ajd poetry

assorted poetry that i have written throughout the years of wildly varying quality. this blog is essentially a dumping ground for stuff i write. check my about for more info. feel free to ask me stuff, too. note: i've noticed that a lot of my formating doesn't show up well on mobile, just a heads up.

[ajdpoetry]

I want to start writing again, but I don't even know where to start.

[ajdpoetry]

Lately I've been craving your touch,

Longing for the feeling of your

Soft, angelic skin pressed against mine;

For our hands to be locked together,

Or yours to be running through my hair

As I pull you closer;

For the taste of your gentle lips...

I long to be lying in bed with you again,

Fighting off sleep, because even though

We're both tired, neither of us

Want this moment to end.

[ajdpoetry]

I dreamt of you again last night.

It seemed so real, for awhile,

But when your lips connected

With mine and my arms wrapped

Around you as the water cascaded

Down the two of us, standing spell-bound,

I knew it was a dream, I knew it was my dream,

And I didn't want to wake up.

[ajdpoetry]

Just a few steps down

An almost-hidden staircase, tucked

Around an unassuming street corner

Off a bustling thoroughfare,

You'll find me sitting in

A dark basement bar.

The wood paneled walls are

Dimly lit by the warm, worn light

Of aging incandescents.

It is cold outside, up above,

But the atmosphere down here

Is warm and inviting, as people gather

And drinks flow.

It feels a little like a secret,

Something that's been kept

From you, but no

-- you just need to look a little

Closer, and you'll find it's been there all along.

[ajdpoetry]

These streets look so beautiful

At night, illuminated

By the copper-tone glow

Of the olive-colored street lamps...

I can almost imagine how

Wonderful the city lights would

Shine in your eyes

[ajdpoetry]

The city always looks so beautiful

Freshly covered in snow.

The olive colored street lights

Shine a bit brighter

In the padded silence of night;

I am alone, standing on a street corner,

But things feel alright

Under the cool winter snow.

[ajdpoetry]

Alone, at night

These thoughts of mine

Come alive --

Alive, but unorganized

unable or unwilling

to be transcribed, described, or easily defined.

I lie awake

[ajdpoetry]

Yearning for something more,

Wrapped in memories of a time

When we were closer, warm.

Now and again those times seem so far,

Yet every so often it all feels within my reach,

If I could just bring myself to try,

And I've done it once before, but

Things are so different now; the years

Have passed by, I'm far from home...

I just don't know for sure

Whether this connection has survived

The passage of time

For you, the way that is has inside

My heart and mind.

So, a little afraid and a bit nervous,

I hesitate,

And wonder whether the courage

Will ever come

To take another plunge.

[ajdpoetry]

Sometimes I wonder,

Usually late at night, whether

This loneliness will ever

Go completely away...

I've been quite happy on my own --

Certainly a welcome change --

Yet now and again, mostly when alone,

That not-so-strange

Feeling that something is missing

Comes creeping back into my brain.

Sometimes I wonder

If anyone but her

Could actually make it go away...

I think I am afraid

Of the answer, either way.

[ajdpoetry]

I have never stopped loving you.

I have tried, the past eight years or so,

And even loved other people in that time,

As I tried to get you out of my mind

And move on with my life, but no.

Though it has ebbed and flowed

From the fore to the depths below,

My love for you could not be restrained,

And so, to this day, it remains.

[ajdpoetry]

today you should be turning twenty-three we should be celebrating, we should be drinking -- and dancing and singing and laughing and partying instead this day has become yet another reminder of all that we have lost, since you’ve been gone but I won’t let this be the end no matter how hard it gets I must remember, my friend, to celebrate your life rather than dwell too long on your death happy birthday, Ben.

[ajdpoetry]

I cannot see the end

deep down below

shrouded in darkness

yet still I wonder

should I leap?

[ajdpoetry]

the truth is that you will be

alone for the majority

of the time that you will see

on this planet. learn this early

and I promise that you will be

far more happy.

[ajdpoetry]

everything’s green

again and new,

shades of blue

and yellow too

though I feel happy and renewed

here in the sunlight

of the early spring

I can’t help but think

about you

how you should be here

and how hard everything

has been

since you left.

spring might have brought

with it the breath

of life

but this world hasn’t been

as green or as bright

since your death.

[ajdpoetry]

alone here I sit

listening to the rain

drops as they hit

my windshield, mesmerized

as they slowly drain

down the glass --

drip drip,

drip -- alas!

off now I must go;

to end this moment of bliss

brings me no joy, for I know

no sound quite as peaceful as this

[ajdpoetry]

i’m so tired of being shy it’s holding me back from being who i want to be and leading the life i want to lead i want to travel, to go out and see all that the world has to offer, to explore, to experience, to be happy, and enjoy this life that i’ve got yet, something, call it fear or self-doubt, won’t let me try but, no, enough. here and not a step further! i must find a way to break free, to unleash me i’m tired of wondering about what could be.

[ajdpoetry]

sometimes the dark creeps in and builds slowly to a storm crushing and tearing apart from within when the dark threatens to envelope everything remember that the sun will rise and do not give in