He should at least have some more self-love in himself! âSuch talents are wasted on himâ? Phantasos sighed. Was he one of those humans who have low self-esteem? Or was he a human who simply did not care?
âI was hoping to hear you brag about your talents. How disappointing that you have none.â
Well, whether he did not care or had low self-esteem, that was his own issue to figure out. She was more concerned that he did not know what she meant by desires. Every human should know what she meant by desires. That was why the gods called the humans selfish even if it was hypocritical of them too. She saw nothing wrong with having desires. There were even humans who tried to rid of themselves having desires which was the stupidest idea that she had ever heard of.
âDesires, ambitions, goals, a strong feeling of something you want or wish but canât have. If a genie was to appear to you and say he can grant you one wish and you can wish for anything you want, what would you wish for? Money, love, fame, a dead loved one, revenge, what is it? Or do you need me to look into your deepest desires and tell you what your own desires are?â
She asked him what kind of life did he lived. She was curious but she did not expect him to give her an answer. She thought he would avoid the question or tell her she was not allowed to ask him something so personal. So she was surprised when he answered.
He was a child used by his own parents as a slave to use his abilities and get money, become rich. Growing up to be used as a tool and given no love while being abused, she would have thought he would be angry or sad. However, his face was blank of emotion, almost as if he was at peace. Was he trying to hide his emotions or did he not care? Or perhaps, his own past broke him.
âIt was definitely not the story I was expecting. Do you desire parental love? Parents who truly love and care for you. Do you want that?â
Û â Oh, of course he didnât have any talents... Byaku laughed under his breath at that. Perhaps the only talent he had was singing--a useless thing.Â
At her question of what he âwished forâ, Byaku couldnât help but shake his head in rejection. He wanted nothing of that. There was no real âdesireâ he felt with the proposal that she gave. Money, fame, revenge - these kinds of things were material and unfitting for him; the nameless boy had no need for such things.Â
âI donât think that itâs needed to look into me to find out something that insignificant,â Byaku passed the goddess a pinched smile... something about that sounded so weird. What if she looked into his deepest desires and all she found was like... something stupid like a childrenâs toy pony? If he didnât know what he really wanted, how could someone else know?Â
At her question of him desiring parental love, the manâs expression returned to being blank.Â
He hadnât... really thought about it, and it wasnât a bother to him. He was already past the point of wanting parental love--or any sort of emotional validation.
Û â âI donât know,â he said innocently, looking up to the goddessâ eyes -- bafflement clear in his shade-shot eyes. âI never thought of it. And, besides, Minos and Lune have been with me, so I never looked back since then...â
Then after a while, he tilted his head and said, âI really have nothing that stands out for desires. Except, maybe, for people to get along?â It was hard to put that into proper words... but he hated when others fought. War, especially, was something he disliked. People of differing opinions willingly chose to spill blood rather than respect each other and find a middle ground to co-exist in. Conflict is inevitable, but it shouldnât be to the point of killing senselessly. âItâs probably a weird thing for a Specter to say though...âÂ