I Canât Help Falling In Love With You {Tag; Tegan}
Reaching out worriedly to settle a hand atop Aidenâs own, Tegan felt the pinprick of self-doubt turn to a needling concern over Theodoreâs wellbeing. The former hitman, the addict from the alleys, the cocky, smarmy young man who had a tendency of blowing things up without entirely intending to at timesâŠwas crying. Or about to cry. It was an injury Tegan could feel sing in his bones, prickle at his nerves, and cut him deep. He could no more heal this than he could heal something fatal. Not without giving up all of himself in the process, and wasnât that what marriage was about?
This was something heâd given Aiden in the hopes itâd be enough. To make him happy, to give him a sense of wholeness. More than mere marriage, it wasâan identity. A sense of self he could mold as he saw fit. A fresh start beyond a little golden ring and a house in San Francisco. More than a marriage and a family and a dog.
Tegan gave Theodore; Theodore.
Because Tegan believed in him and knew he was so much more than explosions and mistakes orchestrated by the harsh hand life had dealt him. And maybe Tegan hadnât gone down the same path as Aiden; maybe heâd been more subdued by the system that turned against him. Maybe heâd just been more broken than explosiveâŠ
But they had similar origins, and Tegan wanted to give Aiden a means to grow as he hadâif not in the same way. An oak couldnât grow like an ivy, after all, and Aiden had never been subtle or submissive. He wasâstronger, Tegan felt, in a lot of ways, than himself.
He just needed to be given a little bit of sunlight.
âI do,â Tegan aid hoarsely, feeling choked by more than the knot in his tie, âIâm just sorry it took me this long.â He squeezed Aidenâs hands and pulled them up to kiss them.
âHappy belated anniversary, or early ChristmasâŠThanksgiving?â he tried weakly, wishing he knew how to make light of this. Heâd never been great at that.
âYouâre Theodore Wolfe,â Tegan added hoarsely. âAnd I love you, new life, old life, and everything besides.â
Aiden held Teganâs hand against him like it was the anchor for the storm going on inside him. And he was, as he always had been. Somehow, the two street urchins had wound up in a nice house together. They even had a dog and 2.5 kids. All they were missing was the white picket fence - and that was a damn good ways from where they had begun it all. It was a miracle, really, and Aiden reveled in it as he held Teganâs hand.Â
A new life, or a new identity to go with his new life. It wasnât erasure of the past, he told himself that. It wasnât burying who he was and pretending as though heâd never been that person. No, this was more likeâŠgiving that person a chance to see it through life. To make it there, somehow, to the other side of everything on his own.Â
Heâd been taking night classes in computer programming, the kind that didnât ask for background records or previous conviction rates. He actually had a knack for it - which amused him as heâd hated math when he was in school. But with this, he could do something more than just a few night classes in between the times he played piano and sang. He still didnât know what he wanted to be when he finally must pick whether to grow up or not, but thisâŠthis meant options.Â
Putting the folder aside, he flung his arms around Tegan and squeezed him tight. âI love ya too, Tegan,â he said, keeping his grip around him so that he didnât lose the grip he had on himself. âHowâŠHow did ya do all âf this? Why? Tegan, ya sentimental, âanâsome devilâŠâ
He pulled back to look at him, his face now alight with a smile that set off a single tear sparkling in the light of the room. âI canâ thank ya enough fer thisâŠâ
Given that San Franciscoâs layout didnât really lend itself to a white picket fence [the rolling hills, for example, the clustered houses, and urbane dwelling places, you know], truth be told, the Wolfe pack was doing exceptionally well. One was a chemist and a financier, on the cutting edge of tomorrow with drugs he intended to use to change the world for better. Another had helped him get thereâwhereas before he wouldâve squandered his life making poor-quality medicine for a firm as ruthless as its former head. That man whoâd helped achieve a better tomorrow was backed by the true heroâan antihero whose heroics lay not in his actions of former jobs, but in the actions of a man who was himself despite all odds; jobs or otherwise. He was a wonderful dancer and maker of macaroni; his piano playing and singing had stolen Teganâs heart.
Aiden was, for all intents and purposes, the only reason Tegan found a reason to move along.
Wrapping hesitant arms around Aiden, relieved and thrown out of his concerned daze all at the same time, Tegan buried his face against Theodoreâs hair and smiled shakilyâhalf-sobbing, really, and half-laughing. âIâit was hardly me, Jadis had the connectionsâŠmost of it wasâisâlegal, I justâŠhelped fine-tune the details. Theodore Aiden Wolfe; model U.S. citizen, I..â he quieted, rubbing Aidenâs back tenderly. âJust wanted you to have this. American dream be damned; Teddy, youâare the love of my life.â He pulled back to stare at Theodore simultaneous with his husbandâs movement, long face fond.
âYouâre my dream,â he said firmly, though his voice stayed, as it almost always did, reserved and quiet. âBeing yours is thanks enough.â
Aiden couldnât quite let go, at least not yet. He kept hands on Tegan, as though to make sure that this wasnât a dream; that his life hadnât pulled a number on him, wouldnât take it all away. No, he wanted to keep Tegan, just as he wanted to keep this new record. He wanted to start again, to do something, to build something more from his life. Services for others were all well and good, but he did have acts he wanted to do...as soon as he figured out what those acts were.
âYeâre thâ love âf mine, did ya know thaâ?â Aiden asked with a laugh. He held up his hand to show off the ring resting upon his finger. âSee thaâ? Only one âve ever âad--only one I wanted tâ âave. Ya charmer. Ya swept me off mah feet. Didnâ give me no warninâ.â
But the laughter died to a comfortable quiet, a caring quiet. The kind of quiet one only gets after being married for so long. âLooâ, Tegan...I really âppreciate this. I canâ even puâ ât into words, yaâve stopped me cold ân mah tracks...Thank ya. Thank ya so much.â
And with that, he reached for Teganâs hand, so that he could hold it in his. Give it a squeeze. ââll make ya macaroni ânâ cheese. Special celebration.â








