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@aldendrake-author
I'm posting my debut novel for free!
Money is cool and all, but at this point I just want people to read (and hopefully love and share) my work, so I'm gonna be posting my debut novel here, one chapter at a time. If you love queer fantasy romance and are looking for a unique story full of hurt/comfort, perseverance, and deep love, consider checking out my first novel Soul of Solace.
(TOC under the “Keep reading”)
Was so delighted by that fanart that I had to draw a thank-you for it (featuring Shade and Asim, their tabaxi) 🎨❤️
I received my first fanart for "Soul of Solace," featuring Shade from my book and this person's Tabaxi, I'm so touched 😭
Big Claw Bros, indeed ❤️
I'm posting my debut novel for free!
Money is cool and all, but at this point I just want people to read (and hopefully love and share) my work, so I'm gonna be posting my debut novel here, one chapter at a time. If you love queer fantasy romance and are looking for a unique story full of hurt/comfort, perseverance, and deep love, consider checking out my first novel Soul of Solace.
It's my birthday (and this is fully posted) so I'm reblogging for a fresh set of eyes! 🎉
Soul of Solace: Bonus Chapter
Table of Contents
<- Epilogue
Bonus Chapter
Athaeÿn
*** NSFW contains explicit sexual content ***
Shade groaned in the hallway outside our living quarters. “I ate too much bread.”
A chuckle slipped out as I unlocked the front door. “You can eat an entire deer in less than a day but can’t handle ten loaves of bread in one sitting?”
“My stomach prefers meat, but I dream of bread. I must consume as much as possible.”
Once we entered, I closed and locked the door behind us. “And you make good on that every time we go out to eat. Every single time. You never learn.”
“Hey, I could only eat bread one month a year for a thousand years. I have a lot of making up to do, especially if butter is involved. Besides, I had an excuse this time.”
“Conversing with my parents is not an excuse to shovel bread into your face with reckless abandon.”
“Yes it is. Also, the waitress kept bringing more! It would’ve been rude not to eat it.”
I sighed and glanced at Luna, who was kneading him like a pincushion where he held her against his chest. “And you even had something to occupy your hands this time…”
“The problem is, I have two hands and only need one to pet Luna.”
“Then perhaps we should get a second one to keep both of your hands occupied.”
“We can get more?!”
“Fiella has five, does she not? Additionally, there will be times Luna has to stay home, and I bet she would appreciate having a friend to play with.”
He lifted her up and nuzzled her face. “Did you hear that? You can have a sibling!”
I smiled and patted his arm. “Alright, she’s had a long and overstimulating day. Time for her to go to bed.”
“Can she sleep in our room?”
“Eventually, but we should probably wait until she’s a bit older.”
“Oh, alright…” He kissed her forehead and gently placed her on her bed in the closet, where she circled a few times before snuggling in to sleep. “Goodnight, Luna. See you in the morning,” he whispered, closing the door as quietly as possible. After a moment, he turned back to me and clutched his chest. “She’s so precious.”
“She really is.”
I made my way to our immense master bedroom and sat on the edge of our equally gigantic bed. It looked absolutely ridiculous at twelve-by-twelve feet, but it did a good job supporting Shade’s hulking frame and huge wings. I barely took up any space in comparison.
He followed me in and closed the door behind him. “Speaking of precious, did you see the look on your mother’s face when she heard you still had the lunelight?”
“I did.”
And I’ll never forget it.
My smile slowly faded. “If I can be honest for a moment, I almost wish I hadn’t let you give your gift until tomorrow.”
“What do you mean? You were thrilled to see your parents.”
“That’s exactly the problem. How can reuniting with them after three hundred years possibly compare to giving you a kitten?”
He blinked at me a few times. “You’ve seen how much I love her, right?”
“And I’m so glad you do, but it’s not the same. No offense to Luna, of course.”
“Athaeÿn, it’s not—”
“A competition. I know…” I shook my head and frowned at the floor. “But this was supposed to be your special day, not mine.”
He came over and sat next to me on the edge of the bed. “It can still be my special day without being all about me.”
Without looking at him, I nodded a little and hung my head. “I’m sorry, Shade, I’m not trying to sound ungrateful. I just wanted you to be the happiest person in the whole world today, and…” I sighed heavily. “And I also wanted to be the best gift-giver, not the other way around. That probably sounds selfish…”
“Hmm, maybe, but not really. It’s not like you sabotaged everyone else so your gift would be the only one. Now that would be selfish.”
I exhaled sharply with amusement but otherwise remained silent.
“Your happiness is my happiness, so the reunion with your parents just made my birthday that much better.” He pulled me into a side hug. “If anything, I’m the one who has to overcompensate.”
“Why?”
“Because you sacrificed yourself to save my soul. I don’t think I can ever top that,” he put on a tiny smirk and shook me a little, “so let me do nice things for you.”
I couldn’t help but laugh as he jostled me back and forth. When the motion stopped, I was left with a bashful smile. “I guess you have a point.”
“I know I do,” he kissed the top of my head, “so, no more feeling inadequate, please.”
One more chuckle slipped out. “Alright… but, since we’re on the subject,” I let my full body weight lean on him, “is there anything else you wanted? It’s still your birthday, after all.”
He tensed for a split second and shook his head. “Nope.”
How convincing.
I finally glanced up at him. “Are you sure?”
“Yep.”
“Absolutely positive?”
“Mm-hmm.”
“Shade, you know you can’t lie to me for shit.”
“I’m not lying.”
“Omission still counts.”
He tensed again but said nothing this time.
Seems we’re finally having this conversation.
I turned slightly to see him better. “Why are you so afraid to talk about this?”
“A-About what?”
“Shade—”
“Alright, alright…” His free hand found mine. “I’m afraid to talk about it for multiple reasons.”
“I’m listening.”
He averted his gaze. “I’m obviously a bit nervous since I’ve never… you know… at least with another person… but I’m more worried about you.”
“Because of Roänach?”
It took a few moments for him to look at me again. “How could I even bring this up after everything he did?”
I could feel the anxiety in his fidgeting claws. “I see… Are those the only reasons?”
“The main ones, but I also had no intention of asking on a day like this. I didn’t want you to feel any obligation or pressure.”
At first, I didn’t know what to say.
He really is too caring for his own good.
A few more seconds passed before I got my mouth to cooperate. “I appreciate the sentiment, truly, but you shouldn’t silence yourself out of fear of upsetting me. As long as you’re considerate, asking questions won’t hurt me the way Roänach did.”
“Maybe, but there’s one more reason I never said anything.” His gaze fell to our clasped hands. “I love what we already have. Wanting to go further with you is a desire, not a need. Considering how much you’ve been hurt, I almost feel bad just thinking about it.” He shook his head a little. “I was waiting for you to bring this up, but if you never did,” he fully enclosed my hand in his and looked into my eyes, “I would have happily let it go.”
I was left speechless again.
He was really willing to do that?
A small wave of guilt forced me to look away. “Shhhhit…”
“What’s wrong?”
“I was actually waiting for you to bring it up first.”
“Wha— Really? Why?”
“I figured you were nervous due to inexperience, and I didn’t want to scare you by suggesting anything. Turns out, my first assumption was correct, but…” I rubbed the back of my neck and smiled awkwardly. “I guess in our mutual desire to be respectful, we accidentally ended up failing to communicate.”
He shook his head and let out a heavy breath. “Shit— I’m sorry, Athaeÿn. I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
“Me neither, so I’m sorry too.”
“Ughhhh…” He dragged his hands down his face and flopped backward on the bed. “I’m such an idiot,” he groaned into his palms.
I nestled in the crook of his shoulder and rested my head on his chest. “You and I both.”
He kept his face covered and shook his head a few more times. Eventually, he let his hands fall away but draped one arm over me. “I know you were trying to be mindful, but if you were open to this the whole time, why not at least mention it in passing so I knew?”
“I could ask you the same thing.”
“Could you, though? Our concerns aren’t really on equal footing.”
“Says who?”
“Common sense.”
I turned my head a bit. “What about your claim is common sense?”
“My nervous inexperience doesn’t even come close to what you went through.”
“And, therefore, your fear doesn’t matter?”
“It matters, just way less than what you’ve actually suffered.”
“You hear how absurd that sounds, right?”
“I don’t think it sounds absurd.”
With a slight grunt of effort, I turned over and propped myself up so I could see his face. “Why are you downplaying the significance of your feelings?”
“Why are you pushing back so much?” His tone was solid, but his expression didn’t match. “Look, all I’m saying is your lived experiences carry more weight than my fear of probably nothing. Doesn’t that make at least some sense?”
After mulling over his stance, I shook my head at myself. “I’m sorry, absurd was a strong word. I understand where you’re coming from, but my point is both sides matter equally, even if one seems less important. It’s just…” I sighed and shook my head again. “I prioritized the needs of others for so long I nearly forgot about my own. I don’t want you falling into the same trap.”
His eyes widened a bit, but he kept quiet to listen.
I leaned closer and softened my voice. “Please don’t do what I did.”
You deserve better.
Eventually, he offered a small smile. “Okay.”
“Promise me.”
“I overthink too much to promise, but I’ll try.”
“Hmm… I suppose I can accept such an honest response.”
He held the back of my head with one hand. “I’ll do my best as long as you promise to do the same.”
I returned a half-lidded smile. “Deal.”
As we shared a deep kiss, I hummed contentedly when his fingers got lost in my hair. It was one of my favorite things he did.
And I never even have to ask.
I broke the kiss a full minute later. “So, would you like to change your answer to the birthday present question?”
“Only if you want the same thing.”
“I do.”
He nodded a little. “I’m still nervous.”
“For you or me?”
“Yes.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle. “Let’s start with you.”
“I’ll be alright. Really. My nerves aren’t even that bad. It’s your feeling of safety I’m worried about.”
“You make me feel safe.”
He opened his mouth but closed it again without saying anything.
My turn…
I tilted my head and slowly caressed his jawline. “I never thought I’d recover the ability to touch. The spa has helped tremendously, but it all started with you. I want to prove it.”
He shivered a little. “You already have.”
“Not nearly as much as I’d like.”
“What about Roänach?”
“It’s possible unwelcome memories of him will surface, but I’m confident your presence will drown them out.” I offered a reassuring smile. “We can always stop if something becomes too much, but I’m not worried. Everything about you is my sanctuary.”
He failed to say anything, but his pounding heart spoke for him.
I took the opportunity to slowly drag my lips across his cheek and pause at the corner of his mouth. “I want you and only you.”
An intense blush darkened his face. “You’re really good at this.”
“I haven’t even done anything yet.”
“S-Still.”
I smirked and brushed my thumb across his bottom lip. “So… Are we going all the way?”
“I-I think I’d like that.”
“Not good enough. I need explicit consent.”
He let out a short breath and nodded. “I want to go all the way with you. Please.”
Still so adorable.
“The feeling is mutual, my love.” I had barely finished speaking when I kissed him even deeper than before. “Is it alright if I take the lead, at least to start?”
“You actually know what you’re doing, so please do.”
“Thank you. I promise you won’t regret it.”
“I would never regret any attention from you.”
“I know.” I left a playful smooch on his nose before wriggling out of his embrace and gesturing toward the headboard. “Lie down with your head on the pillows.” As he repositioned himself, I slipped off the bed and pulled a small bottle from the top drawer of my bedside table.
“What’s that?”
“Something for later.”
“Wha— How long has that been in there?”
“Quite a while.” I set it on the table for now and began disrobing. “I wasn’t sure we’d ever have this conversation, but I wanted to be prepared just in case.”
Everything will be fine…
Once fully nude, I knelt over his thick tail and removed the custom belt that hid the subtle slit on his pelvis. “You don’t mind a bite so I can participate equally, right?”
“You know I never mind.”
A tiny smirk tugged my lips as I straddled his hips and rested my backside against his bare pelvic shelf. “Do you perhaps secretly enjoy it?”
His lingering blush deepened. “Are you referring to…?”
My grin widened mischievously. “The incident in the cave…”
He gasped and covered his face with both hands. “Noooo, that was so embarrassing!”
“I found it highly amusing.”
“That’s even worse!”
“It’s the opposite of worse.” I pulled his hands down so he had to look at me. “The more I know, the better.”
As we gazed into each other’s eyes, I noted how his rugged good looks were more enticing than ever. He had always been handsome, but it was nice to see recovering symmetry where it had been denied for so long. His stunted horn had caught up to the other, and the rest of his beard had filled in, so evening out his thick mane of raven hair was all that remained. It had already grown a few inches on the previously bare side.
He’s striking, regardless.
My fingers rode the waves of his jagged clavicles as I leaned down and nosed his ear. “I want to learn everything that makes you shiver and moan… if you’ll let me.”
His hips shifted a little. “A-Apparently, your voice is enough.”
“And we’re just getting started. Speaking of my voice,” I pressed a finger to his lips, “let me do the talking for now, but feel free to make as much wordless noise as you want.” I kissed the indent at the base of his neck and smiled when he gasped softly. “I’ve always found it encouraging.”
As I slowly kissed a line up his throat, he shifted his hips again and let slip a quiet whimper when I reached the sharp outline of his larynx.
“Let yourself go,” I murmured, tilting my head and lightly sucking under the corner of his jaw. When I added my tongue and pressed it firmly against his warm skin, there was a wave of satisfaction when it drew a moan under his breath. “That’s it…”
Gods, how I missed enjoying this.
Once I had thoroughly worked that spot, I held his face with one hand and planted the other where his neck met his shoulders. “Beg me to consume you.” When his only response was lightheaded panting, I roughly dragged my thumb across his bottom lip. “Say you want it.”
“Mmnnn—”
“With words.”
“I-I want it—”
Without hesitation, I sank my fangs into the tender area below his jaw and inhaled his intoxicating blood as though I had been starved for weeks, springing my entire body to life with fervor I hadn’t felt in centuries. Invigorating was an understatement.
As for Shade, the sudden puncturing of his skin drew a small yelp of pain that turned into a moan of pleasure. The apparent ecstasy was so intense that he arched his back off the bed and flexed his knees until both feet were sliding back and forth on the sheets. The chaotic sound of shifting fabric was quite amusing.
And reassuring.
I barely noticed when my thumb hooked itself in the corner of his mouth, but the faint whimper and violent shiver the gesture elicited were hard to miss.
Desire never tasted so good.
After indulging for at least a minute, I unclamped my jaw and let out a deep exhale of gratification while lapping up any stray blood on his skin. By the time I knelt upright, the two small wounds had already healed over.
That was even better than expected.
My racing heart left me feeling breathless, but because the latter was nothing I needed to worry about, I was easily distracted by the yearning pulse at the base of my abdomen.
Speaking of which—
I could feel Shade’s arousal pressed against my backside.
Please be something I can manage—
Tucking a stray lock of hair behind my ear, I cranked my head around to see what had emerged. There was a thick, nine inches begging to be touched. It was bigger than most I had tended to, but a rare few had been even larger despite belonging to people much smaller than Shade. Considering his towering stature, I had feared he would be too much to handle. I was elated to discover that wasn’t the case.
Perfect.
I turned back around so I could check on him. “Are you alright?”
He nodded and clapped a hand on his heaving chest. “Phew… Yeah.” His eyes widened a bit. “This is a lot.”
“We can slow down or stop if you want.”
He smiled and shook his head. “It’s a good a lot.”
I returned a smile. “I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself.”
“Are you having fun too?”
“Very much so.”
He glanced at my bedside table. “Is it time for the bottle?”
“Not yet.” Staying low, I shifted backward to feel his excitement slowly drag between my legs. Teasing him got the blush I wanted. “There’s something I want to do first.”
“A-Alright.”
I lounged prone on his tail so my head was right next to his length. “Anything I should know before I continue?”
“What do you mean?”
“Is there anything you don’t want me to do?”
“Oh. Uhh… Nothing comes to mind, so please do whatever you want.”
“Gladly.”
The moment I started stroking him, he dropped his head onto the pillow with a soft thud and let out a deep, elongated groan.
Off to a good start.
I watched my fingers stutter across his thick skin as it tugged and released from the friction. I made sure to be gentle. “How does it compare so far?”
“It’s so much better when someone else is touching it.”
“I’ll be sure to leave a good impression until the end.” Keeping my hand busy, I shifted until my lips hovered right over the tip. After leaving a few kisses, I took him in and pressed my tongue where the head met the shaft. I couldn’t decide whose throbs were more enjoyable.
Shade draped one arm over his face as soon as I got to work. The muscles in his tail were already contracting from the stimulation, and it wasn’t long before his heavy breathing turned into panting. Writhing hips soon followed.
Using his motion, I lowered my head until he slid down the back of my throat.
He sucked in a sharp breath. “F-Fuck—”
I paused for a moment but picked right back up when he groaned with need. His increasingly frequent gasps and moans were music to my ears, but I chose a pace of leisure to savor every inch of him.
I want him to watch.
There was a desperate throb as I released him and patted his hip. “Look at me.”
He didn’t seem to hear me at first. When he finally lowered his arm, it looked like he was lost in a haze of bliss and could barely keep his eyes open.
Good.
Our gazes held as I got back into my rhythm, but I could tell he was already getting close. His struggle to contain involuntary hip thrusts made it obvious. What he didn’t bother stifling were the groans of pleasure reverberating throughout his entire body.
Don’t hold back.
All of a sudden, he shivered and gripped my head with a trembling hand. “A-Athaeÿn, I—” Before he could finish his warning, he choked out an aching moan and was completely overtaken by an orgasm that made his body go rigid but sent the muscles near the base of his tail into a frenzy.
Yes—
I grunted as he pushed my head all the way down without warning, but my shock gave way to satisfaction when my throat received the pulsing flood it had been waiting for. Admittedly, it was handy to remain secured around him as long as I wanted without fear of suffocation.
Seems blood isn’t his only good flavor.
Keeping a tight seal with my lips, I slowly lifted my head and only loosened my hold to leave a kiss on the tip.
Not a single drop wasted.
Meanwhile, Shade just lay there in a breathless daze. “Wow…”
I smirked and knelt upright. “So, my mouth versus your hand.”
“Y-You win. No competition.”
The only correct answer.
Still smiling to myself, I leaned forward a bit and caressed his thighs with both hands. “Should we take a break?”
He shook his head. “I want to make you feel good now.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course.” With a slight grunt of effort, he pushed himself into a sitting position and pulled me into a loving embrace. “It’s my turn to provide.”
My more submissive side had me blushing and wrapping my arms around his neck before he even finished speaking. “I-I guess I can’t argue with that.”
He teased my hip with one claw and murmured against my cheek. “I need explicit consent from you as well.”
Oh gods—
I dug my fingers into his muscular back. “I want you to take me.”
P-Please—
He reassured me with a half-lidded smile. “Anything you wish.”
I shivered with anticipation as he turned and laid me on my back in his previous spot.
Mmm, the sheets are still warm…
Overwhelmed by lust and driven by instinct, I crossed my arms above my head and bent one knee to obscure my hips. Shade had already seen everything, but I wanted him to unveil me this time.
He hummed with desire as he watched. “You really are stunning.”
“You make me feel stunning.”
I’ve never felt so treasured.
The unexpected wave of confidence was exhilarating. “Touch me however you want.”
“But, I— Are you sure?”
“Yes. I want to feel how you look at me.”
The worry in his eyes faded as a smile came to his face. “Just say the word, and I’ll stop.”
“Of course. I trust you wholeheartedly.”
“Thank you.”
I lay perfectly still but felt my heart racing as Shade’s attentive gaze slowly drifted across my body. Patience had already given way to a longing ache, and my chest nearly caught fire when he gently pushed my knee aside to study the rest of me.
Using his thighs to spread my legs, he grinned and slowly dragged his claw in deliberately avoidant circles around what wanted to be touched most. His teasing had my knees shaking sooner than I cared to admit.
I need more—
Eventually, he pressed his thumbs into the soft indents along my hips and slid his hands up my sides. The meticulous pace he chose was torture. “You truly are the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.”
His breathless tone sent another shiver down my spine and left me trembling with need. By the time he eased to a stop under my shoulders and slipped his long fingers behind my back to lock me in place, my heart was threatening to beat out of my chest.
M-More—
As if reading my mind, he drew a soft gasp from my throat the moment his thumbs found and massaged my nipples. The delicate pressure had me quivering and whimpering in his grip, but I outright moaned when he leaned down and sealed his powerful lips over mine. I didn’t bother trying to breathe. I didn’t need air. I just needed him.
Still not enough—
The only thing more palpable than our shared desire was the heat between us, and his ample supply made up for any my body lacked. I didn’t need the sun’s warmth. I just needed Shade’s arms around me.
Need… everything…
All of a sudden, he knelt upright and lifted me by my thighs until I dangled upside down with my hips just below his chin. I was caught off guard but looked up just in time to see a powerful tongue at least a foot long eagerly slither from his mouth and wrap around its prey like a boa constrictor.
Whoa—
His unique tongue and natural skill with it were news to me, but I certainly wasn’t complaining. Quite the opposite, in fact.
G-Gods—
Each increasingly aggressive stroke summoned a moan of equal or greater magnitude. I was already a trembling mess, but when he suddenly took everything into his mouth, I nearly cried out in ecstasy.
Yes—!
Without warning, he abandoned my screaming arousal and left me gasping in shock.
Huh? Wait—
He just grinned and laid me back down as if nothing happened. “Bottle time?”
I-I… uhhh…
My head swam as I lay there panting heavily. Putting my hand on my chest did nothing to steady my frantic heartbeat.
Hold on, can’t think—
Once I managed to settle down and clear my mind, a slightly unrelated thought occurred.
Actually…
I slowly looked up at him. “Would it be alright if we made a small detour?”
“Is something wrong?”
“No, no. Not at all.” My hand drifted to my clavicles. “Can you… Can you touch my neck?”
He stared at me for a few seconds before lowering his gaze to my bite scars.
“You’ve been avoiding it on purpose, haven’t you?”
“N-No. At least, I don’t think so…” He blushed and twiddled his claws. “Maybe…”
I couldn’t help but smile. “Thank you for being considerate.”
He nodded a little and reinstated eye contact. “Are you sure you want me to?”
“I am. Do you not want the same?”
His blush deepened. “I want to touch all of you, but only if you’re absolutely sure.”
“I just said I was.”
“I know, but…”
My gaze fell when he didn’t finish his reply. “Roänach knew my neck was one of my favorite weaknesses. He did everything in his power to take that from me,” I shook my head a little, “and not just with his bite of death.”
But that was definitely the worst…
I looked into Shade’s eyes with unexpected shyness. “I want to love what was lost, and when I feel vulnerable, when I want to feel vulnerable, I don’t want to think about his fangs,” my voice trembled as my fingers ghosted over the puncture marks, “I want to think about you.”
Please do this for me.
After a few seconds of stunned silence, he smiled and pulled me up to his chest.
I was surprised he hadn’t just lowered himself onto me, but I gladly clung to him as he shifted into a sitting position and set me on his lap so we were face-to-face. It was difficult not to melt under the warmth of his loving gaze.
His smile lingered as he leaned his forehead against mine. “I know my touch won’t erase what he did,” he rested his hands on my shoulders and traced my jawline with his thumbs, “but if my love can stay with you in dreams, maybe it can banish nightmares.”
I closed my eyes and took a shaky breath, but it wavered with desire rather than dread. There was nothing to fear when tucked away in Shade’s arms.
It’s the safest place in the whole world.
Eventually, his thumbs dipped lower to massage my delicate neck muscles, but he used the gentle touch of a lover’s caress instead of the bruising force I was used to. His seamless movement continued down the front of my neck, across the divot at the base, and back up to my larynx, only to purposefully bypass it so I had to wait for more. The care in his gesture sent my heart reeling.
It’s working—
He slipped his hands under my shoulders to mimic his earlier hold, but, this time, it was to lean me back so he had more room to tilt his head down. Before I knew what was happening, his lips found my right clavicle.
O-Oh gods—
My hands instinctively gripped his shoulders as he kissed a line up my throat. I kept it together at first, but when he circled back and finally gave my larynx the attention it craved, a desperate moan slipped out before I could contain it.
Don’t stop—
Fortunately, he didn’t, but I “thanked” him by accidentally digging my fingers even deeper into his shoulders.
S-Sorry.
As if hearing my silent apology, he reassured me with a quiet hum against my throat.
Good…
To my delight, his powerful tongue joined his lips in their relentless effort to devour me, making his consuming hunger all the more evident in every heaving breath. I couldn’t get enough.
Finally, after all this time—
My eyes were still closed as I let flow a steady stream of moans and stuttered gasps. It was the only audible begging I could manage in my haze of rapture.
Keep going—
When I choked out a particularly embarrassing whimper, he pressed his face into the soft underside of my jaw with such fervor my head was forcibly tilted back, drawing a yelp of ecstasy from my already aching throat. It was the best kind of ache.
A-Ahh—
By now, my hips were writhing on his lap. Too much.
W-Wait—
I had gotten so worked up I didn’t realize how close I was. Hoping to distract myself, I squeezed his midsection with my thighs and pulled him up into a normal kiss.
N-Not yet—
The delay was successful but left my legs shaking.
Phew…
We were both panting by the time he turned his head to speak. “Everything alright?”
My aching throat tightened. “Better than you could ever know.”
Thank you, Shade.
He just smiled and pulled me into another kiss.
And now, I need all of you.
I pressed my hips forward to feel his desire. There was a lot of it. “Okay,” I grinned against his lips, “it’s finally time for the bottle.”
“It has been waiting rather patiently.”
He laid me back down and poured some of the slippery contents into his hand. It was amusing to watch him gawk at the foreign substance and repeatedly touch his fingers together to make glistening strands.
I probably did the same my first time.
My gaze fell to his arousal. “I look forward to where you take us, but I would appreciate a little more warming up before the main event.”
He lowered himself until his face hovered right over mine. “Already on it.” After a minute or two of rhythmic pressure, he carefully introduced the tip of his middle claw and slipped his tongue into my mouth to stifle the noise we both knew was coming.
Sure enough, I let out a muffled whimper. There was the occasional grunt as his thick finger slowly worked its way deeper and deeper, but relaxing came more easily when his lips found mine and kept my thoughts occupied. Before I knew it, his knuckle made contact.
Fuck—
“Are you alright?”
I nodded as my hands uselessly fumbled against the headboard for something to hold on to. “Wh-What happened to your nerves?”
“Your presence is soothing,” his claw ghosted over an incredibly sensitive area that had me squirming, “and I guess making you feel good is another inherent ability.”
“Y-You have no right being this perfect—”
“I can be as perfect as I want,” he continued massaging the same spot and smirked when I gasped and started thrashing his sides with my knees, “especially if it means pleasing you.”
The only response I could manage was a deep, guttural moan.
Can’t wait any longer—
My hips were trembling by the time I flung my arms around his neck. “I need you to fuck me right now.”
His grin widened as he slowly withdrew his finger. “Your wish is my command.” He retrieved the bottle and applied generous lubrication to both of us. “I’ll try to be gentle.”
“To start, and then I want you to break me.”
He looked a bit surprised but didn’t argue as he settled over me again and slowly pressed forward. Our gazes were locked when the first few inches finally sank in, but he hesitated when I grunted softly and closed my eyes. “You okay?”
I nodded and exhaled deeply.
There was a brief pause before his gentle momentum resumed. This time, he didn’t bother stifling his groans of pleasure.
My hips continuously writhed from the intrusion, but, despite some minor discomfort, I was able to let him in with relative ease. Still, every inch demanded attention, and my chest was heaving by the time our pelvises met. Other than the occasional shiver of bliss, I lay motionless to revel in his fierce throbbing.
I-It’s so much—
Meanwhile, Shade braced himself on his forearms and let out a comically long breath. “Fuck, that feels good…”
I grinned and reopened my eyes. “Everything you hoped for?”
“And then some, but loving you is still the best part.”
Shade—
He locked me in a passionate kiss before I could reply.
Gods, I love this.
My legs were already shaking when they wrapped around his waist. The harder his bulk pressed me into the mattress, the deeper I sank into my sea of euphoria, but my mind was swept away when he fell into a slow thrusting rhythm. We moved as one body.
Yesss—
He started panting into my mouth. “Hypocrite.”
“Wh-What?”
His head dropped next to mine on the pillow. “You’re far more perfect than I am.”
I couldn’t form a single coherent thought, let alone string together a sentence, so I just leaned my head on his and let the compliment hang in the air. Our hips still had yet to separate.
Don’t stop—
My eyes were barely open by the time his pace quickened, but they eventually rolled back when our lovemaking became wild fucking.
P-Please don’t stop—
His violent thrusting sent me into a frenzy of moans and sharp gasps. It felt like the world around us had fallen away, and I clung to him so desperately my fingernails nearly drew blood. I swore my entire being was trying to merge with his.
G-Gods y-y-yesss—
It was now my turn to beg. “Sh-Shade, I w-want— I-I want it. Pl-Please—”
“It’s yours.”
I beat him to it and cried out with an explosive surge of ecstasy, losing all control as my knees spasmed and my body jolted sharply against his chest. The pulsing ache between my legs finally found its long-awaited release.
Shade followed suit with a muffled groan into my neck. Tangling his fingers in my hair, he sank as deep as possible and flooded me with a powerful torrent of heat that left him twitching and whimpering. If he wanted to weigh me down in multiple ways, he had succeeded.
Mmmmmnnnn…
We both went limp at the same time.
That was also worth the wait.
My chest was still heaving when I turned my head and smiled at him. “That was breathtaking, if I do say so myself.”
“I second that.” He returned a smile and caressed my cheek with his thumb. “I’m glad we finally talked about this.”
“Agreed. From now on, please speak up if something’s on your mind.”
“That goes for you too.”
“Of course.” I kissed him softly. “I love you, Shade.”
“And I love you, Athaeÿn.”
End.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
(Thank you so much for reading and I hope you loved it!)
Soul of Solace: Epilogue
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 33
Epilogue
Athaeÿn
Phew, long day…
That didn’t stop me from smiling, if a bit tiredly, as I bid my final client farewell. Once they left, I set about my usual routine of cleaning and organizing my small but cozy massage spa before closing up for the night.
It’s relaxing, honestly.
My days as an escort were over, but I had made enough progress to revive my second favorite service and hone my skills to a professional level. Shade was still the only person I could touch entirely without issue. In the meantime, I was grateful to keep an essence of my original career with a level of intimacy I could handle for everyone else.
In the first few months after returning to Eidolon, I had received expert training, earned my license as a massage therapist, and acquired my spa with just enough help from the queens. Shade had contributed as my enthusiastic practice dummy. It was less than surprising when he begged for a daily massage after learning how good it felt, and I was happy to oblige. His gigantic, muscular body certainly gave me a lot of practice.
And sore hands.
My tired smile turned into a giddy grin as I waited for him to arrive. Without fail, he came to the spa at the end of every workday to walk me out, and today was extra special.
I can’t wait to give him his present.
He finally knew his real birthday, and there weren’t just three Arbiters celebrating. There were five. Galaeÿthe and Haephir had returned to Eidolon to meet the grandson they thought had been murdered. I would never forget the look on Shade’s face when he saw them for the first time.
“They’re as tall as me!”
Their meeting was one of the cutest things I had ever seen, and it was highly amusing to watch them tussle and fly around like playful, adolescent dragons. From their lively antics, one would never know how ancient Galaeÿthe and Haephir were just by looking at them.
They certainly wear their age well.
My reminiscing was interrupted when I heard the front door open, followed by Shade’s distinct footsteps barreling into the waiting room.
There he is—
“Is everyone decent in there?”
I glanced at the closed door separating us. “It’s just me!”
“Same question for just you!”
“You know only the clients disrobe. Besides, you see me undressed all the time.”
“Oh yeah.” He promptly rushed in and made a beeline for me. The moment I was within reach, he snatched me off the ground and squished me against his chest. “I’m so proud of you.”
I wheezed in his tight hug. “F-For what?”
“Your spa and all the massage stuff! I was afraid you would change your mind about everything, so I’m relieved you still love it.”
“Th-Thanks, but you’re crushing me—”
“Oops—” He set me down and smoothed out my clothing. “Sorry about that.”
“It’s alright—” I coughed a few times as my rib cage expanded back to normal. “I think you tell me how proud you are at least once a week.” One final cough ended with a smile. “It’s very thoughtful, but you don’t have to keep saying it if you don’t want to. I know how you feel by now.”
“But I like saying it. Also, you may not notice, but you smile every time. There’s no way I’m saying it less.”
Oh.
I averted my gaze and rubbed the back of my neck. “Well, I wasn’t demanding you stop…” Eventually, I cleared my throat and looked at him again. “Anyway, did you have a good birthday?”
“Yeah! Galaeÿthe and Haephir know so much about everything. I think we spent a few hours just listening to them tell stories.”
“Don’t tell Daryn. He’d probably declare anecdote war on them.”
“I think my grandfathers would win.”
“Definitely don’t tell him that.”
A mischievous grin flashed across his face but left behind a more relaxed smile. “As much fun as I had today, I think I’m even more excited for tomorrow.”
“Yeah, it’ll be nice to have a day for just you and me.”
“Speaking of us, I wasn’t late today, was I?”
“No, why?”
“I stopped at Fiella’s on the way here.”
“Again?”
“Her cats are so cute!” He clutched his chest as if in pain. “I am physically incapable of passing her house without stopping to see them.” A tiny smirk tugged the corner of his mouth. “Sometimes, I even remember to say hi to her and Joryn.”
I just stood there smiling at him.
“What?”
“I think you’re going to like your present.”
His voice became more air than sound. “You didn’t have to get me anything.”
“Nonsense. This is the most important birthday I could ever have the honor of celebrating, and I want it to show. Now, close your eyes.”
“But—”
“Eyes closed.”
He opened his mouth but changed his mind at the last second and did as told.
After waving my hand to make sure he wasn’t peeking, I hurried to and from my small office in record time. On the way back, my footsteps were accompanied by a tiny meow.
Shade froze on the spot. “Wh-What was that?”
“See for yourself.”
He slowly opened his eyes and looked down at me, where I stood holding a tiny kitten with fluffy white fur and brilliant blue eyes. She looked more like a puffball than anything.
Much to my amusement, Shade covered his mouth with both hands and started pattering his feet like an excited kid. Eventually, he dropped to one knee so he was eye level with me and closer to the kitten. He hadn’t looked away from her once.
In a similar vein, I had yet to stop smiling. “Does she remind you of anyone?”
His eyes widened. “She has the same colors as Lune!”
“That’s why I chose her.” I gently set her on his upturned palms and chuckled over how small she was in his massive hands. “This is Luna.”
His smile quivered as he lifted her up to his face. “Hi, Luna.” He teared up a little when she meowed again and nudged his nose with her forehead. “I love her so much.”
My cheeks were starting to hurt from all the smiling, and a familiar surge of warmth didn’t help.
I’m glad you approve, Lune.
As Shade cradled Luna to his chest with one hand, he pulled me in with the other and kissed me deeply. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, love.”
All of a sudden, he got even more excited. “I have a present for you too.”
I snickered under my breath. “That’s not how birthdays work.”
“I know, but I think it’ll make you really happy, which’ll make me really happy. So, uhh, consider it a present from you to me… from me… to you…”
I just stared at him with my hands on my hips.
He added a big, toothy grin.
The corner of my mouth twitched into a half-smile. “Alright, but only because it would be rude to argue on your birthday.”
“Great, let’s go!”
He fled the room with Luna before I could even blink.
Adorable as ever.
My smile widened as I retrieved Luna’s bed from my office and followed Shade outside, making sure to lock up on the way out. The sun had yet to sink below the horizon, but my spa was safely tucked away inside the mountain. Unsurprisingly, many of my clients were other Vampires.
When we reached the citadel, he took us to Daryn’s office instead of our living quarters.
Okay, now I’m really confused.
Shade gently pulled Luna’s bed from my hand and stood aside. “I’m not the only one who should get to spend time with family.”
Wait—
My chest tightened. “What?”
He just smiled and nodded to the door.
I couldn’t tear my gaze from him for a solid ten seconds. When I finally turned and gripped the handle, my hand was shaking violently.
There’s no way—
I stopped breathing and nervously pushed the door open, only to freeze when I spotted two Dark Elves in front of Daryn’s desk. On the opposite side was Daryn himself, Elvylli, and Sathira. All were standing and talking.
Those voices—
When Daryn glanced past his guests and smiled at me, they turned to see what he was looking at.
It can’t be—
The three of us were statues as we stared at each other from across the room.
It’s them—
It took all of my courage to approach.
I-It’s really them—
Tears came to the woman’s eyes the moment I stopped in front of them.
“Athaeÿn?”
My shoulders trembled as she cradled my face with one hand.
Mother—
I leaned into her comforting touch and shifted my gaze to the man. Tears were already streaming down his face as he held my other cheek.
Father—
Without warning, I broke down sobbing and collapsed into them.
Th-They’re here—
I could barely take in enough air to speak. “I-I’m so sorry. Please don’t hate me—”
My mother shook her head and hugged me tightly. “My darling moonlight, we could never.”
“Y-You really didn’t forget me?”
My father kissed my forehead. “Not a day has gone by without thinking of you.” He put his arms around both me and my mother. “Love doesn’t forget.”
All I could do was bury myself in their embrace as if my existence depended on it.
Shade—
Blinded by tears, I managed to glance over my shoulder and discern his silhouette in the open doorway. The moment I could see clearly, I found a loving smile on his face.
Thank you.
Bonus Chapter ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 33
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Athaeÿn
It took Elvylli, Sathira, and Shade numerous trips over multiple days to transport the freed blood captives, other vassals, and remaining Demons to Eidolon. Not all were from the capital, but the queens insisted they get the best help available before going their separate ways.
Daryn and I stayed at Castle Veil while everyone patiently awaited their turns to be whisked away, and he refused to leave until we were the only two left. Even then, I had to convince him I would be fine on my own until Shade came back for me. In the end, reminding him of Roänach’s death was a good enough argument.
Meanwhile, the clouds had the nerve to return in full force the same day they had broken, right before nighttime, of course, which I took personal offense to. I wanted Shade to see the stars in their full glory, but the weather was not cooperating all two hundred miles between Mount Umbra and Eidolon. It was infuriating.
Maybe the gods are having family drama or something.
It certainly wouldn’t be the first time. Whatever the case, I hoped the clouds would go away for my final night at Castle Veil. Seeing the stars again would be a nice send-off.
…
It was early afternoon when Shade arrived one last time. I watched him fly into the cavern from the windowsill of my old room, where I sat playing my zephyr harp I hadn’t seen in almost three centuries. Its obvious neglect saddened me, but I planned to have it fully restored in Eidolon.
I was also going to bring my small portrait and lunelight. Fiella had returned the latter after expressing profuse gratitude for letting her borrow it. I had fully intended to let her keep it, but, admittedly, it was nice to have back.
I’m just glad it helped.
I was still playing my harp when Shade appeared on the threshold. “Look what I found.”
He smiled and awkwardly crammed himself through the doorway, which had definitely not been built with Arbiters in mind. “Where was it?”
“Stashed away in one of Roänach’s many, dusty closets. Frankly, I’m amazed he didn’t trash it.”
Shade attempted to lounge on my small bed in the corner of the room. It was more of a struggle. “Apparently, no one can resist holding on to your stuff…” By the time he settled, most of his limbs were hanging over the edges with his right wing smushed against the wall and the left covering most of the floor. Unsurprisingly, he scrunched up his nose with annoyance.
I couldn’t help but snort a laugh. “Comfortable?”
“No, but it’s still nice to lie down after the constant flying back and forth over the past week, or however many days it was.”
“Please tell me you made time for regular sleep.”
He yawned widely. “I think I took a few naps here and there.”
“Shade—”
“It was hard to sleep knowing you and the others were still here!”
I mulled over his excuse for a few seconds. “I suppose that’s fair… Well then,” a smile came to my face, “since I’m the last one, you’re now free to sleep as long as you want.”
“But we need to go back to Eidolon…”
“And we will, after you’ve rested up. I’d rather you not pass out mid-flight.”
“Mmmnnneehhh…” He repeatedly huffed with aggravation on his futile quest to get comfortable. Eventually, he gave up and sprawled on the floor instead, but there still wasn’t enough room for him to fully spread out. “Please tell me a bed exists that can fit my gigantic body.”
“Your mothers probably have a huge bed. I’m sure you can get a similar one custom made.”
“I don’t want to be an inconvenience.”
“Shade, there are craftspeople who make furniture for a living. As long as they’re paid for their work, you’re not inconveniencing anyone.”
“But I don’t have any money.”
“I guarantee your mothers will gladly pay them for you.”
“But—”
“But nothing. I promise everything will be properly taken care of.”
He anxiously patted the floor a few times before letting out a heavy breath. “Okay…”
“Good, now go to sleep.”
“I’m going, I’m going…”
I had stopped playing my harp during our back-and-forth, and it remained silent as I watched him finally close his eyes.
Joining him might be a good way to pass the time…
After weighing my options, I got up and set my harp on the dresser next to a bag I had found in the same closet. The small portrait and lunelight were already stowed in it for the trip.
I should probably find a bag for the harp too.
For now, I hunkered down on Shade’s chest with my face buried in his neck. “I’m tired too.”
He shook his head and draped one arm over my back. “Just admit you like feeling my muscles.”
“I already have.”
“You’re allowed to admit it twice.”
“I refuse.”
“So stubborn for no reason…”
“You bring out the best in me.”
He sighed and ran his claws through my hair. “Debatable…”
I just smiled and ghosted my fingers across his chest.
You really do, though.
It wasn’t long before he passed out from exhaustion. His hand had stopped moving when he fell asleep, but his fingers were still lost in my hair as I lay enjoying his warmth. It felt like he was sharing his heartbeat with me.
I don’t need one to feel alive anymore…
…
It was unclear how many hours passed once I fell asleep. When I finally stirred, Shade was seemingly still out cold, so I pressed the top of my head into the underside of his jaw in the hopes of gently waking him.
He grunted after a few seconds and pulled me down his torso. “Excuse me, that’s my throat you’re squishing.”
“Breathing is overrated.”
“Maybe for you, but some of us are still alive.”
“Wow, okay—” My fake offense was betrayed by a grin as I pushed myself upright with both hands firmly planted on his chest, drawing an even louder grunt this time.
“Rib cage—”
I stood and stretched my arms over my head. “Gods, you’re such a baby.”
He sat upright and cracked his shoulders. “Aren’t people supposed to be nice to babies?”
“I’m the exception.”
“Ooo, lucky me.”
I snickered and looked out the window to check the time. A glance toward the cave mouth indicated it was nighttime, but my eyes widened when the ground appeared lighter than usual.
Are the clouds finally gone?
I smacked the windowsill and impatiently tugged one of his wings. “Shade, get up!”
“Why? Is something wrong?”
“The exact opposite. Follow me.” I practically ran out of the room without waiting up for him. When he caught up to me near the castle’s front entrance, I turned to him and pointed at the ground. “Eyes down.”
He narrowed them instead. “Why are you acting so weird?”
“I’m not acting weird. I’m excited to show you something.”
His eyes widened this time. “Ooo, what is it?”
“You’ll see, but you can’t look up until I say so.”
“Uhhh, okay.”
As we traversed the cave, I glanced back now and then to make sure he was still looking at the ground. Luckily, he had the necessary willpower to survive the trek outside.
He was jittering impatiently by the time we stopped in the middle of the grassy field. “Is the secret thing more interesting than your boots?”
“Hopefully, but I’ll let you be the judge of that.”
This is it—
I exhaled deeply and turned to face him. “Before you look up, do you remember what you could see of the night sky from inside the solar shield?”
His eyes widened. “I… Yes, but it wasn’t much of a night sky, at least compared to descriptions I read in books.”
“How many stars do you think there are?”
“Well… There were various diagrams showing at least a hundred each, but I could only ever see maybe ten at most in real life. Eventually, I told myself the drawings had to be fake.” He halfheartedly twiddled his claws. “I hope there’s at least double of what I could see.”
I could barely contain myself as I took gentle hold of his hand. “See for yourself.”
He hesitated before slowly lifting his head. The moment he saw the stars, he gasped and froze where he stood. “Athaeÿn—” His hand trembled in mine. “I-Is this real?”
I looked up as well and smiled brightly. “This is real.”
The sky was anything but dark. Above our heads, the night elegantly wove a shimmering tapestry of glinting pastels across an infinite expanse of amethyst and azurite. From one horizon to the other, a single, violent brushstroke painted a gaping wound of nebulous clouds and even brighter stars. Visually, it was comparable to a worn seam splitting open. In reality, it was a window to the ever-shifting celestial plane our world called home.
There was no solar shield to obscure our view.
There were no voices to shatter the serenity.
For one ethereal moment, it was just me, Shade, and the heavens.
This was worth the wait.
His voice was weak when he finally spoke again. “A-All of this was right there the whole time?”
My gaze drifted to him. “Is it everything you hoped for?”
He sniffled and used his free hand to wipe tears from his eyes. “Not even my dreams came close to this.”
I smiled and gave his arm a light nudge. “Here, let’s sit for a while.”
Once he sat down, I settled on his lap with my legs on either side of his waist and my arms gently draped around his neck. Without a word, he returned the embrace and leaned his head on mine so we could stargaze in each other’s arms. If perfection existed, this was it.
I’ve wanted this for so long.
Ten blissful minutes of pure serenity came and went.
Why can’t life always be this peaceful…
After another minute or so, I smiled and playfully nosed his ear. “So, change your mind about heading back to Eidolon right away?”
“We can stay here a little longer…”
My grin widened for a second but faded when I glanced at the cave. “Is it alright if I bring up Roänach for a second?”
“Do you want to talk about his death?”
“Yes, but for you this time.”
“What do you mean?”
I pulled back just enough to look at him. “We both know I was a wreck, but I never asked if you were okay.”
“Why wouldn’t I be? I’m not the one he relentlessly tormented for three hundred years.”
“True, but you had been dreading the confrontation as well and, more importantly, had never killed anyone before him. Are you sure you’re alright after that?”
His eyes widened a bit. “Oh. Uhhh, I think so?” He rubbed his temple for a few seconds. “If anything, I’m a bit unnerved by how easy it was. I would never hesitate to save you, but… Shouldn’t it be difficult to take a life? Even when it’s someone like him?”
“Not to excuse or diminish what happened, but you are an Arbiter. By divine intent, one of your instincts is to protect the defenseless in any situation, no matter how extreme. Maybe that helps you do whatever is necessary.”
“Maybe…” He glanced off to one side. “I should probably ask my mothers to teach me more Arbiter stuff so I can be a good one.”
I smiled and rubbed his shoulders. “I think you’re off to a decent start.”
His gaze drifted back to me and brought a small smile with it. “I’m just glad I only had to use my magic to help and not hurt.”
“That’s something else I’ve been meaning to ask about. You said you were able to uncover some harmful aspects with your mothers’ help, right?”
His tentative smile vanished. “It was horrible. The worst part was Elvylli having me practice on her.”
“Wha— Did she really?”
He nodded. “She promised that her healing factor would fix any damage, but it was still terrifying.”
My brows went up a bit. “I mean… She’s probably right, but I would've been scared too.” I paused to think for a moment. “If it makes you feel better, she clearly trusts you with her life. That’s pretty significant.”
The tension in his face somewhat relaxed.
I was glad to ease his mind on that front, but my curiosity wasn’t satisfied. “If you don’t mind me asking, what were you able to do?”
His face tensed again. “Absorb more than just light.” He shook his head a little. “The darkness I made for Fiella is the neutral form, I guess. When Elvylli had me push toward intentional harm, it started… taking things from her.”
“Like what?”
“Her senses.”
Whatever I may have expected him to say, it wasn’t that. “Physical or mental?”
“Only physical, according to her. The neutral darkness just hides what people see, but the next level actually takes sight itself. And hearing. Touch, taste, smell, even spatial orientation… She was only able to tell me what happened after her healing factor restored everything.”
Gods…
My fingers stiffened on his shoulders. “Is there a deadly level?”
His face paled a little. “She had me push toward that as well. After taking her senses again, I felt it trying to take her soul.” He vehemently shook his head. “That’s when I refused to continue.”
I gawked at him and the implication of what his magic was capable of. “Well… Now I see why you didn’t want to use it for harm.”
He shook his head again. “I don’t care what situation I find myself in. I will never, ever, use my magic to hurt anyone. I'll always find another way.”
“Like with Roänach.”
“That required a unique approach anyway, but yeah…” His gaze slowly fell. “I hate that such magic exists. I hate that it’s part of my magic. Even if I never use it, I hate that it’s always an option.”
I quietly rubbed his shoulders for a few seconds. “You know, I’m glad you have the abilities you do.”
“What? Why?”
“Because the neutral one can shroud an entire city from danger and allow Vampires to walk in their own version of sunlight, something that’s never been possible before. As for the harmful ones,” my hands found and held his face, “I don’t know about you, but I’d much rather have such capabilities in your thoughtful claws than the troubled hands of Arbiters like Aëlla or Sae.”
His skeptical look softened into relief. “I guess I never thought of it that way.”
I smiled and prodded his cheeks with my thumbs. “I know, that’s why I did for you.”
He finally managed a smile of his own and rested his forehead on mine.
We sat in silence for a few minutes.
“You really did help save a lot of people… Thank you…” I leaned into his embrace. “And thank you for saving me.”
He chuckled quietly and threaded his fingers into my hair. “You saved me first, so it was the least I could do.” His smile faltered a bit. “I wish I could save your soul like you did mine, but I know yours is gone.”
My smile never wavered. “I think I’d rather have Lune anyway.”
There was a surge of warmth in my chest.
I love you too, Lune.
Shade’s smile warmed more than usual. “Lune loved you right from the start.”
And…
My hands slid down his neck and came to rest on his shoulders.
I want him to know.
A few anxious moments later, I pulled back so I could look into his eyes. “Shade, there’s something I need to tell you, but I don’t want to say it without a heartbeat.”
He looked slightly confused but didn’t hesitate to offer his hand.
Keeping his wrist steady, I sank my fangs into the usual spot at the base of his thumb and practically inhaled him. It was easy this time.
I swear this is the best he’s ever tasted.
With my heart beating once more, I slowly dragged my lips across the already healing puncture wounds and left a soft kiss on his palm. There was an amusing blush darkening his face when I glanced back up.
Still got it.
My hands drifted back to his shoulders. “I’m sure you remember everything I said in the spirit den,” an embarrassed smile tugged my lips, “or, rather, everything I sobbed.” To my annoyance, I suddenly felt the need to avert my gaze and was unable to stop myself. “My heart has been broken more times than I can count. Anything that reminded me of those failures became terrifying, and that fear became pain when I wanted to feel nothing but still felt everything.”
Shade sat perfectly still as he listened. Even his fingers waited patiently where they had woven into my hair.
“But then I found you.” Gathering all my courage, I finally met his gaze. “You spoke to me even when you couldn’t say anything. You touched my soul even though it’s gone…” My chest caught fire when I pressed my hand to his and found a second racing heartbeat. “I’ve been dead for a long time, but you make me feel alive."
By now, there was a gentle, half-lidded smile on his face, but he still didn’t move.
“I… I ended up feeling something for you I never intended.”
Just say it already.
My fingers trembled on his chest. “Shade, I-I…”
Dammit—
“Would it help if I said it first?”
My eyes shot wide. All I could manage was a small nod.
He cradled the back of my head and pulled me close. “I’ve wanted to say this for a while myself…” His lips brushed my cheek. “I love you, Athaeÿn.”
An embarrassing gasp escaped my throat.
He said it—
I couldn’t move.
H-He really said it—
I could only shiver violently in his warm embrace.
And I know he meant it.
“I love you too, Shade—” I was still saying his name as I grabbed his face and locked him in the most confident kiss I had ever given anyone. Every ounce of adoration, gratitude, and passion I could find went into it. Without question, it was the best kiss of my entire life.
My chest—
All of a sudden, I realized this was our first kiss with two heartbeats. Mine was so out of control it almost hurt, but I loved every second of it.
He truly is my everything.
The stars were ours alone that night.
Never let me go…
Epilogue ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 32
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Athaeÿn
All things considered, the chaos of Roänach’s failed invasion and subsequent demise were surprisingly short-lived. There was even enough time for the city’s Vampires to reach the interior districts before sunrise. Shade could have shielded them if necessary, but it mattered little since the clouds had yet to break.
As we headed for the mountain, Shade brought Vernyth but left Roänach’s body, which Elvylli incinerated as if simply clearing debris. He may as well have been litter. I certainly considered him garbage, but I didn’t stay to watch his cremation. I had seen enough.
Once Sathira dismissed her ice, the guards began tending to the newly freed Demons throughout the city, and their unaffected kin eagerly stepped in to help. Some had been enthralled far longer than others, but all retained their memories and regained their true personalities. It was heartbreaking to hear the cries of confusion from those struggling to make sense of everything. Fortunately, there were already vast support systems in place to help them.
It was eventually determined that over a thousand Demons had been dragged into this mess. Quite a few were able to describe the people whose souls had been used to summon them, but discussing murder was difficult at the best of times, let alone under such personal circumstances. For many of them, a bloody corpse was the first thing they saw post-summoning. Sadly, memories like this were common and haunted most forever.
The queens were dismayed to learn a sizable portion of the Demons had been summoned elsewhere and sent to the capital to lie in wait. A number of disappearances from Eidolon were “found” in memories, but many descriptions didn’t match anything in the capital’s census data. They promptly requested the records of missing people from other cities, towns, and villages to try and identify as many victims as possible.
While specialists organized these investigations, preparations were made to hold a citywide service for everyone lost to Roänach over the centuries. Unidentified and unknown victims would be included as well. In the meantime, Shade requested that his own remembrance, Tyrran’s Shrine, be converted into a permanent memorial for the victims. Knowing their son was actually alive and well, the queens were happy to fulfill his wish.
In the hopes of commemorating as many names as possible, they scheduled the primary service for a much later date but gave Vernyth a funeral right away. His death marked true freedom for his vassals, but most had already forgiven him. A few, including Callyn, took turns embracing his body while they still could. Their old friend had come through when it mattered most.
Elvylli personally lit Vernyth’s grand funeral pyre, which had been encircled by a surprisingly large crowd of old friends and strangers alike. The most unexpected attendee was Daryn. Not only did he show up to pay his respects, but he went out of his way to publicly acknowledge Vernyth’s relentless fight with Roänach and how his honorable sacrifice undoubtedly saved many lives. I could tell Callyn was touched by his sentiment.
…
As soon as Elvylli and Sathira confirmed Eidolon’s security and retrieved Daryn, they met up with me and Shade to make a return trip to Castle Veil. To my annoyance, this was when the clouds finally decided to break. Shade, on the other hand, took the opportunity to see if his magic could protect Vampires like I had suggested. It proved incredibly effective when Daryn and I served as test subjects. When shielded by Shade's darkness, we were immune to the sun’s light but could still feel its warmth. I had never experienced anything like it. Without thermal vision, it was like standing in the middle of a sunny field with a heavy blindfold on. With thermal vision, it was a bit too blinding for my liking. Shade was thrilled regardless.
Rather than waiting for nighttime, we flew to Castle Veil concealed inside a sphere of his darkness. It probably looked weird and creepy to anyone who didn’t know what it was, which Daryn found highly amusing. This kept him in good spirits for quite a while, but he became increasingly anxious the closer we got to our destination. I knew exactly why but kept that to myself.
Upon arrival, there was a triumphant and emotional reunion with Fiella, Haana, and Lánelli, the first of whom was still wearing the flower crown I had given her. We had all felt the arcane bond disappear the moment Roänach died, so they knew of our success long before we got there. They and the other vassals had been tending to the Demons and blood captives to the best of their ability, which the queens thanked them for in addition to promising counseling for all of them.
The blood captives were in the worst shape due to their particularly intense enthrallment, but Daryn had seen many cases of similar aftermath and was certain they could recover with enough time and care. I felt tremendous guilt for never being able to help them, but the ones who were coherent enough to understand the situation didn’t blame me, the other vassals, or the Demons. For the most part, they were just relieved to have been liberated like the rest of us.
I forgot what true freedom felt like.
As Shade cheerfully busied himself with Fiella, Haana, and Lánelli, I spotted Roänach’s opulent, black coach abandoned at the side of the cavern. Instead of being hitched to it like usual, the two glossy draft horses stood freely nearby with Xiir coddling them affectionately. Next to him was the Fauna Demon Roänach had summoned the day he sent me away.
Hopefully, I can learn her name too.
Before heading over, I got Daryn’s attention and gestured for him to follow me. His silent compliance betrayed just how nervous he was, so I made sure to keep him hidden behind me as we approached.
It’ll be alright, Daryn.
Meanwhile, Xiir guided the other Fauna Demon’s hand across the closest horse’s shoulder. “You see? They’re just like the nosteryx back in Dominion.”
She looked like she was on the verge of tears, but I knew it wasn’t because of the horse.
Thank the gods she already has a friend to distract her.
Speaking of which, I was downright floored by Xiir’s gentle smile and soft tone of voice. After three hundred years of him being an unwilling jackass, it was almost hard to believe this was the real him.
Xiir turned his head slightly when I stopped a few feet away, but he refocused on his companion before addressing me. “Here, hug Nimbus’ face for a bit.” He put her arms around the horse’s head. “He loves being held like a big baby.”
She immediately clung to Nimbus and buried her face in his cheek, a gesture he seemed to enjoy as he snorted happily and leaned into the embrace.
With his companion occupied for the moment, Xiir finally turned to me. “Athaeÿn…” His eyes were heavy with shame. “I'm so sorry for how I treated you all these years.”
I shook my head a little. “You don’t need to apologize for what wasn’t your fault, but if you still want to point fingers at bad behavior, look no further than when I dropped my trunk on your feet.” A guilty smile tugged my lips. “That was all me, and I apologize.”
He returned a small grin. “That was rather painful and unjustified, but I can’t say I blame your frustration at the time.”
“You had definitely gotten on my nerves, but I was still relieved when Xythe didn’t kill you.”
“As was I.”
It was nice to finally have a real conversation with him. “Anyway, there’s someone who’d like to speak with you, Xiir.”
“Who— Wait, how do you know my name?”
I just smiled and sidestepped to reveal Daryn, who had seemingly frozen where he stood.
Xiir’s eyes widened. “I remember you.”
Once Daryn got his feet to cooperate, he approached and stopped right in front of Xiir. “I saw you when you were still enthralled.” He shook his head. “I couldn’t believe it.”
Xiir sighed and nodded. “To this day, I’m not sure why Roänach went after me, but, as was most often the case, he got what he wanted.” He paused and tilted his head. “As good as it is to see you, why are you here?”
There were already tears in Daryn’s eyes. “I never got to thank you again. You freed us by killing Rialla a second time, but you were gone by the time we found out and searched for you.”
“And now you know why.”
Daryn extended a trembling hand. “I did everything I could to set things right.”
Xiir took it without breaking eye contact. “Did you kill Roänach?”
“No, but I helped the queens during his invasion. We were able to stop his other Demons without losing any.”
Xiir didn’t hesitate to pull him into a hug. “Thank you.”
Daryn’s eyes widened before closing tightly, sending tears down his cheeks. “I owe you everything.”
“You owe me nothing, Daryn.”
They held their embrace for over a minute.
When they separated, Daryn smiled and wiped his eyes. “If you ever move to Eidolon, I think you would be a great Representative for your fellow Demons.”
“I’ve never been one for cities or leadership, but I’ll gladly visit you someday.”
Daryn nodded. “I understand. Until we meet again, take care.”
“You as well.” Xiir offered a lighthearted grin. “If I find any more Arch-Vampires, you’ll be the first to know.”
“I’ll hold you to that.”
When Xiir turned back to his companion, she was still hugging Nimbus’ face. “Xira, why don’t you come with me? I hear there’s a forest out west overflowing with the most wildlife of any region on the continent. What better place to find other Fauna Demons?” He put his hand on her shoulder. “Besides, I could always use extra help caring for the horses, and Nimbus already likes you.”
She let go of the horse in question and turned to him. “You really wouldn’t mind?”
“I would be welcoming your company, not tolerating you.” He smiled and tilted his head. “Has a nicer ring to it, don’t you think?”
She managed a small smile of her own. “Yes, I like that better.”
Fiella came over during the lull in their conversation. “I’m so sorry about Xixi. Will she be alright?”
Xira’s smile weakened a bit but didn’t break as she turned to her. “Yes. We were living with my brother at the time, so he’ll have found the sigil my summoning left behind and know what it means. He’ll take good care of her for me. I know it.”
“Do you think you’ll ever see her again?”
She hung her head a little. “I don’t know. I pray she’s never ripped from Dominion like I was, but Daemir forbid if she is summoned one day, I hope she finds me.”
Fiella smiled. “I know you’ll both be okay.”
“Thank you, dear.”
After sharing a hug, Fiella and Xira separated so the latter and Xiir could mount the horses.
I waved to them both. “Good luck with everything.”
Daryn pointed right at Xiir’s face. “You’d better write to me once you’re settled down.”
“I will. You have my word.”
“I look forward to many words.”
Meanwhile, Fiella sniffled from where she stood huddled next to me. “Please be safe.”
Xira smiled at her. “We promise.”
With departing waves, the two Demons rode out of the cavern together.
Once they were gone, I glanced down at Fiella. “Feel better?”
She nodded and wiped her eyes. “I had to know her baby would be okay.”
“And now you do.”
Her gaze was still locked on the cave mouth. “I went outside a few times after the runes were shut down, but now that the sun’s out, it feels like it’s taunting me.”
As it just so happens—
Before I could say anything, Shade rushed over and stood in front of her so she had to look at him instead. The beaming smile on his face may as well have been her sunlight.
And to think, he was afraid his magic couldn’t help anyone.
Fiella just stared ahead as if he wasn’t even there. “Hi, Tyrran…”
He dropped to one knee so he was closer to her eye level. “I never mentioned how Daryn and Athaeÿn were able to travel in the middle of a sunny day, did I?”
She shook her head.
His smile widened as he offered his hand. “Let me show you.”
Despite the confusion in her eyes, she nodded and took his hand, if a bit warily.
He led her to the farthest point of the cave mouth and paused right at the edge. “Ready?”
She nodded again.
After giving her hand a light squeeze, he formed a small sphere of darkness in the center of his chest and expanded it until they were both swallowed up.
I switched to my thermal vision in time to see Fiella look around for a few seconds before glancing up at Shade, likely having switched visions as well.
“This is your magic?”
“Some of it, but this is all we need.” He gently tugged her hand. “Come on.”
They were still in the mountain’s shadow when they stepped outside. The farther they went, the more Shade expanded his darkness, but just enough to overlap with the cave mouth for a safe retreat if needed.
When they reached the edge of the mountain’s shadow, Fiella stopped and nervously eyed the thermally brilliant, sunlit ground in front of her.
Shade lightly waggled her hand. “I promise you’ll be okay.”
She didn’t move at first but eventually nodded and clung to his hand with both of hers.
Meanwhile, Haana, Lánelli, and I watched intently from inside the cave.
You can do it, Fiella.
A moment later, Shade stepped into the sunlight and gently pulled her with him.
She gasped when the sun’s warmth embraced her skin for the first time in months. “Is it working? Are we really in sunlight?”
“We are.”
A small sob jerked her shoulders as she turned her face toward the sky. There was a long pause before she smiled to herself. “I can feel the sun…”
My thermal vision proved as much as I watched her slowly brighten with warmth.
How it should be for a Light Elf.
All of a sudden, she turned back to Shade and started jumping up and down with his hand still clutched in hers. “I can feel the sun!”
I couldn’t help but choke up when she let go and started running around with her arms flung out to the sides, laughing and cheering as she went.
“I can feel the sun!”
Lánelli didn’t hesitate to join them, but Haana hung back to share a glance with me. I just smiled and gave an encouraging nod toward the others, which she was hesitant to accept but eventually acquiesced when my feet remained planted.
Thank you, though.
As Haana and Lánelli enjoyed the sun’s warmth from the ground, Shade snatched up Fiella and sat her on his shoulders, where she held her arms high above her head and continued cheering as he spun around to celebrate with her.
It wasn’t long before the other vassals noticed what was going on and went outside as well. Like me, some of them hadn’t felt the sun’s warmth on their skin in centuries, but I politely turned them down when they asked if I wanted to join them. I was quite content watching everyone from afar, especially Fiella. Basking in their joy was more than enough for me.
You have no idea how much this means to them, Shade.
I had to dry grateful tears from my eyes.
Thank you.
Chapter 33 ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 31
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Athaeÿn
Roänach and just I stared at each other in dead silence. He hadn’t moved a single muscle since we made eye contact, but I had never felt more helpless and afraid in my entire life. This stillness was somehow worse than both of my murders.
I should’ve stayed with Callyn—
My shoulders trembled as my eyes frantically darted across his face, trying to find even the smallest hint of emotion. Anger. Disappointment. Frustration. Anything.
There was nothing.
Shade, I need you—
Any rage I had saved for this moment was gone.
Shade, please—
All my determination evaporated, allowing endless, unchecked fear to fill the void. I desperately searched for the gall I had thrown in Roänach’s face when refusing to be sent away, but I couldn’t find it. My desire for revenge was supposed to be giving me strength. All I had was shot nerves and broken courage.
Shade…
I had reached the breaking point when spurning Roänach in his study. Other than fading memories of loved ones and pathetic attempts to protect the other vassals, I’d had almost nothing to lose at the time. That was no longer the case.
I had been reminded of how much friendship meant to me.
I still had to find my parents.
I had promised Lune to make the most of my life.
There were people waiting to be freed.
Shade and I had devoted ourselves to each other.
But I didn’t get to tell him how I truly feel.
I had everything to lose this time.
And I’m about to lose it all.
Roänach finally moved.
Oh no—
In my deteriorating mental state, I instinctively drew the wooden stake from my boot and pointed it right at him, knowing full well the gesture was useless. My entire body was shaking and panicking. There was no doubt in my mind I looked like an imbecile, awkwardly clutching the stake with both hands and holding it at arm’s length as if hoping he would just walk into it.
I didn’t know what else to do.
Between the slippery ice and the fact he could easily outpace me as a swarm of bats, there was no point in trying to run. If anything, that would just get me killed faster.
At least he’s not in a hurry for some reason.
His oddly calm demeanor was still terrifying, but I tried latching onto it instead.
It’s not over yet.
I forced myself to take a few deep breaths.
There’s still time to turn this around.
As he continued his slow approach, something in me snapped. The closer he got, the more this feeling shifted and fell apart as if nothing more than broken pottery. To my genuine surprise, it was my paralyzing fear. Like a sundered shield, its cracks were further split by a force they could no longer hold back. Everything began seeping through.
The pain and misery.
I trusted him, and he betrayed me.
My dread faded with each step he took.
I loved him, and he killed me.
My shoulders heaved with loathing.
He ruined my life for no reason.
He had sealed his fate long ago.
I hate him.
It hurt to accept.
I hate him so fucking much.
But I had to.
I hate him even more than myself.
And I finally did.
I want him dead.
By the time he reached me, I stood tall and confident with my arms folded defiantly, having slipped the wooden stake back into my boot long before he arrived. Our steadfast eye contact only intensified now that we stood face-to-face with the toes of our boots almost touching.
I’ve waited so long for this moment.
Shade was undoubtedly scouring the city for me, so it was only a matter of time before he showed up.
I just need to stall.
“Took your sweet time sauntering over here.”
Roänach’s blank expression turned into a calm smile. “Had you met me halfway, some of those precious minutes of yours could have been salvaged.”
“True, but I was also hoping you would slip and fall on your face.”
“Charming. Is the anticipation of my suffering your only source of arousal these days?”
“Lighting your funeral pyre is a close second.”
His smile faded as he put his hands on his hips. “You know,” he shook his head and sighed dramatically, “I dare say I took Polite Athaeÿn for granted.” He then pulled the wooden stake from my boot and used it to point over his shoulder at Vernyth’s body. “Though it would seem you’ve maintained at least a speck of common courtesy. Why else accept a gift you can’t even use?”
“Who says it was for me?”
He didn’t bother looking around to see if we were alone. “Then why do you have it?”
“I forgot to give it to the intended recipient.”
His brows went up a little. “Interesting choice of circumstances to prove that centuries of deception haven’t robbed you of all integrity.”
When I said nothing, he headed over to the wall and peered down at the next street. I could hear the Demons trying and, thankfully, failing to claw through the ice around their feet.
Hopefully, they’re not hurting themselves.
After watching for a few seconds, he came back over and stared at me expectantly, but I remained silent.
This time, his voice had a slight edge to it. “I’m waiting.”
My arms were still folded. “For what?”
“Do you really think you’re in a position to test my patience?”
“You could’ve just asked how I pulled this off, but you’re allergic to rational conversation.”
“Tension is more titillating.” He shook his head again. “Well, now that the topic has been so eloquently broached, do enlighten me as to how you managed to single-handedly ruin everything.”
“I had quite a bit of help ruining everything, actually.”
“Is Xythe dead?”
“Yes, but not by my hand.”
“That was never my assumption. Your otherwise talented hands are inept when it comes to violence.”
“Which is a shame, considering your face is within reach.”
His gaze lazily drifted off to the side. “How fortunate for me…” he mumbled, briefly toying with the stake before pausing and narrowing his eyes at my chest.
Shit. He senses you, Lune—
Without warning, he violently gripped my throat with one hand, but I was more startled than surprised. This was nothing new for him. He had strangled me with lethal force many times during sex, so I knew this was different. In fact, I knew exactly what he was doing.
At least I don’t have to feign enjoyment anymore.
It had always been difficult to do so. Just because Undead couldn’t be choked to death didn’t mean it wasn’t painful, and this time was no exception. I tried to remain stoic, but a small grunt still slipped out when he dug his thumb as hard as he could into the soft underside of my jaw.
This isn’t even a good excuse to touch me.
Fortunately, his attempt at enthrallment didn’t work.
Would you please just let go already—
When he finally did, I refused to rub my neck but couldn’t stop myself from coughing a few times. It felt like his hand was still there.
Meanwhile, he glared at my chest again. “It almost feels like a soul, but…” He shook his head once more and found my gaze. “What is it?”
“A dear friend.”
He scoffed loudly. “Please. All of your friends have either died or forgotten you.”
I sighed even louder than his scoff. “Look, as much as I would love a typical, romantic evening of being insulted for hours on end, don’t you have better things to do?”
A casual grin returned to his face. “Yes, as a matter of fact. All of this admirable effort will have been in vain once I regroup and launch a second invasion.” He dragged the tip of the stake down my facial scar. “A successful one.”
“By adding one more Demon? Yeah, that might do it.”
He repositioned the tip of the stake to my throat. “My plans won’t concern the dead.”
“Killing me and leaving so soon?” I put on a laughably fake pout. “But I’ve rather enjoyed your insufferable monologuing.”
Any day now, Shade—
He tilted his head with an unwavering smile. “If you’re going to continue stalling, at least make it a bit less obvious.”
“We both know I can’t fool you anyway.”
“Too true, so why don’t we put an end to this charade?” He pressed the tip of the stake harder against my neck, enough to indent my skin but not pierce it. “Once you’re dead, I’ll have all the time in the world to come up with an improved plan.”
I grunted a little from the pressure on my throat. “I wouldn’t be so sure of that.”
“Your bluffing needs work as well.”
“I’m not bluffing.”
His smile fractured ever so slightly. “Care to elaborate?”
“I took the queens to Castle Veil on the way here.” It was my turn to smugly tilt my head. “I’m afraid you’ll have to find a new secret fortress.”
The look on his face was priceless.
Worth every second of misery.
His smile was long gone. “You—”
“Rat bastard. Yes, I know.” I put on a neutral expression to match my deadpan tone. “Do you need a minute? This must be very upsetting for you.”
His hand trembled with rage as he retracted the stake and pointed it at my face. “You… have become far more trouble than you’re worth.”
I didn’t break eye contact. “Maybe you should have left me alone from the beginning.”
“Maybe I should have.” He pressed the weapon to my chest this time. “And yet, it’s because of me you have any value whatsoever.”
“That’s not going to work on me, jackass.”
“Won’t it?” He twisted the stake into my shirt and hissed through his teeth. “You were nothing when I found you. Just a lonely, desperate slut, willing to throw your whole life away the moment someone pretended to show genuine interest.”
I felt Lune’s worry but ignored it. There was no backing down now.
I’ve had it.
And yet, my glare of pure hatred was betrayed by the burn of heartbreak. “That’s rich coming from a parasite who turned his castle into a fucking brothel so his dick would never dry.”
“I just know what I like and take what I can find.”
“Like how you took everything from me.”
“As if you’re free of blame. Unlike innocent, kidnapped Fiella, you eagerly gave yourself away.”
“And I’ve never regretted anything more in my entire life!” I leaned forward on the stake and pointed a shaky finger right between his eyes. “You’re nothing more than a rapist and a murderer.”
“And you’re nothing more than a slave and a whore.” His words flowed with gut-wrenching ease as he got right in my face. “I never felt a single fucking thing for you. No one ever has.”
Tears finally came to my eyes. “Th-That’s not true.”
“Your history of failure says otherwise.” He leaned so close I could taste his breath. “You have never been anything more than a means to an end.”
Shut up—
“A tool to be used and discarded.”
Stop—
His lips brushed against mine. “Scraps.”
P-Please—
It was at that moment I realized Shade still hadn’t come for me.
Wait—
And just like that, my resolve shattered.
N-No—
Roänach was wrong.
He had to be wrong.
He just knows how to get to me—
Shade was different from the others. I was something truly special to him. He had said so himself. He had meant it. I had seen it in his eyes. He was going to show up at any second. He was going to save me.
I won’t be abandoned this time—
I was certain of it.
But nothing happened.
I waited.
But he didn’t come.
What…?
I started to panic.
Wh-Where is he?
Meanwhile, Roänach silently pulled back and readjusted his grip on the stake.
But… I-I thought…
Seconds away from a complete breakdown, I caught movement in my peripheral vision. When I subtly glanced past Roänach, it was just in time to see a formless void whip around the corner at the end of the street.
Shade!
I barely managed to contain a sob of relief as he raced toward us through the ice. His shadow was the fastest thing I had ever seen.
He came for me—
My tearful gaze drifted back to Roänach. “You wasted too much time.”
He almost looked bored as he reeled back with the stake. “The only one wasting my time is you.” The moment he moved to strike, he hesitated and squinted down at my feet.
You’re too late.
As much as I wanted to hide behind Shade, I stayed put and kept my eyes locked on Roänach. Specifically, the increasing alarm on his face as a towering figure materialized behind me. The more his head tilted back, the paler he became, but when he froze entirely, I knew he had made eye contact with an unfamiliar Arbiter he had no strategy against.
Finally.
In that moment, Shade was death incarnate.
It’s over, Roänach.
Knowing I was safe, three hundred years of anger, betrayal, and resentment melted away my fear one last time. Despite the satisfaction of Roänach’s pure terror, it was less than a fraction of what he had instilled over the centuries. No amount of retribution would ever be enough, but this would have to suffice.
It’s your turn to know fear.
Evidently, he was paralyzed with it.
Shade took the opportunity to reach over my shoulder and grab him by the throat, drawing a deep, guttural rasp as he effortlessly lifted him off the ground until they were eye level. There was a pitiful grunt when his claws dug in. “You made a grave mistake coming here.”
I shuddered at his dark tone and the scent of cold blood seeping from Roänach’s neck. I had never heard such formidable authority in Shade’s voice before.
Before Roänach could snap out of his terrified daze, Shade ripped the wooden stake from his hand and drove it through his heart.
It was over.
All I could do was stand and watch as he twisted and wrenched the stake deeper and deeper.
“I think we’ve all had enough,” he added lowly, using so much force the weapon erupted from Roänach’s back with a spray of blood.
At first, Roänach gasped and twitched in his captor’s iron grip. Then, he stopped moving entirely.
Despite Roänach’s obvious passing, Shade tightened his grip on the dead man’s neck until there was a reverberating crunch. “You will never hurt anyone ever again,” he hissed in the Arch-Vampire’s ashen face before dropping his lifeless body at my feet with an unceremonious thud.
I had no reaction when he hit the ground.
That’s it?
My gaze slowly lifted to the cloudy night sky.
Is that really it?
A choked sob clawed its way out of my throat.
It’s finally over—
I clenched my eyes shut and sank to my knees. Before I could stop myself, I clutched my chest and let out a bloodcurdling scream.
Three hundred years—
When my lungs gave out, I lost all control and broke down sobbing violently. My body was shaking so badly it hurt. I tried to cover my mouth to stifle the wails of anguish, but my trembling fingers just curled in on themselves and caught tears instead of cries.
Three hundred fucking years—
I heard a shift behind me but barely registered my own movement as something gently pulled me backward. Something strong and unusually warm. There was also a familiar, steady rhythm beating against my arm. It was oddly soothing, but I couldn’t figure out what it was. Not in the state I was in.
All I could see was a blur. All I could feel was disappointment.
I’m finally free, but…
I shook my head and sucked in a sharp breath through my teeth.
Why don’t I feel happy?
In my disoriented mindset, I angrily slammed my fist on the broad surface next to me but froze when I heard a grunt from the impact.
What was—
I looked up and gasped the moment I found Shade’s eyes. All of a sudden, reality came rushing back.
Wait—
I frantically attempted to ground myself.
I’m on Shade’s lap.
His arms are around me.
The rhythm was his heartbeat.
I’m leaning on his chest—
My eyes widened with horror when I realized what I had hit.
Oh no—
I could barely see him through my tears. “Shade, I-I’m so sorry.”
“It’s alright, Athaeÿn—”
“N-No, it’s not alright. I didn’t realize— I-I didn’t mean to—”
“Stop.” His tone was soft but firm as he pressed his thumb to my lips. When he lowered his hand, he offered a reassuring smile. “It takes a lot more than that to hurt me.”
I just stared at him for a few seconds before closing my eyes and burying my face in his chest. Every unnecessary breath was a struggle for my tormented throat, but at least the trembling in my shoulders faded as he slowly combed his fingers through my hair. Grateful was insufficient.
Thank you anyway…
Neither of us said anything for quite a while.
Eventually, I cracked my eyes open and pressed my hand to his chest where I had accidentally hit him. I could barely manage a whisper. “I didn’t realize it was you.”
“I know.”
There was another stretch of silence.
“Why were you so angry?”
The concern in his voice punched me in the gut. “To be clear, I’m not mad at you,” I mumbled, sniffling and wiping my eyes.
“Then, what’s wrong? I thought you would be relieved.”
“I am. It… It’s just…” Organizing my muddled thoughts into something more coherent was proving difficult. “I thought his death would be more satisfying, that I would feel better and get back everything he took from me.” I shook my head against his chest. “I thought I would finally be free…”
“You are free, though, right? Or, at least, no longer a vassal?”
I nodded weakly.
He said nothing for a moment. “Are you still sad he had to die?”
I nodded again.
“You’re allowed to be upset.”
My throat twinged with frustration. “But I don’t want to be upset. All his control, all this heartache, everything was supposed to die with him… but he’s still hanging over me.”
Shade quietly ran his fingers through my hair for a few minutes. “You know, rational or not, I thought Xythe was my loving father for a thousand years. Now that he’s gone, am I just supposed to act like nothing happened?”
I shook my head while listening to his heartbeat.
“Then give yourself the same grace.”
One final tear came down my cheek as I closed my eyes and exhaled deeply.
He’s right…
After another minute of silence, he gently lifted my chin so I could see his face, where he had a warm smile waiting for me. “Let’s not be harder on ourselves than we need to be.”
His amber eyes had never been so comforting.
Eventually, I managed a fragile smile of my own. “I suppose I’ve already done enough of that.”
“Probably too much.” His smile softened as he caressed the side of my face. “You’ve been so patient and understanding with me from the very beginning. You deserve the same.”
I leaned into his hand. “You have done the same for me.”
His smile never wavered as he lightly shook his head. “I meant for yourself.”
Oh.
My smile widened as I knelt on his thighs and draped my arms over his shoulders. “I’ll try, but for the moments I can’t, I know you’ll be there for me.”
He rested his forehead on mine. “Always.”
We both closed our eyes and locked each other in a tight embrace.
I shut out everything else.
Shade was far more than just my friend.
He was my love.
My world.
My everything…
Chapter 32 ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 30
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Athaeÿn
When I left the citadel, even fewer people were out than before.
Looks like the guards have been productive.
Some of said people were Demons, but not as many as I expected.
Maybe most of his forces are hiding.
It was then I spotted Daryn leaning on a wall nearby, seemingly engrossed in a book, the title of which was obscured by a folded piece of paper draped over the cover. I approached to talk to him but took a second to read the handwritten, substitute title neatly penned on the paper.
Reasonable Men and Their Idiot Friends Who Won’t Stop Talking to That Fucking Arch-Vampire
By Disregarded Daryn
I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose.
And he called Elvylli dramatic…
He didn’t look up from the book. “Curious to see you here.”
“Is it, though?”
“Hmm,” he flipped a page way louder than necessary, “I suppose what’s truly curious is your decision to involve a second Arch-Vampire in this mess.”
“I had to get past the bullshit rocks somehow.”
His eyes tensed as he stared at the page. “You’re not safe here.”
“Better than cowering miles away.”
After a long pause, he finally looked at me. “Vernyth is here, isn’t he?”
I nodded.
He averted his gaze and shook his head. “If he somehow manages to trip and fall into helping us, perhaps I could be persuaded to at least shake his hand before killing him.”
I folded my arms. “I’ve only known him for a few hours, but I felt his remorse in minutes. Real remorse. I truly believe he would never hurt innocents on purpose. More importantly, he’s willing to lay down his life fighting Roänach.”
“Good, maybe we can get rid of two Arch-Vampires at once.”
A huff slipped out. “Will you please just give him a chance?”
“I am giving him a chance. It’s up to him to prove any usefulness outside of death.”
I waited for him to look at me. When he didn’t, I sighed heavily and averted my gaze as well. “I suppose that’s all I can ask…”
“It’s all you’re getting.”
Neither of us said anything for a minute.
Daryn was the one to break the silence. “I’m not angry with you.”
“Really? Could’ve fooled me.”
He shook his head. “I’m sorry, Athaeÿn, I can’t trust Vernyth. I just can’t. I’ve seen far too much suffering at the hands of Arch-Vampires to give even one a chance that none deserve in the first place. Redeemable or not, none should exist. That’s just how it has to be.”
The defeat in his tone was all too familiar.
I know, Daryn. I’m tired too.
My gaze dropped to his book. “I’m not asking you to trust him.” I plucked the loose paper off the cover and folded it into a bookmark, which I gently placed in the middle of the open pages. “I just want you to see he’s not what you think.”
After staring at the blank bookmark for at least a minute, he finally looked at me again. “I suppose I wouldn’t mind being proven wrong just this once.”
I was relieved to see his demeanor soften. “Vernyth or no Vernyth, Roänach is a confirmed threat. I promise we’ll get him.”
“Pff, how quaint of you to reassure me when this is your master we’re talking about.”
“In my defense, he’s a danger to everyone. I’ll make sure he never hurts anyone again, even if it’s the last thing I do.”
He shook his head and waggled his finger. “No, no, no. You’ve already died twice, my friend. You’re not allowed to die a third time.”
“Shade would agree, so make sure your plan works.” I smiled and began walking away. “And he’s not a big, red momma’s boy!”
“Yes he is!”
I was still grinning to myself as I continued making my way down the streets, but my amusement faded when a guard ran past me toward the citadel.
Uh oh—
I paused to look around and spotted a different guard speaking with a Human teenager. The girl smiled and nodded when bid farewell, but her expression turned eerily blank once the guard's back was to her. Instead of leaving, she just kept standing there.
Why aren’t you going home?
As I hesitantly considered approaching, yet another guard came around the corner but stopped dead in her tracks when she noticed the girl. This guard was a Mirage Demon.
Wait—
All of a sudden, a lone firework went off above the exterior districts, drawing both my and the guard’s attention.
Shit—
I whipped back around to find the girl charging me, now grinning wildly with manic bloodlust in her eyes. She was wearing shoes, but her footfalls made the distinct sound of claws scraping the ground.
I knew it—
She had yet to reach me when the vocal runes lit up with a loud hum.
“Blackout.”
Just one second later, everything went pitch-black.
Good job, Shade.
I switched to thermal vision just in time to see my attacker come to a screeching halt a few feet away. Sure enough, the illusion of a Human girl was betrayed by her heat signature, which revealed the unmistakable form of a Mirage Demon. Fortunately, the darkness had left her looking around blindly and hissing profanities under her breath.
Please just stay there—
A cry rang out nearby. To my dismay, her head snapped toward it, and I was further mortified by the sight of what appeared to be a young couple holding two small children.
Why are they out here?!
I watched the Mirage Demon for a few moments to see what she would do. Luckily, while she did make an attempt to feel her way toward where the sound had come from, she moved incredibly slowly and slightly off course from where the family stood.
Good.
Without further hesitation, I rushed over as quickly but quietly as possible. “Don’t panic, the blackout is meant to protect you,” I said just loud enough for them to hear, keeping an eye on the Mirage Demon over my shoulder as I carefully herded them toward the closest building. Fortunately, my touch anxiety remained minimal.
As the woman attempted to quiet the toddler in her arms, she kept her voice low as well despite sounding a bit frantic. “What’s happening?”
“Arch-Vampire with enthralled Demons. Lock the door and don’t let anyone in,” I whispered back, gently pushing them inside and closing the door behind them. After some muffled fumbling on the other side, the lock clicked into place.
This might actually work.
I set about ushering every non-Demon civilian I came across into any unlocked building I could find, regardless of private residency or not. At this point, just getting them off the streets was more important. It felt shitty ignoring every Demon in my path, but I genuinely couldn’t tell which were enthralled. I couldn’t risk anything.
When I reached the gap in the mountainside, a familiar, rapidly approaching presence froze me where I stood. Sure enough, when I looked out over the descending exterior districts, the undulating color spectrum of an aggressive bat swarm was barreling my way.
No—
Just as I was about to panic, a second swarm flew over my head from behind and intercepted Roänach before he could reach the cavern. An immense wave of relief just about knocked me over, and I was left gawking as the two masses clashed in a giant, writhing cloud of screeching chaos.
Thank you, Vernyth.
After taking a moment to collect myself, I headed out to the exterior districts and resumed helping people indoors. Fortunately, the streets were already pretty clear of non-Demon civilians thanks to the head start provided by the guards, but with most of them now unable to see, my fellow Vampires had picked up where they left off.
I kept an eye on the raging bat swarm but was repeatedly distracted by the efforts all around me. Of the many Vampires working tirelessly to get others to safety, the vast majority were just regular civilians. The few who were guards primarily teamed up with Inverse Demons and guided them through the darkness to free any enthralled Demons they could find. I had already seen quite a few instances of success.
The Captain of the Guard will be pleased.
I actually got a bit emotional seeing so many of my kind working together to protect the city from one of our own.
See, Roänach? No one wants you here.
When I turned down the next street, it was entirely clear of living civilians.
Hopefully, that means most of the city is secure by now.
Other than a few living guards who had been placed in front of some doors, the only people out in the open were Vampires, all of whom were watching the screeching tempest high overhead. One of the dark silhouettes was unusually familiar, and I nearly tripped in shock when they spoke to the person next to them.
That voice—
I could barely move. “Callyn?”
The Vampire in question flinched. “What—” They slowly turned until they were facing me. “I-It can’t be—”
Time stopped as we stared at each other.
“Athaeÿn?”
Callyn—
We collided in an almost violent embrace before I even realized what was happening. Three centuries of missing my best friend had shoved aside any and all anxiety I may have felt from their touch.
I thought I’d never see them again.
They broke down sobbing into my chest. “I-It’s really you—”
“It’s me.” I struggled to remain composed while cradling the back of their head. “I missed you so much.”
“I looked for you so many times. I-I was afraid you were dead.”
My throat tightened. “Well—”
“Wait, how did you—” As quickly as they had flung their arms around me, they pulled back and looked me up and down with increasing panic. “No… No, no, no!” Their trembling hands gripped my shoulders tightly. “Why do you look like that?!”
Guilt poured from the wound inflicted by their anguish.
“Callyn—”
“What happened?! Who turned you?!”
I winced slightly from their enraged shout, but my heart hurt far more than my ears. I had never seen them this angry before.
I’m so sorry, Callyn.
Heavy with shame, I slowly pointed at the warring bats overhead. “Roänach, the Arch-Vampire trying to take over the city… The man I left with all those years ago…”
It never gets easier to admit…
Callyn glared up at the swarms. “If Vernyth doesn’t kill him, I’ll tear his throat out myself.” There was a pause before they looked at me with surprise. “Wait, if you and Vernyth are both here, does that mean he actually took my letter seriously?”
“He is the one who deactivated our runes, but he didn’t exactly find me. It’s a long story.”
“I see. Well, I’m just glad he’s helping.” They paused again to look around. “By the way, do you know who’s wielding this darkness?”
“The queens didn’t say anything?”
“Not much, just that they found whoever was responsible for the giant void on the horizon and that they might show up to help. I assume the secrecy is a tactical choice, but I’m not really sure what difference it would make. Seems weirdly cryptic for them.”
I averted my gaze a bit awkwardly. “I’m pretty sure they’re being purposefully cryptic to avoid additional chaos and confusion.”
“Sounds like you know their identity.”
“I do, but that’s an even longer story.” I pulled them into another hug. “Speaking of which, I’m heading out to look for this person and to make sure no other civilians were missed.”
They hugged me back. “Can I go with you?”
“I appreciate the offer, but you should stay here to help watch over this street.”
“Athaeÿn—”
“I’ll be alright. Vernyth is keeping Roänach distracted.”
“Mm-hmm…” They exhaled heavily. “At least promise you’ll stay close to other Vampires so you have backup in case he sees you.”
“That’s what I’ve been doing so far.”
They nodded and squeezed me tightly. “Please be careful.”
“Of course.” I pulled back with a grin. “We can’t catch up if I’m dead.”
“Yeah, Undead is bad enough, so don’t make it worse.”
A bit late for that…
I continued down the road and waved over my shoulder as I rounded the corner, knowing full well Callyn had seen right through my excuses and deflections.
Please forgive me.
As much as I would’ve loved their company and support, I couldn’t risk their safety if Roänach came after me. He was already terrorizing the city. I didn’t want him anywhere near my best friend.
Roänach is my responsibility.
Everything seemed fine at first, but I became increasingly unnerved when each street had fewer Vampires than the previous. When I wandered into a market lane and found it completely vacant, my concern elevated to alarm.
Wait, I think I hear voices—
Knowing isolation could be a death sentence, I started running but only got halfway down the street when the vocal runes hummed again.
“Torrent.”
I skidded to a stop.
While it’s still pitch-black?!
Wasting no time, I clambered onto the four-foot-high wall to my left that lined the outer edge of the street. Once situated, I looked back up the ascending levels and saw two distinct heat signatures fly out of the mountain, one of whom appeared somewhat obscured by a smaller, dark shape. The unobscured figure proceeded to summon an enormous cloud that was nearly black in my thermal vision.
Alright, that’s Sathira—
A few moments later, the dark shape partially obscuring Elvylli gestured toward the freezing cloud, prompting her to unleash a blindingly bright and equally massive wave of fire directly at it.
Ah, so that’s what they needed Daryn for.
The force of the queens’ combined magic resulted in a torrential waterfall cascading down and flooding the streets. I could only assume the water would knock over everything and everyone in its path, especially with the subtle downslope of the roads. When the rapids arrived at my street and rushed past, however, they weren’t nearly as aggressive as I expected. The current wasn’t even fast enough to mist me.
What exactly is the point of this?
As though answering my question, the sound of crackling ice began echoing down the mountain. When I looked toward the higher end of the road, the lingering flood stopped moving and darkened in my vision as a wave of freezing passed by, leaving the entire street submerged in a layer of ice at least a foot thick. Glancing down at the adjacent street, I saw a handful of Demons and non-Vampire guards stuck in said ice but standing upright and seemingly unharmed.
Oh, that’s the point.
With running water no longer a threat, I gingerly slipped off the wall and crouched down to touch the ice with my bare hand. At most, its chill was similar to that of cool stone.
Good. The last thing we need is rampant frostbite.
The rapid flooding aspect of their plan wasn’t my favorite, but I appreciated how simple and effective the ice was. Fortunately, it was highly unlikely that any Demons who were still enthralled would be able to free themselves. Demons were strong, but Arbiter magic was stronger.
Now, we just have to deal with Roänach.
As I stood back up, my hand brushed against the wooden stake Vernyth had given me. It was still sticking out of my boot.
Shit.
My stomach plummeted.
I forgot to give it to Shade…
All of a sudden, the screeching bats overhead crashed down and reformed both Arch-Vampires at the end of my street. Vernyth was nearly incapacitated by overwhelming damage, but he did manage to prop himself up on his elbow, albeit with a severely pained groan.
Come on, get up!
Roänach wasn’t much better off but, to my dismay, was in good enough shape to crawl over to Vernyth and snatch a spare wooden stake that had fallen out of his overcoat.
No—
He shakily got to his feet and flashed a bloody grin. “Mind if I borrow this?” he sneered, kicking Vernyth in the face hard enough to break his neck before plunging the stake into his heart.
No…
My eyes burned as he went limp.
I’m so sorry, Vernyth…
As Roänach crouched down and sank his fangs into the defeated Arch-Vampire’s neck, the vocal runes hummed again.
“Daylight.”
The darkness vanished a few seconds later, leaving me and Roänach alone in the icy street.
Oh no—
Locked in wide-eyed terror, I barely noticed my vision switch back to normal all on its own.
Shade, help me—
The ice wasn’t cold, but my feet were frozen.
Please—
A painful shudder racked my body when Roänach stood with ease, having fully healed thanks to Vernyth’s Arch-Vampire blood resonating with his own.
Anyone—
The dread that consumed my entire being when he slowly turned and looked at me was indescribable. His completely blank expression was the most terrifying thing I had ever seen.
H-Help—
Chapter 31 ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 29
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Athaeÿn
It was still dark when we finally approached Soaring Sanctum, the formidable mountain decorated by the sprawling metropolis of Eidolon. From a distance, there was nothing out of the ordinary, but that meant little when it came to Roänach. He was an expert at hiding in plain sight.
I hope his arrogance finally gets the best of him.
Considering his history of patience and paranoia, he must have seen this as his best or only chance and taken it, especially if he thought Xythe died in that unknown darkness. Even if he hadn’t presumed Xythe’s death, the queens flying in that direction wouldn’t have looked good, regardless of phenomenon to investigate. What mattered was they had left Eidolon vulnerable.
Why are people like Xythe and Roänach never content with what they have?
It was a shame the former was dead. They would’ve made a perfect creepy couple.
Maybe then they would’ve been content and left people alone.
I shook my head.
No, they would’ve just enabled each other even more.
With a tired sigh, I refocused on the task ahead. After pondering for a few seconds, I glanced over at Vernyth’s bat swarm. “Are you coming with us to the citadel?”
His voice cut through the chattering. “I doubt the queens would appreciate my presence. No, I’ll be more useful looking for Roänach in the city and intervening when and if he shows himself.”
“Fair enough.”
“Here—” Some of the bats condensed into an outstretched hand clutching a wooden stake. “I know you can’t use it yourself, so give it to Tyrran once you land. I have more in my coat’s inner pockets.”
“Thank you,” I took the stake and carefully shoved it into my boot so I wouldn’t drop it, “and good luck.”
“You as well.” Once his hand separated into bats again, his swarm broke away so he could reform elsewhere.
Meanwhile, Shade readjusted his arms around me. “Most Arch-Vampires aren’t like Vernyth, right? Could Roänach have been planning with others of their kind?”
“He only mentioned Xythe, but it’s possible.” My grip tightened. “I certainly hope not.”
“Actually, if he came right here after my mothers flew over, then it’s probably just him and enthralled Demons. Forget what I said…”
I thought for a moment. “You know, we just assumed he made a break for Eidolon. We don’t actually have proof. Maybe he…” My theory ground to a halt. “No, he has to be here. He wouldn’t have passed up an opportunity like this, and I don’t think other Arch-Vampires would join him anyway.”
“Why not?”
“I get the impression they generally prefer keeping to themselves. Xythe wanted revenge but was otherwise content with his own little kingdom, and I think most Arch-Vampires feel the same way. There’s not much incentive for them to come here and risk death when they’re already sovereign individuals, even if just in secret.”
“That’s true… So, why does Roänach want Eidolon so badly?”
“He’s a self-important prick who thinks he’s entitled to whatever he wants, whether it be sex slaves, nameless servants, or excessive real estate. Apparently, an entire castle full of vassals, enthralled Demons, and helpless blood captives isn’t enough.”
Shade huffed with disgust. “Well, I think it’s about time he loses everything.”
My throat tightened. “Agreed.”
Including his life…
It wasn’t long before we reached the mountain and flew into the immense cavern sheltering the interior districts. The first thing I noticed was how sparsely populated the streets were. The sight likely would have worried some, but I was glad to see it.
Should mean less chaos when the time comes.
A couple of guards approached when we landed outside the citadel, one of whom nodded to the entrance. “The queens are in the war room.”
Wait—
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Are they expecting someone?”
“According to them, ‘an Arbiter carrying a Dark Elf.’”
The other guard raised her hand slightly. “In particular, ‘A good-looking Vampire who will refuse to be contained by a bunch of bullshit rocks,’ I believe Daryn specified. Oh, ‘and a big, red momma’s boy who will show up to help even though he was told to stay put, courtesy of his boyfriend’s nagging…’” she relayed, averting her gaze awkwardly. “Again, Daryn’s words, not mine…”
Oh.
When I peered at Shade, his eyes were wide with embarrassment.
“I, uhhh… I guess I am kind of predictable,” he muttered, trying and failing to obscure my view of his intense blush. Not even his giant hand could hide all of it.
I couldn’t help but snort an unattractive laugh. It was nice to have a brief moment of levity before everything went to shit. “You and I both, apparently.” I patted his arm and headed for the door. “Remind me to smack Daryn later.”
The things that man gets away with saying, I swear…
Shade hurried after me and took a deep breath once inside the building. “Phew… I thought there would be more people out there.”
“It tends to be less busy at night, but it did look unusually barren. I’m sure your mothers enacted some kind of plan the second they got here.”
When we entered the war room, Elvylli, Sathira, and the Captain of the Guard, who was an Inverse Demon, were busy discussing something marked on a giant map of the city painted on the back wall. A moment later, all three turned and stared at us. The queens didn’t look happy.
Uh-oh—
Shade paled and pointed a shaky finger at me. “He made me come here.”
Gee, thanks.
I glanced at the queens, but their eyes remained locked on him.
His breathing turned shallow. “A-Are you mad at me?”
Elvylli folded her arms. “For what? Wanting to help?”
Before he could say anything, she came over and pulled him into a tight hug, an embrace he returned with a sigh of relief.
Sathira approached as well and rubbed his shoulder. “We knew you wouldn’t be able to stay away, sweetheart.” Her attention shifted to me. “Desperate times call for desperate measures, hm?”
My chest tightened, but there was no use lying. “I asked Shade to get Vernyth…”
“I know.”
At least she seems more open-minded than Daryn.
She tilted her head a little. “You didn’t need to endanger yourself like this.”
“Until Roänach dies, I’m in danger no matter where he is. Besides, he’s my scumbag master. I can’t just do nothing while others deal with him for me.”
“Athaeÿn, no vassal is obligated to clean up their master’s mess.”
“I know, but I want to help… somehow…” I sighed and folded my arms. “What have you done so far? Maybe your efforts will help me think of something.”
She smiled. “You may not be able to kill Roänach, but we just so happen to have an idea that will allow you to get involved,” her gaze drifted to Shade, “and you’re the key element.”
His eyes widened. “Me?”
Elvylli finally released him from her hug. “We’ve been working on multiple plans, some of which rely on you, most of which don't. We were prepared to act if you never showed up, but now that you’re here,” she looked rather pleased, “we have the opportunity to go forward with my favorite plan.”
Shade looked anything but pleased. “Does it involve my magic?”
“It does.”
He frowned at his hand and balled it up against his chest. “No, it’s useless…”
“I think you’ll change your mind once you hear us out.”
His neck muscles tensed as he stared at the floor. When he looked at his mothers again, his eyes were misty with frustration, and his quiet, shaky voice reflected it. “I really want to help.”
Sathira smiled and caressed his cheek with her thumb. “Don’t worry, sweetheart, we’re about to tell you how.” She then turned back to the map. “Announcing a citywide lockdown was tempting, but we didn’t want to incite panic, especially without knowing Roänach’s whereabouts or the extent of his forces. Instead, we tasked the guards with discreetly encouraging people to go home and lock their doors.”
Shade looked alarmed. “But, couldn’t he just break into people’s homes?”
I glanced at him. “Vampires can’t enter private residences without direct invitation.”
“Oh. That’s… interesting.”
Sathira nodded. “Normally, we would have people shelter in the citadel, but its protection is meant for danger yet to arrive, danger we can see coming. This threat is already in the city. Flocking here would just draw attention, and we may already be compromised. We can’t risk it.”
Shade still looked worried. “Alright, but what about his enthralled Demons?” He paused and turned to me. “Is he only using Demons?”
“Probably. Almost everyone wears enchanted clothing and jewelry to protect against enthrallment, so it’s easier for him to kill people and use their souls to summon confused and vulnerable Demons. Between their superior strength and magical abilities,” my gaze drifted to the Captain of the Guard, who was likely three times stronger than me despite being a foot shorter, “they’re way more useful for him to control.”
The Captain nodded. “Especially if used to multiply his forces,” he removed one of his gauntlets and flourished his claws, “as we’re never without the tools necessary for siphoning souls.”
I couldn’t help but think of Roänach’s box of sharpened Demon bones. Having the equivalent on one’s hands would indeed be more convenient.
The Captain put his gauntlet back on and looked at Shade. “I hope to minimize such activity. With the ability to reverse enthrallment, my fellow Inverse Demons will do what they can to thin his forces. It will be a relief to do so without violence.”
Meanwhile, Elvylli joined her wife at the map. “Even if that wasn’t an option, there should be enough guards stationed throughout the city to prevent break-ins, and we’ve made it clear lethal force is an absolute last resort. After all, Roänach’s Demons are victims as well.” She said nothing for a moment. “Civilian safety is our top priority, so the goal is to get as many people out of harm’s way as possible before confronting Roänach. We have no idea how many enthralled Demons he has.” She sighed and shook her head. “He doesn’t need even more hostages.”
Shade nervously toyed with his hands. “So, what exactly is your plan, and why is it your favorite?”
“It’s my favorite because it should minimize altercations from all sides.” She turned back around to look at him. “We want you to cloak the entire city in darkness.”
His eyes shot wide with horror. “What?!”
Ah, I see where this is going.
I put my hand on his arm. “Shade, please hear them out.”
“But—”
“You’ll be helping just like you wanted. I promise.”
He took a deep breath and looked at his mothers again. “I don’t understand. No one will be able to see anything.”
Elvylli smiled. “Including the enthralled Demons. Roänach will still be able to see, but so will every Vampire in the city. They’ve spread the word amongst themselves and are prepared to guide people to safety right under the Demons’ noses. With everyone else out of reach and his backup effectively useless, we’re hoping he skips to coming after me and Sathira.”
My chest tightened. “Will Daryn be waiting to ambush him?”
Sathira grinned. “He may get that opportunity, but we need him for something else first.” Her gaze drifted to Shade. “Before I continue, what do you think so far, Tyrran?”
He swallowed hard and looked at his claws again. “I don’t have to hurt anyone?”
“Far from it, sweetheart.”
Still focused on his hand, he summoned a sphere of darkness on his palm and altered its size a few times, seemingly keeping it under perfect control. As he stared at it, the corner of his mouth pulled into a tentative smile.
I waved my hand through the void to remind him it wasn’t inherently harmful. “And, you’ll be able to help us bring people indoors.”
He briefly glanced at me before expanding the sphere to the edges of the room. When he dismissed it, he looked at his mothers with cautious optimism. “I think I can do it.”
Sathira tilted her head slightly. “Are you absolutely sure? We would never force you.”
His smile brightened. “If I can really help that many people, then yes, I want to.”
“Thank you, sweetheart.” She beamed with pride for a moment before turning more serious. “In the meantime, Elvylli and I will be here using the vocal rune network to announce important code words. If you hear blackout, it means Tyrran should darken the city. If you hear daylight, it means the darkness can be retracted, but don’t let the term worry you. It should still be nighttime.”
I nodded. “Good to know. Any others?”
“Just one, and arguably the most important. If you hear torrent, every Vampire needs to get off the ground immediately. I suggest the sturdy walls separating the streets.”
I don’t like the sound of that.
“Now then,” she gestured to the door, “you two should head out and take up good positions. There’s no telling when Roänach will strike, and I’d rather you be ready and waiting instead of scrambling.”
Shade put a hand on my shoulder. “I want you to come with me.”
I looked up at him and shook my head. “You need to go wherever you’re needed most, and I won’t be able to keep up.”
“But, you can’t defend yourself against Roänach.”
“The other Vampires will have my back.” I rested my hand on his. “Shade, I appreciate your concern for my safety, truly, but I don’t want to be treated like a fragile doll who can’t take care of myself. I need you to have a little more faith in me. Please.”
His eyes widened a little, but, instead of arguing, he managed a worried smile. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
“Thank you.” After gesturing for him to lean down, I gripped his intact horn and pulled him in for a kiss. “Now shoo. I’m sure we’ll run into each other during the chaos.”
“At least promise me you’ll be safe.”
“I promise.”
He nuzzled my face before smiling at his mothers. “You too.”
Sathira smiled back. “Of course, sweetheart. You as well.”
Elvylli waved. “You’ve got this.”
He summoned one last sphere of darkness in his hand and stared at it. “I’ve got this.” By the time he dismissed it, he was smiling brightly. “I can do it. I can help everyone!”
As Shade dissolved into a large shadow on the floor and rushed out, Elvylli spoke up behind me. “Good luck, Athaeÿn. Take care of yourself out there.”
My gaze was still locked on the threshold. “I’ll try.”
“Roänach will be dead before sunrise. You have my word.”
I nodded tensely. “Thank you.”
This is it.
Chapter 30 ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 28
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Athaeÿn
To my surprise, there was no illusion shrouding the cave entrance.
The coachman probably told the others to hide.
My throat tightened.
Xiir…
I still couldn’t believe it.
Escapes one Arch-Vampire only to be snatched up by another.
And seeing Daryn so upset just made things infinitely worse.
I promise Xiir will be free.
Shaking my head, I looked around and failed to spot a single Demon. It was an odd sight after three hundred years of the opposite.
Stellar guard work.
Halfway through the glowing gardens, a voice unknown to Shade but all too familiar to me called out from off to one side.
“Athaeÿn!”
When I turned to see Fiella running toward us, my relief seeing her safe and sound was immeasurable.
Thank the gods.
Her eyes were already brimming with tears when she skidded to a stop just a few feet in front of me. It was evident in her fidgeting she could barely contain herself. “Y-You’re back!”
Without a word, I smiled and pulled her into a hug. As expected, some anxiety resurfaced, but it was a whisper compared to before I left.
I’m sorry this took so long, Fiella.
She froze and gasped sharply. “A-Athaeÿn, you’re hugging me—” After a brief pause, she buried her face in my chest and squeezed me tightly. “You’re really hugging me!”
I chuckled at her muffled voice and the sound of her feet pattering excitedly. “Not entirely free of my issues, but more than enough for now.”
“I’m so happy for you!” The moment she pulled back and looked up, her eyes widened fearfully. “Wh-Who is that?”
Did she really not notice him until now?
I couldn’t help but grin. “Fiella, this is Tyrran. He’s my… uhh…” When I glanced at him, he just blinked a few times. “Well, let’s just say he’s a special friend I met on my trip.” I turned back to her with another smile. “It’s a long story.”
Before she could say anything, another familiar voice sounded.
“Special friend, huh?”
My gaze was met with an infuriating smug grin. “Yes, Haana.”
Her smirk was long gone by the time she stopped next to Fiella. She hadn’t looked away from me once. “I never thought I’d see you hug anyone ever again.”
“Neither did I.”
We both smiled and shared our first embrace in centuries.
She gave me a squeeze. “But I always hoped I would,” she added softly, leaning her head on mine. “I’m so glad you found yourself again.”
Despite lingering unease, her touch was more comforting than anything. “I’m still working on it, but thank you.”
Hopefully, this is just the beginning.
Once we released each other, I stepped back so I could see them both. “Alright, Tyrran and I need to grab something from Roänach’s study real quick. If you two don’t mind waiting, I’d love to catch up afterward.”
Fiella’s eyes widened again. “You’re going to steal from him? I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
I offered a reassuring smile. “I promise it’s for a good reason, but I’ll explain when we come back out.”
Halfway to the fortress, I noticed a distinct lack of footsteps behind me.
Again?
I was less than surprised to glance back and find Shade still in front of Fiella and Haana. Admittedly, the huge smile on his face was adorable.
He extended both hands in greeting. “Hi, nice to meet you.”
Haana returned a polite smile and shook one of his hands. “The feeling is mutual.”
Meanwhile, Fiella openly gawked at his other hand while gripping it with both of hers. His massive claws dwarfed her fingers. “Whooaaa…” Eventually, she looked up at him with a guilty smile. “Sorry for being afraid of you at first.”
His grin never wavered. “It’s alright. I doubt you’ll be the last.”
“At least you’re nice. That should help!”
Their meeting was cute, but I had to cut it short. “Tyrran, we have a schedule to keep!”
“Ooo—” He pulled his hands free and waved to them. “We can talk more later. Bye!” Once he caught up, we entered the castle together. “Sorry, I was just introducing myself.”
“And that was very polite of you, but we’ve dawdled too much already,” I shook my head a little, “which, to be fair, is mostly my fault.”
“To be fairer, it was my fault first when I refused to leave.”
“Fairest enough.” When we arrived at Roänach’s study, I stopped and gestured to the closed door. “Mind slipping under and unlocking it for me?”
He just stared at it for a few seconds. “Want me to violently break it down instead?”
I was about to turn down his offer but paused and glanced at the door again. A door I despised with every fiber of my being. “You know what? I think I would enjoy that, actually.”
He giggled mischievously and rubbed his hands together before reeling back and obliterating the door with a single, devastating punch. “Ow…” He shook his hand a few times and grinned at me. “Satisfying?”
“Very much so. Thank you.” The crunch of wood debris beneath my boots was music to my ears as I entered and pulled a large, annotated map off the wall. When I returned to Shade, I stood so we could both see it. “Let’s see, where is… Ah—” I pointed to a landmark on the map that wasn’t too far from our current location. “Their hideout was in here, an abandoned mine called the Iron Abyss.”
“That’s a cool name.”
“It is. Callyn described the entrance as an adit in a hillside, and, if I remember correctly, there should be ruins of the adjoining town in the surrounding area. As long as you stay on course, you shouldn’t miss it.”
He nodded and took the map to study it. “What should I say to convince Vernyth to help?”
“Apparently, Callyn asked him to help look for me a while back, so just mentioning my name would probably be enough.”
“And if that doesn’t work?”
“Then tell him about Roänach summoning Demons in Eidolon. I know it’s just speculation, but I would stake my life on it.” I thought for a moment. “Demons or no Demons, many of his fellow vassals probably still live in the capital, so a more characteristic Arch-Vampire like Roänach stalking those streets should help convince him as well, even if he hasn’t spoken to said vassals in centuries. After all, they used to be friends.”
“Alright. Hopefully, your name will be enough.”
I nodded and squeezed past his large frame. “Come on. The sooner you recruit Vernyth, the sooner we get to Eidolon.”
And the sooner we kill Roänach…
After exiting the fortress and passing through the glowing gardens, we stopped just shy of the innermost barrier and stood facing each other.
Shade cradled my head with one hand, as the map was rolled up in his other. “The whole point of shutting down the runes was so I didn’t have to leave you behind, yet here I am leaving anyway.” His face was tense with worry. “Are you sure there’s nothing else we can do?”
I smiled and leaned into his touch. “If there were options, do you really think my first choice would be seeking out another Arch-Vampire?”
He exhaled a weak laugh through his nose. “I suppose not…”
“If it makes you feel any better, an efficient trip to and from the Iron Abyss should land you back here before your mothers even reach Eidolon. Meaning, if their arrival spooks Roänach into fleeing, you’ll have already returned to protect me.”
His tension seemed to ease a little, but he still looked unconvinced.
My hand found his wrist and held it gently. “I’ll be fine. The other vassals are my friends, the Demons aren’t allowed to touch us, and the only real threat isn’t going to show up while you’re gone.” I caressed his hand with my thumb. “Everything will work out.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
He finally managed another smile as he dropped to one knee and pulled me in for a kiss, which he held for a few seconds before resting his forehead against mine. “You’re almost free.”
I shivered from the resonance of his deep voice against my lips. “There’s only one person in the way.”
“He’s been in your way for a long time. Too long.” He nuzzled my face with his. “No matter what happens, I’ll make sure he never hurts you again.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
Despite the dread in my heart, I smiled and hugged his head to mine. “I’ll be here.”
“And I’ll be back.”
He kissed me one last time and headed out.
It’s just for a couple of hours…
As I stood there with my hand on my chest, Lune’s warmth helped soothe my nerves. My heart remained silent, but it wasn’t quite as cold and dead anymore. I almost felt alive again.
You’ll watch over Shade while he’s gone, right?
There was a surge of warmth in my chest.
Thank you, Lune—
“Special friend indeed.”
Gods—!
Fiella’s voice scared the shit out of me, but my surprise turned to annoyance when I glanced back only to find two smirks this time. I felt like a teenager being caught making out. “Wha-uhhhh, y-yeah? So, what?”
Haana put her hands on her hips. “Relax, Athaeÿn.”
“Yeah, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” Fiella added with a tiny giggle. “I think you two are really cute together.”
“O-Oh. Well, uh, thank you…” I rubbed the back of my neck awkwardly. “I may have downplayed how important he was to me…”
Haana’s brows went up. “Noooo—”
“Shush. You’re being a bad influence.”
Fiella was practically squinting with smugness. “She had nothing to do with my comment.”
“I don’t appreciate being ganged up on.”
Haana leaned forward a little. “You’ll live.” She said nothing for a moment. “This may be even more shocking than the hugs.”
“Believe me, I’m as surprised as you are. Now then,” I waved my hand dismissively, “if you’ve both had your fill of teasing me, I have some important details to share.” My gaze drifted to Fiella. “But first, has the lunelight helped?”
“It has. The three of us sit around it every night before we go to bed.”
“The three of you?”
Her smile never wavered as she gestured to get someone’s attention.
When I looked over, I was surprised to see Lánelli of all people approaching. Her eyes weren’t the icy blue I remembered.
Damn, she did go through with it.
She stopped at Fiella’s other side. “Athaeÿn, right?”
I was still a bit dumbstruck but managed a nod.
She nodded back. “Glad to see you intact.”
“Thank you.” I kept any jokes about the contrary to myself so as not to worry Fiella. “I must admit—”
“You’re confused.”
I opened my mouth but didn’t get the chance to reply.
“Understandable, considering how I spoke to you when we first met. I apologize for being so insufferable.”
“It’s alright. What changed?”
“My entire perception of this place.” She shot a disapproving glance at the ceiling. “I knew Roänach would have vassals, but I was under the impression they were loyal followers and lovers who willingly became Vampires.” She sighed and thumbed one of her new fangs. “I’m an idiot, I know.”
It hurt my heart to hear her say that. “He’s a really good liar.”
“Maybe. Doesn’t change how stupid I feel.”
I nodded glumly. “I can relate more than I care to admit.”
There was a brief pause before she put her arm around Fiella’s shoulders and lightly jostled her. “And to think, I accused this little darling of jealousy.”
I couldn’t help but smile when Fiella giggled a little. “I’m glad to see you’ve grown so close.”
“It was effortless after Roänach’s illusion of grandeur shattered. The first line he crossed was my realization about the other vassals. I thought you were all miserable because he named me his new favorite, but the first time he took the back of his hand to my face, I knew why you were actually miserable. That slap was the second line he crossed. Admittedly, I enjoy men with a dark side, sinister aesthetic, whatever you want to call it, but I don’t tolerate abuse.
“Fiella was the first to offer comfort after he slapped me, which was all it took to set aside our differences. She reminds me of my little sister Deänna.” Lánelli paused to smile at Fiella but became even more serious when her attention returned to me. “The third and final line Roänach crossed was when he threatened her. That was the end of it. Luckily, he was still obsessed with me, so I took the liberty of keeping him occupied as much as possible.”
My brows went up a bit. “Did it work?”
“As far as I can tell. He and I were joined at the hip until a few days ago.” She rolled her eyes. “A bit too literally for my liking, but it made my job easier.”
I sighed and shook my head. “Then you succeeded where I failed.” When I glanced at Fiella, she looked sad instead of confused. “How long have you known?”
Her gaze fell. “I had a vague suspicion after some weird comments you and Haana made, but Lánelli confirmed it after Roänach left.”
“Let me guess. He bragged about knowing my motive all along, right?”
Lánelli nodded. “It was sickening to listen to.”
“I can imagine.” I shook my head and forced a smile. “Anyway, thank you for trying to protect the others while I was gone.”
“You’re welcome. I’ve made many mistakes in my life, but none quite this permanent. I really fucked myself this time.” She sighed and ran her tongue over her fangs. “Oh well. At least I got the chance to do some good before he left, though I still have no idea where he went.”
“That’s actually what I was about to discuss before you came over.” I refocused on Fiella and Haana. “I sent Tyrran to fetch Vernyth, a neutral Arch-Vampire some of my friends are vassals to. Once he deactivates the containment runes, we’re going to Eidolon to kill Roänach.”
Fiella’s eyes shot wide. “Are you serious?”
Haana looked surprised too, but Lánelli just nodded with approval.
“Yes. He’s finally going to answer for everything he’s done.”
“W-We’re going to be free?”
“That’s the plan.”
Fiella teared up and wrung her hands together. “I’m really going to see my family again? My friends? My boyfriend? Even my cats?”
I smiled and nodded. “Everyone.”
As Fiella broke down sobbing, Lánelli pulled her into a tight hug. “I have to introduce you to Deänna. You’ll love her.”
“O-Only if you both agree to meet Joryn and my cats.”
“Cats first.”
Fiella giggled through a tiny sob. “Okay.”
It was nice to see her hope rekindled, but the mention of her family once again reminded me of my parents.
I need to find them.
With so much time having passed, I couldn’t shake the fear of them wanting nothing to do with me.
But I have to at least try, even if it’s just for closure.
I hung my head a little.
If they even remember me…
…
As we waited in the glowing gardens, Fiella finally got to teach me how to make flower crowns. The learning curve was steeper than expected. She beamed with pride when I finished one all by myself, then applauded when it stayed intact once set on my head. I likely felt more accomplished than I should have.
Just as I was about to start a second one for Shade, there was an unfamiliar sound behind me. I glanced over my shoulder just in time to see the two primary containment runes on either side of the cave mouth brighten with a loud hum before going dark and silent.
It worked?
Not a second later, Shade flew in and landed next to us. “Found him!”
His cheerful announcement was followed by the sound of rushing wind as a large swarm of bats poured into the cave. The chattering cloud rapidly condensed and transformed into a middle-aged Human with a neatly trimmed silver beard, equally metallic hair tied back in a loose knot, a dark patch over his left eye, and the skin tone of bronzed terracotta. His Arch-Vampire status was confirmed by the black fang markings on his forehead. I had never seen him before, but he was exactly what I expected.
Callyn described him quite accurately.
Vernyth settled next to Shade and glanced down at me. “So, this is where you ended up, eh?”
I nodded. “The worst decision I ever made.”
He returned a nod and looked at the ground. “Yeah…”
As I stood to face him better, I couldn’t help but note his furrowed brows creasing the symbol on his forehead. “Most of them forgive you.”
He shook his head. “I don’t deserve it, but my opinion is irrelevant. If they wish to grant me that, I won’t argue, even if I disagree.” His gaze slowly lifted to meet mine. “Regardless, I didn’t come here to sulk. I came to help.”
“You already have by deactivating the runes.”
“Which is all well and good, but it’s not enough.” He paused and shook his head again. “When Callyn asked me to look for you, I did nothing. Only when I traveled for myself did I keep a vague eye out, but it would be a stretch to consider what I did actually looking.”
His gaze drifted off to the side. “Many years ago, I passed through this area once or twice. I sensed the runes and wondered if you had been snatched up by whatever Arch-Vampire laid claim to the area, but I didn’t investigate much further. It was nothing less than shameful. Even if I knew you weren’t here, I should have done everything in my power to help anyone else held captive. Instead, I did nothing.”
He hung his head miserably. “I damned my friends the moment I drank our master’s blood. Because I stay out of their lives, they essentially have the same freedom as any truly liberated Vampire, but it doesn’t matter. They’re still tied to me and will be as long as I live.” It took a few moments for him to look at me again. “I’m sick of wallowing in isolation as a reprehensible coward. Tyrran told me everything, and I wish to help you defeat Roänach. If you’ll have me.”
At first, all I could do was stare in shock.
No wonder Callyn defended him.
“I accept and appreciate your help, more than you’ll ever know.” I paused for a moment. “You’re truly willing to risk your life for this?”
“I am, but don’t give me too much credit. I’m risking nothing of value.” He averted his gaze again. “To be clear, Roänach’s death is the only one I seek, but if he kills me first, so be it. At least I’ll have died trying to do the right thing for once.”
I offered a small smile. “Well, whatever happens, thank you.”
He just nodded and headed back to the cave mouth to wait.
Once Vernyth was out of earshot, Shade leaned down closer to my ear. “I couldn’t get him to smile once,” he whispered, sounding bummed.
“Don’t blame yourself. He doesn’t have much to smile about,” I whispered back. “Hopefully, this will be a new beginning for him.”
Trying to make up for past mistakes seems like a good start.
All of a sudden, Fiella’s voice sounded behind us. “What can we do to help?”
I turned to find her, Haana, and Lánelli now standing. “Stay here and be safe. Please.”
Fiella pouted. “That’s not helping.”
“I know, but Tyrran can’t carry all of us.” I grinned at him before pulling her into a hug. “I have no idea what to expect, but knowing you’re out of harm’s way will help put my mind at ease.”
She nodded reluctantly and clung to me. “Please be safe too.”
“This will all be over soon…” Once we released each other, I took the small portrait out of my boot and handed it to her. “Will you hold on to this for me?”
She clutched it to her chest and blinked away a few tears. “Y-You have to come back for it.”
A light chuckle slipped out. “That is my intention.”
“P-Promise.”
Seeing the fear in her eyes, I pulled her into another hug and held the back of her head. “I promise I’ll be alright. I came back this time, didn’t I?”
After dying horribly…
She sniffled and buried her face in my chest. “Don’t let Roänach win.”
“He’s about to be the biggest loser in all of Terraen.” When we separated, I took off my flower crown and set it on her head. “Do you have any idea how hard I worked on that? Now I really have to come back.”
She cracked a small smile and huddled into Lánelli’s arms instead, still clutching the portrait as if her life depended on it.
Meanwhile, Haana offered a tense nod. “Good luck, Athaeÿn.”
“Thank you.”
We’ll need it.
After saying our see-you-laters, we joined Vernyth near the exit.
I stood in front of Shade and patted his arm. “When we reach Eidolon, we’ll go straight to the citadel to find out what’s happening. That’s most likely where your mothers will be.”
“Alright, but what if Roänach escapes and comes back here?” He glanced over his shoulder at Fiella, Haana, and Lánelli. “I’m glad I don’t have to leave you behind, but now I’m worried about them.”
“Just beat him here. You can move faster as a shadow than he can fly as a swarm of bats.”
“You think so?”
“I know so, but we’ll make sure it doesn’t come to that.”
He still looked concerned but didn’t argue as he turned back around and secured me to his chest. “I don’t feel good…”
“I don’t either. We’ll feel better once this is over.”
“I hope you’re right.”
As Shade flew out of the cave into the cool night air, I was relieved not to be ripped from his arms by an invisible wall.
Wow, it really did work.
Unfortunately, this brief satisfaction was swiftly razed by the two warring factions within me. One wanted nothing more than to confront Roänach. The other wanted to avoid it at all costs. Both used my broken heart as the battlefield.
At least I don’t have to kill him myself.
Even if that was an option, I wasn’t sure I could do it. Thinking about it was one thing. Doing it was another entirely. It didn’t matter how much I hated him.
Please just let this nightmare finally end…
Chapter 29 ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 27
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Athaeÿn
The next morning was anything but peaceful. In a good way, this time.
Daryn, Elvylli, Sathira, and I sat watching a bunch of kids running around the hall. At first glance, it looked like they were being chased by some invisible entity, but they were actually fleeing an amorphous shadow on the ground. Every now and then, a clawed hand would shoot out of the darkness and grab one of their tails just long enough for them to squeal with laughter before letting go and vanishing again.
Definitely the most unique game of tag I’ve ever seen.
While exploring his magic the previous day, Shade had discovered the ability to turn into an artificial shadow in any amount of light. This hadn’t been possible without his soul, and he wasted no time making up for it.
The kids are certainly enjoying his new ability.
I glanced at the queens every now and then as they watched, and I couldn’t help but smile at the faint tears of joy in their eyes. I knew exactly what they were thinking and feeling.
Better late than never.
Eventually, Shade reformed his full body and scooped up ten or so kids in a big embrace. It was an easy feat with his strength and huge arm span. “I win!”
“No fair!” Xian complained from within the bundle.
“You’re just jealous of how cool my shadow magic is.”
“Am not! My solar magic’s way cooler!”
Daryn scoffed and shielded his eyes. “My thermal vision dictates otherwise.”
“Why are you taking his side?!”
“I’m just stating facts.”
“Traitor.”
Shade snorted a laugh and set all the kids down. “Alright, that’s enough for now.”
Xian folded his arms and looked directly up at him. “You didn’t say the magic word.”
“Please?”
“No.”
Shade thought for a moment before grinning and mimicking Daryn’s two-armed gesture from the previous night. “Disperse!”
With that, the kids scattered and ran off laughing just like last time.
Daryn pretended to choke up again. “Still legendary.”
“Still egotistical,” Elvylli mumbled.
“Still mean.”
Now free of children, Shade came over and sat with us. “What’s the plan for today? Are we practicing my magic again?”
Sathira nodded. “We are, and then we’re heading to Castle Veil once the sun has set. It’s still cloudy, but we’re playing it safe.”
He looked alarmed before she even finished speaking. “Wha-really? Already?”
“Yes, two days of practice will suffice for now. I know that sounds irresponsible, but I’m starting to regret leaving Eidolon without at least one Arbiter. The city is in good hands regardless of our presence… and yet…” She shook her head. “I can’t shake the feeling we’ve been gone too long.”
“Oh…” His gaze fell. “I’m sorry for being such a slow learner…”
“No, sweetheart, don’t apologize. You’re actually quite an efficient learner. Even if you weren’t, Elvylli and I are the only ones to blame if something bad happens in our absence.” She offered a reassuring smile. “Pay no mind to my anxiety. I’ve always been a bit of a worrier, often without merit, but I admit Roänach has been haunting my thoughts from the moment I learned of him.” She sighed and shook her head. “I’m sure I’ll feel better once he’s dealt with.”
Shade still looked concerned. “Alright… You’re sure you don’t want to go now?”
She nodded this time. “I believe it will be best to approach under cover of night, though we may wait until sunrise to confront him. At the very least, that would prevent him from fleeing if we had trouble killing him.”
“What if it’s still cloudy?”
When Sathira looked to me for input, I glanced at Shade to reply for her. “I’m honestly not sure if he would risk escape during the day, even if it was dark and stormy. Maybe if he was desperate enough. Regardless, I agree we should wait until morning.”
He stared at me for a few moments before sighing at his hand. “Magic or no magic, I thought I would be more excited to get rid of him, but I’ve never killed anyone before.” He dropped his hand into his lap. “I don’t look forward to confronting him.”
“I don’t think anyone does. Not even me.” I hung my head a little. “Despite how much I hate him, I dread his fate even more. I can’t articulate every reason why, but I accept his end if it means saving countless others.”
Daryn glanced between us. “I’m sure our capable queens will gladly snuff him out for you.” He side-eyed Elvylli. “Hopefully, with a little less screaming this time. However, if my assumption is proven wrong, I’ll gladly kill him myself.”
Elvylli smirked at him. “Since when are you capable of violence?”
“Since I took personal umbrage with every single Arch-Vampire in existence. This is simply the first opportunity handed right to me.”
“I know you choose playful violence in conversation, but I was under the impression you were otherwise harmless.”
“Peaceful, not harmless. True, I’m generally not a fighter, but, given the chance, I would drive a stake through Roänach’s heart before he could even open his cursed mouth. The only reason I didn’t kill Rialla was the fact I literally couldn’t as one of her bound vassals.” He sighed heavily. “I owe Xiir everything…”
After a brief lull of silence, Shade glanced at me again. “Everything will be better once Roänach is gone, right?”
Gods, I hope so.
I offered a smile that was a bit forced. “Yes. I promise.”
He fiddled with his claws for a second before nodding and turning to his mothers. “Alright, let’s go practice some more.”
Sathira returned a nod then smiled at me. “We’ll be back a little before sunset.”
Once the Arbiters were gone, I turned to Daryn with a smirk. “So, are you running Daryn’s Demon Daycare again?”
Before he could answer, a small group of kids all shouting various questions ran up to him. “I don’t think it’s up to me,” he whisper-hissed in my general direction, looking pained as he did so.
His pretend agony didn’t fool me. I had witnessed firsthand how much he enjoyed telling stories to them.
Either way, he’s in for another long day of talking.
…
Just as promised, the three Arbiters returned when the sky began to darken, and the queens requested everyone gather in the entry hall for an announcement. They would be sending quite a few of Eidolon’s most experienced counselors to speak with them. In particular, those specializing in post-enthrallment recovery. The Demons promptly expressed sincere gratitude.
Afterward, all the kids crowded around Shade and Daryn.
Xian looked angry, but he was betrayed by the tears in his eyes. “Do you really have to go?”
Daryn nodded. “I’m afraid so, sunshine.”
“I don’t want you to.”
“I know, but there are more enthralled Demons and other captives who need our help. Surely, you can appreciate the importance of freeing them.”
Xian folded his arms and halfheartedly kicked the floor. “I guess…”
Daryn almost looked sad as he watched him. “Hey, don’t be such a pouty puss.” He put his hands on his hips. “You really think this is the last time we’ll see each other?”
Xian slowly looked up at him.
“I said I would put in a good word for you to visit Fae’s Embrace, but… What if I took you there myself someday?”
“Really?!”
“Perhaps.” Daryn waggled a finger. “If you promise to behave until then.” He had barely finished speaking when Xian hugged him tightly, drawing a sharp gasp from him. “This was a mistake—”
A wave of secondhand touch anxiety washed over me just from watching him freeze. “Are you alright?” I whispered just loud enough for him to hear.
He nodded and glanced down at Xian. After hesitating a moment, he awkwardly returned the hug and patted the little Solar Demon’s head. “You’re welcome.”
Hopefully, he doesn’t have the same issues I have.
As Daryn partook in what looked like the first affectionate hug in his entire life, Shade and I were distracted by the tiny Starlight Demon youngling he had interacted with the first day.
The little one barely reached Shade’s knee as he hugged his leg. “You’ll come visit, right?”
Shade smiled down at him. “Of course, Xyn. You know I would never abandon you.”
Xyn let go and reached up with both arms. “Can I be tall one more time?”
Shade beamed and sat Xyn on his shoulder like before. “Look out, everyone!” He spun around and ran outside. “Tallest Demon in the world coming through!”
Daryn sighed with relief when Xian let go and followed Shade with all the other kids. “Phew. Thank you, Tyrran…”
I smirked at him. “You really are a drama queen.”
“Naturally.”
When the rest of us also made our way outside, Sathira signaled for Shade to rein it in. His reluctance was obvious when he stopped running and set Xyn down, but he didn’t hesitate to kneel and use his wings to sweep the children into a big group hug.
Xyn clung to him. “You really promise to come back?”
“I do.” After gently prying Xyn off, he slowly got up and smiled at the kids. “Like you did for Daryn, you all promise to be good while I’m gone, right?”
“We do!”
Shade’s eyes were misty by the time he turned to the adults. “Please be well.”
Xyn’s mother spoke for everyone. “You as well, Tyrran. Thank you for helping set us free.”
“Thank Athaeÿn.” He pulled me into a side-hug. “Without him, neither I nor my mothers would have gotten the chance.”
My chest tightened a little but was quickly soothed by a small surge of warmth.
And I have you to thank for my second chance, Lune.
I could have sworn there was the faintest whisper of a familiar coo from deep in my chest, but I was probably just imagining things.
Meanwhile, Sathira waved from nearby. “Are we all ready to head out?”
Instead of answering, Shade just stood there gazing at the castle.
I looked up at him and hugged his arm. “You alright?”
He stayed silent for a moment. “This place is all I’ve ever known. I’ve already come and gone a few times, but…” He let out a long, shaky exhale. “Yes, I’m alright. I’m ready to leave.”
“Are you sure?”
He smiled down at me. “I promised I would visit, so this isn’t really goodbye. Besides, it already feels different,” he gestured to the Demons, “and they’re worth coming back for.”
I smiled back. “I’m glad you think so.”
As Shade and Elvylli secured me and Daryn for flight, all the kids waved to us. “Bye, Tyrran! Bye, Uncle Daryn!”
Daryn waved back. “Farewell, children!”
Shade did the same. “Take care, everyone!”
This is it—
Fortunately, the small portrait of myself fit snugly into my thigh-high boot, so both hands were free to grip Shade’s arms when he launched into the air. The moment his feet left the ground, I gasped and dug my fingernails into his skin. Luckily, he didn’t seem to mind.
If he even noticed.
Once the initial shock faded, a huge smile came to my face as we cleared the canopy and ascended high above the forest. There had been a sense of liberation atop the coach, but this was something else entirely. I had never felt so free.
But I’m not yet.
A pit formed in my stomach.
And I won’t be until Roänach is dead.
For the first time in three hundred years, an end to my ordeal was in sight. Unfortunately, it didn’t come with the elation I wanted. It was old news that everyone’s freedom would cost Roänach his life, but as reality began to set in, my persistent dread was heavier than ever.
I just want this over and done with…
…
Our two-hour journey to Mount Umbra felt longer than my five-day trip to Xythe’s castle, and every second was riddled with twice the anxiety. The nausea was becoming unbearable.
Please let this end quickly.
I swallowed my discomfort and waved to get the others’ attention. “I’m not sure how far the patrolling Demons go, but I think we can get away with hiding around the side of the mountain until morning. If the sun finally comes out, I trust Shade to protect me and Daryn.”
Elvylli nodded. “Works for me.”
Because her hands were free, Sathira was able to gesture to us. “Would you and Tyrran like to remain outside when the time comes? It wouldn’t hurt to have external backup, but I mainly ask in case it would be too much to witness Roänach's death.”
I swallowed hard and shook my head. “No, I… I want immediate proof.” A shaky exhale forced its way out of my tight throat. “I need to see him die with my own eyes.”
“Wish I could’ve seen Rialla die both times,” Daryn chimed in flatly.
I glanced over at him but said nothing.
For once, I envy your coldblooded attitude.
It wasn’t long before we landed in a sheltered location away from the cave’s hidden entrance. Fortunately, there were no patrolling Demons in sight.
Hopefully, that means this spot is secluded enough.
As we settled in, I glanced at some large rocks a ways out from where we were. They had no markings, but I could sense the familiar magic oozing from them. “Well, I’m stuck inside our containment runes again, so I hope this goes smoothly.”
Daryn hummed in thought for a moment. “If I ever have the displeasure of meeting Vernyth face-to-face, maybe I could be persuaded to let him live, if he offers to locate and shut down more of these runes.”
“Are you even capable of giving him a chance?”
“I promise nothing.”
“Did I use the word promise?” I smiled before I could stop myself. “Either way, one Arch-Vampire at a time.”
He just folded his arms and blew a raspberry at me.
“And we should probably be quiet while we wait.”
“Until morning? Such prolonged silence will surely kill me.”
My grin turned into a smirk. “Good thing you’re already dead.”
The offended look on his face was priceless, but he did relent and go silent.
For ten whole minutes.
“This is boring,” he whispered, shooting a glare at me.
“Bring a book next time,” I whispered back.
He opened his mouth to reply but hesitated and turned slightly to one side. When he narrowed his eyes and tilted his head, I knew he was listening for something.
Uh-oh.
A few seconds later, I heard sniffing from around the corner.
Shit, it’s one of the Fauna Demons—
After gesturing for Elvylli, Sathira, and Daryn to wait, I turned to Shade and beckoned him to follow me.
Without a word, he nodded and dissolved into my shadow.
Ideal compensation for his gigantic body’s lack of stealth.
Cautiously peeking around the outcrop, I spotted none other than the coachman about twenty feet away. He was still sniffing the air, but, luckily, his back was to me for the moment.
Well, his presence is a good indication Roänach is here.
That was what we wanted, but it just made my nausea worse.
Get it over with.
Taking a deep breath, I left my position of cover and headed right for him. I hoped my false confidence would be convincing.
A moment later, he turned and nearly fell over from the force of his double take. “Athaeÿn?!” The look on his face was priceless. “What the— Where did— How— Why are you here?!”
I shrugged. “Xythe was an asshole, so I left.”
“How did you get past the solar shield and make it back without the coach?”
“None of your business.”
“I’m on patrol. It is absolutely my business.”
“Whatever. I’m sure Roänach will ask the same stupid questions.”
“And then some,” he scoffed. “Either way, your interrogation will have to wait.”
My chest tightened. “What do you mean?”
“He left a few days ago.”
“What?!”
The coachman winced and rubbed his ear. “Fucking relax… Sheesh…” He shook his head as if dislodging my shriek. “Anyway, the patrol at the time saw the queens of Eidolon fly over, and Roänach got really agitated for some reason when they told him. He left right away as a swarm of bats, so it must’ve been urgent.”
It felt like my organs were about to implode. “Did he say where he was going?”
“Nope.”
The lack of confirmation changed nothing. I knew exactly where he went.
This isn’t happening—
Before I could say anything else, Shade rematerialized behind me and lightly tapped my shoulder. “Does this mean our plan is useless?”
The coachman took a wary step back and pointed a shaky claw at Shade. “Wh-What the fuck is that?”
“Um, an Arbiter?”
Shade had barely finished speaking when the coachman spun around and fled in the direction of the cave.
There was a moment of silence. “Did he not see my mothers too? I look pretty similar to them…”
As I stood there fuming, multiple sets of footsteps approached from behind.
Sathira’s dismayed voice sounded first. “I knew one of us should’ve stayed in Eidolon.”
Nearly immobilized by rage and disgust, it took me a few seconds to forcibly turn myself around. “Roänach has visited the city many times over the centuries. I bet he’s been summoning and enthralling Demons right under your noses.”
Elvylli’s horns glowed red-hot to the point of smoking. “Every missing citizen…” Her fists clenched and trembled at her sides. “How many were killed by him?”
I was going to be sick at any moment.
How did this never occur to me—
It was then I noticed Daryn standing motionless nearby, staring wide-eyed in the direction the coachman went. The look on his face rivaled Shade’s horror when Xythe revealed his true nature. I had never seen such a raw expression on him before.
Did I miss something?
I started to worry when he remained frozen. “Daryn?”
He didn’t react at all.
“Are you alright?”
When he finally spoke, his voice was a broken whisper. “That was Xiir.”
What—
I briefly glanced in the same direction before turning back to him, only to find his eyes brimming with tears.
Oh no…
All of a sudden, his face twisted into a grimace of murderous intent. “Roänach was already fucking dead, but now,” a single tear came down his cheek as he bared his fangs, “this just became personal.”
Elvylli also looked like she was about to explode. “Tyrran, you stay behind. Roänach will not escape the city, but if he somehow does, I need you here to protect Athaeÿn and the other captives. Sathira and I will deal with that bastard ourselves.”
“With my help,” Daryn hissed.
Shade’s eyes widened, but he nodded without protest.
Meanwhile, I was stuck in my own catatonic state of disbelief. By the time I snapped out of it, the queens had taken off with Daryn and were far out of earshot.
Damn it all—
Before I could stop myself, I ran to the containment stones from earlier and reached forward until my hand pressed against an unyielding, invisible wall. I had expected as much, but the confirmation only enraged me further.
Fuck—!
I let out a sharp growl of anger and slammed my fist on the barrier. When I turned back around, it was just in time to see Shade come to a stop in front of me, but I pointed in the direction his mothers went before he could say anything. “Go with them.”
His worried expression snapped to confusion. “What? No, they told me to stay here.”
“I don’t care what they said. They might need your help.”
“But I don’t want them to get mad at me.”
“They’re not Xythe!”
He flinched back half a step and averted his gaze.
Shit—
I took a long, shaky breath. “I-I’m sorry, Shade, I didn’t mean to yell. I just—” I shook my head and dragged my hands down my face. “We were so close, and things took the worst possible turn. Barrier or no barrier, I can’t stop Roänach myself,” I lowered my hands and looked up at him, “but you can.”
When he turned back to me, he still seemed a bit shaken.
“Please, Shade.”
He shook his head. “I’m not leaving you here.”
“I’ll be fine.”
“Not if he escapes and comes back.”
“If you deal with him in the city, we won’t have to worry about that.”
“I’m not risking it.”
“Shade, we don’t have time to argue about this. Every second we waste here is another second he could be using to summon more Demons.”
He tensed and looked away again. “My mothers have taken care of Eidolon just fine without my help. They don’t need me this time either.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t know how to handle Roänach anyway. We’ve already established that my darkness would be useless against him, and even if I was standing right in front of him with a wooden stake in my hand, I’m not sure I could bring myself to kill him.”
“Then help them protect innocent people! Just something, anything other than nothing. Please!”
To my dismay, he shook his head again. “I’m sorry, Athaeÿn, I can’t leave you defenseless. I just can’t. Not after what Xythe did.” There was a long pause. “Besides, I don’t even know Eidolon.” When he turned back to me, his eyes were glistening with fear. “I know you.”
All I could do was stare at him.
But…
His voice crumbled. “Please don’t make me choose.”
The heartbreak in his tone shattered my aggravation like glass. The frustration lingered, but I could no longer find it in myself to argue.
What am I going to do?
I hung my head and ran my fingers through my hair.
If not for the stupid runes—
My eyes widened.
Wait, that’s it!
I looked up at him again. “I need you to get Vernyth.”
His gaze turned wary. “For the runes?”
I nodded. “He’s the only other living Arch-Vampire I know of,” my throat tightened with uncertainty, “and the only one we can trust.”
Shade's entire face contorted with unease.
You and I both.
“Listen, I know how this sounds coming from me of all people, but if Callyn trusts him, that’s good enough for me.” I glanced at the rocks that relentlessly oozed containment magic. “I just need him to deactivate the runes. Nothing more.”
Shade remained silent.
I turned back to him and put my hand on his arm. “It’s not like I can be turned into a Vampire a second time.”
He looked down and used his free hand to press mine against his warm skin. A full minute later, he found my gaze again. “Alright.”
Finally…
“Thank you, Shade. Believe me, I’m not thrilled either, but this is the only solution I can think of to the problem you handed me,” I chided, poking his chest.
Can’t say I blame you, though.
A guilty smile tugged his lips. “Sorry…”
I sighed and shook my head. “Sometimes, I think you care about me too much.”
“I can’t help it.”
“Don’t worry,” I grinned up at him, “it wasn’t a real complaint.”
He pulled me into a hug. “So, where do I find Vernyth?”
Chapter 28 ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 26
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Athaeÿn
None of us went back to sleep after Shade’s nightmare.
By now, I was sitting on just one of his thighs with my back against his chest. We hadn’t separated once since waking. I had his right hand cradled in my lap and his left in my hair, which did feel nice, but the intent was to keep him relaxed.
Seems to be working so far.
Unfortunately, it was at this moment he stopped playing with my hair to glower at his hand instead. “I don’t like my magic…”
Sathira looked at him sadly. “You just don’t understand it yet, sweetheart.”
His misery turned into a scowl. “I understand that it can knock people unconscious if I’m upset.” He suddenly looked at her with wide-eyed terror. “Wait, that massive darkness you could see from Eidolon… could I have killed everyone inside it?”
“Maybe, but I doubt under those circumstances.”
“What do you mean?”
“Arbiters are meant to be guardians, benevolent protectors who wield compassion and powerful magic for the people of Terraen. Violence is supposed to be a last resort. Sadly, there are exceptions…” She sighed and shook her head. “Our magic is deeply emotional in nature, but the deciding factor is intent.”
“So, no one died because I didn’t want to hurt anyone?”
She nodded. “I’m sure you were angry, but, above all, you were devastated, especially over Athaeÿn’s death. We could feel it.” She put her hand over her heart. “Unchecked rage may have led to a different outcome, but there’s no guarantee. Not all anger is destructive.”
He just stared at his hand again.
Sathira said nothing for a moment. “You know, I’m not actually sure if your magic has a harmful side. The Demons were knocked out, yes, but not injured, the raw emotion we felt was dreadful but otherwise benign, and the darkness is just, well, darkness. At least from what we’ve observed.” She tilted her head a little. “If there is capacity for harm, how it would manifest is unclear.”
Shade was unmoved. “Well, either way, I’ve seen nothing positive or worth exploring…”
A few minutes of gloomy silence passed.
Eventually, Sathira spoke again. “Would you like to see how our magic can help people?”
There was a delayed, halfhearted nod.
“Hold out your arm.” With one flowing gesture, she summoned snowy fog at her fingertips and wove it around Shade’s outstretched wrist, where it solidified into a thick cast of crystal-clear ice. She smiled when he gawked at it. “How does it feel?”
He turned his hand over a few times. “It’s not even cold.”
She chuckled lightly. “Securing a broken limb would be pointless if it died from frostbite.”
As Shade tried and failed to bend his wrist, Elvylli summoned a gentle flame and used it to slowly melt the ice. “Admittedly, our ice and fire are often helpful in a state that could harm people if we’re not careful, but if we want it to be harmless,” with the ice gone, she collected her flame over his upturned palm and lowered it onto his skin, “intent goes a long way.”
He flinched at first but smiled after a moment. “It’s not burning me.”
“I enjoy teaching kids not to play with fire,” she chuckled as well, “but sometimes they touch before they think.”
Shade’s weak smile died out with the fire. “It’s comforting to know I could have that much control someday, but at least fire and ice have real uses, good and bad. What use is disappearing into shadows and generating darkness? Who does that help?” He shook his head glumly. “If the only real use could be something harmful, I don’t want to wield it. I don’t want it to come out ever again.”
The queens’ brief joy faded with the sad glance they shared.
We’re just going in circles.
After another minute of uncomfortable silence, I squeezed his hand and glanced up at him. “I agree with your mothers about exploring your magic.”
He narrowed his eyes at me. “Why?”
“You need to know the full extent of its capability. Let them help you.”
“But I don’t want to use it.”
“And you can make that choice after you know what you’re dealing with. At the very least, you should know how to control it. Wouldn’t it be nice to not have more incidents like tonight?”
He averted his gaze without saying anything, but his hand fidgeting in my lap betrayed how conflicted he was.
Sathira spoke when he wouldn't. “Athaeÿn’s right, sweetheart.” She waited until he looked at her. “We would never force you to use your magic, especially not to hurt anyone, but fundamental knowledge and unwavering command of your abilities are absolutely crucial. In everyday life, interpreting our emotions helps us avoid lashing out at others. The same applies to your magic.”
Shade pressed me to his chest as he listened, but I wasn’t sure he even noticed. Regardless, I hugged his arm supportively.
“We can’t always choose our emotions, but we can decide what to do with them. Simply put, you’re in charge of your actions.” She offered a patient smile. “If your magic is capable of harm, you must be able to recognize the feeling that comes with it.”
I felt him swallow hard as he stared at her.
Come on, Shade.
When he looked at his hand again, his glance was accompanied by a shaky sigh and reluctant nod. “Okay.”
Phew…
I lightly jostled his other hand and smiled up at him. “For what it’s worth, I think your ability to disappear into shadows is really cool.”
As his gaze drifted to mine, the corners of his mouth turned up ever so slightly. “It was useful to defend myself against Xythe.”
“I’m sure it was. As for your darkness, I promise there’ll be a perfect time and place for it without hurting anyone. You just have to find it.”
“You really think so?”
“I know so.”
He smiled and nuzzled my forehead. “Thanks, Athaeÿn.”
“Any time, Shade.”
After hugging me tightly, he returned his attention to his mothers. “Can we fly a few miles away first? I don’t want to endanger anyone here.”
Sathira smiled. “I was going to suggest the same thing.”
I looked at them as well. “I doubt Daryn and I would have much to worry about, but we’ll hang back in case the sun finally burns through the clouds.” I thought for a moment and glanced up at Shade again. “Hey, maybe that could be a use for your darkness.”
He looked a bit skeptical. “Shielding you from the sun?”
“From what I’ve seen and heard, it absorbs all light. I don’t see why it wouldn’t work.”
“I… guess that makes sense.”
“Don’t worry,” I paused to kiss his cheek, “we wouldn’t try until you were confident.”
He smiled bashfully and held the spot I kissed. “You make me feel like I can do anything.”
“Because you can,” I kissed his lips this time, “so hold on to that feeling and run with it. Or fly, your choice.”
He crushed me against his chest in another tight hug. “I will.”
I was glad to feel his heart pounding with excitement. Hopefully, his enthusiasm would make things easier for him.
You got this, Shade.
Once he had gotten his fill of squishing me, he set me down and beamed at his mothers. “Can we leave now?”
Sathira smiled proudly. “Of course.”
…
The three Arbiters didn’t stop by the castle once all day, not even for lunch or an afternoon snack. I started to worry when evening arrived without them, so I tried to convince myself they had just lost track of time. Exploring Shade’s magic was probably an intensive task.
I’m sure they’re fine.
Daryn and I were still in the large entry hall after spending most of the day there, but one of us had been far busier than the other. He was sitting on a stack of pillows in front of a huge gathering of what had to be every youngling in the castle, all of whom were enraptured by his stories.
Meanwhile, I was lounging against the wall nearby with a grin on my face. Apparently, he was happy to put aside his dislike of crowds if it meant showing off his extensive knowledge. To be fair, it was impressive.
I might be as amazed as the kids.
Currently, the little ones were awestruck by tales of his homeland, the sprawling and revered forest known as Fae’s Embrace.
One of the more inquisitive Solar Demon kids spoke up. “Are the trees there really alive?”
Daryn held up a finger. “All flora are living things, Xian, but yes, the Soulwoods have a bit more life to them than the average tree, which is why we live among them so effortlessly. Not only are they the largest trees in the world, but their thick branches form natural bridges and open areas to walk. They even weave houses for us in the canopy,” he made a big, enthusiastic gesture with both hands, “but we also live inside the trunks, which open and close all on their own.
“It’s believed they contain the souls of departed Wood Elves, hence their name, and that even the oldest are still held deep within their roots. Normally, the Soulwoods only respond to our kind, but they have been known to open for outsiders in immediate danger. Their protection rivals the walls of any castle, as their bark can harden like steel and is completely fireproof. Even their leaves can shrug off stray embers in the wind.”
Xian was beaming. “So, I wouldn’t have to worry about my magic burning the trees?”
“That’s right. In fact, trees love sunlight. I bet the Soulwoods would welcome you and your solar magic with open branches.”
“I wanna go!”
“You’ll get the chance someday. I’ll be sure to put in a good word for you.”
As the kids broke out in excited conversations, my thoughts drifted to my own homeland. Specifically, the endless glowing crystals lining the tunnels. I had no memories of discourse regarding souls of departed Dark Elves or the crystals’ possible involvement, but I found it hard to believe the concept had never crossed anyone’s mind.
Maybe the notion came and went long before my time.
If it had, it was probably shrugged off as wishful thinking.
A nice idea, though.
I ruminated for a few more seconds before glancing at the back of Daryn’s head. “Do you believe the Soulwood theory?”
He turned a bit to see me better. “There’s no definitive proof, but it seems like a reasonable explanation for their lifelike behavior, at least in my eyes. There’s still much about souls we don’t know or understand, so who’s to say the Soulwood phenomenon isn’t possible?”
“Do you think your soul found its way there? Or did Rialla use it to summon a Demon? That’s what Roänach did with mine.”
“She did, so I’ve always assumed it’s gone forever.” His brows furrowed heavily. “If true, the Soulwoods will never know I existed…”
The forlorn haze dulling his eyes had my chest tight with regret. “Well, like you said, we don’t know everything about souls. Maybe they’re not actually lost when used to summon Demons. Maybe they’re more of a catalyst and are free to go once they’ve set things in motion.”
He sighed and shook his head. “From what I understand, and to put it rather crudely, souls are essentially used as currency to purchase Demons from Dominion. I don’t see how they could survive such a violent transaction.”
“I think Raethe is more interested in the before and after. He finds cruelty entertaining, right? Our murders and summoned Demons’ misery are what he’s interested in. Souls are just a means to an end.”
There was no response.
I tilted my head a little when his gaze fell. “You know, Xythe used Shade’s soul to fuel the solar shield for a thousand years. We may not have had powerful Arbiter souls, but if his could survive an ordeal like that, I don’t see why ours couldn’t handle a few simple summonings.”
His head lifted ever so slightly.
“Even without proof, the Soulwood theory seems believable to me. I see no reason why my theory has to be any different.” His eyes were still downcast, but I offered a reassuring smile anyway. “I bet once Rialla borrowed your soul, it was free to go home.”
He finally looked at me again. “You really think so?”
“I do.”
His gaze fell once more but, this time, was accompanied by a small smile.
It was clear this had bothered him for a long time, so I was relieved to see his tension ease.
I hope my theories are right.
He looked at me a few minutes later. “What about your soul?”
“There’s no consensus among Dark Elves, but I like the concept of the Soulwoods. It got me thinking about the crystals in the Obsidian Spine. Maybe their light is actually from departed souls of my people.”
“Sounds plausible to me.”
Another smile tugged my lips as I fiddled with my hands in my lap, but it faded when thoughts of my people led to memories of my parents. Ten years without contact was bad enough. Now that three hundred years had passed, it was difficult not to drown in guilt, regardless of who was at fault.
Maybe my soul went home and has been watching over them.
My throat tightened.
Please don’t let them hate me…
I was dragged out of my thoughts by the sound of approaching wingbeats, and it wasn’t long before the three Arbiters landed and came inside.
Daryn looked over and made a sweeping hand gesture. “Ah, the dragons return.”
“Athaeÿn!”
Shade’s cheerful voice brought a smile back to my face. “How’d it go?”
“It went great! Want to see what I’ve been practicing?”
“Of course.”
He could barely contain himself as he sat in front of me and put his hand between us. A moment later, a black dot appeared on his palm and slowly expanded into a sphere about a foot in diameter, making it look like he was holding a ball of darkness.
I waved my hand through it and smiled when nothing happened. “I’m really proud of you.”
A slight blush darkened his face as he dispelled the sphere. “Thank you. I’m still not sure how to help anyone with this, but at least I can control it a bit better.”
“Like I said, you’ll think of something.” With the sphere gone, I took gentle hold of his hand. “Did you get a chance to push into harmful territory? If your magic even has it, that is.”
He nodded. “It was a lot harder than I thought it would be.”
“I imagine you were afraid to hurt your mothers.”
“Probably, but I’m not upset about it.” His gaze fell to his massive claws. “I don’t want harm to come easily.”
I watched his eyes for a moment. “You still feel bad about hurting Xythe, don’t you?”
His nod was sullen this time.
“In your defense, he didn’t give you much of a choice.”
“It became a choice toward the end.”
“But you didn’t kill him.”
He said nothing for a few moments. “I just wanted everything to stop…”
I shifted onto his lap and hugged him tightly. “At least he can never hurt anyone again.”
There was a shaky exhale as he returned the embrace and leaned his head on mine. “He had a thousand years to let go of his grudge. All that effort he put into lying to me, why couldn’t he have used it to become a better person instead?”
“Unfortunately, people like Xythe justify every action they take, regardless of circumstances. He was never going to fix what he considered unbroken.”
Shade nodded reluctantly and buried his face in my hair. “I’m so tired.”
I know…
“Well, it is bedtime. You must be exhausted after working on your magic all day.” I heard a faint exhale of amusement, but Shade didn’t get the chance to reply.
“I’ll tell you who’s tired,” Daryn butted in loudly. “Me.”
Elvylli snorted a laugh. “Looks like you’ve been sitting on your ass all day.”
“Excuse me, I’ve been running Daryn’s Demon Daycare all day, thank you very much,” he snapped, gesturing wildly to the giggling kids in front of him.
I spun around on Shade’s lap so Daryn could see my smirk. “The only thing that’s been running is your mouth.”
“Which was exhausting.”
“I didn’t hear any complaining.”
“I’m not one to disappoint my fan club.” He gestured to the large gathering again. “Right kids?”
“Right, Uncle Daryn,” they replied in unison.
He clutched his chest and choked out a melodramatic sob. “I’m legendary.”
Elvylli pursed her lips. “Your ego certainly is.”
Sathira put her hands on her hips. “How are you so antisocial yet so desperate for attention?”
He splayed his fingers across his chest. “I’m a man of many talents.” There was still a grin on his face when he turned back to the kids. “Alright, you ready? Three, two, one,” he threw his arms forward, “disperse!”
The crowd of children laughed and squealed as they scrambled to their feet and scattered in both directions down the hall, tripping over themselves and each other as they went.
Elvylli raised a brow. “I didn’t peg you as someone who would be good with children.”
“You have never pegged me in any way, shape, or form, and I would respectfully ask you keep it that way.”
“Ew, Daryn—”
“No, ew would have applied if I requested the opposite. Nothing personal, of course.”
“Too late, I’m already insulted.”
“Lies. If you were actually insulted, you would have—” his mouth was still open when he glanced at Shade. After a brief pause, he shook his head and cleared his throat. “Never mind. Anyway, I agree about bedtime. Farewell, friends,” he added as he got up and wandered off, stretching his arms above his head as he went.
I was glad Daryn hadn’t finished his immolation joke.
Hopefully, Shade is oblivious.
When I glanced up at him, he was just blinking in confusion as Daryn walked away.
Good…
He looked down at me once Daryn was out of earshot. “What was he going to say?”
“Something else gross about pegging, I’m sure.”
“What’s pegging?”
“I’ll tell you when you’re older.”
“But I’m—”
I grinned and pressed a finger to his lips. “Shush.”
He pulled my hand down. “Is it—”
“Still bedtime? Yes.”
The giant frown on Shade’s face was highly amusing. “Fiiiiine…”
Once everyone settled down to sleep, I smirked up at him from where I lay against his chest. “Try not to have another nightmare,” I teased, keeping my tone light and playful.
He chuckled and squeezed me in his arms. “You’re one to talk.”
“Ouch.”
“Arms or words?”
“Yes.”
We had a tiny giggling fit before finally going quiet, but there was still a smile on my face when I hugged his arm a few minutes later. The soothing rhythm of his heartbeat was already lulling me to sleep.
I can’t wait until I’m free to be with him forever.
Chapter 27 ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 25
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Athaeÿn
As soon as Shade let go of his mothers, he rushed over and snatched me up into a crushing hug. With my arms pinned to my sides and my feet dangling helplessly, the embrace was rather one-sided. It was a good thing I didn’t need to breathe.
There was, however, just enough air already in my lungs to wheeze into his chest. “Y-You’re going to snap me in half—”
“Oops, sorry.” His smile tinged with guilt as he set me down and smoothed out my clothing. “So, what happens now?”
Sathira answered as she and Elvylli came over. “We’re going to teach you how to fly and control your magic before we confront Roänach.”
Shade’s smile faded. “Will that be difficult? I don’t want to slow everyone down.”
“Flying cuts week-long trips down to hours, and knowing how to wield your magic properly is crucial for everyone’s safety, including your own.”
He nodded hesitantly. “Okay. What are we starting with?”
She looked to the side and hummed in thought for a moment. “Flying is vital for taking swift action, especially if plans change. Learning about your magic is still important, but it can wait if necessary.” Her gaze drifted back to him. “In the event of a delay, we would ask you not to use it until we can resume study and confirm your understanding and control.”
He nodded again but now looked a bit confused. “But, wouldn’t my darkness be useful to blind Roänach?”
I shook my head. “It would be, if he was literally anything other than a Vampire.”
“What do you mean?”
“Remember when Elvylli mentioned Daryn acting as their eyes?”
“Oh, yeah. I meant to ask about that.”
“She implied he was using his thermal vision, something all Vampires have that allows us to see heat instead of light. I was using mine when we first crossed paths in that pitch-black tunnel. It’s the only reason I could see you.”
He frowned at his hand. “Figures. I finally have all my magic but can’t even use it…”
“We haven’t explored it yet, sweetheart,” Sathira chimed back in. “Arbiter magic works on a spectrum, and we only know one small piece of yours. I’m sure we’ll find something for these circumstances.” She offered a reassuring smile. “We just have to look.”
Shade beamed with renewed confidence. “When do we start flying lessons?”
“Tomorrow. I think it’s safe to assume everyone needs some good, restful sleep.”
He nodded and yawned widely. “Fine with meeee…” Without warning, he once again hugged me to his chest so my feet couldn’t touch the ground, and there I remained as he turned and headed for the castle.
“Excuse me, I have two functioning legs.”
“Sorry,” he gave me a light squeeze, “I’m just really happy.”
All I could do was grin to myself.
This is what I get for admitting I enjoy being carried.
…
Surprising no one, Daryn made a fuss about sleeping on the floor. Luckily for him, two Demons offered to share one of their beds so he could have the other, and he accepted without hesitation. The Arbiters and I didn’t mind sleeping on the floor in the main hall, but we did accept offerings of spare pillows and blankets. The three of them were too big for normal beds anyway.
Shade tried to convince me to borrow a bed as well, but I was happy to sleep next to him the same way as in the spirit den. Sleeping against his chest was better than any bed. I hardly even noticed the lack of soft cloud moss.
The Solar Demons had extinguished the orbs lining the hall so we could sleep better, but they didn’t bother making new ones when morning arrived. Even with full cloud cover, there was ample daylight to see clearly, especially with the towering entry doors standing wide open for fresh air. Daryn and I certainly didn’t mind the lack of miniature indoor suns.
Meanwhile, mothers and son were outside discussing various wing mechanics. Thanks to the clouds, I was able to sit and watch in relative safety, though I remained just inside the doorway to be sure.
My breath caught when Shade spread his wings for the first time. His full span had to be at least thirty feet. Arbiters were known for their dragon inspiration, but he truly had the presence of one. It was difficult not to stare at him. Embarrassingly so.
Wow, he really is—
“Should I give you some privacy?”
Daryn’s voice startled me so bad I gasped and clutched my chest.
For fuck’s sake—
Once I collected myself, I glared at him over my shoulder. “Shut up.”
He snorted a laugh from where he sat leaning on the wall nearby. “Relax. I won’t tell him you were ogling.”
“I wasn’t og—”
“Oh yes you were,” he tilted his head smugly, “but don’t worry, I’m not judging.”
I frowned at him. “Ogling sounds crass.”
“Forgive my word choice. Would you prefer admiring?”
“Yes, but now I feel weird about it either way.”
“Indeed, so imagine my rapture having to witness your repressed titillation.”
“You know,” I spun around to face him better, “this castle is rather large.”
“I would prefer to keep you in my line of sight.”
“Seems a bit contradictory.”
“Big Red is busy,” he gestured outside, “so I’m keeping an eye on you.”
My brows furrowed a little. “Did he ask you to?”
“No. Watching over other Vampires is quite literally my job.” He started casually inspecting his fingernails. “Besides, there’s nothing better to do.”
A grin crossed my face. “You just want to show me off to Callyn.”
“Lies and slander.”
I laughed through my nose. “Have they really looked for me all this time?”
“They have.”
“And repeatedly pestered you about it?”
“Much to my annoyance.”
“That definitely sounds like Callyn.”
“Unfortunately for me.” He shook his head. “Their determination was admirable, but I was displeased when they reached out to Vernyth for assistance.” His gaze drifted to me. “I assume you know who that is.”
“I do.”
He nodded and resumed scrutinizing his nails. “I look forward to shoving you in Callyn’s face with no Vernyth in sight.”
“So, you do just want to show me off.”
“Nonsense. I’m genuinely chuffed to see you in one piece, Callyn or no Callyn.” He said nothing for a moment. “But my concern for your well-being goes beyond that, and I’m not happy about it.”
My smile faded, but I could tell he had more to say, so I waited for him to continue.
He finally did a minute later. “I may be a respected government official, but I’m far from a paragon. My shame is that, at least in general, I care only for fellow Undead despite valid plights of the living. The fact I’m a Vampire Representative is no excuse.” He shook his head and glanced at me again. “You were supposed to be someone I could overlook.”
Ah, I see…
I offered a bittersweet smile. “I wish I was still alive too.”
We both averted our gazes and fiddled with our hands for a while.
Eventually, I looked at him again. “Down in the cave, when I was talking about Roänach, you brought up someone named Rialla. Was that your master?”
He nodded, still focused on his hands. “The first and only Arch-Vampire I’ve ever been cursed to know. Personally, at least.”
“Same with Roänach in my case. How long have you been free?”
“Longer than you’ve been Undead. To be exact, four hundred fifty-seven years.”
“What happened to Rialla?”
“Got herself killed twice. She had a Sacrifice Spirit as well, which is why I knew what Lune was the moment I saw it,” he glanced at me, “and why I was pretty sure it could bring you back.”
“Just pretty sure?”
“Rialla wasn’t cremated like you. Her throat was a bit torn open, and by a bit I mean her head was nearly taken off.”
“A near-severed head does sound easier to fix than a pile of bones.”
He nodded and glanced down the hall at a small group of Lunar Demons. “The result of a summoning gone wrong. Well, the summoning itself went smoothly, just not the aftermath, and I’m proud to say I had a hand in that. The Fauna Demon she had summoned was freaking out more than most, which I heard and came running to investigate.
“Fortunately, by the time I showed up, he had managed to avoid her touch. I distracted Rialla with a shout, which gave him an opening to claw her neck. While she was incapacitated, I told him to impale her heart with one of her own stakes,” he relayed proudly.
I was enraptured by his story. Maybe even a little envious. “That’s amazing.”
A heavy frown replaced his smile. “It was amazing… for a whole minute. I felt our connection sever, so I knew for certain she was dead. I finally tasted freedom.” He huffed and shook his head. “But then her stupid Sacrifice Spirit ruined everything.”
“I’m surprised one would bond with an Arch-Vampire.”
“Normally, I’d agree, but I don’t think spirits care about morality. Either way, Rialla was back on her feet with fully restored control in no time at all.” He sighed heavily. “At least the Demon was able to escape…”
“Did you get the chance to thank him?”
“I did.”
“And were you able to get his name?”
He nodded. “Xiir. Couldn’t forget if I tried.”
Hmm, doesn’t ring a bell.
“Do you know what happened to him afterward?”
Daryn flashed a cheeky grin. “Only one incident. Before he fled, I gave him a quick rundown of how to kill Vampires in case he ever needed to defend himself.”
I think I know where this is going.
“A year later, Rialla went out to find another blood captive. Guess who she ran into.”
I smiled back. “A certain Fauna Demon she failed to enthrall?”
“Yes!” He clapped his hands so loudly it sent a thunderous echo down the vaulted hallway. “Of all the villages she could have targeted, she just happened to pick the one Xiir had ended up in.”
“And he had a bone to pick.”
“More like a whole skeleton. He recognized her immediately and attacked on sight.”
“Did he keep stakes on him?”
“No idea. All I know is he knocked her unconscious and threw her in the local river.” He barked a laugh that echoed like his clap. “She would have disintegrated in seconds,” his smile suddenly vanished, “meaning no one got the chance to pull the shit Vernyth did.”
Whoa—
I smiled to try and lighten the mood. “So, Xiir saved you twice.”
“All of us.” He sighed and shook his head. “Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to thank him a second time. He left that village long before we found out what happened, so I haven’t seen him since he was first summoned.” His gaze fell. “Wherever he is, I hope he’s alive and well.”
“It sounds like he can take care of himself. I’m sure he’s fine.”
He nodded faintly. “You’re probably right. I just wish I knew either way…”
There was a moment of silence.
I offered another smile. “Well, it’s nice to hear you’ve been free for so long. I look forward to being free again as well.”
He slowly looked at me. “It’s about time another Arch-Vampire dies.”
My smile faded as quickly as it had surfaced.
He’s right. What’s your problem?
I knew Roänach needed to die, but there was a dread in my heart I couldn’t shake. It was infuriating. I hated feeling so conflicted even after he threw me away. After everything he had done.
At least I’ll never have to worry about killing him myself…
Before I could withdraw into familiar misery, I was startled by a tremendous thud outside that shook the ground beneath me.
Daryn glanced at the open doors. “I believe the actual flying lessons have begun.”
The three Arbiters strolled inside a few moments later.
“Lunch time!” Shade announced cheerfully.
I stood up to ask something I already knew the answer to. “What was that noise?”
“Oh, that was me. I fell.”
“Are you alright? It felt like an earthquake.”
“Don’t worry, I’m just really heavy.”
I nodded reluctantly. “Fair enough. Were you jumping out of trees or something?”
“Off the castle.”
“What?!”
His smile never wavered. “It wasn’t the top or anything.”
“Shade—”
“It was fun!”
I nearly sputtered with disbelief and looked to his mothers for an explanation.
“We were right there,” Elvylli reassured with a grin. “Besides, he practically begged us. How could we say no?”
Shade chimed back in. “No actual flying yet, just catching air and landing safely.” He scratched his cheek a bit. “In my defense, I was actually doing pretty well. I just messed up the last jump…”
I sighed and put my hands on my hips. “Well, practice makes perfect, I suppose.”
“That’s what my mothers said!” He was practically vibrating with excitement. “Do you want to see my progress later?”
The enthusiastic grin on his face was contagious. “Of course.”
“Yes!”
As a beaming Shade ran off, Daryn waved his hand from where he remained seated against the wall. “Sathira, my selfless and succulent savior, Dehydrated Daryn needs a drink.” He batted his eyelashes. “Mind if I get a suck?”
She sighed heavily but went over to him without protest. “Must you phrase it in such a vulgar manner?”
He just snickered and sank his fangs into her thigh.
“I’m far too tolerant of your nonsense.” She glanced at Elvylli. “We both are.”
There was a hummed laugh as he pulled back and wiped his mouth. “Divine as always.”
“Your charm is your saving grace.”
He put his hand on his chest. “And your flattery makes my heart flutter.”
I couldn’t help but grin at their exchange.
Maybe I’ll ask Shade for a bite when he gets back. Politely.
…
Shade made substantial progress with his flying over the next few days, becoming more and more like a majestic dragon with every wingbeat.
It took quite a bit of convincing on his end, but I was eventually persuaded to let him make the ultimate leap of faith from the top of the castle. I made sure to fast beforehand so I wouldn’t have a heart attack. Despite his mothers being right there to help if needed, I was drowning in anxiety as I watched him climb the castle until he was nothing more than a tiny dot on the tip of the tallest spire.
Please be careful.
I held myself and took a deep breath.
He can do it.
And yet, paralyzing terror gripped my chest when he leapt off.
Please—
My fears were swiftly abated when he spread his wings and curved upward in a giant arc as though commanding the wind itself to obey. It didn’t look like he had struggled at all.
Wow—
Even with the deafening cheers of the Demons around us, I could hear Shade’s howls of triumph as he soared confident and free. His mothers only watched for about a minute before joining him high overhead, where the three of them effortlessly whirled around each other as if they had been born among the clouds. Shade was nothing less than a natural.
Meanwhile, my cheeks hurt from how hard I was smiling.
What an incredible family.
In that moment, I was more determined than ever to find my own.
And thanks to this one, I’ll finally have that chance.
…
I had thought for certain Shade would sleep soundly after such a momentous occasion.
I was wrong.
That same night, I woke from a dead sleep to find myself being slowly crushed. Normally, I loved being held tightly against his chest, but this embrace was abnormally strong.
And painful—
It wasn’t long before he started shaking and whimpering, but right as I was about to try and wake him, the most intense darkness I had ever seen spilled from his body and swallowed up everything around us.
This is what they could see from Eidolon?
Ignoring how terrifying that sounded, I switched to my thermal vision and cranked my head around to see his face. Not only was his visage somehow even brighter than usual, but his grimace was also clearly visible despite the limited detail I had to work with.
All of a sudden, Elvylli’s startled voice pierced the darkness. “What the—”
I glanced over to see both queens now wide awake and looking around blindly.
“Not again— Tyrran!”
“Don’t worry, I’ll wake him up,” I reassured, turning my head back around. “Shade!”
The only response I got was hyperventilating and even more violent shaking.
“Shade!”
This time, his eyes snapped wide open and began darting around frantically. “Athaeÿn?!” He sat bolt upright but looked over my head as if I wasn’t even there. “A-Athaeÿn, please—”
“Shade, I’m right here.”
“H-Huh?” When he looked down, he appeared genuinely shocked to find me in his arms.
“Your darkness is spreading.”
He blinked at me a few times before looking around again. “Oh no— Wait, how do I—” He shook his head with increasing panic. “I don’t know how I stopped it last time—”
“Sweetheart,” Sathira interrupted gently, “the more you panic, the less control you have. Calm your mind, and your magic will follow.”
Even though he closed his eyes to try, I could tell he still struggled to breathe.
It was only a matter of time before he had a nightmare about that…
I shook my head a little and held his face with both hands. “Shade, look at me.” When he reopened his eyes, I had a smile waiting for him. “I’m safe.”
He just stared at me with wide-eyed horror.
As much as I wanted to watch him, I switched back to my normal vision so I could tell when and if his darkness retracted, making sure to keep my face toward his as I waited in the strange void. The world around me didn’t reappear until a few minutes later, but the tears streaming down his face were all I could see.
Oh no…
His eyes were now almost squinted shut. “I’m so sorry.”
I could barely hear his feeble whisper. “It’s alright—”
“No, it’s not alright.” He pulled my hands off his face and averted his gaze. “I’m completely useless,” he added, his voice steadily rising.
“Shade—”
“I can’t control my magic. I can’t contain my emotions. I can’t protect the people I care about. I can’t even help strangers.” He shook his head. “I can’t do anything.”
“Shade, listen—”
His shoulders started to heave. “It’s all my fault. I let Xythe take everything. My soul, my wings, my freedom… my entire life…” He looked devastated when he turned back to me. “Even you.”
I tried to hold his hand. “That’s not what hap—"
“It doesn’t matter. I was right there and couldn’t protect you. My incompetence got you killed.” He repeatedly jabbed himself in the chest. “If I had just stood up for myself, for you, none of this would’ve happened. If I had just kept you safe, you wouldn’t have had to sacrifice yourself, and if you hadn’t died, Lune would still be here.”
There was a sudden, heartbroken quiver in Lune’s warmth, and I knew Shade felt it too when he froze and clutched his chest. I forced myself to stay quiet this time.
When he snapped out of his shock, he grimaced and hung his head miserably. “I lost two friends but only got one of them back.” His voice had crumbled again. “All I had to do was hold on. If I hadn’t dropped you when he ordered me to… If-If I hadn’t…” His hand was trembling on his chest when he lifted his head and looked at me again. “Please forgive me.”
The despair in his eyes was unbearable, but Lune’s sorrow over him blaming himself was even worse. My chest hurt from every angle.
Don’t worry, Lune. I’ll speak for both of us.
I took hold of Shade’s face again. “Apparently, my previous words didn’t sink in, so listen carefully.” My stern tone mirrored my firm grip and intent eye contact. “The only one to blame for what happened is Xythe. End of story. Period. You didn’t let him do anything. That’s now how this works.”
Please listen.
I pulled his face closer and softened my tone. “This is not your fault. Xythe is the one who put us in that situation, not you. He may have taken advantage of your fear, but, in doing so, he also handed me an opportunity to save you. I took that chance, and Lune did the same for me. We chose to give our lives and would do it again in a heartbeat.” My vision blurred as I pulled him even closer. “You were worth everything.”
Time froze as we stared into each other’s eyes.
Without warning, Shade broke down sobbing and pulled me into a trembling hug. The familiar, desperate clinging broke my heart. I wasn’t sure if my sentiment had finally sunk in, but I didn’t care at the moment. I just wanted to comfort him.
He could use your warmth, Lune.
I shifted in his embrace until I was kneeling on his thighs with his head cradled against the base of my neck. As I hoped, his shaking began to ease the moment my fingers laced into his hair.
You’re alright…
Even after he calmed down, he kept his face buried in my chest and his arms locked around me, refusing to let go. I could hardly blame him.
He did lose me once, after all.
Still combing my fingers through his hair, I glanced over my shoulder to find his mothers smiling, sadly, but with genuine relief. My gaze drifted between them before landing on Sathira, who put her hand on her chest and silently mouthed Thank you. I just smiled back.
You’re welcome.
Lune’s warmth was at peace once again.
Chapter 26 ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 24
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Athaeÿn
The castle stairwell almost felt ominous as we stood in front of the bottom step, staring up the daunting yet beckoning passage. We had been standing there for at least five minutes.
My gaze drifted to Shade. “Has it really been a year since you were last up there?”
He nodded and glanced back at the tunnel. “Is it weird that I might actually miss this place?”
“I don’t think so. It may have been your prison, but it was also your home.”
He nodded again and smiled wistfully at the towering wall we had scaled. “I will miss the rock climbing.”
I smiled with him. “I think you’ll like mountains.”
“Climb up, fly down,” he mused before turning back to the stairs. “Speaking of flying, I don’t know how yet, so I guess we’re doing this the hard way.”
“And if my legs get tired, you can carry me.”
“Okay, Daryn.”
Now eager to get out of the cave, I started up the stairs but paused after just five when I noticed Shade wasn’t following. I glanced back just in time to see him turn and look off to the side, but before I could ask what was wrong, he went over to where his thousand years of imprisonment were etched into the wall and just stood there staring at them. A full minute later, he smiled and clawed something new underneath. I couldn’t see it from my angle.
“What did you write?” I asked when he came back over.
His grin never wavered as he passed me on the stairs without looking back. “Nothing you don’t already know.”
I was overcome with curiosity but decided against looking and followed him instead.
A scribble for closure, maybe.
We climbed the stairs for a few minutes. It had stopped being fun after the first.
I broke the silence with a huff. “As painful as it was to be literally dragged down the stairs by Xythe, at least I didn’t have to do any work.”
Without hesitation, Shade scooped me up against his chest the same way as our first time crossing the river. “Allow me to do the opposite.”
I grinned to myself. “If you insist.”
The ascent went much faster with him carrying me.
“Speaking of Xythe, I’ll be fucking pissed if he ditched my trunk.”
Shade chuckled. “Change your mind about the curtains?”
“Wearing curtains would be a pain, but no. There’s something irreplaceable in it.”
“Oh. Well, if it makes you feel any better, I doubt he got rid of it.”
“What makes you say that?”
“He valued efficiency, so, if anything, he probably just made use of it somehow.”
By emptying it first.
A pit formed in my stomach.
Or maybe he didn’t bother and just set more trophies on it like a table.
My shoulders relaxed a little but remained somewhat tense.
Shade seemed to notice and smiled down at me. “But if it’s not in his room, we’ll search the castle until we find it, okay?”
Despite lingering uncertainty, I smiled back and rested my head on his chest. “Thank you.”
When we finally made it to the top of the stairs, he set me down and started brushing himself off, muttering a tiny ew under his breath as he did so.
“Oh, I’m sorry, did my loincloth shed on you?” I teased, making sure the item in question was still securely tied around my waist.
“It is a little ashy.” His grin fractured after a moment. “Also, I just noticed how much dried blood is on my stomach,” he added, trying to rub some of it off without much success.
I hadn’t noticed until now either. It blended right in with his deep red skin. “Xythe injured you, didn’t he?”
“Just a little bit.”
I knew he was downplaying what happened. “Well, I’m glad you have that healing factor.”
“Me too…”
As we headed down the vaulted hallway, the unmistakable ruckus of a large crowd got louder and louder. Eventually, we stumbled upon a chaotic sea of activity, at the center of which stood Elvylli and Sathira. It looked like every Demon in the castle was packed into the hall.
A lone figure stood apart from the rest, which turned out to be Daryn leaning on the wall a good twenty feet from the edge of the crowd.
I grinned and went over to him. “Not feeling particularly social?”
“Huge crowds are the queens’ field of expertise, not mine,” he replied without looking at me. “Besides, keeping an eye on the situation from afar is a highly specialized task few are qualified to undertake. I just happen to be one of those select few.”
“Uh-huh.”
Meanwhile, the queens looked over and smiled when they saw Shade, prompting the crowd to look as well and swarm us. Daryn retreated before they could get close. The sheer number of voices all speaking at once was nearly incomprehensible, but I was able to discern some apologies and grateful exclamations. Luckily, they kept their hands to themselves despite the frenzy of excitement.
Shade recoiled from the sudden wave of attention but recovered just as quickly. After watching the commotion for a bit, he waved his hands until they quieted down. “H-Hi there. Um, I’m sorry for knocking you all unconscious. I didn’t mean to. Is everyone alright?”
They briefly confirmed and went quiet again.
A Starlight Demon in the front lifted her hand to speak. Her four celestial eyes showed peaceful nebulas but were wide with horror. “The queens told us everything. Is it all true?”
“It is.” He shook his head a bit. “Despite how things ended, Xythe was actually kind during my birthday months. Well, to me, at least. Please tell me that didn’t change when I wasn’t around.”
“Our enthrallment kept us obedient, meaning there was nothing for him to punish, and, fortunately, he wasn’t cruel for no reason.” Her voice saddened. “To us, at least.”
Shade sighed with relief. “Thank you, that makes me feel better.”
She stared at him for a few seconds before shaking her head. “I’m so sorry, Tyrran.” Tears welled in her starry eyes. “I wish we could have helped you.”
“There’s no need to apologize for what wasn’t your fault. As far as I’m concerned, we were all prisoners.” He smiled and offered his hand, which she took without breaking eye contact. “I’m just glad we’re free.”
A single tear came down her cheek as she smiled back.
After gently pulling his hand free, he glanced down and spotted a much younger Starlight Demon standing in front of her legs.
The little one was gawking up at him with the biggest eyes of childlike wonder I had ever seen, and the fact they literally twinkled made it even better.
“Hey, look who it is!” Shade crouched down so he was closer to the youngling’s level. “I’ve seen you around the castle. You turned five this year, right?”
The little Starlight Demon shook his head. “Nope. Just four.”
“Four?! No, that can’t be right. You’re almost as big as me!”
There was a tiny giggle.
Shade smiled and gestured to the adult he had been talking to. “Is that your mother behind you?” When the youngling nodded, Shade sat him on his shoulder and stood all the way up. “Those are mine,” he added, pointing over the crowd at Elvylli and Sathira.
“You get to have two?!”
“I know, aren’t I lucky?”
The youngling beamed at everyone from his towering shoulder perch and started kicking the air when he glanced down and waved at his mother. “Momma, look how tall I am!”
She waved back. “I bet you could touch the clouds from up there.”
Shade chuckled when his chest got kicked as well in the little one’s excitement. “Alright, I have to take care of something with my friend Athaeÿn, but we’ll be back soon. Here, catch!” Instead of actually tossing the youngling, he handed him back to his mother but made a show of it to amuse them.
As the crowd refocused on the queens, Shade and I began making our way to the elevator shaft that led to Xythe’s room.
“That wasn’t as scary as I thought it would be,” he said once out of earshot.
I smirked up at him. “Multifaceted natural talent, it would seem.”
He averted his gaze but failed to hide a tiny grin.
“In all seriousness, this may be the first time you’ve interacted with them, but I’m sure their general familiarity soothed your nerves.”
His smile faded. “I wish I already knew them.” He shook his head a little. “I never understood why they always ignored me, but now that I know about enthrallment…”
I said nothing for a moment. “Xythe forced you to rely on him and him alone.”
By now, Shade looked miserable. “If his goal was to make the big reveal as painful as possible, he succeeded.”
Yeah, it couldn’t have been much worse.
The look on Shade’s face when Xythe showed his true colors would haunt me forever.
Better me than his mothers…
When we reached the elevator and stepped onto the gold platform, my stomach dropped when I spotted the lone control orb on the wall. I had completely forgotten this lift was unique.
Shit—
As I petulantly mimicked Xythe’s wrist-flicking gesture, Shade looked up the elevator shaft and sighed heavily. “Even if I knew how to fly, it’s too narrow in here,” he mumbled, turning and scratching the wall with his claw. “I can probably climb up…”
His dejected tone broke my heart. “Shade, we don’t have to—”
“Yes, we do. Your trunk with the irreplaceable thing in it could be up there, and you shouldn’t have to walk around in shredded rags.” He shook his head without looking at me. “Besides, climbing will take my mind off things…”
I stared at him for a few seconds. “Are you sure?”
He just nodded and sank to one knee so I could reach him better.
I had to use his front this time since his wings took up most of his back. After securing my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck, I leaned my head against his and softened my voice. “Everything will be alright.”
There was a quiet sniffle as he buried his face in my hair and hugged me tightly.
I promise.
Once he let go, he began the arduous task of climbing the elevator shaft. He used every appendage at his disposal, including his wings since they had impressive reach and claws of their own. Even without handholds, he still made the ascent look easy. The only evidence of a struggle was the numerous gouges left in the walls.
Meanwhile, my mind spun like coach wheels stuck in fresh mud. I wanted nothing more than to make him feel better, but I didn’t know how.
Probably by getting him professional help.
A weak smile crossed my face. I was confident the queens would get their son the best counseling Eidolon had to offer.
Maybe they’ll put in a good word for me too…
Regardless, I reassured myself the same way I did for Shade.
Everything will be alright.
When we finally reached the top, Shade gave his wings one big flap to boost us onto solid ground. The moment we separated, he rolled onto his back and clapped his hand on his heaving chest to soothe his panting.
It took him at least a minute to catch his breath. “That sucked.”
I leaned over his face and chanced a mischievous smile. “Not sure what you’re complaining about. I’m not tired at all.”
“Shhhhh—” He pressed his finger to my lips before dropping his hand back onto his chest with a thud. “At least one of us is having fun…”
“Fun is a strong word.” I got up and readjusted my hip covering. “Now then, you stay here while I check for my stuff.”
“What? Why?”
“Because I don’t want you getting even more upset.”
“Why would I?”
My brows went up. “Have you never seen Xythe’s room?”
“No.” He sat up and glanced over his shoulder at the door. “What’s in there?”
I think he forgot about the wings…
“Believe me, you don’t want to know.” I was about to take a step but didn’t get the chance.
“Hold on,” he took hold of my ankle, “you can’t just say something that cryptic and expect me not to look,” he complained, pouting and giving my leg a few light tugs.
I sighed and leaned down to look him dead in the eye. “Shade, I’m not trying to be annoying. Going in there will not make you feel better right now.”
His eyes widened a little, but he remained quiet.
I put my hand on his shoulder and softened my tone. “You need to trust me on this.”
He stared at me for a few seconds before looking at Xythe’s door again. Eventually, he turned back around and lowered his gaze with a reluctant nod.
Thank you…
I leaned closer and kissed his cheek. “Try to think about something else for a minute, alright? I’ll be right back.”
Especially if my trunk isn’t in there.
Once Shade’s back was to the door, I quickly slipped through and closed it behind me.
I hate this room so much.
It felt like every trophy was staring at me, but most were actually facing Xythe’s bed. I hadn’t noticed the first time.
Yeeaaahhh, I didn’t need that insight.
Heading in the direction I left my trunk, I kept my gaze down to avoid seeing the morbid decorations as much as possible. Unfortunately, this more or less resulted in direct eye contact with the Human leather rug.
Fuck, I forgot about that—
After a sharp inhale and violent shudder, I noticed my trunk still sitting on said rug.
Phew…
Despite what Shade said in the stairwell, I was still amazed Xythe hadn’t ditched it.
To be fair, he does like holding on to things for a long time.
Shaking my head a little, I opened the trunk and was relieved to find the contents seemingly untouched. Even though the spare outfits were just identical copies of my destroyed Castle Veil uniform, clothes were clothes.
I can’t wait until I can wear my own again.
With a heavy sigh, I got dressed, fixed my hair, and replaced my various ear piercings to the point of looking exactly the same as when I first showed up. It was nice to be clothed again, but the real joy came when I fished out the small portrait of myself.
Thank the gods it’s still here.
I was about to flee the horrid room but paused when my gaze landed on the wall of severed wings. Specifically, the large pair right in the middle.
Unbelievable—
Huffing in disgust, I stormed over and climbed onto the headboard so I could reach the skeletal remains of infant Shade’s wings, which I carefully pulled off the wall and laid on the bed. After staring at them for a few moments, I concealed them under the sheets. This was probably weird, but I couldn’t stand the sight of them as such a demented trophy.
Rest in peace.
Portrait in hand, I eagerly left the room and sealed it behind me. When I looked at Shade, he was sitting on the edge of the elevator shaft with his legs dangling over the edge and his back still to the door. He hadn’t reacted at all when it opened and closed.
I’m definitely glad I made him wait out here.
With a deep but silent breath, I went over and sat next to him. “Are you alright?”
His voice was feeble when he finally spoke. “Is it possible Xythe secretly loved me but refused to admit it? Even just a little bit?”
My throat tightened. “I think we both know the answer to that.”
He nodded sullenly and watched his hands as he toyed with them in his lap.
“Do you wish he had?”
There was no reply at first. “I don’t know…” After a long pause, he shook his head. “I don’t think so…”
“You can say yes.”
He shook his head again. “I don’t want to.”
“And you don’t have to.”
Neither of us said anything for a few minutes.
Shade was the one to break the silence. “I know he only wanted me for the worst reasons, but he always enjoyed himself when we spent time together. I mean, now I know he was faking it, but…” He let out a shaky exhale. “I just… I guess I just thought after a thousand years he might’ve taken a liking to me…”
I almost wish he did.
It broke my heart to see him like this. “If it’s any consolation, I don’t think he liked anyone. Even his own subjects.”
Shade said nothing as he continued staring at his long, Demonic claws.
I’m sorry. I know that doesn’t mean much…
A few more minutes passed.
He broke the silence with a sniffle this time. “I can’t believe I fell for his lies my entire life. I can’t believe I thought he loved me.” He shook his head again. “I loved him from the very beginning. I loved him so much.” Tears welled in his eyes as he watched his hands start to tremble. “Why couldn’t he just love me back? Why?”
My chest tightened so much it hurt.
He clenched his eyes shut and choked out a quiet sob. “Why was I so stupid?”
I felt completely useless as tears began streaming down his face.
Is this how I sounded to him?
It took a moment to find my voice. “Shade, look at me.”
He just hung his head more.
I turned his face toward mine. “Please.”
There was a pause before he slowly opened his eyes.
I held his face with both hands and used my thumbs to wipe away his tears. “Do you remember what you wrote for me in the spirit den?”
He nodded weakly.
“Out loud.”
There was another pause, this time accompanied by a sniffle. “That you weren’t stupid, and nothing that happened to you was your fault.”
I raised my brows and tilted my head toward him.
He just looked more upset. “This is different.”
“How?”
It took at least ten seconds for him to come up with an answer. “Roänach didn’t reveal his true nature until he had you at his mercy. Xythe isolated and silenced me for most of my life, but I still loved him.”
I pulled his face a little closer. “How could you have known any better?”
He almost sounded desperate. “I never saw the other kids isolated or silenced.”
“Shade—”
“I-I should’ve realized something was wrong—”
“Shade.”
He froze and stared at me with wide eyes.
I shook my head and softened my voice. “You’re never going to convince me, your mothers, anyone, that you were stupid or that this was somehow your fault, so stop trying to convince yourself. Don’t you think you’ve been lied to long enough?”
Another tear came down his cheek, but he said nothing for quite a while. Eventually, he sniffled again and nodded into my hands. “It just seems so obvious in hindsight.”
“I know, but it doesn’t change who’s at fault. The blame lies solely at Xythe’s feet, no one else’s, and especially not yours.”
Despite lingering tears, he managed the ghost of a smile. “I’ll try not to blame myself for what Xythe did if you promise not to blame yourself for what Roänach did.”
The corners of my mouth turned up a little. “If I could promise that, I would have by now. We’ll both just have to try our best.”
His smile remained intact as he rested his forehead on mine. “Thank you for arguing with me about this.”
“Any time.”
He silently leaned on me for a few minutes. “Is it okay if we talk about something else?”
“Of course.”
With one last sniffle, he pulled back and glanced down at my lap. “Is that the portrait you told me about?”
I nodded and held it upright so we could both see it. “I wish you could have met Miri. She would have loved painting you.”
“You keep using the past tense. Is she gone?”
“She was a mortal Human, so she would have passed away a couple of centuries ago. This is all I have left of her.”
“I can see why it’s so important to you.”
“Yeah, but for a slightly selfish reason too.”
“What do you mean?”
I traced my painted jawline with my finger. “Vampires don’t have reflections, so this is the only way I can see my face. Without the portrait, I probably would’ve forgotten it by now.”
Shade was speechless for a moment. “Oh… Well, it’s really good. It looks exactly like you.”
“Almost.”
“Why just almost?”
I turned my head toward him. “Notice something different?”
His brows slowly furrowed as he glanced back and forth between my face and the portrait.
“Do you really not—”
“Wait, wait, wait, don’t tell me.”
I watched him struggle for a few seconds. “Shade—”
“N-No, I can do it!”
I waited for an answer that never came.
Eventually, he stopped on me and twiddled his thumbs awkwardly. “Okay, tell me.”
Without a word, I pointed to the scars on my face and neck.
His eyes shot wide. “I-I knew that.”
I frowned at him. “You don’t have to pretend you don’t see them.”
He frowned right back. “I wasn’t. Why would I do that?”
I blinked a few times. “I… I guess I just figured most people would lie to avoid hurting my feelings.”
“You never made a big deal out of them, so I thought they didn’t bother you.”
Oh.
“Fair enough, I suppose that’s on me.” I paused and let slip a quiet sigh. “If I’d seen them, I probably would’ve fixated on them more.”
“Why?”
My throat tightened as I ran my fingertips down the massive scar on my face and over the marks on my neck. “I can tell they’re hideous.”
It probably looks like someone threw an axe at me…
Shade tilted his head. “I don’t think they’re hideous.”
“Please don’t lie just to—”
“I’m not.” He pointed right at my face. “Listen, if you’re allowed to say nothing was my fault, I’m allowed to say nothing makes you hideous. Especially your scars.”
“But—”
“Ahp, this isn’t up for debate.” He flashed a smile. “Sorry.”
I didn’t smile back.
His grin faltered after a few seconds. “Why do you think they’re hideous?”
My gaze fell. “Maybe this makes me vain, but I like to think I was relatively attractive back in the day. How could I look even halfway decent with this huge gash in my face?”
Like damaged goods…
He said nothing for a moment. “If other people had similar scars, would you consider them unattractive?”
I shook my head weakly.
“Alright, so why are you the exception?”
It took a full minute for me to finally look at him again. My throat was still tight.
This time, his smile was soft instead of playful. “Maybe I just get lost in your eyes, but I barely ever notice your scars. Even when I do, they change nothing.” He caressed my cheek as if the huge blemish wasn’t even there. “When I look at you, I see a beautiful man who makes my heart race with just a smile. You’re stunning, you’ve always been stunning, and you’ll always be stunning.”
My whole body shivered as I stared into his eyes.
No arguing, remember?
A fragile but genuine smile tugged my lips as I hugged him tightly. “Thank you, Shade.”
He nodded and returned the embrace. “I meant every word.”
We just sat there hugging for a few minutes.
All of a sudden, he chuckled and squeezed me in his arms. “And if anyone insults you, I’ll glare at them until they apologize.”
I grinned into his neck. “I’m almost positive a death glare from you would be literal.”
“Oh, come on, I’m not that scary.”
“You’re pretty scary.”
“And yet, you’re hugging me.”
“Maybe I like scary.”
“You just like my giant muscles.”
I shifted enough to smile at him. “It is rather satisfying when you carry me around as if I weigh nothing, but I like you for at least one other reason.”
He grinned back and effortlessly hoisted me up for a kiss. “Nope, it’s just one reason, and it’s how tall I am. Don’t bother denying it.”
“Damn, you got me.”
“I knew it.”
We both laughed and shared another kiss. My heart wasn’t beating, but the butterflies in my stomach made up for it.
His presence just gets more and more comforting.
I was the one to break the kiss. “Alright, we should probably head back before the others get suspicious.”
“Is the portrait all you’re bringing?”
“Would you like to carry my heavy trunk?”
“I mean… We did just acknowledge my giant muscles…”
But we left it behind anyway. I didn’t want the spare uniforms, and I could replace everything else. The portrait was all I cared about.
Once I was secured to his front like before, Shade carefully dropped over the edge of the elevator shaft and slowly descended by dragging his wingtip claws down the walls.
The sound was unpleasant.
Most of the Demons had dispersed by the time we arrived at the entrance hall, but a few small groups lingered here and there. The most recognizable figure was Daryn, who was looking outside from where he stood near the wide-open main doors. Fortunately, it was still dark out, so it was safe for him to do so.
He turned and looked me up and down as we approached. “Nice outfit.”
Shade and I stopped next to him. “It’s the uniform Roänach makes me wear.”
He flicked his wrist without missing a beat. “Terrible outfit.”
I couldn’t help but grin a little.
“Is it at least better than being almost naked?”
“Marginally.”
He briefly eyed my scars before turning back to the open doorway, thumbing the bite marks on his own neck as he did so. “Well, for what it’s worth, you look good regardless.”
My smile widened.
I guess Shade was right.
“Where are the queens?”
He nodded outside. “Talking to some Starlight Demons. Shame it’s cloudy, but, stars or no stars, they can finally enjoy real nighttime with that gods-awful solar shield gone.”
Which reminds me—
I went over to the doors but stopped on the threshold, uncertain if my travel restrictions had been restored with me. The solar shield had been gone for a while, but I hadn’t disintegrated yet.
It’s technically the same ground, I guess…
A grunt of annoyance slipped out as I shook my head.
This is stupid.
I hesitated a few more seconds before gingerly touching the ground with the toe of my boot.
Nothing happened.
Thank the gods…
There was a huge grin on my face as I confidently strode outside and took a deep breath once out in the open. I didn’t care that I didn’t need to. The fresh air was delightful.
That cave was more suffocating than I thought.
It wasn’t long before the queens and group of Starlight Demons looked over. Elvylli and Sathira smiled at first, but their joy faded when they peered around me at the open doorway. When I turned to look as well, Shade stood frozen on the threshold, his gaze locked on the ground where I had tapped my boot. He looked genuinely terrified.
“Shade? What’s wrong?”
His wide eyes were darting back and forth. “I’ve never stepped foot outside the castle.”
Shit, I forgot about that—
“Xythe forbade it, and I didn’t want him to get mad at me…”
The queens joined me before I could say anything.
Sathira waved to get his attention. “It’s alright, sweetheart. We’re safe and sound out here.” When he looked over, she gestured to the three of us. “See?”
He just shuddered and looked down again.
I smiled despite knowing he wouldn’t see it. “I promise nothing bad will happen.”
Come on, Shade. You can do it.
After what felt like forever, he cautiously tapped the ground with one foot the same way I had done.
Keep going, you’re right there—
Eventually, he took one step and clenched his eyes shut.
His mothers froze next to me.
It took at least a minute for Shade to crack an eye open. When he finally opened both and took in his surroundings, his visible dread eased a little. “I’m outside.”
My throat tightened when Elvylli covered her mouth with both hands.
Shade looked up at the clouds and smiled brightly. “I’m outside!” He started toward us but stopped halfway and began spinning around with the purest elation I had ever seen. “I’m outside!”
As I took my turn covering my mouth, Elvylli and Sathira rushed their son and pulled him into a shared hug. Both were crying tears of joy.
Shade nearly collapsed into them and broke down sobbing. “I-I’m outside—”
Sathira pulled his head down and nuzzled his face. “You’re finally free, sweetheart.”
I could barely see through my own tears as I watched the three of them.
This moment alone was worth everything.
Chapter 25 ->
Soul of Solace: Chapter 23
Table of Contents
<- Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Athaeÿn
Covering up proved easier than expected. In the end, I tied what remained of my outfit’s innermost layer around my hips and slipped on my surprisingly intact boots to make walking more comfortable. It wasn’t the most secure arrangement, but it was serviceable.
And temporary.
When our group made it back to the castle stairway, Daryn stopped dead in his tracks and vehemently shook his head. “Ohhhh no. Nuh-uh. I counted nine billion steps on the way down, and that was after falling down half of them. I absolutely refuse to climb all the way back up.”
“Gods, you are such a drama queen,” Elvylli muttered under her breath.
“No, you are the queen of drama, and that illustrious display of screeching whilst immolating Xythe served as your coronation. What a performance. I, on the other hand,” he splayed his fingers across his chest, “am reasonably refusing to exert myself when there is an obvious and preferable alternative to giving myself a leg cramp.”
“You do realize I could just fly up the stairwell without you, right?”
“Empty threats. However, if you speak with sincerity,” he turned to Sathira, “I can just ask your wife instead.”
She was already smirking. “No.”
He threw his arms out to the sides before jamming his fists into his hips. “You two are so mean to me.” After pouting for a moment, he perked up but was beaten to the punch by Elvylli.
“Don’t enable him, sweetheart,” she whispered to Shade.
Daryn pointed right at her face. “Hey.” He then pointed at Shade. “He’s a grown-ass adult who can make his own decisions!”
Much to Daryn’s wide-eyed horror, Shade glanced at his mothers before offering him an awkward, toothy smile.
This time, Daryn threw his hands up in exasperation. “Oh, good. We got a momma’s boy.”
Elvylli grinned and pinch-tugged his ear. “I was never going to make you walk up the stairs, dumbass. You’re the one who brought it up and proceeded to make a scene.”
He averted his gaze and scratched his cheek. “I, uhh… ahem, have been known to be a bit dramatic on occasion…”
“Rare occasion.”
Meanwhile, Sathira smiled at me and Shade. “We’ll be tending to the Demons upstairs. Take all the time you need and join us when you’re ready.”
Shade nodded and pulled his mothers into a group hug. “Thank you. We shouldn’t be long.”
Elvylli and Sathira each took a turn gently pulling his head down and kissing his forehead. After sharing one more loving smile with him, they took off with Daryn and disappeared up the stairwell.
The echoes of their wingbeats were still reverberating throughout the cave when I glanced up at Shade, whose eyes were misty as he stared after them.
Damn, I really wish I hadn’t missed their initial reunion.
Shaking my head a little, I smiled and held his hand. “So, is it nice to finally have your real parents?”
He wiped his eyes with his free hand. “They’re everything I could have hoped for.”
“And now you have the wings to match.” As I pulled back and caressed one of them, my smile faded over the lingering corruption. “Your soul fixed quite a bit. Why not everything?”
“I’m not sure.” He turned his hands over and peered down at his pelvis and legs. “Maybe because there’s technically nothing wrong with them? I mean, everything works just fine,” he added, sticking his foot out and rotating it a few times. His tone became a bit anxious when his gaze drifted back to mine. “You sound disappointed. Does it look bad?”
I waved my hands to shoo away his concern. “No, not at all. I’m just upset because the original change happened without your consent, but if you’re happy, I’m happy.” I offered a smile to prove it. “Either way, your uniqueness is one of a kind. I think that’s pretty cool.”
He blinked a few times before grinning at his feet. “Works for me! Besides, I’d probably have to relearn how to walk if I suddenly had legs like yours.”
“True, I hadn’t even thought of that. Well, I’m just glad you got your wings back. They really complete the Arbiter look.”
His smile slowly morphed into a frown. “Wait a minute. Wings mean I have to learn something anyway.”
The scowl on his face drew an unattractive laugh through my nose. “I’m sure your mothers will happily teach you. What better way to bond and catch up on lost time?”
His big smile came back as he hugged himself with his wings.
I grinned with him. “And, learning to fly sounds way more fun than relearning to walk.”
“Yeah, but at least walking doesn't risk falling to my death.”
“It does if you walk off a cliff.”
He took his turn snorting a laugh. “I should probably avoid those regardless.” After chuckling for a few seconds, he glanced at the tunnel in the back wall. “Before we head up, want to say goodbye to the spirits with me?”
My joy promptly disintegrated.
Lune…
I put my hand on my chest again. The faint warmth was still there, but it only made me feel marginally better. “Yes, of course…”
Shade said nothing for a moment. “You know,” he put his arm around my shoulders, “Lune touched my soul before bringing you back.”
My throat tightened. “Really?”
He smiled and put his hand over mine where it remained on my chest. “I truly believe Lune is still with both of us.”
As always, his smile was contagious. “I hope you’re right.”
With that, he led the way to the riverbank once more. It was an odd feeling, knowing it was probably the last time, and I hadn’t even been there that long.
I can only imagine how he feels.
Upon arrival, he retrieved the zephyr harp and flopped me over one shoulder to cross the river. Despite his one-handed grip, not even the most powerful hurricane could have ripped me away from him.
Thank the gods he’s so strong.
The moment we set foot in the spirit den, we were rushed by the Wights and Wisps.
Shade was startled when the latter made a beeline for him. “What the—” He stood gawking at the white, golden-eyed spirits dancing around his head. “These three have never shown interest in me before.”
“Those are Wisps. They’re drawn to living things with souls.”
“Ohhh, no wonder they always ignored me.” As his hand drifted to his chest, he looked at the three dark spirits twirling around me. “What are those called?”
“Wights. They prefer dead things but are primarily repulsed by souls, hence why they still liked you even though you were alive.”
His brows furrowed a bit. “I remember you saying you didn’t have a soul.”
I nodded. “Its absence is part of what makes me Undead.”
“Is yours hidden somewhere like mine was?”
I shook my head this time. “Mine’s been long gone for three hundred years. When Roänach killed me, he used it to summon a new Demon. He does the same with all his vassals. Everyone he kills, actually.” I held my hand up and watched one of the Wights phase through my palm like last time. “I’m nothing more than a reanimated corpse. Twice over, now…”
My explanation was followed by depressing silence.
Yeah, I wouldn’t know what to say either…
Eventually, Shade turned to me and held my shoulders with both hands. “Well, at least this time it was Lune who brought you back.” He smiled warmly. “That’s better than Roänach, right?”
It…
After a few moments, I managed a small smile.
Yeah, it is.
As I gazed into his brilliant amber eyes, I realized just how grateful I was to do so. Without Lune, I never would have seen him again. I was still Undead, but all Roänach did was reawaken me. Lune had restored me. Revived me.
Lune did more for me than it could ever know.
My smile brightened. “I’d much rather be here because of a friend than a master.”
He pulled me into a hug. “Am I selfish for being glad you ended up here?”
I melted into his warm embrace. “Some might think so, but I don’t regret finding you."
“Even though you died again?”
“Saving you was worth it,” I muttered into his chest, feeling him shiver a little.
We just stood there hugging for a few minutes. A few wonderful minutes.
Thank you, Lune…
Shade finally pulled back just enough to smile down at me. “Would you like to hear the song I silently played on the riverbank?”
“I would love that.”
He sat on the soft cloud moss and patted his left thigh for me. Once I settled there and leaned back on him, he rested the harp on his other thigh and gave it a quick strum. I could feel him vibrate with joy when it actually made a sound.
And from now on, it always will.
Once he wrapped his left arm around me to get both hands on the harp, he began playing one of the most intricate songs I’d ever heard.
He really wrote this himself?
It was nothing less than a professionally written piece that had me shivering with rapture in under a minute.
His playing is beautiful.
The gentle melody was a soothing whisper to my senses, something akin to midnight fog drifting through a sleeping forest, or a meadow of wildflowers shimmering with morning dew. I had never heard such serene tranquility in a song before. Every note had its own heartbeat.
I could listen to this for hours…
My eyes fell closed as my head slowly lolled sideways on his chest. Part of me wished there were lyrics so I could hear his deep, alluring voice layered into the song, but the instrumental music was more than enough.
It’s already perfect…
A few blissful minutes passed.
“Athaeÿn, look.”
When I cracked my eyes open, almost all the spirits were dancing around us in a hovering circle. Even the water and rock spirits were swaying in their luminous pools and squinting happily in their stacked piles. The endearing sight brought a smile to my face and warmth to my heart.
Wait—
By the time I pressed my hand to the center of my chest, the small flicker had become a steady, comforting heat that reached my shoulders. All of a sudden, I remembered Lune’s joy when I played the harp for Shade.
It really is Lune.
My throat tightened as I glanced up at Shade. “Do you feel that?”
He was smiling despite the mist in his eyes. “I do.”
I kept my hand on my chest as I lounged against him and watched the spirits dance.
The perfect excuse to play long and often.
When Shade finished the song, he sniffled quietly and slipped his hand between my back and his chest. “That was for you, Lune."
I gave him a moment before speaking. “I’m not exaggerating when I say that was the most beautiful piece I’ve ever heard.”
He smiled and wiped his eyes. “Thank you.” After watching the spirits disperse, he gently removed me from his lap and got up. “I’m leaving the harp for them to play with, so I’ll have to get another one someday,” he added, setting the instrument in the middle of the den.
I stood as well. “There are entire shops dedicated to music in Eidolon. I’ll gladly take you to all my favorites that are still in business.”
This caught his attention right away. “Are there really? Can I learn how to play other instruments too?”
“Yes and yes.”
He rushed back over and pulled me into a tight hug. “Thank you!”
“Y-You’re welcome,” I wheezed in his crushing embrace, “but you don’t need my permission.”
“Oh, right.” He let go and dropped to one knee so we were eye level with each other. “Sorry for making it weird,” he added with a slightly awkward chuckle.
I coughed out a laugh of my own. “It’s alright. I appreciate that you value my opinion.”
His amused smile relaxed. “I value far more than just that.”
I shivered a little but said nothing.
After a minute, he cradled my head with one hand and caressed my cheek with his thumb. “I’m so glad I got you back. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I’d lost you forever.”
With him kneeling at my height, it was impossible not to stare into his eyes. “You haven’t known me very long.” My voice weakened a bit. “I’m sure you would’ve been fine…”
He shook his head. “I don’t think you understand just how much you mean to me,” he leaned forward and held my face with both hands, “and not just because you saved my life.”
“Y-You’re just saying that.”
“I assure you my feelings go far deeper than just words.” The closer he got, the softer his tone became. “Let me prove it to you.”
“You already have,” I muttered, gripping his forearms in case my legs gave out.
How is he doing this—
My fingers started trembling. “I-I thought you had no experience with intimacy.”
I can’t breathe—
He paused with less than an inch between our lips.
No, don’t stop—
A smile crossed his face. “Maybe it just comes naturally—” His lips met mine before he even finished speaking.
O-Oh gods—
I inhaled sharply through my nose and clenched my eyes shut.
He’s kissing me—
An embarrassing whimper slipped out as I eagerly reciprocated. Desperately was probably more accurate.
I can’t believe it—
During my career, I had often taken the lead and always enjoyed doing so, but Shade’s initiative swept me off my feet and left me reeling. I couldn’t think clearly whatsoever. All I knew was that I had never felt so cherished in my entire life.
Don’t cry on his face.
It was becoming increasingly difficult not to.
And don’t overdo it.
As much as I wanted to have a full-blown make-out session, I knew we had important things to do. There would be better times and places.
This is more than enough for now.
With every intention of stopping before things escalated, I grabbed his face and deepened the kiss while I had the chance. Everything about him was powerful, and his lips were no exception.
He tastes so good—
I failed to contain a soft moan when his fingers slipped into my hair, but his deep inhale that followed almost brought me to my knees. It had become evident his ravenous hunger extended far beyond appetite. And yet, he remained gentle.
Don’t let go… not yet…
I succumbed to ecstasy over and over again, only to be resuscitated every time his hot breath hit the back of my throat.
He makes me feel so alive.
My hands were trembling when I reluctantly drew our kiss to a tender close. “We should probably go before we get too carried away,” I murmured, resting my forehead against his.
He smiled and nuzzled my cheek. “We can always pick up where we left off.”
I hope that’s a promise.
After we separated, I watched him say goodbye to all the spirits individually. The endeavor left us both teary-eyed. On the way out, he paused to give them one more bittersweet smile before finally turning and leaving the den, perhaps just indefinitely rather than forever.
Maybe we can visit them someday.
Meanwhile, my hand drifted to my chest as he disappeared into the tunnel.
I’ve definitely fallen for him.
I waved to the spirits and followed him out.
He’s the one.
Chapter 24 ->