Gib me all you got @ahgibbeh - Tumblr Blog

official-lucifers-child

every time i think, i take 10 damage

fandomchaosposts

and everytime we kiss I swear I could fly

turing-tested

you come to my house. you see this.

“oh? you have kids?” “No” i reply. “…rabbits?” “No,” again I reply. you look closer. inside is a roomba. ‘its almost time to feed him!’ i say. your eyes ask a handful of questions, but you remain silent. i sprinkle a handful of dirt in the enclosure.

butchbellaswan

dark hozier take me to hell

chlobat

Chaotic neutral hozier take me to lunch

xjustpaul

gentlesharks

teacher: how are you doing? me: *thinking about how sharks have survived 5 major extinctions that wiped out majority of life on earth* me: yeah

sneeking

they found LIVING sharks in an active underwater volcano recently i’m shaken

devinwolfi

there is no god only shark

pureyiff-deactivated20171213

pasdecoeur

hot take, and please understand that i love and respect him so much, but those suits john mulaney wears do so much of the comedic weight-lifting for him, it is un-believable.

i mean, here comes in this sweet-lookin white boy, in his tight little suit, all starched collar and neatly steam-pressed lapels, with a face like every high school valedictorian your mom wanted you to date, and he smiles and looks you dead in the eye, and says, “eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs.”

of course the crowd loses its goddamn mind. what a fucking icon.

grungekitty-77

I think you’re really underselling the voice.

His voice matches that look to a tee. You hear that voice come out of that man and you think “That sounds correct. That voice fits my image of this man” That mental image being the weird kid in school whose parents didn’t let him go on field trips, your coworker that collects model trains, or that boring friend of your parents you never bothered to talk to.

So even if you don’t even see him, like my brother and I did when we first heard his stuff, listening to the audio, it STILL gets you like a gut punch to hear him say “FUCK DA POLICE!!”

Basically nothing about this man can warn or prepare you.

axmxz

what i find most striking is how many folks don’t realize that all this - the suit, the high-pitched whiny voice, the long awkward coltish strides he makes on stage, the nebbishy deference to everyone under the sun - is a persona john mulaney the comedian invented to do his killer stand up to its best effect.

elasticitymudflap

technicolorheart9801

What does this say I blacked out and smashed reblog

millennial-review-deactivated20

homofied

I identify as a man but the sheer audacity of the third option’s energy is making me question if I made the right decision

danhumphrey

scott lang, completely misunderstanding peter parker’s power: hey if u want man we could get tiny and just like hang out, i don’t know if you’ve ever been in a lego castle but it’s pretty sweet

peter parker: u have no idea how much physical pain having to turn this offer down is causing me but,

northstarthembo

Scott Lang, upon realizing Peter Parker can’t shrink: oh okay no biggee, we’ll just make the LEGO castle big

brainstatic

Everyone’s like “those Germans have a word for everything” but English has a word for tricking someone into watching the music video for Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up.

queenrinacat

English has a lot more words created for very specific phenomena! It’s not just rick-rolling. Language is always evolving and it’s super interesting! Here’s a list of hyper-specific/untranslatable words in English.

edweeirdo

Some of these are fucking wild.

milkywhoreos

Can someone please tell me what it means when an owl LITERALLY fucking swims towards you and then stares you down??

Like look at it?? Literally flew past me and my my friend, it was so close that the wings touched our faces.

shiraglassman

It’s reminding you to do your Duolingo practice

demonladytakkuri

The real answer is that it really wants you to go away

That’s a fledgling great horned owl, they’re known for being generally ballsy and aggressive, and owls have been known to both climb trees and swim through still water in a pinch

Most likely full scenario: the bird was practicing flying, but it fell because it’s still a kid and they do that. It probably fell in/by the water. It then was like Oh Damn Oh Jesus and decided it was not in fact a duck and headed to shore, saw you, and was utterly offended but confused on what to do. So it decided to Square Up and face you like the hellbeast it is.

The pose it’s taking in the pic is one I affectionately call Full Orb. A fully orbed owl is 100% READY to FIGHT 1v1 no items final destination. You were probably its first up close encounter with a human, and since birds tend to associate larger animals with predators, it tried to make itself look as big as possible to make sure you know what’s up. It was staring you down because it was waiting to see you make the first move in the dual or flee in fear from its superior owl might.