There are times when I miss you. All of you.
I miss your voices. Your presence. The fact that you cared so much.
But now, I don't think I could ever go back, because of how you all treated me towards the end. I was going through a hellish time in a toxic environment and you all chose to leave me.
You all put the blood of our dead friendships on my hands and expected me to fix it. You said I didn't do enough to even try.
So, no. I wouldn't come back if I was asked to.
I wish things could've been different too. I don't wish ill for any of you, but yes, I am slightly bitter.
I hope you're all happier without me.
I'm moving on.
Hello JSE Community. You need to read this, we need to talk. /srs
I didn't want to do this, but I see I've been left with no choice. So everyone strap in, because this will be long and messy, but it needs to happen before anyone else gets manipulated and fooled. I can't take being silent anymore and watching innocent people continue to feed into this insatiable need for pity and continuous manipulation and lying.
I know this will be hard for many people, and it was extremely hard for me too. Please just keep that in mind when you read this. I don't want you to think this is me flinging mud and if I'm being more vulnerable than I'm comfortable with here? Quite honestly I've been scared to do this because I don't want to lose friendships, or make half the community to think I'm evil or think less of me for doing this. But now I see this is necessary because Rogue will stop at nothing to keep others blind to the truth.
I'd also like to make a point for anyone coming into this skeptical of me and my friends, just as a precaution: I started writing this at 7:30am. I finished writing this at 1:00pm. If I was lying or had anything to gain from this, would I really waste that long writing this timeline out?
So with that, let's deep dive into the last year and a half, and to a certain degree, longer. I have screenshot proof of pictures, texts, and more that I'll provide here or if asked. I'll even reblog this to add more since Tumblr has a limit and I would definitely exceed it.
Anyway, let's make things abundantly clear:
@rogue-of-broken-time is a fraud and a manipulator.
DISCLAIMER IN ADVANCE: DO NOT SEND ROGUE HATE OR HARASS HER. THIS IS NOT THE INTENT OF THIS POST. THIS POST IS FOR EVERYONE'S AWARENESS BECAUSE IT HAS BEEN MADE CLEAR TO THOSE OF US THIS POST INVOLVES THAT THIS IS NECESSARY FOR THE JSE COMMUNITY TO KNOW.
Rogue and I were friends since late 2017 up until this past summer. She was one of the first people I ever followed on Tumblr and I looked up to her for longer than I'd like to say. And now, for reasons we'll get into, I regret that deeply. Never meet your heroes.
Things really started coming to a head last year, 6 years in to our friendship, late last October. Rogue, her roommate and my friend (I'll be calling her Nina for privacy), our other friend Jenny (also an alias), and me all went down to Texas for our other friend Jan's (alias) wedding. It was awesome, I was psyched to meet Rogue irl, things were fabulous. You might've even seen Rogue and I posting about meeting up.
And then came the day we were leaving back to our respective states. What I didn't know was an omen of the future presented itself. Nina looked to Rogue, said something along the lines of "when we get back to [State They Live In], you're going to work on getting a job, right?" Rogue's response was a defeated sigh and a yes, more or less.
Well, you'll never guess what didn't happen. /s
See, when Nina and Rogue moved in together two years ago, Rogue had a job at Target, which she abruptly no-call no-showed quit from and never returned to for work or shopping. She was floating on savings of close to $30k. Savings she didn't have access to at first due to her mother, who at the time we thought was just abusive and controlling because we all had wool over our eyes. Knowing what I know now, I think her mom was in the right to withhold the money, and isn't perfect, but just cares deeply for her daughter, as all mothers should.
But at the time, we didn't think that (for reasons irrelevant to this situation & very personal to the people involved, so I will not share here). So we helped Rogue fight for access to the $30k that was rightfully hers. Eventually we won, and she had that money. I could be mistaken in the specific numbers of the following, but as far as I know this is either mostly or entirely accurate. By the time we all went down to Texas in October 2023, she had $26k out of $30k left. This didn't raise any flags for us, because of rent and all that. (I say I could be mistaken because it could've been $26k from the start, not $30k, I don't remember because this was over a year ago now).
But come May/June 2024 (7/8 months later), we learn that $20k out of the remaining $26k went on to be used on daily Doordash, expensive d&d stuff, and other non-essential, expensive junk. Rogue came to Nina saying she had $6k left, which scared Nina half to death because that wouldn't last them the rest of their lease. Rogue wouldn't be able to pay her half of rent like that. From October to now (8 months), Rogue hadn't even TRIED to get a job, and STILL wasn't looking, even now that she knew if she didn't get an income fast, they'd be screwed. She'd known this for a WHILE and didn't tell Nina until now.
Or should I say... Nina would be screwed. Rogue had her family back in [home state] she could go back to if they got evicted, and with the way she was living (we'll get to that), that'd be a luxury probably. Nina though? Nina's family was either dead or had 0 contact with her for serious personal reasons. If they got evicted, Nina would be homeless with her two cats.
This STILL did not inspire Rogue to job hunt. From May/June up to August, Nina, Jenny, me, Jan, our other friend Angel, and 11+ other people in our friend group Discord servers that I will leave unnamed for privacy were hounding her to stop wasting money on Doordash and eat proper food, stop buying expensive "hobby" stuff she didn't need and currently couldn't afford, apply for jobs (multiple of us even sent her applications we found for her), and be a better friend. She applied for very few jobs, got maybe ONE interview that she somehow bombed, and fought Nina every step of the way on applying to anything that didn't actually interest her. She refused to accept that she had a very short amount of time to find a job and therefore couldn't afford to be picky. Nina explicitly told her that if they got evicted because of Rogue, she'd be homeless, and even that wasn't enough for Rogue to stop thinking of herself and her preferences first, all she would do is woe-is-me about how "guilty" she felt thinking about risking Nina's stability, instead of doing something to stop risking it. This was all throughout June 2024.
In May 2024, just before we all found out that Rogue was down to $6k in savings, I hadn't been involved in whatever had happened, but I saw a wall of text from Rogue in the vent channel of one of our two discord servers. I had no context, but she was apologizing for "not being a good friend" and that she'd do better, etc etc. Pretty standard but honestly bland stuff, a real YouTuber Apology of a vent. I didn't ask anything since I wasn't involved in whatever drama and moved on. I didn't realize this was the start of all of our falling out with her.
And then, somewhere around the same time, I learned a bit of context for the "not being a good friend" part. Because then Rogue treated me like shit. It's honestly the LEAST fucked up part of this entire thing, but it's crucial context for the rest because this was the beginning of the end. TLDR, she reblogged this post from me and shit ALL OVER my current hyperfixation and biggest passion, all because she hates it. You can read her shitting on it in the tags of that link. Since you're all JSE community members reading this, you'll see right away how she's the world's biggest hypocrite in her "reasoning" for shitting on my interest, but I digress until further into this timeline of events. Overall, it was dumb as hell and even though I was very hurt and angry, I didn't confront her on things. I'm not gonna argue over something so stupid.
But then, after seeing that vent post & a week or so later, I ask Jenny in vc what the context was, because I knew they were involved. Jenny goes on to tell me that her, Nina, Jan, and some others in our friend group are tired of Rogue's shit because she'd been insulting THEIR interests, only talking about herself and what interested or benefited her, stroking her own ego and not-so-subtly trying to get them to stroke it too, guilt-tripping them left and right for things, and a bunch of other toxic and selfish (although small in comparison to what we're Getting To) things. Overall, Rogue's vent I'd saw was right. She hadn't been a good friend lately. And that's not including the lack of job searching before we found out about everything, or everything else I'll be talking about here.
Now that I had context and knew I wasn't the only one who Rogue had treated like shit recently, I was angry about the whole tag rant thing all over again. I told Jenny, showed them that post, and she was livid on my behalf. But nothing came of it yet, it was still just a stupid thing and we moved on. We ranted, laughed how ridiculous it all was off, and moved on.
Until we found out about the Being Down To $6k In Savings thing in May/June. The recent shitty behavior had us really unhappy, but when we found out she was on her way to sending Nina into homelessness, THAT was the point where our friendships with Rogue became threatened. Everything before then was just imperfect at best and toxic at worst average friendship stuff that could be unlearned and improved on, which we had already told Rogue was what we wanted. We never wanted to cut her off for her behavior, no matter what she may say now.
So we all buckled down on telling her to stop wasting money, be a better friend, job hunt, etc etc etc. It was made very clear that if she didn't get a job ASAP and shape up, she'd start losing us as friends for fucking Nina over like that. To keep everyone in the friend group on the same page while we were all buckling down on her, all of us from both discords (not every single friend is in both servers but a good handful of us were in both) made a chat to keep each other in the loop of everything. If we were going to help Nina get Rogue to get her shit together AND save our friendships with her (which we ALL wanted to), we were gonna have to collaborate and keep communication clear and up to date.
Despite Rogue being Oh So Terrified of losing us as friends and knowing we were all talking together in order to make her fix the situation she created, getting a job STILL didn't happen and she started making excuses for getting Doordash or otherwise spending money instead. Anytime she wasn't getting Doordash, she was surviving off junk food like doritos or poptarts rather than cleaning the kitchen up enough to actually use it and cook herself something proper. (Again, we'll get to the whole cleaning thing.)
At one point she even told Nina she was considering overdosing because she was so upset by all of us "being mean to her" (read: holding her accountable for her actions or lack thereof, and sternly but civilly telling her to job hunt and helping her to find a job, etc). Nina, with Rogue's consent, confiscated her medications and would give her the appropriate dosages in a plastic baggie at the right times from hereon out. Even so, we were all now being manipulated by her into fearing she'd kill herself if we kept trying to make her get a job and change her behavior.
To avoid Tumblr's screenshot limit, I'm going to provide this masterlist of screenshots of Rogue's behavior instead of the actual ones, though I will be more than happy to post any those in a separate reblog or share them in DMs if anyone reading this is THAT skeptical of this timeline of events. (I doubt it, but I'd like to restate that I'm a bit anxious to expose all of this because I don't want it to backfire. Our friend group went out of our way to keep this a friend group thing and not a fandom thing, but now we've changed our minds because Rogue has been vague-posting and lying to other people who weren't involved in the situation, two of which I can tag and/or name if that was necessary. Due to the lying to other people in the fandom, we have all decided this has to all come to light so people can be aware that they WILL be manipulated by Rogue about this).
And the following screenshot is a summary of everything Rogue was doing as a shitty friend, roommate, and person. This bullet list was made to help other people in the friend group silence their anxiety and reassure themselves that they aren't a toxic person like Rogue, hence the way it's worded. (We'll get to the pet harm one).
So from June to August, we would consistently update each other on any serious interactions with Rogue about anything to do with the situation, or any other instance where Rogue was being a shitty friend in some way that pertains to the bullet list and links to screenshots pictured above. Forgive me if I've forgotten any significant events between here and this next part, it was a lot of the same old There She Goes Again type shit, like being picky about where she applied for a job despite having no time or right to be so choosy when she created this situation and Nina's home stability depended on her finding a job ASAP.
One thing that I do want to note that happened in this time: Since the time she shit all over my current favorite interest (May), I had not spoken to her. I was mature and decided that if I had nothing nice to say, I wouldn't say anything. I just stood by and watched her treat my friends like shit and continue to refuse to actually help Nina any more than the bare minimum (if that). She noticed this eventually (June), and started asking our other friends about me (I had once again retold what happened to everyone in the chat we had, everyone was angry on my behalf), instead of actually trying to talk to me. FINALLY (June), she reached out to me instead of trying to get info out of our friends, asking me what she did wrong.
Well the thing is, she KNEW what she did. She did the moment she did what she did. If you look at the link I provided, she reblogged the post FROM ME, guaranteeing I'd see her shit on MY interest, then APOLOGIZED TO ME INSINCERELY at the end of the rant. She'd realized why I was angry at her even BEFORE she messaged me, as a few of our friends had previously showed me screenshots in our group chat that she had straight-up SAID she knew why.
Her playing stupid pissed me off even more, but I decided that since this whole thing was stupid in the first place and there were a million other fairer reasons I didn't want to be friends with her anymore at this point, I said fuck it and indulged her. But I wasn't going to baby her through this civil conversation, I was blunt because I deserved to be and I knew that if we DID fix things, I'd regret never speaking my mind instead of coddling her.
I sent her a paragraphs long explanation, calling her out on every reason it was shitty and unfair of her to say what she said and how it made her hypocritical, and she NEVER replied to me. Not in June, not in July, not in August when this all ended. NEVER. She GHOSTED me, on a conversation SHE initiated and asked for, and Nina had been physically there when she read the message, and TOLD me she WITNESSED her read the message I sent and then never replied.
It became clear to me in that moment that she did not actually want to talk this out and fix things, she was expecting me to cater to her in some way and make her feel better. Or to confirm I hated her (I didn't. Yet.), since she has such low self-esteem that she often goes out of her way to either a) get people confirm the things she thinks of herself, or b) get people to coddle her and reassure her she's not what she thinks she is, only to tell them she doesn't deserve for them to say those things and they're wrong to say it. Which I'm sure COUNTLESS people in Rogue and [someone else I'll leave unnamed but is reading this]'s theorist discord server have WITNESSED themselves. (A discord server in which I was a mod in, until within the last 24-48 hours Rogue removed me from it with no warning to anyone anywhere, might I add).
From June through July, it quickly became clear to our friend group that things were not going to change, and Nina was terrified she was going to become homeless. We set up a Go Fund Me for her, which some of you may have seen me post a few months ago when this was all going on.
In mid-July 2024, in a last ditch attempt to help her fix things and help Rogue get on her feet, Angel took it upon herself, with Nina's consent (& pleading), to fly from [west coast state] to [midwest state that Nina and Rogue lived in], 1700 miles and $1k to do, all to save our friendships and a sticky situation.
See, Angel's been through the RINGER in life to say the least. She knows how to do tons of adulting stuff like job hunting and cleaning and the like because they've had to do it themselves for a very long time. The premise of the trip was that Angel would fly to [state], help Rogue job search, help Rogue & Nina clean the apartment (a combo of Rogue being lazy despite being home 24 hours a day + Nina working a full time job prevented them from doing so and it was BAD [picture proof provided soon]). By the time Angel would go back to the west coast, Rogue would have a job, our friendships would be saved because Rogue would be on track to make up for everything, and Nina would no longer be at risk of being homeless. Our friend group would bounce back and move on, slate cleaned.
Except Rogue didn't cooperate. Angel arrived, and had eye-witness confirmation of things Nina had told us about being roommates with Rogue. Here's a summary of things Nina had told us (CW: gross):
Rogue would leave massive clumps of her hair stuck in the shower & bathroom in general, on the floor, the walls, and apartment carpet(s), especially in her own bedroom. (We'll get to this, but *I* witnessed this in person too).
During one such instance of this, her hair clogged the shower drain so the water couldn't leave the tub, she closed the curtain to hide it (the curtain was almost never usually closed, hence Nina's confidence this was intentional), and hours later one of Nina's cats jumped into the shower only to launch right back out soaking wet. Nina investigated and found the tub with water in it and a massive clump of hair clogging the drain.
Rogue's hair everywhere was such an issue that Nina's two cats would puke up hairballs that were Rogue's hair instead of their own.
The kitchen was unusable because Rogue had the entire area cluttered by boxes she never unpacked upon moving in. She even had them set on the stove-top.
The kitchen garbage was overflowing almost constantly and Rogue would have to be hounded repeatedly to take it out, only to make some excuse as to why she didn't/couldn't. I would like to restate that for the last 9+ months at this point in time, Rogue was home all day every day. There was NO reason she could not clean anything in the house.
Rogue would leave Doordash garbage around the garbage can or elsewhere in the kitchen, and Nina's two cats would get into said garbage while Nina was at work and Rogue wasn't paying attention, which could've gotten them seriously sick or worse. At one point, one of the cats ate something stringy, which for those of you who don't know, can wrap around their intestines and potentially kill them. Thankfully, the cat threw up what it ate.
Rogue would treat the cats in general as an inconvenience to be around unless they were cuddling her. Then she would brag that they liked her, but go right back to the former if they were around otherwise. Nina herself would have to elaborate on this more but honestly it's not that important, you get the point.
Angel sent our chat picture proof of some of these things via text and pictures. We were horrified to learn that all the time Rogue was spending rotting in bed was quite literally leaving a stain on the mattress. [BELOW THE CUT, REFER TO PICTURE SET #1.] I'm being considerate and not just outing something so embarrassing and gross, while still providing proof that we aren't making this up to make Rogue look bad. This is all to demonstrate the extreme and make it very clear we did not abandon Rogue for no reason like she's been claiming to others. And I'll spare you all the state of the apartment's toilet, but 99% of it was stained. I'm reiterating that Nina did not have time to clean this herself, she would work all day and most of her free-time was spent sleeping FOR work, trying to get Rogue to job search and hold up her end of the apartment, or doing other responsibilities.
Overall, Day 1 of Angel's stay went tense and awkward, but decent; Rogue applied for jobs, Angel and Nina cleaned some of the apartment (living room, kitchen), Angel cooked for the them rather than them getting fast food for once. Things seemed a shred hopeful. Day 2 would not be so fruitful, nor would the rest of Angel's time there.
On Day 2, Angel had successfully acquired Rogue two job opportunities: A job fair that went from 1pm to 4pm, and another at a Costco not far from the job fair. Rogue went to one (1) interview at the four hour long job fair, then DITCHED the Costco interview completely. When she returned to the apartment, her excuses to Nina and Angel were that it was "too far" and "too hot out" to do the interview. "Too far" being 15-30 minutes at most, and "too hot" being 74F (23C) outdoors, an air-conditioned car ride, and an INDOOR interview in an also air-conditioned building. Rogue then proceeded to spend the rest of the day in bed playing on her DS instead of cleaning, applying for other jobs, or doing anything to help Nina and Angel. Once they updated the rest of us in our chat, it became clear to us that Rogue did not care about getting a job fast enough to prevent the eviction, did not WANT a job, and would not change.
Day 3 of Angel's stay would only prove this. Rogue continued to do nothing. She was told to clean her room [REFER TO PICTURE SET 2 BELOW THE CUT], and Angel and Nina went out to the laundromat and to do other errands.
Sometime into this, Rogue messaged them asking when they'd be back. They were unsure. A few hours or so later, Rogue messaged them again, saying she was returning to [home state] for "a family emergency." We all knew she was lying and actually fled the state to avoid cleaning her room and continuing to be held accountable for everything by Angel and Nina. Shortly after, another of our friends informed us Rogue had told them that she was going back to [home state] to "clear her head."
Nina asked when Rogue would return to [state they lived in]. Rogue said Monday. Monday was the day Angel would be returning home. How coincidental /s.
This is when our friend group decided Rogue and salvaging our friendships was a lost cause, she had more than proved she was unwilling to change or help Nina, or do anything of real substance to save our friendships with her. We had given her chance after chance after chance from May 2024 to July 2024 to change, find a job, etc, with no real progress on any of it. We removed her from all our common discord servers, removed her as a friend in places, unfollowed her on relevant social media platforms, some of us even blocked her.
She was apparently blindsided by this, even though I and other friends in the group had warned her all the way back in JUNE that if she broke the apartment lease by running off (she had previously threatened to before she actually did, going as far as to call her mom and discuss plans to do so) or otherwise left Nina to drown in the mess she made, we'd all cut her off. She immediately began seeking other people not in the loop of things (such as members of the theorist discord) out for pity, coddling, and to claim that she was being unfairly abandoned by her friends for no reason. This was all around the end of July 2024.
She has continued to do this even now, almost two months after the entire situation was finalized. I have witnessed this countless times myself, as I was IN the theorist server as a mod until she kicked me out of it with no warning 24-48 hours ago. Her continuing to seek out others who aren't aware of the situation and getting them to pity her and crying about how we "abandoned her for no reason" and making us look bad is why I'm posting this.
To none of our surprise, a week or so after she initially fled the state, she messaged Nina again and said she had decided to stay in [home state] and was going to break the lease and move back in with her family. Her family would pay her remaining half of rent for the rest of the lease (they wrote Nina a check for $4.1k), and she'd be free to stay there like a coward, because god forbid she get a job, clean up after herself, or stop being a toxic, selfish, self-loathing child instead of acting like a real 26 year old adult.
Her family made arrangements with Nina to drive from [northern home state] to [midwestern state Nina and previously Rogue live(s/d) in] to move Rogue out of the apartment in early August 2024.
This scared Nina a little, because her and Rogue's family really didn't get along due to reasons I'm not specifying in this post because they're not super relevant. Again, Nina has basically no family to back her up and two mischievous cats. She was afraid to juggle catsitting, the move-out process, and tension with Rogue's family on her own.
Therefore, me & our friend Corr from [midwestern state], our friend Cy from [different midwestern state], and our friend Deor from [southern state] all drove anywhere from 4.5 to 11+ hours of our own volition to meet up at Nina's apartment the night before Rogue's family arrived so we could help her handle Rogue's family if they were an issue, babysit the cats, and then help her deep-clean the apartment once Rogue was completely out. We had hoped perhaps we could confront Rogue one last time too, so she could look us in the eyes as she fled the mess she made and the bridges she burned. Rogue hadn't spoken to me since the "discussion" we had in early June (2+ months ago).
I got to witness some of the disgusting conditions Nina and Angel had talked about myself. [REFER TO PICTURE SET 3 BELOW CUT].
On move-out day, Rogue's family was shockingly pleasant despite our expectations. And despite confirming she was with her family and having no idea I, Corr, Cy, or Deor were there, Rogue never stepped foot in the apartment or lifted a finger to help her family move her out. Her family had her stuff removed from the apartment in an hour or less. Her mother, who we had thought this entire time hated Nina, even came to Nina when it was all done and apologized about Rogue, saying she had no idea Rogue was living in such filth or causing this much of an issue for Nina. Despite us telling her we were going to clean the apartment after they left, Rogue's mother insisted she would clean a bit first. Her whole family said we were amazing friends for driving from so far just to support Nina and help her watch the cats and clean up.
The only reason Rogue knows we were all there was because she for some reason touched Snapchat for the first time in a million years (I genuinely forgot she had one and that we were friends on it, that's how little she touches the app. For that reason, I believe she was intentionally looking for proof we were there because her family may have told her that we were) and saw a selfie I took of the group of us out to lunch together after the move-out was finished on my snap story.
None of us from the entire 15+ person friend group have spoken to her since (almost 2 months), minus Nina when it was necessary. We blocked her everywhere, left 99% of mutual servers, etc. Even so, she has continued to beg for attention and pity from people in the theory discord (where multiple of us could see it, myself included. Again, I was a mod until she very recently kicked me unprompted), as well as vague-posting/venting in places, such as the post I am reblogging here, acting like she was abandoned for no reason and we were the bad guys.
For that reason, we all REFUSE to let her lie to other people and manipulate them, dragging our names through the mud no matter how vaguely she does so, and fooling people into continuing to coddle her when she is a toxic, lazy, self-absorbed coward. We weren't going to air this out in public anywhere, we weren't going to turn this from a friend group thing into a fandom thing, but she's done that herself by publicly lying multiple times about the situation and herself. I can't stand watching innocent people pat her on the head and call her a "valid bean uwu" anymore. I refuse to be silent about our falling out any longer, and I refuse for her to manipulate anyone else in this community.
I know a lot of JSE community members look up to her. But this was necessary, and I think a majority of people would rather know this and avoid the toxicity than suffer the way me and our friend group did, building and maintaining a friendship with her for 7+ years only for her to let it all fall apart like a wet paper towel the moment she's held accountable for her mistakes and refusal to change & improve herself.
If anyone has any questions for me, or anyone else in the friend group, I'm sure we'd all be happy to clarify or elaborate on things. You can send me asks or DMs here on Tumblr, and I will gladly forward anything necessary to the friend(s) in the group you would like to talk to.
I'm sorry I had to do this. But I hope in outing this all, the community will be better for it.
PICTURES OF APARTMENT BELOW CUT. CW: GROSS.
