Hi guys! Sooo I've been writing lately, and I came up with something for a writing contest. Thoughts? Btw it's a translated version.
On a splendid afternoon, as I sat drinking my café au lait, I was struck by memories I thought I had abandoned in the ditch of oblivion. Nevertheless, I took the time to recall them. The very writing of this text is done with my tormentor in mind—one I long sought to hide from the eyes of others… To open my thoughts and set them free by writing a pamphlet seems a far better idea.
There is no need for an introduction; you know this Monster. She has no fixed appearance, form, or substance. Sometimes, I find myself visualizing her as a trail of smoke, dreadfully toxic and unbreathable. Our breath alone sustains her. That same breath she tortures to the brink of agony, shielded by the illusion of fulfillment she allows us to conceive. Like an adult unable to flush out a child gifted at hide-and-seek, we cannot manage to catch her.
The Monster unravels the knots of our dreams—those that seem too complex to realize—so that we might renounce some existential goal. She slips into our daily lives unnoticed, yet impossible to deny. Her implicit intentions prevent us from seeing her undo the other knots binding us to life. Truly, there is nothing more malevolent than her.
Imagine a key. It serves to keep your most intimate room secret. Thus, you enter your sanctuary. But what happens if you lose that key, and you need it to find yourself outside? What use is a lair in which to protect one's precious belongings and silent states of mind, if one ends up unable to leave? If no one can damage them anyway? To perish there. The key then becomes the means of locking oneself away, sometimes forever.
Believe it or not, this key is right before your eyes. The Monster, however, conceals it so immutably that she makes you a prisoner of her grip. And there it is: your soul is squeezed between her nimble hands. A true mistress of sentiment, she traverses your thoughts and flashes of lucidity to reduce them to nothingness. Every consciousness can be considered porous to her schemes. She interferes with you, taking advantage of your vulnerability.
However, like the key, the Monster is a double-edged sword. Your body empties of its vitality. It appears alterable, devoid of strength, its link to the sensible world broken forever. If one of your neighbors took the trouble to look at you, they would see that your end is near. The Monster has stripped you of your zest for life. With her powers, she metamorphoses life into a heavy burden weighing on every heartbeat.
Because of her, you are no longer a whole person. Only another of her victims, drowned in an ocean of disarray.
She had taken hold of me a long time ago. One rainy day, I woke up and suddenly felt the urge to rebel. The Monster, seated upon my inner throne, could not distinguish me from her position. So, I chose to take advantage of her only weakness to seize a pen and a sheet of paper. I began to write, and joy took hold of my being. Finally, I managed to live again. I poured onto the paper all my thoughts, my permanent distress. I was in pain, and I decided to become fully conscious of it. Then the sun gradually returned to the sky, a smile found its place on my lips, and creativity filled my spirit. I could hear a dog barking gaily in the distance. I was happy, without a trace of guilt.
But the Monster had more than one trick in her bag. She felt this euphoria; the rays of sunlight pierced through her like shimmering blades. Suddenly, my hands reduced my page to a rag. I had started to break my pen. The next moment, I could only use my eyes to witness what she had made me do. The sun had disappeared once more. I felt powerless again. The Monster had snatched away my freedom without any mercy.
Then, long after, I led my battle against the Monster. And, by chance, you come across my pamphlet, which stirs your sensibility. This is why I decide to write it. So that a revolutionary ascent may seize you, allowing you to regain control over yourself. To preserve your existence from her grip!
What’s that you say? That it is impossible to face her? That thriving and flourishing are no longer an option? Nonsense. Mere excuses born of the fear of confronting her.
The Monster will never hold me for long again. Knowing her sleight-of-hand all too well, I shall not surrender to gloom a second time. And my self-abnegation will be heard.
Do not let yourself be coaxed by her comforting charms, by the disconcerting ease of surrendering to her as if to an angel from heaven. Her voice enters your ears, giving you the impression that she is the only one who can decipher your misfortune. Her presence fills the void left in the room by a loved one whom we shall never see again. Her clarity shines so brightly that it is impossible to perceive all her darkness at first glance. The Monster is the only thing we manage to cling to, even though she is the cause of our being’s faltering state. This devastating beauty is so dear to your eyes that you fear being brought back to society. Her mortal embrace feels so warm, you might ask, how could I dare to slander her so?
But yes, of course! The Monster who wants to consume you only desires your well-being; everyone knows that. And yet, if you only knew what monstrosity she is capable of… Nay, I would prefer that you did not know. Nevertheless, you must be aware of this. The Monster is depression. And she is something else entirely. I leave you to interpret her as you wish. In the past, I knew her, and I realized she had no specific face. We cannot know who we are aiming at. Discerning her is by no means obvious, for she can don any physiognomy depending on her victim. She is, indeed, brilliantly deceitful!
Come to me again, if you feel capable! I will not let you reach me anytime soon, you sycophant. Beware! You caught me by surprise before. Except, this time, your charms and sweet melodies will no longer dilute my guard. My ankles will no longer be stained with blood from your devious barbed wire. My body and mind will no longer be constantly malleable under your spells. You hold no more secrets from me; I would recognize you from a myriad of places.
My strength has returned, and I am not afraid to affirm it.
germansingergirl
romaincrisis
stormborns
annaxmalina
jbbartram-illu
theartofmadeline
turnnoffyourmind
kianamaiart
