break the chain

alex kang; 34, CMO at Alphatech. New Yorker, living the west coast life.

[khaoray]

a kdrama challenge • 3/7 male leads - yoo ji ho (one spring night)

“what i’ll say now isn’t a warning. it’s a threat. i said i would let other things slide, but not when it concerns my son. i’m not scared of anything. i’m never scared when it comes to my boy.”

[rreellaaxx-time]

191121 Blue Dragon Awards

[kateknowsdramas]

holyhaein: In London

[depressingxthings]

[alexkangs]

(-- @choixhyunjin

[choixhyunjin]

[ @alexkangs​ ]

Mature was a word Hyunjin thought had always described him. Around certain people, his maturity level would drop, sure. But this was new. The Hyunjin that wanted to run when things got too serious? When something became too difficult? Simply settling because it was easier? That version of him was gone. He had to admit all of the talks about adoption started out great, and the more real it became, the more he panicked a little on the inside. But now that they were home, now that he was holding this small, six month old baby in his arms, his heart honestly couldn’t feel anymore full in that moment. 

It was like he was completely awestruck. He barely even paced. Just stared down at Lyla cradled against his chest, finger gently brushing at her hair. One small label, one tiny inconvenience outside of her control, and no one had wanted her. He simply didn’t understand how because honestly? He was pretty sure he was already in love. “I think she’s starting to fall asleep,” Jin kept his voice down, finally moving a couple steps and looking up to find Alex with a smile. His attention ended up falling back to her mere seconds after though, smile still plastered on his lips. “Should probably take Cheddar out. It’s been a long day… You wanna hold her?”

[alexkangs]

Alex had always seemed like he had everything figured out for himself, which is why he often looked so calm and collected, but ever since Hyunjin showed up in his life he realized just how different things had been for him. From being more patient to allowing himself to be open to other sexualities? Yeah, he’d definitely changed. However, there had always been a constant in his life, and that was the fact that he wanted to be a father. Alex thought that when getting involved with Hyunjin, things would go slower for him and he would have to wait at least five more years... I mean, he was already thirty-four... by the time Hyunjin felt ready for it, he would already be too old... but he wasn’t expecting his boyfriend to kick off the talks about adoption.

It had been rough and anxiety-driven months of waiting. Of social workers doing background checks on both of them, of waking in the middle of the night to do a little crying in the bathroom because the system might not let them have this baby... this perfectly adorable baby that society cast out due to something beyond her control...

When he received the call from the foster care saying they had been approved to be her guardians, Alex was in the middle of a meeting so he couldn’t take the call. His heart stopped when he saw the name on the screen and he almost threw up. His heart was pounding on his throat as he called them back from inside the bathroom, just in case he indeed felt sick. The next words felt like music to his ears and he indeed cried as he called Jin to let him know the good news. Month after month they had worked on her nursery, and now that she was finally home, Alex could not be happier.

“Yeah, I’ll take her.” He smiled, gently taking Lyla into his arms and cradling the six-month old. “She’s perfect, you know...” Alex practically whispered, his gaze meeting his boyfriend’s. “She’s our baby, Jin.” He wasn’t one to get easily emotional, but as he averted his gaze from his baby to his boyfriend, then back to Lyla, Alex’s eyes watered again. “She’s all ours...” He leaned against Jin’s side then looked up, kissing his cheek. “Yeah, you should probably take Cheddar... I’ll change her and then put her to bed.”

[wonderfulcrazykawaii]

[jnghaeins]

[dreamcathcher5]

Jung Hae In & Kim Go Eun for Marie Claire September 2019

[junkobato]

Jung Hae In ❤️ Kim Go Eun

#couplegoals

[alexkangs]

jungxdal‌:

Dal wasn’t worried about quitting because she had some savings and well, if Alex found a new job soon, then she wouldn’t be jobless for a long time. Plus, it would give her time to bake and just spend more time with Tom and her friends. “I already feel better” She still felt like she needed to lay in bed for a week, but she felt happy and excited for Alex so it made her forget the cold she was experiencing. “I think he won’t freak out” Or at least she hoped he didn’t. She thought they were both on the same page so hopefully her confession wouldn’t be too surprising. “I think that’s exactly what I need”

Alex cocked his head while looking at her, not really buying her ‘I already feel better’ thing, so he just playfully rolled his eyes, then continued walking through the pharmacy’s aisles, trying not to look at the products on the shelves in case he was reminded of something completely unnecessary that he might need. He did, however, send Hyunjin a text to check if he wanted something from there, so maybe it could be a nice excuse to buy something he didn’t need. “I know for sure he won’t freak out.” Alex said with a smile while cupping her face in between his hands, then planting a kiss on her forehead. He then went ahead and grabbed the Tylenol, feeling his phone buzzing on his pocket and sighed after reading Jin’s negative response. “Do you need something else? Jin’s already warned me not to buy things I don’t need, so CVS is not fun anymore.” He practically pouted at his own words. He was older, independent, why did he need his boyfriend to control his expenses? “I mean... I could totally need some face masks, right? But noooooo... Mr. Choi says no.”

[alexkangs]

ameliaxrogers‌:

“Jae has all the privileges with me and honestly, those should be the only privileges that matter” She replied with a smile. She loved her husband a little too much. “I always imagined getting along with a younger sibling and Jin has been like that to me, even when I was no longer with Jae I never lost contact with Jin and kind of forced him to keep me as his dirty little secret” She said with a laughter. She never wanted to get in between the two brothers so she kept in touch with Jin and begged him not to tell Jae, which probably was an unfair move from her but she had already lost her husband, she didn’t want to lose someone who was like her brother. “Absolutely biased, won’t even try to deny it” She confessed, smiling. “Well, I made tons of mistakes and if we are together today is because Jaehyun had patience and never gave up, which I totally did. So yeah, I guess that’s my only tip, not to give up, even when things get really bad, don’t give up. And don’t assume things, that was my mistake too, I kept assuming things” And that had ended up breaking them apart. “Well, we are having twins, so if I was already freaking out about not knowing how to be a mother of one baby, now we are dealing with two. Kind of nervous about it but I’m hoping somehow I’ll just know what to do, you know, instincts and such”

“Being someone’s dirty little secret is usually something so juicy and yet---you made it sound like it was completely the opposite.” Which Alex was sure it was the case, because from the sound of it, Hyunjin was nothing like a younger brother to the woman. Besides, why would she go back to Jaehyun if she had romantic or sexual feelings to Hyunjin, right? Still, he listened to her in silence, letting her give her piece of advice on their relationship as requested while sipping on his smoothie. “I think we have that in common...” He pondered, tracing the outline of his cup with the tip of his finger. “Hyunjin and I had some communication problems at the beginning. I was unhappy, so I let him go. Lucky for me, he didn’t give up on me--on us, so now here we are.” Alex had to admit that things had changed considerably between them. Hyunjin was much more open now and even though things weren’t perfect, they were far better now. “Oh, wow... Twins?” He raised his brows, surprised. “I mean... that’s a good thing. Double the expenses, but parenthood isn’t something you can learn from books or from watching videos online. It’s a gut feeling. I learned a lot while helping my friend with his daughter. Does that mean I won’t make mistakes when I have kids of my own? Absolutely not. Just trust your gut. And If things get too overwhelming, Jin and I can always take the kids off your hands for the night if you’d like.”

[alexkangs]

jungxdal‌:

“Then you should put your passion in a place you like more then” Dal nodded, glad to know he was looking for another place if he didn’t feel passionate about the company. “I’ll go and give them my notice” Dal had absolute trust in Alex so she didn’t doubt or questioned his words. She could be jobless if Alex changed his mind but she never even thought about that, confident that better things would come for them in the future. “That’s very exciting!” Dal was happy for Alex, glad to know he had found someone to have these types of plans with. “I’ll tell him soon, I don’t think I can hold back anymore, it’s one of those things I just want to yell at his face the second I see him” She giggled, walking with Alex.

Since usually people gave two weeks notice, he didn’t think Dal would be without a job for too long, which was the ideal. He needed to settle on the selling of his assets in court, since Alphatech hadn’t gone public, thus there was no one to buy his assets, and also, he didn’t want to leave the company empty handed. He had put just as much blood sweat and tears in order to make things work there, so he deserved some compensation for that. “Focus on getting better first, hm?” With a smile, he poked the tip of her nose before heading to the cold medicine aisle. “Maybe don’t yell it to his face? Just don’t think too hard on it. The important is how you and him feel about it, not necessarily how you say it, you know?” He smiled, then picked up a Tylenol cold. “Would this work for you?”

[alexkangs]

ameliaxrogers‌:

“Oh you haven’t missed anything, I just love rubbing in Jae’s face how much I love his brother and how much he loves me, see, I don’t have siblings so having Jin in my life has been great” Specially because she met him when he was young and had seen him turn into this amazing man he was today. “Oh you should totally trust in his taste and talent” Amelia assured him, being her husband’s number one fan.  “I won’t help him decorate, I’ll let him believe he’s doing everything on his own, but I will make sure to give suggestions and positive feedback” She leaned in to whisper. “My husbands knows me too well, he’ll pretend I’m not getting involved just to keep me happy, act like it’s all him and that I’m not sending him 1000 messages about what I want” And she’ll do her best not to be too obnoxious. “Alien land is going great” She was decided to keep naming her baby as an alien until they got names. “I’m trying to be cool about everything and not freak out, you know, enjoy this pregnancy and just try to have a life as normal as I can have and I think it’s working fine?”

“I see...” Alex bobbed his head, pretending to be thinking hard about what Amelia had just said, then he shrugged. “Well... he was already there when Jin was born, so he has some sort of privileges, right?” He chuckling, thinking that Amelia’s way of putting things was actually amusing. “Eh... siblings are overrated. I have a younger one, but we don’t talk often. Or at all, for that matter.” If he was being honest, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d spoken to Daniel and he liked it that way. The last thing he wanted was for his brother to try and convert him or to call him a sinner or whatever the hell Daniel wanted to call him for being gay. “Aren’t you a little biased, though?” He squinted his eyes as a teasing smirk appeared on his lips. Where he had no doubt that Jaehyun was a talented architect, he wouldn’t not tease Amelia for thinking highly of her husband, just like he knew Hyunjin would do the same with him. “Oh, screw that. Don’t let him take all the credit, though.” He winked at the blonde. “Hyunjin told me a little about you guys... it’s one hell of a love story that you’ve got there. Any tips for us, mere beginners?” Although older than her, Alex hadn’t had a longlasting relationship like Amelia and Jaehyun’s, so he thought he could ask. “You don’t look like you’ve been freaking out... anything specific that had you freaking out over?”

[alexkangs]

ameliaxrogers‌:

“Welcome to the ‘I’m soft for Jin’ club, Jae is not invited to join” She said with a chuckle. She’s always had a soft spot for Jin, so much that she tended to treat him like her little brother even when he was a functional adult, so she was doing her best not to baby him so much now that he was in a relationship, and well, now that he wasn’t a kid anymore. “I love decorating places so if you ever need to find something new I’ll be happy to join. Jae has a good eye too, I told him he was free to work on the alien’s room as much as he wants but I’m not sure if he believes me” Because Amelia liked controlling things and of course she would have something to say about the baby’s room, but she was really trying. “But I think dogs need to have cute names like that, it gives it personality” She agreed with a chuckle. “Good, can you imagine a baby named like that? Maybe you should have a list of suggestions so you can choose from there and not from Jin’s weird brain”

“Why is Jaehyun not invited? Did I miss something?” Alex didn’t particularly know Jaehyun and who else to tell him about his brother in law than the woman married to him, right? So if there was a story Hyunjin hadn’t told him, Amelia definitely would. “Well, actually... we might rely on your husband’s expertise soon for decorating purposes, but I’ll let you Hyunjin let you in on that.” Not because he didn’t want to tell Amelia what it was, but he figured his boyfriend was the best person to tell her about it. Besides... would it be of bad taste to tell a pregnant woman that they wanted to start their own family as well? He didn’t want to steal anyone’s thunder, but he also wanted to be able to talk about this, so he’d let Jin handle it especially since due to knowing Amelia the longest, he would know how to break the news to her. “Honey--- it’s your baby’s room. Are you going to sit here and tell me you won’t help him decorate? Because that sounds like bullshit to me.” He smirked, winking at the blonde. “Maybe I should... although we’ve talked about some names here and there, I can never be sure with Hyunjin. But how’s everything going in baby land?”

[alexkangs]

jungxdal‌:

“I’m sure that I’d love it regardless of how much is there to see, I miss home at times so it would be nice to have a little reminder or Korea” Plus, she could always buy things to cook for Beth, since her roommate liked Korean meals a lot, and she loved cooking for those who had a place in her heart. “Then you should go for it, I’m sure you’ll be great parents and any kid will be lucky to have you two” And in her opinion, that was all a kid needed, two loving parents who would want the best for them.  “You had a lot of pressure too lately, so maybe it’s for the best, why put so much effort for something that you don’t feel passionate about?” Dal honestly thought that the second you didn’t feel right in a place you should question your reasons to be there, and it seemed like Alex was doing just that.  “Plus, if you’re going to start a family you need a stable job that makes you happy” And that was very important. “Just tell me where I should go and I’ll be there” She said confidently, very grateful that Alex wanted to keep working with her. “I know, that’s my problem, I keep overthinking”

“I still feel passionate about my job.” He clarified, although he didn’t think it was really needed. “But I’m not passionate about Alphatech anymore. I’m settling with the guys in court about my assets so I can dissolve my part in the partnership as we speak, so you should reach out to HR in the next few days to turn in your notice. But take a couple of days off first so you can recover from the cold and then do it. We’ve got time.” It wasn’t like Alex was leaving tomorrow and since he was parting ways in an amicable way, he would still be going to Alphatech to handle some things here and there and it should give Dal enough time. The mention of starting a family brought yet another smile to his lips. “I am planning on starting a family. So yes, I know it’s for the best. I’m glad you’re tagging along, because I feel like we work really well together.” As they stopped by the CVS, Alex stepped down from the car waited for Dal to join him so they could buy her cold medicine. “Stop worrying so much. I know that saying you love someone is a huge deal, but in the end, it’s how you feel... whether they like it or not, it’s how you feel and it’s valid. So feel it. Share it with him if you want, but don’t let it take over your life. The ‘telling him’ part of it.”

[alexkangs]

jungxdal‌:

“That would be really nice, It’s been almost a year since I moved from Korea and I still haven’t been there” It would be a nice way to think of home, hopefully she would find everything she needed without feeling homesick. “You should never hear most people because most people are not in you and Jin’s relationship. The only ones who know how strong your feelings are and how committed you are to each other is the two of us, don’t let anyone make you doubt about that” Dal didn’t think time had anything to do, and yes, she knew some couples were very intense at first and then those feelings faded, but she knew Alex and she knew he wouldn’t take a rushed decision if he didn’t think it was the right one, so she was confident on them. “I always want to hear whatever you have to say, whether I’m sick or not” She assured him with a gentle smile. “You’re leaving?” Dal liked alphatech because she felt comfortable there, but Taemin wasn’t there anymore and without Alex it seemed pointless to stay there. “I would follow you wherever you go, boss” She assured him, completely relieved to hear he wouldn’t leave her alone and that he would want her to go with him. “Not yet, but I want to, I’m just a sucker for romance so I want it to be really romantic”

“There’s not much to see, but maybe you’ll find your beauty products in one of their small shops. Here’s to hoping, right?” Alex smiled at her, before stopping at a red light. Usually, he didn’t let people in on his personal life and he would have never expected getting on this level of intimacy with his assistant, yet, here he was... and she seemed to know exactly what to tell him because right now, he was feeling more confident than ever. “I know...” He sighed, still smiling at Dal. “Hyunjin and I both want this. We’ve realized that we want a family.” Because theirs had failed to be loving and supportive. They wanted something of their own. A little one to bring more joy into their lives. He caught himself smiling at the thought as he kept driving. “Good. Because I think we work well together and I want you on my team. But yeah, I’m leaving. Things haven’t been good at Alphatech lately and I’d rather leave before I tarnish my name than claim blind loyalty and end up being the one playing the sad violin while the ship sinks.” And even though he wasn’t going to be a CMO, he’d been getting proposals from companies bigger than Alphatech, which mean more responsibilities and a bigger paycheck. “I’ve been talking to the people at Procter and Gamble and some other names I can’t disclosure yet, but I wanted to let you know.” Because it was the decent thing to do, right?  He chuckled at her answer. “Just don’t think too much. Sometimes when you plan too much, you end up waiting for a right moment that will never be right enough.”

[alexkangs]

ameliaxrogers‌:

“Fine, but maybe you can talk to that God so she cans end me a twin or something” Amelia pouted, why couldn’t she have one of those lucky moments when someone sent from heaven crosses her professional path? “Please, I’m very happy for you two and honestly, so glad you’re nice and my new partner in crime, but the carpets are so hard to clean and the smell never fades away, never!” So yes, she was happy Cheddar was trained now. “We totally should, Mike needs to run a little more so we could take them to the park and cross our fingers they don’t hate each other”

“I’ll put in a good word for you.” Alex smirked and winked at the blonde. He wished there was something he could do, but now that he was thinking about moving up in the ranks, he would need Dal more than ever. He could actually think to spare his assistant and send her on Amelia’s way, but---no. “See, my point exactly. Even though our house doesn’t have carpet floors because girl.... nobody has time to vacuum that bitch every weekend... I told Hyunjin it was his responsibility to potty train the puppy since he was the one who brought it home, but I’m soft when it comes to your brother in law, so I helped. I got rid of two rugs already and athough they were not that expensive, they gave our living room some life.” Plus, the first one had been a gift, so he felt bad giving it away. “Cheddar is very friendly, so I’m sure they’ll get along just fine. Also... Cheddar---I swear, Hyunjin and names are a wild ride. I told him if we ever had kids, he was not allowed to name them.”