keep his offense out of his tone of voice, but Charles had always thought that Isis knew him better than most, despite the short amount of time they’d actually been talking. “Give me some credit, Isis. I may have some bad days, but I’m not that much of a dickhead. I would never be a part of something like that.” Minimally shaking his head, Charles shifted a little in bed to lay more comfortably. Fuck doctor’s recommendations, he needed a good sleep after this conversation. Heaving out a sigh, Charles murmured, “I would have hoped that you would have know that.”

[ahgchisis]

Only his first set of words stopped her. That didn't mean she would turn around to look at him. "And do I really look or seem like the girl who would make out with someone else if I already had a boyfriend?" Isis always did this, she made sure that she wasn't the only one getting blamed for something. The feeling of getting attacked had always been one of her least favorites, and this was almost no different. The last 15 days had been a pattern - day in and day out - of nothing but pain and stares, and whispers around her. "Like God, Charles. Don't you see just how head over heels I am for you?" As soon as the words came out, it was impossible to take them back. Her hand went to cup over her mouth as a way to make sure nothing else would come out too. That was stupid and probably going to ruin her later. But not if the silence didn't do it first.

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

Charles was going to open his mouth to say that he was fine and he definitely didn’t need any of her pity to help get him back up on his feet — he would have enough to deal with his parents coddling him for the duration of the season. But that thought was quickly shot down when she carried on speaking and Charles’ eyebrows pulled together in confusion. “You need to stop,” he began, turning his head to look directly at her. “I have no idea what bet or money you keep going on about and that’s not just because I’ve just suffered from a concussion. Do you want to elaborate on what exactly you’re referring to? Or are you going to keep me in the dark about it forever?” It took everything in him not to outwardly beam at the allusion that she both cared for him and possibly could have a crush on him. That only lasted for a second or two though, because Charles was sure she was still with Jaxon anyhow. Speaking of which, he followed up his other question by asking, “Shouldn’t you go head back to Jaxon, or something?”

[ahgchisis]

"Are you kidding me?" Isis managed to ask, taking a step back and going for her things again. "It's like you're trying to find everything that has made my last two weeks a living hell and shove it all right back in my face." She looked at the chair for her bag and then realized she had only brought her phone - which was sitting in her pocket. Isis turned back around, glaring at him with narrowed eyes. "But let's keep playing this game you seem to enjoy so much That bet - the one that your football teammates seemed to put on just to see if you could get the most gullible and naive girl in our senior class to kiss you...which I guess was me? And because everyone seems to think I'm in a relationship with Jaxon, which I never have been or will be, I want to bet myself that you lost a little money didn't you? Playing dumb doesn't work on me anymore." Staying around was going to be pointless, so heading for the door seemed like the most reasonable option. 

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

Charles grumbled a little when he felt his shoulders shake and only bothered to try to open up his eyes when he realized the movement wasn’t going to stop after hearing the person’s spoken words. “I’m just napping,” he sleepily grumbled, not yet registering whose voice it was until he had his eyes fully opened and he blinked a couple times — just as safe measure. Charles wouldn’t have put it past himself or the concussion to hallucinate that it was Isis standing above him. His expression was fond with that idea for a split second, then Charles was hit with everything that happened between them and immediately swatted her hands away. “I’m fine,” Charles muttered, turning his attention to the television and flicking through another couple channels before averting his eyes back to her. For the sake of himself, Charles did his best to keep his tone from growing too solemn before he was asking, “What are you doing here, Isis?”

[ahgchisis]

What was she doing here? Isis bit down on her lip to avoid answering the question for a few seconds, but sooner or later she would need to answer. "The truth? I've been worried about you since I saw you on the ground at the game." Wow, as if that couldn't be any more desperate and clingy. "Despite that shitty bet, I'm still worried and my heart is beating and I know I'm just some foolish girl..." A shake of her head sufficed for something to cut her off, because she didn't want to look at him again. In fear that there might be some smirk or excited smile that had been caused by the acknowledgment of the bet and her naivety. But maybe Isis needed to keep going so she would be able to walk out with her head held high. "But that won't stop me from checking on you. It probably looks so childish and crush-isn, but..yeah."

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

Charles would never admit how terrified he was beyond the brave face he put on. The pain was like nothing he’d felt before and there was that ever constant worry that he had royally fucked up and would end up paralyzed, which would make going into the NFL nothing more than a fantasy and make it impossible for him to give back to his parents for everything they’d done for him. It was stupid, but he had almost wished that he was knocked out cold so that he wouldn’t have to hear the buzz of the nurses and doctor talking above him, nor have to witness the scenery of the hospital. But as soon as the word ‘concussion’ left the doctor’s mouth, Charles’ worries were reduced to a minimum and he could exhale the breath that he hadn’t realized he had been holding in. After convincing his parents to head home for the night because it wouldn’t help any if they were sleep deprived, Charles settled more comfortably in the hospital bed. He thought it was a little extreme, having to keep him over night for observations, but he made no real fuss about it. After being advised against sleeping, Charles busied himself with flicking through the television channels an attempt to find something decent to watch for the rest of the night. But halfway through, Charles’ eyelids grew heavy and it was too much of a chore to keep them open.

[ahgchisis]

The waiting room had been crowded and cramped with close to half of the football team there and the cheerleaders waiting outside. But all of it was for nothing when Charles' doctor came in and told them they could all go home. Maybe Isis would have followed those directions had it not been for her absolute need to see him and make sure that he was alright. When everyone had cleared out, she sneaked down the hall she could see on the doctor's clipboard, peaking through the glass window of each door until she found the man she was looking for. And her heart dropped even more when she realized he was asleep. They had been told he just had a concussion, but if she remembered anything - it was that you weren't supposed to sleep the first 24 hours. So, Isis slipped in and ran over to his bed, shaking him quickly and quietly until he would wake up. "Charles, please don't slip in to a coma or anything." She wasn't really sure of what she was saying, but it was almost gibberish falling out of her mouth.

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

It was wrong, he knew, but Charles was sorely hoping that Isis wasn’t going to be at the same. At the very least, that she was going to leave after he initially looked over at her. But seeing her still sat in that same spot only made everything infinitely worse for him, mentally. All he could think about was what she had said the other day. He swallowed back at the lump in his throat and forced himself to gather the rest of the offensive line into a huddle. He just needed to get through the last seven minutes of this game and it would be fine. At least for the time being, because they were ahead by ten points and after a win, there was always a huge party over at Marco’s and Charles was planning on getting drunk enough so he wouldn’t have to remember his own name, let alone the fact that he’d let some girl who was only meant to be a project partner ruin his peace of mind. Charles called out the play and took a couple steps back, eying his receivers on both the left and right sides of the field. It took every ounce of concentration he had in him to ignore the worries bouncing around in his head and the cheers of the fans in the stands and Charles was so concerned with keeping his head silent that he hadn’t noticed anyone coming his way until he was hitting the ground and everything from his neck up exploded in an unbearable pain.

[ahgchisis]

When everyone in the crowd let in a collective gasp, Isis got herself to look up. She didn't really understand until after she had looked for Charles number and found him no where to be found - and then noticing the man on the ground. "Isis," Jaxon managed to get her attention, but only for a second before she was running out and down the stairs of the gate, out to the track that would cross to the field. It was instinctive, because even after everything Charles had done to her, she still cared too much about him. Isis' body was held back as soon as her right foot hit the grass because of two football players. There lips were moving but the only thing she could hear was a soft ringing in her ears. "Please," Isis begged. "I need to see him." Her hands reached out in front of her as though that would help, but the only thing it did was make her look like more of an idiot. Once there was a stretcher closer to Charles, the football players who had been holding her back brought her to the cheerleaders and kept her there.

One of them managed to tell her, "He's going to St. Mary's - if you want to see him, you might want to go." 

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

Charles was going to ask her what she meant with the money comment, but she was already out of reach by the time his head had registered it — and there was no way he was going to give her what little pride he had left she hadn’t already stolen. “Fuck you too,” he grumbled under a breath before he was making his way in the opposite direction towards his car. Charles wanted to believe that now that he had confronted her, everything was going to be fine and he would be able to get back into his normal mindset with the game tomorrow. However, sitting in the driver’s seat of his car for ten minutes quickly proved otherwise. His heart felt like it was beating a million times a minute and his entire body felt alight with the anger and self-loathing that was brewing in the pit of his stomach. Charles scrubbed his hands furiously down the length of his face again. If anything, confronting Isis only made everything in his head bounce more frequently and Charles couldn’t get himself to concentrate on his pre-calculus homework by the time he got back home, let alone the idea of making it through a whole four quarters of a game.

[ahgchisis]

She didn't go to school the next day. Not even after Jaxon and Lauren had both tried to pull her out of bed did she care about getting ready and forcing herself through three hours of having to sit around Charles. He was a complete jerk and she was a fool, someone who thought that there was actually a spark between them. Isis did however end up going to the football game at the request of her parents because she needed a little fresh air for the night. And that was how she ended up sitting on the bleacher up front while everyone else stood and cheered. The rumor had gotten worse and the truth kept getting easier and easier to take - that all the key players on the football team had put Charles up to playing with her emotions until she kissed him. He had been paid to kiss her, and if that wasn't a blow to her confidence - she didn't know what was. Isis had learned Charles number at the first game she went to, so she found him easy enough, but at the slightest inkling of him looking over, she threw her sweater tighter around her body and hid her face away.

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

Charles was mulling over a whole speech in his head the whole walk towards Isis, but he should have known that it would have been just his luck that every word he had mentally reiterated immediately disappeared the second he stopped in front of her. It was like all the stress and heartache he’d been dealing with the past two weeks had amplified and Charles had to take in a deep breath before he could utter any words. “You could have told me,” he started off plainly. “Should have, I mean,” he amended himself immediately after. “It would have been just a little bit better hearing it come out of your mouth instead of right before class from a whole squad of cheerleaders. I wouldn’t have gone through with kissing you, so maybe that’s why you didn’t.” His voice had suddenly turned somber as he carried on speaking, and Charles had no intention of changing that. Isis should be aware of the pain she’s caused him with such a stupid mistake. And maybe it’d also be enough of a wake up call for himself to get himself in order so he can start performing decently on the field again. “— but maybe as some advice for the future, you should at least have the decency to break up with Jaxon before you go off kissing other guys.” 

[ahgchisis]

It took everything in Isis not to take the book she had been holding and to use it to smack him across the face. "Are you kidding me?" She scoffed, snapping the book shut and standing up to grab her things. Fuck the rain, she didn't care. At first, the only thing she did care about was his voice and how horrible he sounded, but now that he was putting all of this on her, and outwardly giving off the idea that her and Jaxon were dating just seemed to make it worse. He thought it was hard just getting kissed by someone who he thought was taken,  and he would never understand the pain she felt when she realized she was just the center of a bet, and a petty one at that. "Oh, I'm so sorry you probably lost a little money, but get over yourself Charles." Towards the end, she could feel herself slipping in to something more emotional and it was getting hard to hold herself together. Throwing her bag over her shoulder, Isis gave him one last look and another scoff before heading right out in to the rain. "Fuck you."

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

Two weeks later, and nothing had gotten better. In fact, it had only gotten worse. It was like every time Charles so much as stepped in a direction at school, Isis and Jaxon were an arm’s length away — and there was always a hand at the small of her back or an arm draped over her shoulders or a kiss to her cheek or some mumbled words that Charles could only assume were some ooey-gooey love bullshit stolen from one of those romance movies people always cry to. It was disgusting — no, it was heartbreaking. And that’s what was worse, honestly, because if it was disgusting then Charles would be able to hate it and that would make it easy for him to walk around school with his head held high. But he couldn’t hate her for being happy. He just had to deal with the tug and pull of every jealous bone in his body every time he saw them together — which, apparently the universe was very keen on making as often as humanly possible. If it were any other circumstance, Charles would have laughed at the thought of ever being jealous of Jaxon Olsen.

Tugging his backpack more securely over his shoulder, Charles had his eyes set on the ground as he made his way out of the side door of the gym and towards his car. Practice had been killer — and although that was usually the case, this week felt worse by at least ten fold because of their upcoming game against Easton. It didn’t help any that Charles still had half of his head wrapped around Isis. And as if on cue, he spotted a familiar silhouette as he made his way towards the parking lot. Under a sudden wave of courage, Charles abruptly changed his walking course from his car and towards Isis instead.

[ahgchisis]

Rumor had gotten around quickly, and thanks to that, isis knew the truth. Charles lay was nothing more than another upcoming frat boy-football player, who only cared about himself and the fun he could have. To think otherwise was a complete and idiotic move that she couldn't believe she had done. Of course he was just using her for the class, and beyond that, for some money because she was so playable and insecure. Charles Lay had managed to go right past that and ripped her heart out with one try. So the last two weeks had been full of staring and Jaxon trying to console her as much as possible.  And he wasn't with her now thanks to some glass blowing class his dad had signed him up for. She had stayed to work on the project - that she was now sole putting on her shoulders - and ended up by the parking lot while waiting for the rain to quit. Only then would she run to her car. But maybe she should do it now because Charles was coming over. Isis ducked her dead down further in to her book, not bothering to look up when she knew he had stopped.

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

As soon as she finished speaking, Charles was dropping his pen against his notebook and pushing himself into a stand. He only left enough room for him to sling his backpack over his left shoulder and give some half-assed excuse about feeling ill to their teacher before he was heading out of the room. Charles uncharacteristically shied away from a couple people who had been lingering around the hallways, ducking into the nurse’s office as subtly as he could manage. “Yeah, just —" he swallowed thickly then plopped onto one of the beds. "I’m sure it’s nothing." And nothing was right. He and Isis were nothing. This whole thing was nothing. Why Charles was letting this all get into his head was beyond him, but every time he looked at her all he could do was wince at the sudden pinch of stupidity — and he still had two classes with her to get through. Charles scrubbed his hands furiously over his face and exhaled a sharp sigh. This was going to be a long day.

[ahgchisis]

The door shutting - slightly louder than expected, making her flinch - managed to silence the entire room. And if everyone hadn't been looking at her before, they were now. Isis swallowed the dry spot in her throat before completely ducking her head and shoulders so she could sink in to the wall. What had she done wrong? The rest of the hour, she kept herself down so that nobody could see how tears were dropping on to the sheet of paper below her. And the bell ringing was the only thing that got her up and going - faster than she ever had before. She almost ran to find Jaxon at his door, who instantly went to help wipe away any stray tears. "You heard about the bet?" He managed to whisper to her, guiding them down to a side hallway no one was in. It wasn't going to help though, because as soon as Jaxon explained the whole thing to her, she was too much of a mess for someone not to notice. How had the past few days managed to turn on it's head so much?

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

Just the sound of her voice made his heart twist even more. How in the hell did Charles let himself get this enveloped in someone so quickly? He’d spent most of his high school years steering clear of girls and relationships for this point exactly — he knew he wouldn’t be able to handle the fall out. Maybe it was also because Isis had seemed so genuine first off, but it was becoming evident to him that Charles was horrible at reading people. “No,” he answered shortly, carrying on with the absentminded scribbles in his notebook. He could feel a couple stares boring into him from across the room and it only made Charles shuffle awkwardly in his seat. He was glad for the moral support of his teammates, but at the same time — this wasn’t something he wanted put on blast for the whole school to know. As if he really had any control of that. And as if they all weren’t already aware. He rolled his eyes at the thought. Whatever. He was probably over due for some bad limelight after all the good he’s gotten with the season the football team’s been having thus far. 

[ahgchisis]

Between the stares from everyone in the room and the clipped answer that Charles rattled off, that tingly feeling that had going through her lips had so suddenly stopped. "Oh," Isis didn't even bother to hide the hurt in her voice as she turned back to her things and tried to focus on the blank paper in front of her. What had she done so horribly to make this happen? Had Isis been too excite to see him - or was it her entire happy attitude in general - did this even mean anything to him? Because it meant almost everything to her, and the fact he was brushing her off formed a lump in her throat that made her keep her head down with the threat of crying looming. "Yeah, okay." Isis added so there wouldn't be so much silence between them. She could feel herself shrinking back in to that hole she had made for herself, and the stares weren't helping. 

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

[ughchisis]

He didn’t bother looking up to any of the pattering footsteps that entered the classroom, and especially hadn’t when one of his teammates sat beside him muttered something under their breath. Charles could hold his own, and he didn’t need anyone else bad-mouthing Isis for his sake. He did have to hope that they wouldn’t need to work on their projects, though — but of course as soon as that thought passed through his mind, they were being told to do exactly that. Begrudgingly, Charles picked up his backpack and forced himself to sit at the desk next to Isis. As soon as he was settled, he was back to writing in his notebook. At this point, the words didn’t even make any sense and it was really only something to keep himself distracted from looking at her. Charles would be damned if he had to stare at some smile on her face that was caused by Jaxon instead of himself. His lips pulled into a subtle scowl at the thought. Charles had never been one to hate people, especially not fellow peers that he honestly hardly knew anything about — but he was sure in this moment, he was right on the cusp of hating Isis. 

[ahgchisis]

Her stomach sank in to her chest when he came over. The anxiety of knowing he was this close to her was like some kind of drug. She was positively radiating when Charles was around - let alone right next to her. But something felt wrong, because he hadn't looked at her once in the entire 15 minutes since the bell had rung. And people were looking at them from everywhere around the room, which made her feel a little out of the ordinary. But maybe Charles and gone and gushed about her or something cute and dream-like such as that. "Charles," she asked airily - ducking her head down to get a better look at him. Isis couldn't figure if she should focus on the project or if they should get right down to it. But then she settled on something in the middle. "Did you work on the project any more after Saturday night, when I left?"

[ughchisis]

i thought i would be happy ➳ friday night lights

Charles felt stupid. Point blank. What made it worse was that he knew he had no basis for it. She had a boyfriend, whatever — they only made out for a little while the other day after a couple hours of working on their project. It was horribly cliché, looking back on it now, but that didn’t make anything less nauseating from Charles’ point of view. Although it wasn’t as if she held any sort of obligation towards him. Sure, Charles would have rather been informed beforehand — instead of after the fact, and by a bout of cheerleaders nevertheless — of her less than ideal relationship status, because then he probably wouldn’t have been so easily endeared by everything Isis did nor would he have followed through with the initial kiss. The way his insides were starting to uncomfortably knot and how quick he was to duck away from wherever he spotted her within the first fifteen minutes of the start of the school day was probably more on the childish side, but Charles was able to justify it in the back of his mind regardless. He plopped into his seat at the front of the classroom, bowing his head and busying himself with scribbling in his notebook so just maybe that would give everyone — Isis, more specifically — enough of a clue that he didn’t want to be bothered. 

[ahgchisis]

There had never been a feeling when she was on the clouds more than before. For once, Monday didn't feel like a death sentence or something she wanted to sleep through entirely. And that was mainly because the person she had been pining for had finally kissed her, and it wasn't just a dream. The smile on Isis' face gave away just how accomplished she felt, and Jaxon saw it as he handed her some homework sheets she needed to copy before 5th hour. She waved goodbye to him from down the hall before quickly stepping in to her first hour and spotting the sole person who had managed to turn her weekend on it's head. Isis hadn't stopped thinking about Charles all of Saturday night and Sunday. Her lips still felt like they were tingling - even now. She could see him wiring down the notes on the board, and she knew she needed to get those down. Besides, she would be able to see him when they started on their projects at the beginning of the hour anyways. Butterflies were flying everywhere in her stomach just thinking about it. 

[potpourrielle-blog]

Visit Original Link

I was scared, I was scared. Tired and under-prepared.

But I'll wait for it.

If you go, if you go, leave me down here on my own.

Then I'll wait for you, yeah.

[ahgchisis]

"I can't believe you let me down; but the proof's in the way it hurts..."

[inccarcerous]