continued from here with @kakahshi <3
iruka has watched the frustration steadily build within kakashi for the better part of the afternoon. he recognizes his tells like they are an extension of himself. the tension across his shoulders. the way his gaze falls on his own hands with an intensity bordering on violent. the heavy exhale like a sigh that accompanies his words. underneath his mask, iruka is sure kakashi's jaw is set, his teeth clamped down, beloved lips pulled into a grimace like a snarl.
but he isn't fazed. iruka is an excellent teacher and that means he is patient. patient enough to explain and adjust and walk a student through a skill over and over again if needed, especially when that student happens to be his husband. it's funny, how this moment reminds him a little of naruto, who struggled like this often, before he finally had a breakthrough ( iruka just hopes kakashi's own breakthrough will not involve himself narrowly escaping death or sustaining injuries he can still feel on the coldest days of winter ). unlike naruto, kakashi is used to picking things up, quickly and adeptly, but iruka had known this wouldn't be easy for him. he'd known it would take time and gentle coaxing and a number of failures to help kakashi see his chakra, his hands, his very being as capable of healing. but iruka believes he is, with every fiber of his being, and he is not in the habit of being wrong.
when kakashi tries again, iruka closes his eyes, tunes in to the energy buzzing between kakashi's palm and his own. it's far less volatile than the attempt before, taking the shape of something humming rather than sparking. it's slow-moving and a little messy, but - yes, there it is. irurka smiles as he feels the familiar pull of flesh back together. he opens his eyes to watch kakashi's while he works, the deep concentration etched into his face, the way he holds iruka's hand so tightly in his own.
then, there is a slip in kakashi's concentration, a sudden shock, and his husband recoils. it doesn't hurt, merely stings alongside the wound that reopens across his palm. but it's a setback, one kakashi isn't taking well, the way he tries to throw in the towel before agreeing to go one more time. it's admirable, it touches deep into iruka's heart, how hard kakashi is willing to try for him. but they're due for a change in tactics.
"that was good. i know it doesn't feel like it, but you're doing really well." iruka adjusts the position of their hands once kakashi replaces his, threads their fingers together to give him some leverage. "you're so tense. you need to relax, love." from their joined hands, iruka tugs kakashi forward and leans in to meet him, pulling his mask down with his free hand. he kisses him, slow and drawn out, firm enough to ground him. iruka lets his hand linger, his thumb pressing gently into kakashi's jaw, and it remains there when he pulls his lips away, caressing the skin rarely exposed under the sunlight. "feel any better?"
iruka looks at him and it is clear, in his eyes, in his easy smile, that he has utter belief that kakashi can do this. maybe not today, but sometime, eventually. "if you need something to think about, you can think about this." iruka kisses him again, this time quicker, merely punctuation to make his point. "that's what i do when i heal you. i think about the last time we kissed." there's a blush at the admission to something so vulnerable, so private to only exist in his mind, but iruka smiles wider, warmer, fonder, if it is even possible.