Aiden Cassidy

17 - Gryffindor - Muggleborn - Chaser - Captain

[aidencassidy-blog]

“How often do we have to go through this huh?”

[bassaniboy-blog]

Declan sighed as Aiden leaned in to kiss him, but Aiden was pulling away too soon, and Declan was left to think about what the hell he’d just done. He’d kissed Aiden in public, and Aiden was asking him why, and honestly, he didn’t know. Maybe it was the fact that he’d just told Aiden something he told so few people. Maybe it was his constant clashes with Charle. Or maybe he was just feeling a little bit crazy today. But instead of saying all that, he just shrugged. “I dunno. Just wanted to.” He opened the door to The Three Broomsticks, his back still pressed to it, his body lingering close to Aiden’s.

“Come on, forget it,” he said as he led Aiden inside. “You… What do you want to drink? I mean… I’m paying, but I can’t really, er, order, if you’re having booze.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

Aiden gave Declan a small smile. He really wasn’t sure what had gotten into him. Just before at the castle he had been against even a date. Now here he was kissing him like this. It was a change Aiden wasn’t complaining about but an odd one. “Well, I like it,” he replied with a warm smile.

“RIght, well I’ll order then,” he said with a chuckle. “Ugh, probably a firewhiskey though. That’s the best,” Aiden flashed Declan a grin. “And I got it, so don’t worry about it okay? What do you want?” Aiden had enough money for some drinks at least. Besides he wanted to treat Declan tonight.

[bassaniboy-blog]

Declan’s heart was pounding the whole way to Hogsmeade, and his pace alternated between slow, stiff steps and leaping bounds. Was this a date? How were things with Aiden going to change? Would they change at all? Did he want them to? He tried to shrug it off. It was just a drink; there was no need to read anything more into it. The tendency to overthink things was usually what got him into trouble in the first place.

When they reached the door, Declan suddenly found himself shaking as he reached for the doorknob, and he didn’t know why. What was there to be nervous about? There was only Aiden right behind him, wanting to date him, wanting to call this a date. But Declan couldn’t make this a date. Not in public. So why was he turning towards Aiden, right in the middle of the street where anyone could see, and looping his arms around Aiden’s neck? Why was he saying, “Kiss me,” and leaning forward to let Aiden do just that?

[aidencassidy-blog]

The walk to Hogsmeade was relatively quiet. Declan wasn’t talking, and Aiden didn’t really want to spook him or make him more nervous than he probably already was. They’d hung out in public a few times before, but nothing like this. This was, at least in Aiden’s mind, a proper date. Sure it was spontaneous, and not really what he had been planning, but it was one. Aiden didn’t want to scare Declan off.

Aiden was about to say something when they arrived and he noticed Declan’s hand trembling. Before he could though, Delcan had spun around and wrapped around him, leaning in. “Hey,” he mumbled softly, eyes going a bit wide at the suddenness of Declan’s actions. “What’s all this about,” he continued, letting his arms find their way around Declan’s waist. But he leaned in, kissing him softly but quickly before pulling away.

[bassaniboy-blog]

Declan smiled. “Are you just saying yeah because I’m kissing you?” he asked. “Because if so, I’ve got enough leverage to last until practically forever, which probably isn’t good news for you.” He sighed, putting on that face he insisted wasn’t a pout. “Don’t push your luck,” he said. “I don’t do that romance novel dating bullshit. But it’s not our usual whatever, I guess I can give you that.” He pulled his hand away from Aiden’s, just in case someone saw, and started down the hall. “You coming?”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“No, I’m not saying it just because of that,” he rolled his eyes. But he did like kissing Declan, and it was very hard to say no to him like that. “Hey, c’mon. You can’t blame a guy for trying can you?” he asked, giving Declan’s hand a squeeze before he pulled away. “I’m coming, I’m coming,” Aiden laughed softly, hurrying after Declan.

[tartan-prince-blog]

“Come on, I was practically raised on a broom!”  Yuri couldn’t help an indignant little stamp of his foot as he protested this complete injustice.  “I’m not gonna get hurt.  If I do, it’s my own fault.  Nobody’s out here when I practice.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“That’s even worse!” Aiden groaned. “You should have someone else out on the pitch with you, it’s not safe to be out there alone,” granted, he was always out there alone too. But that was different, he was much older and more practiced on a broom.

[bassaniboy-blog]

“He’s got the Ministry wrapped around his finger,” Declan said. “Besides, the Ministry doesn’t particularly give a shit about tough home lives. Didn’t you hear what everyone says about Harry Potter? They say his muggle family was absolute shit to him, and nobody did anything about it.” Declan knew Aiden was still torn, so he leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss to Aiden’s lips. “I… Honestly, I hadn’t thought I would get this far,” he said. “But… I think… You should take me to The Three Broomsticks for a drink, and then you should take me back to your room and… distract me.” He blushed. “I mean, if that’s not too… forward… I mean, we’re already sleeping together, but… Fuck, I sound like a moron.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“Yeah but...,” Aiden began. But he knew that was true. He’d read several of the biographies on Harry Potter. The Ministry hadn’t done shit then. But at least he wasn’t physically hurt. “I just...,” he groaned softly, after the kiss. “Okay, yeah,” he mumbled softly, leaning in and kissing Declan again. “We’ll do that. But it’s a date, not just our usual... whatever,” he pointed out with a small smile.

[tartan-prince-blog]

“I’m not gonna get hurt, Cap.  I just can’t handle the team treating me like I’m the least experienced one here.  I gotta prove I was worth picking.  That I’m not just riding on Dad’s name.  You get it, right?”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“Well you are the least experienced here. They’ve been on the team for a lot longer than you. And I didn’t pick you for your name, I saw potential. But if you get hurt then that’s just a waste of it,”

[bassaniboy-blog]

Declan bit his lip and stared at the floor, his shoulders sagging. “Me, too. But… Gabe’s okay. That’s what’s important. And you… You’re gonna be okay, too, because you’re not gonna get close enough to him to get hurt.” He shook his head. “You can’t do anything about it. You’re seventeen, and he’s… a powerful wizard, with a lot of friends. And besides, I don’t need you to swoop in like some kind of knight in shining armor, I need…” He grabbed Aiden’s hand. “You know what? Fuck it. Let’s go somewhere, right now. Anywhere. Forget about that bastard for a couple hours.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

Aiden frowend slightly. He hated seeing Declan sad like this in any way. “No one’s going to get hurt,” he said softly. “I can do a lot about it. I can... I dunno, I can punch him or go to the Ministry or Auror’s or something! Anything,” he said with another pout. “I...,” Aiden looked at his hand and frowned, biting his lower lip. He wasn’t sure if he really wanted to drop this subject, but seeing Declan happy would be far better than like This. “Yeah, okay,” he said with a small nod. “Whatever you want to do,”

[bassaniboy-blog]

“Aiden…” Declan sighed and hugged Aiden tightly. “You already know,” he said. “You’d have to be stupid not to. And I know you’re not stupid.” He pulled away from Aiden, wiping at his eyes with his sleeve and hoping Aiden didn’t notice (though he probably did, because Aiden always noticed). “You know what? It doesn’t matter. Actually, it does. Because when I’m around you, I forget to be scared, and that’s dangerous. For both of us.” He shook his head. “Fuck, Charlie was right, I’m being such a pussy about this.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

Aiden stayed quiet for a moment. He did know, but he hoped that it was someone else, anyone else. “I hate him,” he mumbled softly, more to himself than Declan as he pulled him in tighter. “Hey,” Aiden said, reaching up and kissing Declan’s cheek again, he’d seen the tear and he hated it. “I’m not gonna get hurt okay? And I’m not going to let him hurt you again you hear me?”

[bassaniboy-blog]

“I’m being stubborn because I actually give a shit about you. You’re my… friend.” He was aware how awkward that sounded, but it was too late not to keep going. “I don’t want my friends to get hurt. Is that so wrong?” He couldn’t seem to let go of Aiden; his fingers tightened in Aiden’s shirt, and he was glad Aiden couldn’t see his eyes squeezing shut, as though he might have some sort of inappropriate outburst of emotion. “I know,” he said, and then he paused, unsure of what to say as he leaned into the soft touch of Aiden’s lips. “You never know when to give up, and I don’t want it to get you hurt… because he… He’d kill you. He’d kill me. And I don’t want that to happen, okay?”

[aidencassidy-blog]

Aiden winced slightly at being called a friend, even though he had done that just a bit before to Declan. He was glad that Declan wasn’t pulling away though. At least he wasn’t chasing after him right now. “Hey,” he said softly, kissing him again softly. “Who’re you so afraid of huh?” Aiden mumbled softly. But he had an idea from Declan’s little slip ups. He just hoped he was wrong.

[tartan-prince-blog]

“We’ve only got a month before it!  I gotta step it up!  C’mon, nobody needs to know I’m doing extra practice.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“I know you’re doing extra practice. And I don’t want you to get hurt,”

[tartan-prince-blog]

“School rules or captain’s rules?”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“Both probably. I don’t know. I don’t want you getting in trouble before the match,”

[tartan-prince-blog]

“It doesn’t say anywhere in the student handbook that this is against the rules.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“Oi. I’m telling you it’s against the rules, so it is,”

[bassaniboy-blog]

Declan shook his head. “You can’t say that, because it’s a bloody lie. Maybe you won’t hurt me, but somebody will, and then I’ll get scared, and I’ll hurt you. That’s what I do. It’s what I always do. I can’t…” He couldn’t do anything else. Part of him thought he’d lost the ability to have a relationship the right way. He thought for a moment he’d got Aiden going, made him forget, but it looked like Aiden never forgot about anything. Declan slumped into Aiden’s arms and sighed. “Aiden, please,” he said. “I know how this is gonna go. We’d go out for dinner a couple times, and then I’d get scared and start pulling away, and you’d get tired of being my dirty little secret, and then before you know it… We’d be right back where we started. Just fucking. And then it’d hurt too much to even do that, and I’d lose… I mean, it’d all be over.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“It’s not a lie. It’s the truth. You’re just being stubborn and won’t see it,” he replied, growing slightly frustrated at Declan. It wasn’t like Declan was saying he didn’t like him. This was something else, and AIden was determined not to let this go. He let Declan slump and just held him against him, giving him a soft squeeze. “You don’t know that’ll happen,” he said, pulling back slightly to kiss his cheek. “Maybe you’ll pull away, but if you don’t think I won’t  chase after you then you don’t know me all that well,” he replied with a small smile. “I’m not giving up on you okay?”

[bassaniboy-blog]

“No, I don’t,” Declan said, with a pout. He was losing the will to keep up the smile, what with Aiden saying all this stuff about dates. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Declan had only started this affair with the understanding that it wouldn’t happen. And now everything was going to hell, and he wanted to tell Aiden no and walk away and never go back to Gryffindor Tower, but he just couldn’t. Every time he opened his mouth to tell Aiden so, his breath caught somewhere in his throat. “It’s not okay,” he said. “Please, please don’t want to go out with me. Please just don’t. You’re gonna get hurt, and I’m gonna get hurt, and I’m tired of everybody hurting.” His hands shook, and they reached up towards Aiden almost of their own accord, and Declan suddenly found himself angry at how easily Aiden could tear his walls down. They needed to go back up. Everything needed to go back to the way it was before. He pushed Aiden’s shoulders with his trembling hands, until Aiden was backed up against the wall. Declan looked around quickly, making sure they were alone, and then he pressed his body against Aiden’s, letting his lips brush against Aiden’s neck as he spoke. “This is what you wanted me for,” he said. “I can do this. Come on, just let the date stuff go and go back to having fun.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“Yeah you do. You’re doing it now,” Aiden teased. “C’mon. I’m not gonna get hurt, and you aren’t either. When have I ever hurt you huh? I want this. I know what I want,” he insisted, brows furrrowed. He didn’t know why Declan was being to stubborn about this. They had been seeing each other all the time by this point. Hell, Declan spent most nights with him in his bed. He let himself get pushed backwards against the wall, letting out a low groan. Declan knew just where to kiss him, and his hands instinctively wrapped around Declan’s waist, tugging him in close. “That’s... no,” he said, giving him a squeeze and pressing his face against Declan’s neck. “That’s not what I want now. I want you, all of you. Not just sex. Just one date?”

[bassaniboy-blog]

“Oh, come on, I don’t pout like a thirteen-year-old girl, that’s totally not fair!” Declan protested, giving Aiden a light shove with his elbows. He couldn’t help leaning closer to Aiden a bit, and he didn’t understand why he felt the need to let Aiden get so close. It was a bad idea, but the warmth that radiated off Aiden was almost intoxicating. “I… You shouldn’t, though,” he said. “I don’t want you to worry about me. I just want you to… have fun with me. And we’ve been doing that, right? You’ve been… having fun?” He turned red at Aiden’s question, but as soon as he got his wits back, he shook his head emphatically. “No, Ca–I, I mean Aiden. I… We can’t do that. I can’t go out with you, it wouldn’t be fair to you, because I’m… you know…” In the closet, the son of an abusive homophobe, scared shitless. All of the above, actually, but he hoped Aiden wouldn’t make him say any of them out loud.

[aidencassidy-blog]

“You do pout, and it’s pretty adorable,” Aiden replied with a laugh, letting Declan lean in and grinning. “Of course I’ve been having fun,” Aiden said with a frown. But he had an idea of what Declan had meant by that. “But I have fun just being around you. I like just talking with you, holding you, spending time with you. All that stuff. I’ve never wanted to do that with anyone before,” Aiden said earnestly, trying to get Declan to see what he felt. “It’s okay, whatever it is is okay. I still want to go out with you. Please? Give me one date,”

[bassaniboy-blog]

“Yeah?” Declan grinned. “Show me, then.” He tried his best to keep smiling, but he really couldn’t as Aiden held his hands. Shit. Aiden must have drawn conclusions, taken what Declan had said as some kind of declaration of love. That wasn’t how Declan had meant it at all. He’d just meant… He didn’t know what he’d meant. That was why he hadn’t meant to say it in the first place. “I know, I know you’re not, I just… Look, it doesn’t matter. I mean, obviously you being alive, a-and fine, that matters, but… You don’t need to be all… all worried about how I feel and shit. I’m fine.”

[aidencassidy-blog]

“Fine I will!” he said and he mocked Declan’s pouty face, doing his best to get as good of an impersonation as possible. “But...,” Aiden paused, sorting through his emotions for a moment until he realized what he was feeling. “What if I want to worry about you,” he said softly, looking down at Declan’s hands and then back into his face. Aiden paused, only for a moment, before continuing. “Let me take you out huh? Dinner or something. It’ll be brilliant,”