be not afraid of greatness

some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em albus potter, sixth year hufflepuff

[albusism]

stingslikeascorpius:

Scorpius kept trying to control himself around Albus - to fight his urges off and keep his hands to himself - but he was tired of it. Kissing Albus, touching Albus, all of it felt like the most natural thing in the world and even though he knew it was wrong he couldn’t bring himself to deny his feelings anymore.

When Albus pushed him back, he blinked at him, a sheepish expression on his face. He knew it was cowardly of him to still be with Lily - to have not been honest with her as soon as he realized his own feelings - but he also didn’t know how to break up with her and the idea of it – of outwardly admitting his own feelings – terrified him. Breaking up with Lily would make it all real, it would be something he couldn’t go back on, and while he knew it was the right thing to do, he couldn’t help but want to be a coward for a little bit longer even though the guilt of hurting her felt like it would crush him some days.

“I don’t want to stop,” he admitted, quietly, unable to stop himself from pulling Albus back in towards him, resting their foreheads against each other. “I know we shouldn’t but I don’t want to stop.”

Albus found himself biting down on his lip as he took a step back, his back pressed against the wall as he forced himself to look away from Scorpius, knowing he wouldn’t be able to resist the other’s eyes. He couldn’t keep this up, the sneaking around, the constantly looking over his shoulder- it, along with the guilt was starting to eat him alive.

What they were doing was wrong- and yet it felt so right. Nothing had ever felt so right, being with Scorpius- kissing him, touching him, felt so right. They were meant to be- he knew it, but there was one little problem. Lily. An obstacle standing in their path, Scorpius’ girlfriend, his sister. Every moment they spent together was hurting her, and it destroyed Albus to even think about it, but he couldn’t control himself.

“B-but Lily,” he stammered, his eyes widening as he lifted his head to look at the other, just as he felt himself being pulled closer. His initial instinct was to pull away, but ultimately he gave up, a small sigh escaping his lips as he slowly squeezed his eyes shut. “W-we shouldn’t be doing this,” he mumbled, as he gently leaned forward- pressing his lips into Scorpius’. He couldn’t help himself and he hated it.

[albusism]

"Scorpius,” the other’s name escaped his lips with a moan, as he tilted his head back- squeezing his eyes shut as he felt the other’s lips against his neck. The feeling of the other’s lips, sent shivers down his spine as he found himself slowly starting to lose control. It was wrong, he knew it was wrong- and yet he didn’t care. It just felt so good, it felt so right. He and Scorpius belonged together, and he didn’t care if it meant having to sneak around behind Lily’s back.

Except he did care, he cared a lot- he felt terrible for doing this to Lily, she was his sister for merlin’s sake! And he was sleeping with her boyfriend, he was quickly taking James’ role as the world’s worst older brother. And it was eating him alive. “W-we need to stop,” he mumbled, as he placed his arms on the other’s chest gently shoving him back. “W-we can’t do this.”

(( @stingslikeascorpius ))

[albusism]

SCORPIUS:

Scorpius settled on trying to keep his breathing steady once again as he watched Albus scribble onto a scrap of parchment and find a student to deliver the letter, feeling grateful for his presence. He wasn’t sure what he would’ve done if he’d woken up and had to deal with all of this alone.

He tried to think back to everything he remembered, tried to connect the dots in his head…being put to sleep after being taken into the forest….being told he was part of a task…..working on assignments in his room and listening to Orion ramble on about that boy of his…….owling his dad……..class after class……..weeks of guilt over…over – what was it? He shut his eyes tight and tried to remember what had made him feel so terrible. He squeezed Albus’s hand back as he thought and thought, and suddenly it clicked and he couldn’t help but gasp aloud.

“Lily! Did they – is she – is she still missing?” He said, looking back up at Albus with stricken eyes. He wasn’t sure what he wanted the answer to be. If she was back…she might be like Marian but if she was still missing that meant she was likely still suffering.

He was still feeling disoriented, and the leftover hurt from remembering his mother’s death all over again was still fresh in his chest, but he was starting to feel a lot better, although disoriented. He shot Albus a tiny smile, as another faint memory from his time in his coma washed over him. “Were you…reading to me? I might have imagined it but I swear I could hear your voice.”

Albus Potter felt like he was going to be sick, correction he wanted to be sick, perhaps then he would have an excuse to run away and never come back. His mouth was dry, his throat sore, sweat was forming on the back of his neck and his palms were clammy. And yet- he stayed, he sucked it up for Scorpius. His best friend needed him, he couldn’t abandon him now. Even though he so desperately wanted to. 

Everything was a mess, his entire world already fragile was finally starting to crumble to pieces. Scorpius was alive- that was good, but everything else was chaotic. And it was his fault, if only he had taken a moment to think before he had acted, then he wouldn’t have kissed his friend and they wouldn’t be sitting there in awkward silence. He wanted to forget about it, he wanted to pretend that it had never happened. But he couldn’t- every time he glanced at the other male he thought about how his lips had felt against his. They were gentle, surprisingly soft and the worst part of it was how right they felt against his. It was like their lips were meant to be together, but he couldn’t say that. 

He wasn’t sure about many things, but if there was one thing that he was sure about it was that kissing Scorpius felt right. He only wished it had been in a better context, and that perhaps his friend would have returned the kiss. But that- was something he would just have to hope for. For now, he would just hope that his friend wouldn’t address the situation. For he knew if he did, he wouldn’t be able to control himself. 

And then, Scorpius mentioned Lily and the last bit of happiness he had disappeared. He should have known he would have asked sooner or later, he should have been prepared for it. But he wasn’t. Albus had been far too worried about Scorpius to even think about Lily. His sister. Some brother he was, forgetting about his missing sister because he was too preoccupied by her boyfriend. He was awful. 

The boy opened his mouth to speak, but the words didn’t come out- he didn’t know what to say. So instead he nodded, his gaze falling to the floor as he bit down on his lip. Lily was still missing, and besides the other kidnapping, they hadn’t heard anything in months. The other kidnapping. It had happened after the task, which meant Scorpius had no idea about it. It also meant that someone needed to tell him. And that was a job that would most likely fall on Albus. But he would wait, find a way to mention it some other time.

Avoiding the subject was a poor choice, one that he was fully aware of but the Hufflepuff didn’t care. He didn’t have the heart, the energy to talk about it anymore. Still chewing on his lip, he slowly lifted his head, his gaze falling on Scorpius once more. He let out a sigh of relief as his friend shifted the conversation to reading. 

Everyone had told him it was a foolish idea to read to Scorpius, and deep down Albus knew that it probably was. But he hadn’t cared- it felt right, like the only thing he could truly do to help. Scorpius loved reading, and since he was unable to read himself- Albus did it for him. He was surprised to hear that the other had heard him, but also pleased with himself and for the first time in what felt like an eternity he smiled. “Y-you could hear me?” he asked, once more biting down on his lip. 

[albusism]

SCORPIUS:

Scorpius felt aware enough to attempt to push himself up a little so that he could drink the water before spilling it all over himself. He hated how frail and helpless he felt. Drinking water should not have been feeling like a chore. He finally managed to get himself up into a semi-seated position, and thankfully his head hadn’t exploded into more shockwaves of pain. He took the glass from Albus and took a few slow sips.

He practically whimpered, his throat already feeling much better. He couldn’t help but drain the rest of the water, feeling mildly more energized and aware already. He clutched the now-empty glass in his hands and turned back to Albus as he spoke, furrowing his brow at his responses. He tried to follow along with his words, and as he spoke, the bits and pieces floating in his head started to connect together.  Right. Champions. The tournament. The hippogriff and the girl from Ilvermorny…right. He bit his lip when Albus mentioned  his state afterwards, eyes going wide.

He somehow felt like he’d managed to get even paler from how fast the blood had drained from his face. A coma. He felt his breathing pick up again, and he tightened his grip around the glass to try and keep his panic at bay. He could’ve never woken up. The thought was terrifying. His poor parents. Speaking of his parents, Albus was still talking, moving on to answer his question about their whereabouts. But he wasn’t answering his questions not…really.

His dad. He’d been shouting about recklessness and his safety, Scorpius remembered now. He’d heard it through the fog of – of what he now assumed was his coma. He shuddered a little bit. It’d felt like hearing someone through water, but every time he’d thought he’d gotten close enough to break the surface, he was yanked back down again. “Thanks,” he said gratefully, when  Albus mentioned owling him. He wanted him here.

Especially now that his mom…wasn’t…here….He furrowed his brow as Albus spoke, trying to remember what he meant by ‘what happened’ to her. He thought back to the last time he’d seen her and he couldn’t remember anything sooner than - than, well, after the Christmas of his third year. He froze, the realization suddenly hitting him like a ton of bricks. “She’s dead,” he gasped suddenly, the recognition feeling like a sledgehammer to the chest, and he could tell his voice was edging on hysteria all over again, but he’d somehow managed to forget his own mother’s death…lived in blissful unreality for a few lovely minutes….and now it was all back. Oh Merlin, his mother. “How did I forget that she’s d-dead?!’

Nodding, Albus reached into his school bag, fumbling around for a piece of parchment and a quill. After scribbling a quick note to Scorpius’ father, he bit down on his lip, searching for someone to intrust the note too. Finally he grabbed a hold of a first year and thrust it into their hands along with the command of “Send an owl as soon as you can.” 

Now that the owl was taken care of, Albus was free to turn his attention back to Scorpius. He bit down on his lip as he studied his friend, he’d never been good at reading emotions but it wasn’t difficult to see that the other male was in distress. He would be too, if he woke up from a coma. He couldn’t imagine what Scorpius was going through, and that made it difficult for Albus to know what he was supposed to do. 

He wanted to run, to hide, he just wanted to escape this moment. Filling in the blanks was painful, it forced him to recall things that he’d shoved out of his mind, and he knew it could only be worse for Scorpius. 

Albus bit his lip, his eyes growing wider as he watched his friend. “I’m so sorry Scorpius,” he finally managed to speak, not sure what much he could say. He wasn’t a trained mediwizard, he had no idea how Scorpius could have forgotten something so important. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do, and that was terrifying. He was worried that he’d do something wrong, say the wrong thing, and that’s the last thing he wanted to do. “I-i don’t know,” he stammered, as he slowly shook his head no, his gaze fixed on the floor. Unsure what else to do, he slowly reached out to take his friend’s hand in his own, giving it a gentle squeeze. 

“I-is there anything else you don’t remember?” he finally asked after a long period of silence, biting down on his lip as he lifted his head to gaze at the other male. While he hoped his friend’s memory was otherwise intact, part of Albus hoped his question would steer the conversation away from Scorpius’ mother. It was selfish, he knew that, but he couldn’t handle talking about it, he had been there when she had died, what Scorpius had gone through, and he couldn’t watch it again. 

[albusism]

SCORPIUS:

Scorpius concentrated on just breathing for a little bit. He had such limited energy that he needed to be careful how he exerted it, and he doubted babbling every single question that was currently whirling through his mind would help very much with that. He focused on the feeling of his fingers wrapped around Albus’s, and when he finally felt ready, he let himself answer his friend’s question.

“L-like I was hit in the head with six bludgers or something,” he admitted, quietly. Speaking hurt. He just needed – “Water…please, Al?” He asked, the end of his question going near quiet due to the scratchiness in his throat. How long had it been since he’d had anything to drink? When Albus mentioned getting someone though, he made the mistake of shaking his head – wincing when it sent a spear of splitting pain through his head all over again. “Please don’t leave me,” he managed to gasp out, clenching his teeth as he waited for the pain to subside, a few tears escaping his eyes as he clutched onto Albus’s fingers even harder. He still didn’t know why he was here. If he had to figure that out alone, he’d probably lose it all over again.

When the pain had reduced to a more manageable level, he loosened his grip on his friend’s hand, suddenly feeling embarrassed. Earlier – he’d almost sworn Albus had kissed him but that didn’t make any sense at all. He must have imagined it or something. He wanted to ask for confirmation about it but he didn’t want Albus to be weirded out if it had somehow just been something he’d conjured in his head.

He tilted his head a tiny bit so he could meet Albus’s eyes. “I don’t – what’s going on with me?” He asked, hoarsely. “Where are my parents?” He needed Albus to help him connect the puzzle pieces in his head, line them up and make them make sense.

The brunette bit down on his lip as he watch his friend, trying his best to refrain from panicking, knowing it wouldn’t help their situation. He needed to remain calm, and level headed- for Scorpius’ sake. He was sure his friend would have a lot of questions, and he didn’t need to deal with Albus’ own problems right now, or ever. 

“I can get you water,” he responded with a small nod as he pulled his wand out of his pocket, while he was capable of getting up and filling the glass himself, this seemed easier. “Accio glass,” he mumbled, reaching out to catch the glass as it zoomed towards him. After muttering the brief incantation to fill it with water, he slowly held it out for his friend. Was he supposed to help him drink it? Perhaps he should have gotten a straw? Biitng down on his lip, he watched the other waiting to see his response, letting out a small cry as Scorpius’ grip tightened. 

“I’m not going to leave you,”he whispered in response to his friend’s question, a small, reassuring smile appearing on his face for a few seconds before it disappeared. “Take it easy,” he warned his friend, as he had to refrain from crying out once more, “You need to save your energy.” It pained him to see how much pain Scorpius was in, and he didn’t want him to put himself through anything more than he needed to. 

Biting his lip, Albus used his free hand to run his fingers through his hair as he studied Scorpius. He knew there was a possibility of memory loss, but he didn’t think it would be this extensive. Where was he supposed to begin? “You were held hostage,” he finally spoke, his words slow, “For the task, and it was the champion’s jobs to get their teammates captives out safely,” he explained, skipping most of the details. “And- it wasn’t safe, everyone ended up with some sort of injury, yours was the worst,” he continued, pausing every now and then to collect himself. “You were in a coma,” he finally reached a stopping point, biting down on his lip as he waited for his response.

And that’s when Scorpius asked about his parents, and Albus felt his heart sinking. Did he not remember? It was hard enough telling his friend about what had happened in the forest, there was no way he could tell him that his mom had died over three years ago, he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t handle the weight of it, but he had to. “Your dad was here,” he started to explain, “I can get someone to send him an owl,” he added, as he bit down on his lip. “D-do you really not remember what happened to your mom?” he finally found himself asking, it was a bit more blunt and forward than he intended, but he couldn’t handle continuing to skirt around the subject. 

[albusism]

LILY:

Call her delusional, but Lily was convinced that her arrival manages to alarm her older brother and stopped him from continuing whatever he was doing earlier. For a split second, he manages to burn the parchment before she can get a glimpse on it. A part of her wants to believe that he was being annoying git, trying to cover things up from her. He’s been acting strange since the few months ago, with no particular reason. He bites his lip wasn’t entirely a good sign either. Maybe she needs put an effort to solve this mystery.

“–Don’t tell me that you just burn your homework, accidentally; because I startled you or something..”

She murmured, with a frown marred through her face. She was joking, of course, but not entirely. If he said yes, she might feel bad about it.

As Albus watched his sister, waiting for her reaction to his sudden decision to burn the piece of parchment, he couldn’t help but start to panic. At the time burning the letter had seemed like the logical thing to do, he didn’t want her to see it- not yet. But, what he hadn’t thought about was an explanation for his sudden decision to burn it. He was sure his action wouldn’t go unnoticed- which meant he needed to come up with some sort of reason, an excuse.

Taking a deep breath, he slowly placed the textbook on his lap on the ground next to him, as he lifted his head to look at his sister. “You didn’t startle me,” he spoke slowly, trying his best to behave in a normal manner, which was proving to be difficult. “I just couldn’t get the wording right on this essay,” he explained with a small shrug, hoping it would make sense that he burned the parchment out of frustration. If that didn’t work, he wasn’t sure what he’d do next- but he knew he wouldn’t tell her about the letter, he couldn’t tell her about the letter.

“Do you need something?” he asked, his usual amount of impatience returning to his voice. While he didn’t mean to come off as rude, it was a defense mechanism he’d adapted, and by the time he realized what he’d said, it was too late to take it back. But perhaps his rude behavior would be enough to send her way. “You usually don’t venture to this part of the castle,” he quickly added, trying ever so hard to cover his tracks.

[albusism]

SCORPIUS:

Scorpius’s incessant panic was cut short with the feeling of warm, if not slightly chapped lips pressing themselves to his. His eyes opened once more and he was startled when he realized it was Albus. His Albus. His best friend Albus Potter. He gasped, when Albus pulled back, and then shut his eyes again, the pain in his head still making every movement feel like a chore. He finally managed to get his ragged breathing under control long enough to speak. Dimly he wished his arms didn’t feel so heavy. He sort of wanted to touch his lips, make sure they hadn’t suddenly disappeared.

“A-Al?” He mumbled, blinking his eyes back open. He scrunched his nose up. He still didn’t know what he was going on or why he was here. “Wh-what’s – “ he stopped, abruptly. “I’m not d-dead am I?” He asked hoarsely, a hysterical tinge lifting up the end of the question. He needed water, he needed his mom, he needed – answers, mostly.

Dimly, flashes of things were coming back to him: a forest, a - a beast, of sorts that had a beak or something similar, the sound of his dad’s yelling, angry and scared all at once, Albus’s soothing voice telling him stories. They all felt like pieces of a puzzle that he still hadn’t managed to fit together properly. Trying to fit them together was making him feel ill. The longer he was awake though, the more the heaviness that was making moving seem exhausting seemed to dissipate, and he finally had enough strength to curl two of his fingers around one of Al’s, needing the sensation to keep him grounded as he tried to figure out what was going on.

Albus wanted to cry, in fact it was taking every inch of his remaining self control to hold back the tears that were starting to form in his eyes. How could he be so stupid! He had kissed Scorpius! What if someone had seen it? How on Earth was he supposed to explain why he had kissed his best friend, his sister’s boyfriend? Especially when he couldn’t even begin to process it- he had no idea what had come over him, one minute he was just overjoyed to see his friend was awake and the next his lips were pressed against his! 

It took a while for the brunette to collect his thoughts, to calm himself down to the point of where he felt capable of responding to his friend. He wanted nothing more than to just run away, and pretend that this moment had never happened. But that wouldn’t be fair of him, so he’d settle for hoping Scorpius would just forget about it. 

“You’re not dead,” he finally responded, a small smile working it’s way across his face as the words left his mouth. It felt great to say it, it felt great to see his friend alive and well. He had spent ages worrying about his friend, worrying that he wasn’t going to be okay, and there he was- awake and talking to him. 

Quickly looking around, he reached back with his leg, hooking his foot around one of the chairs as he pulled it towards him, taking a seat next to his friend. “Take it easy,” he whispered, biting down on his lip once more as he felt the other grab ahold of his finger, he didn’t fight it, instead he gently rested his hand on the mattress. “How are you feeling?” he finally asked, after what felt like an eternity of silence. It was a dumb question, and he regretted it as soon as the words left his mouth, but by then it was far too late to take it back. “Do you need anything? Water? Or would you like me to get someone?” he found himself continuing to ramble on, hoping that if he continued to talk his friend might forget about the kiss. 

[albusism]

Love is all that I can give to you      Love is more than just a game for two           Two in love can make it                Take my heart and please don't break it                    Love was made for me and you

listen   @stingslikeascorpius

[albusism]

SCORPIUS:

The first thing Scorpius registered when his eyes fluttered open was how white everything was, the bright lights in his eyes blinding him to anything else. He squinted, groaning, as a splitting pain shot through his entire body, making him feel nauseous all of a sudden. Where was he? What was going on? His throat was burning, like he’d been lost in a desert for weeks, and he still couldn’t see, and now he felt like he couldn’t breathe either. He tried to move, but lifting his limbs felt like he was dragging them through slowly solidifying concrete.

He finally managed to gasp out a soft, pained noise, and he hiccuped on a sob, feeling scared and confused and lost all at once. He wanted his mom. He wanted her arms around him and the comforting, floral scent of her perfume, that always managed to cling to her clothes and anything she touched. He wanted her and he wanted to know where he was or why he felt like moving would sap him of any of his remaining energy and he wanted to know why his head felt like someone had taken a beater bat to it repeatedly. He realized, through his panic, that someone was at his bedside, but he was too afraid to do anything other than let out, shaky, half-sobs of breath.

In the days that had followed after the task, Albus’s presence at Scorpius’s bedside had been a constant, the Hufflepuff had only left long enough to car for their respective pets, and to change his clothes. Otherwise he was glued to his friend’s side, anxiously waiting for him to wake up. At first various people had tried talking to him, suggesting that he aught to get some rest- but they gave up once it became clear that Albus wasn’t going anywhere. At first he had just sat there, a worried expression on his face, tears in his eyes as he had listened to the doctors talk. He heard them mention the possibility of Scorpius never waking up, but he refused to believe it, Scorpius had to wake up, he had to. 

As the first week past, Albus found himself beginning to adapt to spending his days in the hospital wing, learning to tune out everything that went on around them. He’d even begun to read to his friend, he had no idea if Scorpius could hear him, but he liked to think that he could. He tried to read a variety of materials so he wouldn’t bore his friend, the daily prophet remaining one of the only consistent materials. Running out of things to read, Albus began to read the Tales of Beedle the Bard. 

Albus had just reached the part where the three brothers encountered death in the Tale of the Three Brothers when he heard the gasp. Startled, he quickly discarded the book as he turned to look at his friend, letting out a small cry as he realized his friend was awake. The next thing he knew, Albus was leaning forward, pressing his lips against his friend’s. He didn’t know what had come over him, but upon seeing that his friend was awake he was overcome with a feeling of joy. His lips lingered for a few seconds, before the realization of what he had done sat in, and he quickly pulled back. “I am so sorry!” he cried, his tone becoming frantic as he quickly looked around to see if anyone had noticed. 

[albusism]

LILY:

Friday, October 13th, 2023

Two hours of working on her Arithmancy essay with Dominique in the library was quite an experience, as though they can no longer write anything without feeling the dull-ache that starts to grow in their hand. Lily even convince that she’ll break her hand at some point if they don’t stop immediately. After a quick exchange of parting words, the redhead excuse herself to the Kitchen, before finally catch up with her cousin later on her way to their next class. It’s still too early to wait for the lunch time, yet she’s already starved herself to death.

A few secret passages later, she finally reached the basement. Quite a contrary to the usual, the hallway that was usually filled by bustling students, now looked rather empty with only one person – she can easily rule out as her older brother – occupying one corner. At least, it’s someone she knew and not another stranger who will force her to get involved into another meaningless small talk.

“–Al..?”

@albusisms

Albus Severus Potter was not in the best mood, after being forced to evacuate his common room after someone had accidentally sat off some sort of stink bomb, he had retreated to one of the basement corridors where he now sat working on an essay. It was a less than ideal location for doing his homework, but it was looking like it’d be his only option unless he wanted to venture into the castle. Besides, he wasn’t really doing his homework, his mind was far too preoccupied by other things, namely his sister, and her boyfriend- his best friend.

When they had started dating, Albus told them it was okay- something he’d regretted ever since. He had just wanted them to be happy, and he hadn’t stopped to think if it would make him happy. And clearly it didn’t, it pained him, seeing his best friend, the boy he loved- dating his sister. Yet he did nothing about it, until now. Finally, he’d managed to wake the inner Gryffindor lurking inside of him, and he’d decided to say something about it.

But, still too much of a coward he had resulted to writing a letter. A stupid method, but perhaps, he would read it aloud. He wasn’t sure, he just knew he had to do something. As he wrote, Albus found himself pouring his feelings into the letter and he was startled to hear his sister’s voice. Panicking, he managed to pull out his wand and mumble “Incendio,” watching as the the parchment crumbled to ashes, quickly brushing them away as he looked up at his sister. “Yeah, Lils?” he asked, biting down on his lip.

[greengrassweasley-blog]

[albusism]

greengrassweasley:

THE WOTTER FAMILY TREE as it would appear in 2035

for the love of god, click here for better reading quality

( if you decide to kill of your character by 2035 or you’ve worked out some kind of marriage/kids situation lmk and I’ll add it )

[albusism]

JAMES:

———— ❝ no, you’re not. ❞ james admitted with a small nod, gaze falling upon his younger brother’s figure. ❝ but you’ll always be one to me. and i’m not saying it to tease you, believe me. ❞ something was very wrong with albus, by then james was certain of it, ‘cause the younger boy would not miss an opportunity to further contradict his older brother. but james couldn’t quite put his finger on the problem and it killed him. al had never seemed so small, huddled up with his knees to his chest and eyes focused on the floor like he was afraid to look up — it broke james’ heart. ❝ i know you think i don’t give a shit and i can understand why — i haven’t really been doing this whole ‘older brother’ thing right — but i do care. i just … ❞ the lion paused, thinking about the proper way to put his thoughts into a coherent sentence. ❝ i’m bad at showing it. ❞ he eventually concluded. ❝ you two always seemed to be doing better without me anyway. i feel like i’m just in the way sometimes, that extra kid who makes all the others look bad by being associated with them. ❞ once he concluded his rant, the older boy exhaled sharply, rubbing his temples with the tips of his fingers. he wasn’t sure what else to say, how to get his brother to open up, so the lion sat there, silently, eyes focused on the vast body of water before him. ❝ i should have been the one to disappear — and never come back again. ❞ james spoke again after the long pause. ❝ it should have been me. ❞ 

Albus couldn’t help but roll his eyes as James began to talk about being an older brother, but he stayed silent- deciding his words would be wasted on pointing out all the times he had been let down. He could see that his brother was painfully aware of how awful he was at being a brother, but that didn’t change anything- and apologizing for it certainly wouldn’t. Changing how he acted might be enough to redeem himself, but the younger Potter highly doubted his brother had it in him. So he decided to try putting it behind him, but as James spoke and the words coming out of his mouth continued to be about himself, Albus found himself becoming angry. Of course James would find away to make this about him, he always did. “You really know how to make everything about you,” when Albus finally spoke his words were chosen carefully and delivered in a slow manner, emphasizing each and every syllable in an attempt to make a punch. By now it was clear that the younger male was angry, perhaps even furious with his brother. Perhaps he wasn’t being fair, certainly James wasn’t alone in wishing he was the one who had been taken, but Albus was sick and tired of the pity. And more than that, he was angry at himself which translated to him taking said anger out on the nearest person, which just so happened to be James. “You’re right though,” he added, speaking slowly as he lifted his head to look at his brother, “It should have been you,” he continued- his words escaping from his mouth without much thought. Because if he had taken even a few seconds longer to think this through, he wouldn’t have said it. “Lily was going places, while you seem to be on track to be a seventh year for the third time,” he finished with a small tsk, as he folded his arms across his chest. He was waiting to see how James would react, he hoped his words would ignite a fire inside of his brother. Not because he enjoyed seeing him angry, but because he hoped that anger would translate into physical violence. Albus still felt numb inside, and he longed for something to make him feel- and this was the perfect opportunity. 

[albusism]

SELENA:

No matter what the results, Selena was going to cheer for Brynn. She couldn’t imagine the fear, anxiety, and danger that followed her throughout the Forest. She hated that she and Ambrose were stuck on the sidelines while Brynn did all the hard work. When the crowd went silent as someone appeared at the edge of the Forest, Selena sprinted past the barriers trying to see who it was. At first glance, her heart swelled with pride that it was Brynn standing there with what was someone slumped in her arms. She pushed against the professors, who seemed rigid with fear, as she ran to help her teammate to safety. Visions of celebrating their victory were quickly replace with a scene straight from her nightmares. His platinum hair matted with blood, his body limp, and his eyes were thin slits. She didn’t register the scream that affirmed the professors’ greatest fears. Her legs became dead weight that pulled her down on her knees as the Mediwitches shoved past her. “N-no! N-not him!” she screamed until it was nothing but a hoarse whisper, tears falling down her face. Her walls, the walls that held her up throughout the tournament had collapsed. It was if her body thought that the tears would help wash the blood out of his hair. 

Albus hated this- the task, knowing that their were students tied up in the forest, unable to protect themselves. He hated the entire tournament, he knew the story of what had happened the last time the Triwizard Tournament had taken place like the back of his hand and he was worried, correction he was terrified. His worries had only grown when he took his seat in the stands and realized that James and Scorpius were no where to be found. He had remained on the edge of his seat the remainder of the task, his hands clenched into fists, his finger nails digging into his palms. He was terrified- what if something happened to them? He’d already lost his sister, he couldn’t lose his brother or best friend. And then- everything changed. He heard the crowd erupt in cheers as the champions emerged from the forest, but it wasn’t right, his eyes immediately landed on Brynn who was carrying a limp, nearly lifeless form in her arms. And his heart sank the moment he saw the platinum blond hair, a cry escaping his lips as he made his way to his feet, pushing through the crowd. He could feel people trying to hold him back, but he fought them off, he had to get to Scorpius, he needed to get to Scorpius. He wasn’t sure what happened, but he found himself next to Selena, and he instinctively wrapped his arms around her. “H-he’ll be okay,” he croaked, trying to reassure himself just as much as he was trying to reassure Selena, “He’s strong, he’ll be okay.”

[albusism]

ORION:

      Once Albus was down in front of him, his little flash wasn’t enough, since Orion peeled his shirt once more to get a better look. Letting his hands graze against Albus’ skin, looking for any abnormal abrations and markings he should report back to Madame Abbott, he listened breifly. However when inspecting, the moment Albus decided to make sly remarks about Valentino—his emotions took precedent over his bedside manner. His finger jabbed into one of the markings where scaring was inevitable. “Sorry.” he said swiftly after, pulling back as he inspected him enough. He wasn’t sure why Albus got under his skin like that, Valentino promised him it was all for face, yet his remark about kissing made him worried or wondered what Scorpius had told him. 

      “Yes it’s with Val and for the record, I’m not sure what you’ve heard but we do more than that.” they did but it was still Orion’s favorite. Huffing a bit to himself, Orion slung his bag over his shoulder to his waist, as he looked for the draughts. “But as you and I aren’t really friends, via only civil cause of Scorpius lets refrain like you give a damn about what I do….outside than me being your care-taker.” shaking his head, he lifted the two bottles and offered them to him. “Take this at night, along with the other dosages you have. It’ll help the healing and maybe improve your chances of scaring….Okay?” 

Albus’ eyes narrowed as he watched Orion, his hands falling to his sides as the other pulled his shirt back. He didn’t like being so exposed in such an open space, but based on how their conversation was going, he knew Orion wouldn’t care about that. It took all of his will power not to cry out as the other gave him a rather forceful jab, something he found to be rather unnecessary. “No problem,” he muttered, his eyes narrowing as he watched the other male. He wanted to threaten him, to retaliate but both of them knew full well he wouldn’t uphold a threat. But the satisfaction of casting a bat bogey spell would be so nice, perhaps he aught to do it. 

“To each his own,” Albus responded with a small shrug of his shoulders, while it pained him to think of Orion being intimate which someone as awful as Valentino he didn’t say anything. “I’d worry about catching something if I were you,” the comment was off-hand and completely made up, but part of Albus hoped it would get Orion to reconsider things. “You’re right- I don’t give a damn about you,” he admitted with a small laugh, it wasn’t true- but he was annoyed, and it felt nice to say it. “Thanks,” he mumbled, as he grabbed the bottles from the other male, quickly shoving them in the pocket of his robe, before beginning to button his shirt. 

[albusism]

SCORPIUS:

“Thank you.” It was nice knowing that someone thought he was kind of cool and confident. Scorpius didn’t know how Albus looked at his dorky, awkward, anxious self and thought so but he certainly wasn’t going to complain. He perked up as Albus started to talk about their trip. Their trip. It felt real now. He suddenly couldn’t wait to start planning it in earnest. “It’ll be wonderful,” he murmured in agreement.

He nodded when Albus said his pyjamas would be fine, and turned away to give his friend some privacy, his ears going a little bit red again when he heard the clink of Albus’s belt buckle. Once Scorpius had gathered all his discarded clothes, he folded them by hand, not bothering to go retrieve his wand, and then tucked them back away. He tugged off his dress pants and pulled on his matching pyjama pants, before folding up the other pair and tucking them away with the rest of his dress robes.

Before he could pull his shirt on, he heard Albus yelp and he turned around in time to see his friend hit his head on the side of the bed. His heart dropped and he immediately rushed over, swearing under his breath. He carefully cradled Albus’s head in his hands checking him over to see if he was bleeding and let out a sigh of relief when he was sure he wasn’t. He also pressed his fingers to his neck to make sure his heart rate was still normal and made sure he was still breathing. He also checked his neck and spine but everything seemed fine there so he didn’t think it would be bad if he moved Albus somewhere more comfortable. He tucked his hands under Albus’s arms and managed to pull him up and onto the bed, laying him flat and hovering over him anxiously, his heart thudding loudly in his ears.

“Al, Al, please wake up,” he murmured, pushing his friend’s hair out of his face and biting his lip, trying to quell his panic. If he didn’t wake up soon, he’d go alert someone at the hospital wing, he decided mentally. In the meanwhile, he couldn’t stop anxiously running his fingers through Albus’s hair, as if that would somehow coax him back awake.

A few minutes passed, before Albus groaned, his eyes slowly fluttering open- to see a rather blurry image of Scorpius hovering over him. He blinked a few times, until his friend came into focus. “W-what happened?” he asked, squeezing his eyes shut as a searing pain shot through his head. The Hufflepuff vaguely remembered changing into a pair of pajamas, but he couldn’t recall what had happened afterwards. But based on the considerable amount of pain running through his head, he assumed he must have hit his head. Biting his lip, he turned his head so he was able to watch his friend as he eagerly waited for an answer. In order to avoid panicking, he began to take several deep breaths. 

[albusism]

DOMINIQUE:

“I’m trying!” She told him trying to keep her voice shy of a scream. It wasn’t like she wasn’t trying. All she had been doing for the past hour or so was trying. For whatever reason it just seemed like it didn’t want to happen. So much so she was happy to do other kinds of magic that would work for her. All things considered, it was awful hard to focus on being happy when there was so much going on.

Instead, she bit down on her lip and closed her eyes, trying to focus on that happy place. The one that made her think of sunshine and happier times. “Expecto Patronus…” She muttered again as she opened her eyes hoping to see more of a shape this time. The puffs of smoke always seemed almost cat like but she hardly had time to distinguish it before it vanished in another puff of white.

Sighing, she decided to try something else. Maybe a different memory? But which one? When she had selected a different one she tried again. This time she noticed a flick of a long time before the shape dissolved into nothing for the third time. “Don’t even say it,” she told her cousin knowing he was going to lecture her again for not trying hard enough. His frustration was starting to rub off on her. “Do you think on the memory itself or the feeling of happiness?”

“Well, you’re not trying hard enough!” Albus responded, his voice raising as he felt his temperature starting to rise. He was frustrated and he was taking it out on Dominique because she was there, and it was easy. “Otherwise you would have done it already!” he continued, as he threw his arms out to his sides. He needed to calm down, but the chances of that happening were growing slimmer by the second.

Letting out a loud, frustrated sigh Albus angrily ran his fingers through his hair, his eyes narrowing as he watched his cousin. Perhaps she wasn’t doing anything wrong, there was the possibility that Dominique just wasn’t able to produce a patronus. But- it was too early to be sure about that, which meant she needed to continue practicing the spell. “The memory,” he responded, throwing up his hands once more. “You need to be thinking of something happy, and it needs to be strong,” he explained, for what felt like the million time as he took a step towards his cousin, “And you need to be confident- you won’t get anywhere if you tell yourself it’s too hard or that you can’t do it.”

[albusism]

SCORPIUS:

Scorpius turned to look at him, surprised. He couldn’t help it. Scorpius was confident in things he could control, maybe, like his school work, or the path from point A to point B to achieve his goals, but when it came to himself? He didn’t feel confident at all. If he could rewire parts of himself to make them run better, he’d do it in an instant. “Am I? It doesn’t feel that way.”

His eyes lit up when Albus agreed to his idea. It had felt foolish only moments ago but now he was excited all over again, already mentally starting to catalog what they would need and where they could go. “Me too. We can see some more of the world than this dreary place.” He bumped his shoulder back against his, happy to see his friend smiling again as he continued to imagine what travelling with Albus at his side would be like. He practically shivered in excitement when he thought about all the museums they could go see.

He nodded in response to the question, Al’s voice pulling him out of his thoughts, and he stood up. His own formal clothes were starting to feel constricting so changing out of them sounded like a splendid idea. He rummaged through one of his drawer’s for a moment before pulling out a a pair of blue and gold pajamas, tossing them onto the bed for his friend. “They might be a little long but… I can probably sever them if they start to annoy you,” he said.

He pulled out a second pair of pajamas for himself, this time in emerald green, and set them on the bed, undoing the buttons on his shirt and shrugging out of his top, crossing over to the other side of the bed to retrieve the jacket he’d abandoned when he’d gotten in. He shivered a little bit, the air feeling cold on his bare skin. 

”You are,” the brunette reassured his friend with an eager nod of his head, he could see why he might not think so but he felt it was important to let Scorpius know that not everyone saw him in that light. He couldn’t help but laugh as he began to think of all they could see and do on their year off- they could travel to the furthest corner of the world, see things they’d only dreamed of. It would be amazing. “We could see everything-” he mused, it was an exaggeration but at this moment he didn’t care. 

Albus bit his lip as he slowly stood up, discarding his dress robes before he began to unbutton his shirt. As he shed his shirt, the brunette turned away from his friend in order to hide the curse wounds scattered across his chest. While they weren’t nearly as bad as they had been, he wasn’t eager to show them off. Reaching down, he grabbed the pajama top and quickly pulled it over his head. “They should be fine,” Albus responded with a small laugh, as he undid his belt, and stepped out of his pants.

His eyes widened as he caught a glimpse of Scorpius’ shirtless form moving across the room- his eyes lingering as he watched his friend retrieve his jacket. Biting his lip, he quickly looked away as he reached down to grab the pair of pants. After pulling the pants on, he found that they were indeed several inches too long but he shrugged it off, after all he just had to wear them to sleep. Tugging at the waistband, he took a step towards the bed. 

At some point, he must have managed to step on the excess material for the next thing he knew he was falling forward. He let out a startled yelp as he stuck out his arms to brace his fall, Unfortunately in the process, his head hit the corner of the bed frame and he let out a small cry before crumpling to a heap on the floor.