Making my little sister identify characters from Shadow and Bone:
“Her name is Rebecca Brown. She’s in a fight, I guess. Why’s she fighting?”
“Actually, it looks like she’s fighting herself. Maybe this is some kind of inner conflict thing.”
“Those two in the back are her older brothers. Oh wait there’s three dudes! She’s got three brothers. The other one is shy.”
(Why are her brothers at her fight?) “They’re critiquing her form.”
“His name is Jon Gun. No H in the Jon. His name was originally just ‘Jon,’ but he loved his gun so much that he legally changed his name.”
“I didn’t know they had guns in the fantasy world. He used to be with the police but now he’s kind of in a Javert situation where he’s running around doing his own thing.”
“His favorite time of the year is Christmas time. He looks afraid.”
“Oh, he’s kind of pretty! Wait, who is that? Okay, his name is… he’s got like a bear shawl. That’s pretty cool.”
“His name is Norman. He’s really into like, hair care and skincare. He’s got that glowing fantasy face.”
(What are his abilities? What are some things he can do?) “He’s lactose intolerant.”
“He’s just like a landowner. He doesn’t really do much. Maybe he’s into like, pyramid schemes. Maybe he sells… essential elixirs. I like him a lot. He’s cool.”
“He looks like the personification of Slytherin. He looks nasty! I don’t like him. He looks so greasy.”
(Are you going to roast him the entire time or tell me who he is?) “His cheekbones are the bones in Shadow and Bone. He’s so strong he could beat up a dude with those cheekbones.”
“He looks like a rat. I feel like he started a gang on a dare and got really into it, and is the proud leader now.”
“Oh wait, the crows! He’s the head raven! Look at that scepter. Big Raven. That’s his prison name.”
*Reverent gasp* “Ooh, she scares me.”
“Her name is Kim Knife. It’s like Jon Gun, but it’s Kim Knife. They are siblings.”
“That knife is her favorite knife. She named it… Little Man. It’s kind of like she always looks out for the little man… it’s a metaphor.”
“Which of these people are the six crows? I feel like she’s one of them.”
“Smiling! He’s smiling! That’s nice.”
“His name is Darby. He is a little messenger boy, but he’s actually a grown man. He just liked his job so much that he kept doing it.”
“He’s really cute. See, this is a nice change from the greasy man.”
“He and Norman aren’t friends but they do know each other. They see each other on the streets. (What do they do when they see each other?) They probably have a secret handshake.”
“This boy has never done a drug in his life.”
“He’s one of the six. He looks frostbitten. Someone get this poor boy a hot potato. He’s about to die.”
“His name is like, Lauren, but masculine…”
“His code name is Crow Four. (What are his skills?) He can’t do much. He’s good at making sandwiches. He packs the team sandwiches when they go on trips.”
“What happened in this scene is they went on vacation but they left him behind.” (like Home Alone?) “Like Home Alone.”
I just hope you realize he’s going to die, and there will only be Five of Crows.”
“I like that guy in the back with the hat. Can we talk about him?”
“I think she’s also a crow but she’s not as into it as the others are. She’s Crow Two.”
“I want to talk about muffin man in the back.”
“Her name is Jessie. I think she’s rich and she’s kind of snooty about it. Why is it so cold? It looks like she’s freezing. It must be really cold in this world.”
“I think the muffin man in the back is her servant. I want to talk about him.”
“Her name is Wilhelmina. It looked like she was on the cellphone. Doesn’t it look like she has a phone?”
“She’s not one of the six, because they’re not allowed to have social media. She’s an ambassador for Norman’s company.”
“She’s afraid of bats. That is one of the reasons she’s not a crow. She thinks crows are too much like bats. What if crows are going extinct in this world and that’s why there’s only six?”
*gasp* “He’s really cute.”
“They call him Crow One. (He’s the leader?) No, no, Big Raven is the leader. Crow One is one of the crows.”
“I can’t tell if he’s a goat or a man that got magicked into a goat. I like the idea that this is just a man with a goat head.”
“He looks very noble. Before he was reincarnated as a goat, he was a prince.”
“Why? Why is there a goat?”
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