you can jerk off to anything. just the other day i jerked off to a crisp and refreshing spring breeze
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Not today Justin

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i don't do bad sauce passes
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@ailuvohringe
you can jerk off to anything. just the other day i jerked off to a crisp and refreshing spring breeze
Sometimes I remember that all lesbianism is named after 1 really gay lady from 4000 years ago. Whether you use the term Sapphic or lesbian, it still is from her which is hilarious, hope she enjoys being women loving incarnate
adult life is truly just thinking “I NEED TO CLEAN” while dealing with the 17 other things that have a hard deadline
if i tell yall what i did on the tram today yall would call it a fake tumblr story i think
so it helps to know that my mindset at the time was influenced by having been transphobically sealioned at a temping agency earlier, as well as spontaneously turning up to a different temping agency without an appointment & actually landing with them after THOSE guys turned out to be cool.
I was on the tram (crowded tram) (just after 11 AM) on my way home full of adrenaline still, and saw my dad eating a banana on the platform. I could get out of the tram to say hi, but then i'd miss the tram, or worse, hold it up. What i COULD do, however, is sprint out of the tram as soon as the door opens, take a bite from the banana my dad is holding, and SPRINT back into the tram before the doors close. So That Is What I Did.
unfortunately now roughly half of the passengers of the tram were looking at me like I was suddenly some sort of feral spirit of hunger or perhaps a strange insect of some sort.* Fortunately, the truth was also the ONE sequence of words that could make what they had just witnessed okay. I went "das ist mein papa!!!" which is german for "thats my dad!!!!!"
My dad seemed genuinely delighted by this btw. the look on his face was fucking PRICELESS
i would like to beat the little german boy accusations based on my behavior before they arise. i am in fact a tall german trans girl.
however in everything except body i AM calvin from calvin & hobbes
Happiness Will Come To You.
when tho
When You Least Expect It. Probably Late March
reblog for happiness to come for you in late march!
I WANT A FOUR DAY WORK WEEK
I WANT A SIX HOUR WORK DAY
I WANT A $25 MINIMUM WAGE
I WANT A MINIMUM OF 20 PAID DAYS OFF PLUS PUBLIC HOLIDAYS OFF
I WANT AN AUTOMATED INCOME TAX SYSTEM THAT PUTS THE OWNESS ON THE GOVERNMENT TO DO THE LEG WORK AND TELL YOU WHAT YOU OWE
Chilchuck the short king
ill be sappy whenever i want. i dont give a shit. i love you. fuck off
i see posts here about how people are so mortified when they are acknowledged as being a regular customer somewhere that they never return. cowards. the employees at taco bell treat me like a celebrity. like royalty. i am their strange little pet customer who gets traded along as staff comes and goes. they know my car before i even speak in the drive-thru speaker. today i was 2 hours late and she ran over and squealed that she "thought i'd left them!" and that she "made my order with extra love!" and you what, she did
it's funny that this is getting notes again, because last night i went to the thai place in my neighborhood. it's run by a family and during covid times i ate there literally almost every day. later i cut back on eating out so much and hadn't been there in two years but last night we went and ate inside for the first time ever and the owner ran over to say hello and ask how i was, and repeated our old regular order. it was sweet. it's so easy to feel like you are an island, but stuff like this reminds you that you are part of a community.
Being a regular is fucking awesome. I've only had that status a few times, but I always feel kind of honored. These people see humans all day every day, and they remembered me?! And not for something bad (as far as I can tell)! I'm flattered af!
someone save namjoon
Finally got around to drawing Jinx!
a lil lemon bulbasaur 🍋🌱
“we need to stop the stigma towards drug users and addicts” and “we need to challenge the idea that being sober makes you boring” and “we need to stop acting like binge drinking to the extent you’re doing medical damage is fun and normal for young people” are all ideas that can and should coexist.
just so we’re clear, the threshold for “binge drinking to the extent you’re doing medical damage” is waaaay lower than you think.
I work in an obstetrician and gynaecologist’s office. we have to tell patients on a regular basis that they are binge drinking weekly when they think they are simply consuming a normal amount of alcohol on the weekends.
having more than 3 drinks in a single sitting if you have an estrogen based endocrine system is a binge that is medically significant.
having more than 5 in a sitting is a medically significant binge for someone with a testosterone based endocrine system.
every time you do this, it significantly impacts your risk of getting breast cancer, and damages your liver. it takes time to recover from that liver damage. if you’re having a 3-5 or more drink binge on a weekly basis, you are an alcoholic, medically speaking, and your liver is not recovering.
again: the bar for what binge drinking is, medically, is so much lower than what you think it is.
alcohol is a really toxic substance and not something you should fuck around with.
again: if you have an estrogenized hormone system (common for most women), then 3 drinks is a binge. if you have a testosteronized hormone system (common for most men), then 5 drinks is a binge.
anything above that number, consumed as frequently as weekly or more, and you’re medically a binge drinking alcoholic.
also, if you’re drinking any quantity of alcohol 6 days a week or more, that’s another threshold at which, medically speaking, you meet the definition of alcoholism. your liver needs more days without alcohol in your system than just one a week to recover and be healthy.
I don’t say any of this to shame anyone—to me, alcoholism or substance use disorders aren’t a sign of weakness or moral failing. and most of us genuinely don’t know this stuff.
rather—I point this out because it’s important to reduce harm, and find ways to live healthier, happier lives. there is a life outside of constant binge drinking. it’s not always easy to find it. but it’s out there. you deserve a life where your emotional needs are met by something other than alcohol, and a life in which your liver is healthy, and the ways you cope and celebrate and find joy don’t put you at increased risk of cancer.
also–even if alcohol is the only way you can self-medicate, or if you choose to go on with your alcohol usage anyway regardless of other options–you still deserve to know what it’s doing to your body.
information is key. you don’t have to stop drinking, but the utter lack of education on alcohol + the normalization of binge drinking in current society leads to many people drinking without any idea of what it’s doing to their bodies.
addicts deserve accurate medical information regardless of what they decide to do with it. for some people, losing liver function is worth the benefits they get from binge drinking, but they can’t make that choice if they don’t know what the consequences are to begin with.
addicts deserve accurate medical information regardless of what they decide to do with it.
REST IN PEACE, DEAR MOONBIN (1998-2023)
What’s your typical day like?
i wake up. i malfunction. i call it a day
BARBIE (2023) dir. Greta Gerwig