Self-Referral
A good girl knows what to do when the bad thoughts happen.
-
Lucy had just got out the shower when a thought struck her.
Thoughts were not meant to strike her. She wasn't meant to be thinking at all if she could help it, and certainly not thoughts that weren't the ones that Daddy had so carefully put into her head. This thought wasn't one of those thoughts - those ones made her feel safe and fuzzy.
This thought didn't.
It came out of nowhere and made the bottom fall out of her stomach and her eyes widen and a shiver run right up her spine.
The thought was:
I shouldn't be like this.
And the voice the thought had used only made it worse. Lucy knew that voice. Her voice, but not. Her old voice. How she'd used to sound.
Immediately she was filled with deep and paralyzing anxiety. She didn't really understand the thought - and didn't want to dwell on it enough to start understanding it - but that it was there at all was awful. Like a bubble, the feeling grew inside her, growing more severe by the second.
If she wasn't careful, she might do something she'd regret. Like try to understand the words, try to work back on where they might have come from, and what, if anything, they might mean.
Lucy was a good girl though. She knew what she was meant to do when this or things like this happened. Daddy had taught her. Fighting through the anxiousness and the dread that had frozen her she immediately ran from the room to go and find Daddy.
He was in the kitchen, and he smiled on seeing her coming, but his expression turned more serious when he noticed how worked up she was.
"What is it?" He asked. Lucy, mind whirling, did her best to get her words to come out right:
"Daddy, it's - I p-put the towel on and - and I was thinking, then I noticed I was thinking! And I-I - it was scary! It was almost l-like - it was like before!"
Before, before Daddy, before she'd been a good girl. A time she hated to think about, a time she'd prefer she could forget completely. He said she would, eventually, but not yet. Little bits came back sometimes, like just now, and it was always horrible.
Even putting the words togethr so Daddy knew what was wrong was enough to make a little of the old her leak through. Just tiny bits, like little drips and drops, but that was still too much, and also that thought again:
I shouldn't be like this.
"You were thinking? Your own thoughts?" He asked, all serious. It made Lucy's eyes widen when he sounded like that. It usually meant something about her needed fixing.
"Only for a second, Daddy! Only for a second! I didn't mean it!"
His face softened.
"It's okay, it's okay, shh. Come here."
She moved in closer to him, and gasped when his hand came up between her legs. She hadn't put any clothes back on yet. He cupped her cunt a moment, then slid a finger easily into her. Her brain fizzed.
"You did the right thing coming to me quickly," he said. Lucy couldn't really concentrate on what he was saying because of what his fingers - two, now - were doing, but she knew she had to listen so she tried really, really hard.
"T-thank you Daddy," she said. It was getting hard to stay standing properly so she was grateful when Daddy helpfully lent her forward a little so she could lean on him instead. Made it much easier. Lucy closed her eyes. Could listen better that way.
"There are still a few of your old thoughts still in there, I know. We've worked very hard to get rid of them and almost all of them are gone now. You're such a good girl now. But there's still some little bits left. It's scary when they drift through your head, isn't it?"
All of that anxiety from before had melted. She was safe now. Daddy had her. He knew what to do to make it better. Lucy was light and empty and safe. Eyes still closed, she smiled.
"Yesss..."
"That's because they don't belong in your head anymore. They never did. They were never meant to be there. The only thoughts that should be in your pretty, silly head are the ones that I put there. Yes?"
"Yess - unh - Daddy..."
He had ways of reaching spots inside her she hadn't even known existed before. In her head and in other places, too. If she wasn't leaning on him, she probably would have slid to her knees by now.
"Good girl. Now - and I know this won't be fun - what was it you were thinking?"
Lucy grimaced. She didn't want to remember it, didn't want to go back to it. Between Daddy's fingers and his words she'd almost entirely forgotten what she'd been upset about in the first place. She was back at it now though, because she couldn't not do what he'd asked. She had to tell him.
"I-it was the old m-me saying that - that I shouldn't be like this..."
Saying it out loud to him made her feel so ashamed and stupid. She almost whined when his fingers stopped, too. He was disappointed. He had to be. She'd been bad.
"That's a silly thought, isn't it?" He asked quietly.
"So silly, Daddy! It's stupid and bad and wrong and silly and-"
"Shh," he went, and she immediately stopped talking. He didn't say anything to fill the void, but his fingers did start moving again, now just gently running up and down the length of her slit, making her twitch and mewl. Eventually he said: "We're going to make that thought go away forever, okay?"
"Okay!"
Dazed, Lucy couldn't really follow how she then ended up on her back with Daddy between her legs. It had kind of been a blur. Now instaed of his fingers running up and down her cunt, it was the fat head of his cock. That just made it even harder to keep things clear.
Then he started guiding himself into her.
Daddy had told her that when her cunt leaked - and it was always like that - it was her brains and old thoughts leaking out, making her better. He'd said that she could do a lot of that herself and that it was good for her, which was why she had to play every single day. He'd also said that for the really tough bits that didn't want to leak away, his cock squeezed them out.
Lucy knew he was right, because he always was, and especially because she could feel how right he was when he slid into her. With his cock in her cunt, there wasn't any room left for any of the old her anyway.
"Look at me," Daddy said, though Lucy heard him from what felt like a very long way away. She felt so full, so dreamy, but she looked at him anyway, happy smiel on her face.
"You should be like this, you were always like this."
She didn't need to repeat the words, and didn't have the brains to do it right then anyway. What he'd said was just a fact, and it sunk in. She should be like this. She was always like this. These were just facts. Anything that went against them could only be wrong.
Daddy slowly pulled out until only the head of his cock was still inside her, then firmly thrust forward again. Lucy gasped, body jolting. She lost more brains and old, dumb thoughts.
"The old you is a liar. We don't like her. She's going to lose," Daddy said. Facts. Lucy had never liked the old her. Lucy knew the old her was a liar. Lucy knew the old her was going to lose.
Another thrust from Daddy, squeezing out more of the old her, leaving more room for facts. His facts never went anywhere, her old thoughts leaked out so easily. It was why the old her was going to lose. Couldn't fight facts.
"This is the real you."
Thrust. Facts.
"The more the old you leaks away, the more the real you can shine through."
Thrust. Facts. Couldn't change facts. Lucy hadn't noticed wrapping her legs around Daddy's back, but she had. He seemed happy about it.
"I'm going to fuck you now. You don't have to think about anything. Just enjoy being the real you, hmm? My good girl," he said, starting on a rhythm and dipping his head to graze his teeth on her neck once he'd finished talking.
"Yessss, Daddy..." Lucy sighed.
She couldn't remember what had led to this, but it hardly seemed to matter at that moment.
Jesus fucking Christ.
