âwhy did liam say thatâ is always something whimsical and aloof and âwhy did noel say thatâ is always something that he conjured up from the depths of hell
Twenty-eight year old tennis golden boy, Damon Albarn falls through the ranks as he faces a loss against newcomer Albert Johnson. Many analysists claim that this is the beginning of the end for Albarn as his career slowly begins to take a nosedive from his peak two years ago at Wimbledon. Having not had a win in the entire season, Albarn is faced with many disappointed fans â as well as a disappointed wife.
UNHAPPY WIFE, UNHAPPY LIFE; THE COURT CATCHES STRIFE
Former tennis star The Nightmare makes an appearance at her husband â Damon Albarnâs match with Albert Johnson yesterday in London. She is currently acting as Albarnâs coach, after her own 1992 injury has rendered her unable to step back into the court she has once called home.
The Nightmareâs influence on Albarnâs career is undeniable. What was once a fledgling star on Challengers in small towns is now known globally for his talent with a racket. However, all of The Nightmareâs troubles have recently been in vain, for Albarn is facing a career-ending losing streak the size of Edinburgh.
His current stats have been plummeting after his stellar performance in Wimbledon in 1994. Albarn has been losing to newcomers such as Johnson as well as Monroe, Fairchild, and Diaz. His recent fall in rank has been leaving the tennis community wondering; is this the end? If so, how in the world would The Nightmare let it end?
GALLAGHER BACK ON TRACK
We all thought the weâve seen the last of Liam Gallagher. A tennis guru with all the skill yet seemingly none of the passion. Early 1994 saw the end of Gallagherâs bountiful career when he traded in the racket for a cold glass of lager. Since then, Gallagher has effectively disappeared from the court.
Until now.
Multiple sources have confirmed that Gallagher has recently signed up for the Challenger to be held in Leeds this upcoming February. Fans speculate that he has been gearing up for the long awaited comeback in the two years heâs been out of commission. But when asked for a statement, Gallagher bluntly states, âWas out of money, me. As broke as a shattered piggy bank,â he shrugged. âFigured this would be an easy way to get bank. Iâm good at this shite.â
Famous for his unexpected rise in ranks, you may remember Gallagher as the former gardener at the Manchester Tennis Club where he one day decided to pick up a racket and see where it took him. With his humble beginnings, many were charmed by Gallagher and his boyish swagger, and they were even more taken by the force in which he wields a racket.
ALBARN RETRACES HIS STEPS!
In a career-defining risk, The Nightmare makes the shocking decision to enter her husband, Damon Albarn, into a small Challenger in Leeds. It is an obvious bid to have him rise up the ranks, having small time opponents that heâd no doubt have no trouble winning against. However, with his current losing streak, we have to ask; maybe retirement wouldnât be so bad?
LIAM GALLAGHER: IâM GONNA SMASH THAT ****âS FACE UP WITH HIS OWN RACKET
In an unshocking display of aggression, twenty-four year old tennis star, Liam Gallagher makes a bold statement to a crowd of reporters asking him about his impending reunion with Albarn on the court and if he thinks he could manage beating his former doubles partner.
To jog your memory, 1988 saw the rise of The Golden Boy and The Wildcard â Albarn and Gallagher respectively. They were a known duo in local and international tennis competitions where they competed in youth doubles. They gathered wins like stones and were celebrated in the tennis community as the next big thing.
However, 1992 saw the downfall of the duo when Gallagherâs then girlfriend, tennis breakout star, The Nightmare had a career ending injury. Neither party issued a statement since.
THE NIGHTMARE: ITâS ALL ABOUT WATCHING SOME GOOD ****ING TENNIS
Since stepping foot in Leeds, The Nightmare makes her first statement to the press. And itâs not PR for Albarnâs dwindling career â how shocking! No, she makes a statement in retaliation to a reporterâs blunt question about having Albarn and Gallagher competing again like old times and âhad she felt like she was missing outâ?
With the temper we all know and love, inside the court and outside of it, she snaps. âYou lot love to stand out here and make assumptions on our lives, on our careers, on our ranks,â she spits. âThatâs not what this is about. This entire season, youâve been obsessed with stats and charts. But for me, itâs about watching some good ****ing tennis.â
Albarn comes to collect his wife shortly after the outburst, giving the press a good natured, media-trained statement, before retreating back into his private court with his coach slash wife. Albarnâs career might be falling apart, but we know that some things will always stay the same. For example, his wifeâs spitfire way of looking at the world. What a shame her career came to such an abrupt end.
a/n: i know nothing of tennis but know much about challengers! anyway, this is just a short concept bc i needed an excuse to make that challengers edit. hope u liked it !!!!
if you discover the right bands in the right order when you're 14 you will form an unshakable belief that will last you a lifetime which is that rock'n'roll is the most important thing in the universe. And it is
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