Hi again, so yeah. . . NOT DOING GREAT, this new med sucks shit so far, having more mouth sores and gut issues than the IV chemo. . . But the effect on my feet is absolutely the worst, it already feels like I'm walking on burning sand and it's barely been four weeks. . . Supposedly the side effects from Xeloda aren't as cumulative as other chemo meds, but I just finished the first cycle and the first week of the second cycle has definitely been worse. :/
I don't understand how I can manage to get through Adriamycin, one of the infamously brutal chemo meds, without experiencing half as many side effects as many people do. . . And then have some oral chemo kick my ass like this??? What the fuck.
I ran out of time covered by MA's medical leave act, and though my union covers short term disability. . . It pays half as much, and the other checks were already 3/4 of my original (meager) paycheck. I am extremely grateful that my health insurance has covered everything related to treatment, but expenses outside of that are killing me right now. I really need to go back to work, but I have to be on my feet all day, doing a lot of physical work that left my feet sore on a GOOD day. There's no way I can go back to working five days a week until I get these side effects under control. :'[
I REALLY don't like to ask for help because I am a creature full of shame and misplaced pride, but my financial situation was already precarious before this started so now I am uhhh. . . Kinda fucked!!! My cousin was kind enough to set a Gofundme (thank god, cuz I don't think I could've willed myself to do one myself) but I'm hesitant to share it around (partly because it unintentionally misgenders me lmao, I'm not out to my family about being nonbinary so it's not like my cousin did it on purpose). I know that's small potatoes but I'm just a nervous wreck about all of this. . .
IDK WHAT TO DO, let me think about it and I'll make a post later this week. . . I'd like to find a way people can donate and I can send them something in return. . . Thank you for your continued support, patience, and well wishes, it means a lot to me. 💖















